Always A Silver Lining
by ennisjackgal
Summary: Sequel to Living In The Now. In 2012, Ennis and Jack have recently married and are enjoying their new life. Their decision to start a family sets off events that will change everything for them as they try to cope with something that could destroy their relationship.
1. Chapter 1

_Author's notes_

_Hey guys! Here's the sequel to Living In The Now. As you read this chapter you might find it very similar to The Choices We Make, but I promise it will be very different as the story unfolds. There will be a huge plot twist that I think you'll like to see unfold, so please bear with it. Happy reading!_

_Kathryn xxx_

* * *

**Chapter 1**

_August 3rd, 2012_

It was a beautiful summer morning and Jack had crept out of bed to make breakfast. It was exactly four months since he and Ennis had gotten married in Central Park and he wanted to surprise his husband with breakfast in bed; it seemed like a good day for it.

He often woke up before Ennis, and during those mornings he would gaze at the man beside him and think about how different his life was now. He had never thought that he would end up living in New York again but here he was, married and happy. Things had never been smooth sailing for them, but they had pulled through and he was glad for it; he didn't like to think what might have been.

He stood at the counter, sliding pieces of bread into the toaster and thinking about the day ahead. They both had to work, but his mother would be meeting them in the city for lunch and that was something to look forward to. He missed his father but was glad that they had the chance to reconcile before he died; his father had accepted him and his condition.

Living with HIV came a lot easier to Jack these days; he kept himself healthy and didn't do anything risky. He had a wonderful man by his side who would do anything to make him happy and Jack was very grateful for that. He and Ennis had discussed marriage a few times over the last couple of years but he couldn't believe that they actually were, legally too.

He fondly recalled that day when he'd entered the coffee shop and Lureen had told him that someone was looking at him. Seeing Ennis for the first time was a memory that Jack would always treasure.

He finished the breakfast and got it all onto a tray, grinning to himself as he took it through the apartment to their bedroom. They had chosen one with two bedrooms, knowing that one day they might want to expand their family. No serious discussions about that had taken place yet; they were still enjoying life as newlyweds.

Jack entered the bedroom to find that Ennis was still asleep; he put the tray down on the dresser and sat on Ennis's side, shaking him gently. "Ennis?" he called softly, wanting to see those deep brown eyes that warmed his heart. "Come on, bud..."

"Hmm?" came a grunt as Ennis stirred, blearily opening his eyes. When they met Jack's, he couldn't stop the smile that spread across his face. "Morning, darlin'...what's going on?"

"Breakfast in bed," Jack informed him, gesturing to the tray. Ennis smelt the coffee and immediately perked up, rubbing sleep from his eyes. "You remember what day it is, right?"

Ennis thought for a moment and then nodded. "Yeah...four months since we got married..." He took Jack's left hand in his own, so that their rings clinked together. "Four months since you made an honest of man of me," he added with a smirk. Jack looked at him.

"You were always honest, right from the start," he replied seriously, and then his face relaxed. "We better eat up before it gets cold." Ennis nodded and sat up so that Jack could give him the tray, and Jack soon joined him in bed. They placed the tray between them and settled in; they didn't always have the luxury of time on a workday to do this so they wanted to make the most of it.

"Still can't believe we're really married," Ennis said as they ate, smiling at Jack over his coffee cup. Jack nodded.

"I was thinking the same thing in the kitchen...and how far we've come since we got together. Wasn't always easy, but...we're here now. We made it."

"Yep..." Ennis hesitated and then decided to tell Jack something that he'd been thinking about. "You know...if we had been allowed to get married back in California...we would've been married a lot longer than four months by now, I reckon."

Jack nodded. "I know...when we got back together after my hospital stay, I think we probably would've ended up married by the end of the year, or at least close to it. Wonder if the law will ever change over there?"

"I don't know...but we don't have to worry about that now. And if there's any other gay couples there who wanna get married...I reckon they'll end up moving like we did."

"Yeah." Jack decided not to ask about children just yet; they hadn't been married for very long and it was a huge commitment. They were devoted to each other but it was still a life-changing experience and he needed to be sure that they were ready for it. He would think it over at some point before talking to Ennis. "Gotta say...I never thought I'd be living here again after what happened. But coming back here that Christmas with you...it really helped me to get over what happened to me, and...I just want to thank you for that," he said softly, gazing into Ennis's eyes. "You...you've been my rock, you know?"

Ennis leaned over and kissed him warmly, very glad that Jack had come to terms with the attack and its aftermath. It made him sick to think of his sweet Jack going through something like that, to be in such pain, and he had been tempted to try and seek an even harsher punishment for Daniel Waters, preferably the death penalty if he could. Since that hadn't been possible, he'd instead focused on making Jack happy; something which he could definitely do with no problem.

"You're gonna be just fine," he murmured to Jack, nuzzling their noses together. Jack grinned.

"Thanks to you," he replied, and then took a deep breath. "You make me really happy, bud..."

Ennis nodded and they returned to their breakfast, talking about work and what they would be doing today. Life had settled down for them, and they had a future to look forward to.

* * *

Jack was heading down the street towards the café to meet his mother when his phone buzzed in his pocket; it was Ennis.

"Hey, handsome," he said cheerfully, stopping for a moment.

"Hey, darlin'. Look...I can't make it to lunch. We're swamped here at the vet's and I've got to cover for someone..." He sounded so apologetic that Jack just wanted to hug him.

"It's okay...you've gotta do what you've gotta do. Considering our jobs, it's no surprise if we have to sacrifice our own time now and then. Don't worry about it, okay? I'll see you at home."

"Yeah, you bet. Give my best to your mom. Love you, Jack." He seemed more relaxed and Jack smiled to himself.

"I love you too," he replied before hanging up and carrying on. They had always known that they couldn't spend twenty-four hours a day together; it was just part of life. Besides, they'd had a leisurely breakfast that morning and that would get him through the day until he saw Ennis again.

He strolled through the park with confidence, even taking the same path that he had done so many years ago. Jack still felt slightly apprehensive, but it was more to do with the memories than actual fear. They hadn't been living here for long, and he figured that his fears would go away in time. His attacker was locked away where he couldn't hurt anyone and that was a comforting thought.

He made his way to the café to meet his mother, looking forward to seeing her. She had always been there for him even when his father hadn't been, and Jack would never forget that.

She was already there when he walked in, watching the door. She smiled widely when their eyes met and stood up to hug him.

"How are you, my boy?" she asked, embracing him tightly. Jack hugged her back; no matter how old he got she would always be his mother.

"I'm good, we both are," he replied as she let go. "Ennis has to work and can't get away for lunch, but he sends his best."

Karen nodded, feeling a little disappointed. She had always liked Ennis and was very grateful to him for making her son happy, during a time when she'd thought he might never be. Their wedding had been one of the proudest days of her life and she saw Ennis as a son now.

"Well, at least you two are working hard. That's something," she said as they sat down. "Are you doing okay?" she asked him, and he nodded.

"I'm fine. T-cells are high and viral load's down. Doesn't seem to be going anywhere either way," he told her with a smile. "I haven't been sick or anything, and my doctor's keeping a close eye on the Videx just in case."

"I remember when you were in hospital," she said quietly, eyes lowering. "I'm just glad that you two saw sense in time."

"Guess it was the wake-up call we needed," he agreed as they looked at the menus.

They ordered their food and started talking about work, but Jack got the sense that his mother wanted to ask him something else. Eventually, she bit her lip and looked at him. "Jack...I wanted to ask...about what's next for you and Ennis. I mean, you're married now. And...the next logical step..."

"Having kids," he finished for her, and she nodded. "Well...we always looked at it as a someday kind of thing. We figured that it would happen when we were both ready; we've never really had a serious conversation about it. We sure haven't made any plans." He paused for a moment. "I was thinking about it this morning, and it's a huge thing to think about. We love each other, and we're happy as newlyweds. I don't want us to go rushing into anything if we're not ready for it."

"I know, honey," Karen replied, resting a hand on his arm. "I don't want to put pressure on the two of you, but I think you'd be great parents."

He smiled at her. "Thanks, mom. You know...it would be amazing to have a kid with him, somehow. I know we can't do it the normal way, but there's options. I've read about them..." He thought for a moment. "I do wanna have kids with him someday, and...we agreed this morning that if it had been legal for us to get married in California, then we would have done a lot sooner. We've only been married for four months because of the law." He took a deep breath. "We've been together for almost three years now...maybe it is the right time for us. You don't have to be married to someone to know if you want a family with them; there must be a lot of gay couples with kids who can't get married but that didn't stop them."

"It's up to you, Jack...it's a big deal and you need to be sure before you talk to Ennis," Karen reminded him, but he shook his head.

"You know what? I think we're already there. You're right; it's the next logical step and we love each other. We're doing really well and...I'm sure we can handle it." He smiled at his mother. "I'll talk to him tonight at dinner, at least suggest it. I don't think he'll feel too pressured; we moved in together after only a few months and a break-up. I reckon it's okay to take things quickly if you're sure about them."

He nodded to himself as the food arrived; it made sense. He would never force Ennis into anything but he believed that Ennis would be all for it after some thinking. He knew it was a lot to consider but he had faith in their relationship and was certain that they could do it. Now all he had to do was talk to his other half and hope that he was in the same place.

* * *

Jack used most of his afternoon to think about what he would say to Ennis at dinner. As much as he wanted to have kids with Ennis in some way, he was well aware that he couldn't force the issue; if they weren't ready but did it anyway, it could harm their relationship. That was the last thing he wanted.

When he left the clinic, he received a text from Ennis; he was already home and starting dinner. They had agreed early on that whoever finished first would start dinner, and had settled into this routine quickly. Jack had always loved living with Ennis, and this had increased tenfold since their wedding.

He entered the apartment to find Ennis at the stove, a delightful smell wafting from the area. He smiled when Ennis turned around. "Hey, bud."

"Hey," Ennis replied, walking over to him and planting a kiss on his lips. "Work okay?"

"Yeah, great," Jack told him, and then looked over at the stove. "What're you making?"

"Chicken korma," Ennis answered, gesturing over to where the sauce was waiting to be added to the chicken and herbs. "Thought something spicy might do us some good."

"Sounds good," Jack replied, and kissed Ennis one more time before letting go of him. "Work alright for you? Said you had to cover for someone..."

"Yeah, that went okay. How's your mom?" Ennis asked as he resumed cooking. Jack sat at the island.

"She's doing okay. I know she misses my dad, but...I think she's coping." He looked at Ennis. "Makes me wonder how I'd cope if..." Ennis glanced at him.

"Don't think on it, darlin'. We're both healthy, even you most of the time. I'm not going anywhere."

Jack smiled. "I know...just saying. Look, there's something I wanna talk to you about...at dinner. Nothing bad, just something I wanna run by you."

"Sure," Ennis replied, thinking that he knew where this was heading. They were settling into married life after all; perhaps it might be time for the next step.

While Ennis cooked, Jack exchanged a few texts with Lureen to see how she was. Still living in San Francisco, but had now been promoted to manager of the coffee shop where she worked. Jack knew that she wanted to get into fashion and he hoped that she could make it; she had made his and Ennis's wedding suits just four months ago and they had kept them.

"Lureen says hi," he informed Ennis. "She's still trying to get her résumé to designers and stuff. Hope she makes it."

"Yeah...those suits are really something. Dinner's nearly ready, bud..."

"Okay." Jack got up from the sofa and set the table for them both; they worked together very well in domestic situations. He was nervous about talking to Ennis about what his mother had asked, but he was sure that they could talk it through. They were doing really well, after all, and they were very happy together. He did want to have a family with Ennis.

They talked as they ate, about everything but what was on Jack's mind. They always talked about work when they reunited at home afterwards and they liked to spend this time together. Eventually, Ennis couldn't avoid it anymore and he just had to know what Jack was thinking about. "Bud...can we just get it out there? I know something's on your mind."

Jack sighed and nodded, putting down his spoon. "Alright. When I was talking to my mom at lunch, she started talking about our wedding and how things were going for us. She asked me...if we were thinking of starting a family. Having kids in some way."

"Right...well...we can talk about that," Ennis replied, feeling unsure. They had only been married for four months. "Um...do you really wanna have a family with...me?" he asked. He and Alma hadn't been together long enough for that conversation to come up, so this was new territory for him. Would he even make a good father?

"Of course I do," Jack told him, taking his hand across the table. "Ennis, I love you. I'd carry your baby if I could and you ought to know that by now. We're married, and we're doing so well right now. Any baby we have would be raised in a loving home with two committed parents, just like it would need."

"You're right about that," Ennis agreed. "But...we've only been married four months," he added, now uncertain. Jack lowered his eyes.

"Only because of the law...we agreed that we would've done it sooner if we could. And we've been together nearly three years...isn't that long enough to know when you want all that stuff with someone?" He began to fear that Ennis didn't want it.

Ennis squeezed his hand. "You're right about that, too," he said softly, making Jack meet his eyes. "I do want all that with you, bud. We are gonna have a family one day, I promise. I just need to think this over, alright? It's a lot to think about."

Jack nodded. "I know. I don't wanna put pressure on you, Ennis...that's the last thing we need. But...I'm sure we'd be great parents. I know we can do it."

Ennis smiled. "You're probably right. Tell you what...we'll talk about this tomorrow at dinner, alright? Just give me tomorrow to think about it."

"Sure," Jack agreed, smiling. They resumed their meal, Jack feeling hopeful about their future. Ennis was torn; he did want to have kids with Jack but he was worried about turning into his own parents. He hadn't spoken to them since before the wedding, and that hadn't gone well. They were truly estranged now and he couldn't run the risk of being like them.

On the other hand, he had Jack to help him stay grounded. Jack would make sure that he didn't turn into his parents, but instead into a good one to a child of their own. Maybe they could do this, as long as they worked together.

* * *

_August 4th, 2012_

Ennis thought about Jack's suggestion all day while working. He so wanted them to make a family, but couldn't quite shake off the worry of turning into his parents. They had been fine when he'd come out to them and even when he'd initially introduced them to Jack; that wasn't the issue. Their only problem had been when he'd told them about Jack's HIV status; that had killed any possibility of them accepting the relationship. Ironically enough, he'd told them only after they'd asked about children.

He sat at his desk for most of the day, with the clinic being quiet. He kept running things over in his head so many times that he soon became tired of it. Ennis pulled out his phone and smiled when he saw the wallpaper; a photo of himself and Jack during their wedding in the park. They had been very happy during their relationship so far, despite their brief breakup a couple of years ago. He was very glad that he'd seen sense and had been keeping a close eye on Jack's health ever since.

There was a knock at the door and the receptionist poked her head in. "Are you busy? There's some more paperwork to do..."

"Sure," he replied, and Rachel dropped the files on his desk. She was a good friend of his and Jack's, living in the apartment below them, and she could tell that something was on his mind.

"You okay?" she asked, arms folded. Ennis shrugged.

"Jack...yesterday he asked me about us having kids. I told him I'd give him an answer tonight."

"And...that's a problem?" Rachel asked, sounding confused. "You love each other, right?"

"Yeah, we do. That's not what I'm worried about," he told her. "I keep thinking that I might end up like my parents. Harsh...prejudiced...cold." The last word was spoken quietly, but she heard it.

"Ennis...I know I don't know you guys that well, but...you told me what happened. How they couldn't accept Jack after you told them about him having HIV...and how they never came to the wedding. You're not like that at all. I'm sure all parents of gay men and women worry about their kids catching the virus and God knows what else. That's probably normal because all parents want to protect their kids. But if your kid ended up with someone who's positive...I don't think you'd react badly because you know what it's like. As for prejudiced...that doesn't even come into it. You're gay; how could you possibly be prejudiced?"

Ennis sighed, hands over his eyes. "I know...don't know what to do, to be honest."

He continued to think about it, and then realised that everybody probably had the same fears about having kids. Surely everybody worried about whether or not they would be a good parent, but that didn't meant that they wouldn't be. Rachel was right; he was very different from his parents and he had Jack; what did they have to lose?

With this decided, he couldn't wait to tell Jack. They could start talking about how they would do it and would make plans. It was both exciting and terrifying and he loved the notion.

He did wish that he and Jack could have a child together, but he knew how impossible that was so they would have to deal with that. There were other ways but he didn't know much; there was plenty of time for that.

When he entered the apartment and found Jack starting dinner, he smiled and slipped up behind his husband, arms wrapping around Jack's waist. Jack looked down and grinned. "What's all this now?"

"Been thinking about what you said," Ennis said softly into his ear. Jack froze. "I...I wanna do it, Jack. I wanna have a kid with you...however we can."

Jack turned in his arms, eyes wide. He couldn't believe that Ennis had said yes, and that he seemed so sure about it. "Ennis...you sure? It's a huge thing..." Ennis took his hands.

"I know. But I was talking to Rachel. She made me see that I was worrying about nothing; just because my parents are the way they are doesn't mean I'll be like that. I'm not like them and never will be. If a kid of ours got together with someone who's positive, or even caught it themselves...I'd never react the way they did. I know what it's like to love someone so much that you don't care about the risks." He looked into Jack's glistening eyes. "I know we can do this, Jack."

"Are you sure?" Jack asked him firmly, needing to know that he was serious about this. It was a huge deal and required a lot of planning. "Once we get started, there's no going back."

"I don't wanna go back," Ennis replied. "I wanna go forward, with you. You're my future, darlin'...that's just how it is. And I want us to have a family. You were right yesterday; we would have married sooner if we could, but three years together is long enough to know what we want. There's gotta be gay couples out there who have had kids together somehow but can't get married; it didn't stop them. I say we should take advantage of what we've got, and do this."

Jack nodded, seeing the sense that Ennis was making. "Okay," he replied, taking a deep breath. "Let's do it, then."

"We're gonna be parents," Ennis said to him, pressing their foreheads together. Jack laughed, euphoria running through him and warming his heart.

"We sure are...you and me...daddy and, well...daddy." Ennis joined his laughter and they embraced tightly, Jack kissing the side of his face in happiness. He couldn't believe how happy Ennis had made him over the last few years, yet here they were. They were married and now were going to try and create a family. Neither of them knew the details but that didn't matter; it was going to happen anyway and they couldn't wait.

* * *

The pair of them were smiling all the way through dinner after their agreement to start a family, but decided not to tell anybody until the details were all sorted. They would have to go and speak to their doctor about their options and could do that on Tuesday; it was a rare day in that they were both not working then.

Afterwards, they curled up on the sofa together and kissed softly as they watched TV, hands entwining as they thought about having a family together.

"Still can't believe it," Jack murmured as he looked up into Ennis's eyes.

"Me neither..." The clock chimed eleven and he sighed. "Well...you ready to go to bed?" he asked, voice heavy with all the implications that carried. Jack grinned.

"Hell yeah. I wish we could say that we were gonna make a baby but that's not really possible. Still...we'll figure it out."

"We sure will, bud. Come on." Ennis switched off the TV while Jack went to lock the door. This was undoubtedly their favourite time of day; when they were preparing to go to bed together after a long day. They both knew what was going to happen and were very much looking forward to it.

Ennis took Jack's hand as they walked across to their bedroom, leading him inside and then turning him to face him. "I love you, darlin'."

Jack grinned and kissed him warmly, tongue sliding against Ennis's. "I love you too. Let's get in..." They moved to their respective sides of the bed and started stripping, eyes watching each other carefully. Ennis caught Jack's lustful expression when his jeans were removed and his cheeks coloured slightly.

Once they were settled in bed, they instinctively turned to each other. Ennis stroked Jack's face with the back of his hand. "You wanna?" he asked even though he knew it was obvious.

"Yeah...want you inside me," Jack murmured, nuzzling their noses together. Ennis nodded and kissed him, stealing Jack's breath as their tongues met once more. Jack trembled at how Ennis could make him feel with just one kiss; they were just meant for each other.

They kept kissing as Jack tugged at Ennis's waist, wanting more contact. Ennis knew the signs by now and rolled on top of him, settling between his legs and grasping Jack's hair in his hands. He trailed one hand down to lightly brush against the swelling and felt Jack moan in his mouth; he couldn't take much teasing when he was so hopelessly aroused.

Ennis grabbed the lube and smoothed it over himself, and thankfully remembered to also grab two condoms and put them on himself and Jack; he sometimes hated having to remember that but he knew it was for his own good.

"Fuck me," Jack breathed as Ennis nuzzled his neck, getting into position. Jack lifted his legs and wrapped them around Ennis, needing more. "Come on..."

"Steady on, bud," Ennis replied softly as he worked his way inside Jack, feeling around for the most comfortable point. A low groan came from Jack and he knew he'd found it. Now ready, he took Jack's hands and held them in his own, pinning them above Jack's head. "You ready?" he asked, feeling Jack's fingers curl around his own. Jack nodded and he started moving, sliding in and out at the steady rhythm that they both knew so well. His movements were slow but smooth, taking Jack deeper every time and knowing that he was making his lover feel good.

He watched Jack's face as they rocked together, seeing how he was making him feel. Jack's eyes were closed and his mouth open in bliss, unable to speak. Ennis thought it was a beautiful sight and couldn't help but kiss Jack's neck, biting softly.

"God, I love you," Jack croaked, pushing back to meet Ennis's thrusts. He couldn't believe how well they suited each other. They were best friends and could talk about anything together, but also make each other's toes curl in arousal. Sex could be seen as the darker side of their relationship, but not in a bad way. It was what went on behind closed doors with the promise of love and lust and everything they felt for each other. Their attraction to each other bubbled all day when they were together, finally spilling over when they got to bed. But even in their most frantic bouts of desire, Ennis could still remember to make him feel good in a different way; it got to his heart and made him fall even more in love.

Ennis sensed that Jack was close, if the whimpers in his ear were anything to go by. He took hold of Jack, this time not teasing, and stroked him in time to the thrusts. They came together in a jumble of moans and cusses, holding on to each other tightly as they rode it out and then collapsed. Jack panted heavily as his senses tried to sort themselves out, unable to think about anything but how good that had been. "Damn, Ennis...that was something else."

"You say that nearly every time," Ennis observed breathlessly, grinning. He winced when he pulled out and rolled off Jack, sighing contentedly. They removed the condoms from themselves and Ennis went to get some paper towels for them both. Once cleaned up, settled down and Jack curled up against him, head nestling in Ennis's collarbone as he was held. Ennis kissed the top of his head and took his hand. "You feel good?"

"Mmm...better than good," Jack replied, squeezing his hand. "You just...always know what to do. You know what'll make me feel good. It's like we can read each other's minds or something."

"Maybe because we're soul mates," Ennis suggested. There was a time when he hadn't believed in that, but not anymore. Since being with Jack, he knew what this was. It was the kind of love that you waited all your life for, but always ended up being so much better than anticipated.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

_August 7th, 2012_

Ennis and Jack were sat in their doctor's office, waiting for him to retrieve information on the different ways in which they could have a child. Jack was well aware that if they wanted one of their own, then Ennis would have to be the biological father because of his negative status. He didn't feel resentful, and if that was the only way then so be it.

Their hands were linked between them and Ennis kept running his thumb over Jack's hands, clearly thinking. He wondered how it was all supposed to work and he hoped it wouldn't be too expensive; they weren't exactly rich.

Still, he knew he wanted this. Ever since they had agreed to try to have a baby he had been looking forward to it. They really would make good parents and the child would still have a female influence because of their friends. Apart from Rachel, the child would also have Lureen at least whenever she visited. He wasn't sure about Alma; she was supportive of their relationship but it might hurt too much for her to see him have a family with Jack. That was understandable, and he didn't want to force her to be involved if she didn't want to.

"So..." Their doctor's voice distracted them as he came back into the room. His name was John and had been very good to them since their move here. He was keeping an eye on Jack's medication after their scare with the pancreatitis and Ennis was grateful for that. "You've chosen to have a child together and I've gathered information on your options." He sat down opposite them and fanned out the leaflets.

"What've we got?" Jack asked, leaning forward.

"Well, you're obviously unable to conceive naturally so you have two options. One is adoption, either with a child of someone you know who is putting it up for adoption, or by putting your names on a register and waiting for someone to call the agency looking for prospective parents. But I should warn you...same sex couples aren't exactly at the top of the list and it could take a long time for someone to pick you."

Ennis nodded, feeling the injustice. Too many people thought that gay people wouldn't make good parents. "What's the other?"

"That would be artificial insemination. You would choose a mother for the child, perhaps a close friend if you're short on cash. Hiring someone could get expensive and most people prefer asking someone they know because of trust. Now...Jack, I'm afraid you wouldn't be able to be the father because of the HIV, which means Ennis would have to be if you still want the baby to be related to you."

"We know," Jack replied, feeling Ennis squeeze his hand. "Whatever it takes...we can do it."

"Good. Once you've chosen a mother and everything has been signed, Ennis would have to regularly provide sperm and this would be injected into your chosen mother. Hopefully, she will be impregnated and you will have a baby."

"How many tries would we get?" Ennis asked.

"That depends on how many times the mother is prepared to go through this. A close friend will likely want to try as many times as it takes. According to law, you would have to pay her but the fees would be a lot lower than if you hired someone. But the details of the contract can be agreed between yourselves and her, whoever you choose. Once the baby is born, Jack would then adopt it as his own so that the two of you are its parents. However, you can allow the mother to still be part of the baby's life and for her to be referred to as the mother. She would have no parental rights to the child but I strongly recommend that she is still involved somehow."

"Right..." The only woman that came to Jack's mind for such a request was Lureen; they didn't know Rachel that well and Alma was out of the question. He knew that Lureen would be fair with them if she agreed. "So all we have to do right now is pick someone?"

"Yes. When you have, bring her in and we can get started with ironing out the details. It could be a long process, far more than just the nine months of pregnancy. But if you choose someone you can trust for this and everything works out, it should be smooth sailing."

"Okay," Ennis replied, nodding to himself. He then looked at Jack. "Guess we better go thinking about all of this."

"Yeah, we should. Thanks, John," Jack said to him, shaking his hand and taking the leaflets. Ennis bid goodbye to their doctor and they left, blinking in the bright sunshine when they got outside. "Got a lot to think about..."

"Yeah..." He looked around. "Wanna get some lunch?" Jack nodded and they linked hands again as they wandered down the street, looking for the first café they found. They knew the city very well by now.

They found one of their favourites and sat inside, rifling through the leaflets together. "Jack...I know we're all excited about doing this, but we should remember to think everything through before deciding anything," Ennis said to him, and Jack nodded.

"I know. I'm not sure about adoption, Ennis. It's great to give a home to a kid that needs one, but...you heard him. We could be on the list for years just because we're gay and nobody wants us to raise a kid because they think we're sick bastards..." He took a deep breath. "Well..."

Ennis smiled at him, liking how Jack could be so vocal about what he believed in. "Don't worry about it. We'll figure this out and have ourselves a kid. If we don't want adoption, then there's insemination. Let's look into that a little more when we get home, on the internet."

"Right," Jack agreed as the waitress came over, ready to take their orders.

* * *

When they got home, they sat on the sofa together and started looking on the internet for information about artificial insemination. While their doctor had described the basic procedure, they still wanted to know more about the legal side of it. Jack's family lawyer was now working with both of them as well so they could always ask him.

"I reckon it's our best shot," Jack concluded after a while, scrolling through. "At least then the kid would be related to one of us."

"Yeah...you sure you're okay about that?" Ennis asked, squeezing his arm. Jack looked over his shoulder at him.

"I really am. I know I can't have kids, Ennis. I've known that for almost eight years now. I've just had to deal with it as much as being positive. Besides...it'll still be ours together, with a friend."

Ennis nodded, and then began to think of something else. If he was soon to become a father, then should he tell his parents? They had been estranged ever since they had learned that Jack was positive, and despite Ennis's attempts to get everybody on the same page it just hadn't worked. They hadn't even attended the wedding, which had hurt the most for him. The death of Jack's father made him want to be close to his own parents, but he couldn't do that when they couldn't accept Jack.

"What are you thinking about there?" Jack asked, seeing that something was on his mind.

"My parents," he replied in a low voice. "Just wondering if I should tell them that I'm gonna be a dad." He cleared his throat. "I mean...they'd be grandparents. That's a big thing."

Jack put the laptop onto the coffee table and turned to face him. "Ennis...you said you didn't want anything more to do with them. I know we invited them to the wedding and they didn't even reply...but I thought that was it now. How long have you been feeling like you want to talk to them?"

Ennis should have known that Jack could see right through him, and lowered his head. "Since your dad died," he said quietly.

Jack looked at him in shock. "Ennis, that was two years ago. Why didn't you say anything?"

He shrugged. "Didn't think it would ever happen, especially when we had that scare and tried to talk to them again. When we stormed out a second time, remember?"

"Yeah, I do..." Jack grasped his hands. "You should have told me how you're feeling. I'm not gonna lie to you...part of me still hopes that you guys can work it out. I know you won't talk to them until they accept me, and I sometimes wish that it wasn't an issue. But if you really do want to at least try with them, you know I'll be supportive. I'm not going anywhere; as your husband it's my job to offer support when you need it."

"You wouldn't mind if I tried to talk to them? I know you don't exactly like them..."

Jack shook his head. "It doesn't matter. I'm thinking of you, bud. Besides...when we went to New York that first time, at first I wouldn't talk to my dad because of what he said to me when I caught it, and I certainly didn't like him then. But he apologised to me and said he wanted to know me. Okay, he was dying at the time, but still. He made the effort and I figured it was only right that I do my bit too."

"I still want them to apologise to you," Ennis told him firmly, squeezing his hand. Jack nodded.

"I know you do. And I'm grateful that you're standing by me like that, but I think you should at least try to bridge the gap. If you don't...I'm worried that you'll end up regretting it like I nearly did." He kissed Ennis softly on the mouth and rubbed the back of his neck. "You see what I mean?"

Ennis nodded. "Think I do. Thanks, darlin'." He smiled and kissed Jack again. "What would I do without you, huh?" he asked, and Jack grinned.

"Go crazy," he replied, nudging Ennis's nose with his own. "Anyway...let's get back to this." He picked the laptop back up and resumed his position between Ennis's legs, getting comfortable. Ennis liked having Jack leaning against him like that; he was always warm and cosy. He kissed the back of Jack's neck and peered over his shoulder at the screen.

Conversations like this were just one reason why Ennis loved Jack so much. They really could talk about anything because they were so close, and Ennis knew that Jack would never judge him for anything. He'd tried to be a good partner to Jack and make sure that he did his part in making their relationship work. He thought they were doing a good job because they were so happy, and he wished that his parents could see how it was all worth it despite the risks.

He was sure now that they would make great fathers and all they had to do was choose a mother. He had a feeling that Lureen would be their best option and he hoped that she would be willing to do it; they would be asking her to put her body through a lot over nine months and then give up her baby after it was born. Of course they would let her have as much contact as she wanted and would include her in the important decisions of the child's upbringing, but it was still a lot to ask.

But as they sat there, comfortably nestled together, Ennis felt sure that everything would work out. He did love Jack and was prepared to do whatever it took to make a family with him; it was what they both wanted.

"Love you," he said softly, kissing Jack's ear. Jack smiled but didn't reply; they didn't always need to. They each knew how the other felt even without words.

* * *

The pair of them spent the day in the apartment together, enjoying the rest of their day off. After lunch, they relaxed on the sofa for a while and slowly made out, keeping their hands above their waists because they didn't always need for it to progress to sex; sometimes kissing for a long time satisfied them until later on.

When they were watching TV and waiting for dinner to cook, Jack cleared his throat. "You know...there's one thing about all this that we haven't talked about yet."

"The mother," Ennis finished, knowing what he was going to say. "Well...I've been thinking. What about Lureen?"

Jack smirked. "Great minds think alike. I reckon she's our best option. We don't know Rachel all that well and she's got a boyfriend; he might not like her having a kid that isn't theirs. It's weird for some people and they can't always cope with it." He bit his lip. "We can't ask Alma...it's not really fair for you to ask her to carry your baby and then give it up to us."

"Yeah, I don't wanna hurt her like that," Ennis agreed. "Is Lureen seeing anyone?"

"Don't think so...she usually mentions stuff like that when we talk. I think she'd be happy to do this for us if we asked...she was always supportive of us, and...it's because of her that I didn't die when I got pancreatitis. If I'd been alone when I collapsed, it could've been hours until someone figured out I was missing. Probably not until the next day when I didn't turn up for work. I...I could've died that night if she hadn't been there. I know we're both grateful to her for that."

Ennis nodded, trying not to think about that night. He remembered Lureen's phone call and how he'd dashed around to get to Jack's side. He held Jack a little closer to him and Jack felt guilty. "Sorry...I know you don't like thinking about that."

"Was a hard time for both of us, even though it was just a few days," Ennis replied, resting his head on top of Jack's. "But I know what you mean. She deserves to be part of our family after everything she's done for us. But...she was your best friend before we met. Are you sure you'd be okay with her carrying my baby? Wouldn't it be weird for you?"

"Maybe at first," Jack agreed, playing with his fingers. "But at the end of the day...I couldn't carry your kid even if I was negative. And she can, so...I'll just have to deal with that. It's gonna be our kid anyway, even if we didn't make it together." He turned to smile up into Ennis's face, feeling a lot happier now that they were making plans. They were going to be parents. "It's fine, bud."

Ennis nodded. "What if...she can't do it? For any reason? What do we do then?"

"Try and find someone else. We could always ask Rachel, just in case she can." He thought for a moment. "Other than that...we could hire someone to do it. But it wouldn't be anybody we know and that could create all kinds of problems. What if they've got terms and conditions of their own, like wanting partial custody or demanding that the kid spends a certain birthday with them? That's not the way to bring up a kid."

"I know. Hope Lureen can do it then. If she does, we'll let her have contact as much as she wants." Jack nodded his agreement. "And I reckon we could let her have a say in the big decisions, like names and schools and maybe even colleges one day. She would be the kid's mother, after all."

"Yeah. I think every kid needs a male and female role model," Jack mused. "Especially if our kid turns out to be a girl. One day she'll need to know about...female stuff and that's not exactly something we know a lot about." He smiled. "But imagine us bringing up a kid together...teaching them how to walk and talk...birthdays, Christmas...wouldn't it be great?"

"Sure would," Ennis replied, smiling to himself. He could just imagine himself and Jack raising a child together. "What about our jobs? Could we both get paternity leave?"

"Probably, but I think we should ask our lawyer about that," Jack answered. "There's a lot of answers we'll need before we start this. So...about Lureen. I know she's coming over in two weeks to see us. Should we ask her then?"

Ennis nodded. "Yeah, I think so. Then we've got time to talk to Peter about all this. I'm sure he can tell us everything we need to know. And maybe we can tell your mom that she's gonna be a Grandma."

Jack grinned. "She'll love that. Look...don't worry about your parents. If you wanna see them, that's okay with me. I'll give you whatever support you need. And if you don't...it's up to you. Either way, I'm on your side. Alright?" He looked up into Ennis's eyes, into the warm brown gaze that he loved so much.

"Alright, darlin'," Ennis replied, and was about to kiss him when the timer went off. "Looks like dinner's ready," he added, reluctantly disentangling himself from Jack. When he went over to the kitchen, Jack stretched and thought about their plans. He couldn't wait for things to get started, but at the same time he was willing to take it slowly so that they could plan properly. He knew that everything would be fine for them, and he hoped that Lureen could help them.

He set the table while Ennis got the food out of the oven and started dishing it out for them; they worked well together and he knew it would be a great home for a child one day. Considering how the law had changed for people like themselves, he thought it was a good idea to take full advantage of it. And now they would be, because they loved each other.

* * *

_August 3rd, 2012_

It had been exactly three years to the day since they had first met, so Ennis and Jack had arranged to go out on a date since it was a Friday. They liked to go out together whenever they could anyway because they thought it would be good for them, but this was a special occasion.

When he got home after work, Ennis entered the bedroom to find Jack trying on a red shirt that he'd bought him for Christmas. "Hey, darlin'."

Jack grinned at him in the mirror and turned around. "Hey, bud. Good day at work?" They kissed and Ennis nodded.

"Yeah, kind of quiet, though. Probably a good thing since we're going out tonight. Don't wanna be on overtime."

"I know. What d'you think of this?" Jack asked, spreading his arms so that Ennis could see properly. Ennis nodded his approval, trying to ignore the slight pressure in his jeans.

"Yeah, you look...beautiful," he said softly, unable to keep a smile from his face. Jack's cheeks coloured and he turned to look at himself.

"Alright, then. What are you gonna wear?"

"Don't know..." Ennis opened up his side of the wardrobe and mused over what he could wear. At first he hadn't really understood why married couples on a date made so much effort to look good for each other, since they were already together and didn't really need to impress each other. But now he got it; dates were special nights for married couples, all about keeping the flame burning. Not that he and Jack had any problems; far from it. But he did like how they were still so interested in each other and wanted to make the effort.

While Ennis was deciding what to wear, Jack had finished and was in the living room, flicking through the paper as he waited. Some part of him was fearful of finding an article about Daniel Waters either escaping from jail or being released early, but there was nothing yet. He didn't know what he would do if that happened; they couldn't just leave because they had lives here now, and they were trying to make a family. They would just have to cope with it.

Jack grinned when he felt a pair of familiar arms circle his neck, followed by a kiss on his cheek as he smelt cologne. "Mmm, you smell good."

"You look good," Ennis replied in his ear, nuzzling the dark locks. "You ready to go?"

"Yeah, you bet," Jack replied, putting the paper down and standing up. He stared at Ennis, who was wearing a crisp white shirt that certainly worked well with his skin tone. He could also see Ennis's muscles quite clearly underneath and gulped, now feeling aroused. Ennis smirked.

"Cat got your tongue, Jack? You wanna skip the date and just go to bed?" he asked in amusement. Jack shook his head.

"No, we'll go out...but I'm gonna get you good later," he warned playfully. Ennis raised his eyebrows.

"I'll hold you to that," he replied as he put his jacket on and grabbed his keys. Jack led the way out of the door and waited in the hallway as Ennis locked up, and then took his hand.

"So, where we going?" he asked. Ennis smiled; he loved living in this city. They lived on Montague Street near the Columbus Park here in Brooklyn Heights, but because they both worked up in Manhattan they spent a lot of time there.

"Thought we'd go to that River Café near the Bridge," he replied. "We haven't been there yet and I heard it's romantic. Thought we'd give it a try."

Jack nodded, looking forward to it already. They arrived there by cab and Jack soon saw why Ennis had chosen this place. The whole place had a nautical feeling to it, being right next to the river, and he was taken aback by the main dining room when they were shown to their table; there was a spectacular view of Manhattan from here and since night was falling the lights were starting to appear in buildings. It really was very romantic here.

"This is amazing," he breathed as they took their seats, looking out across the water. "I can't believe we've never been here before."

"Well..." Ennis started, looking sheepish. "It's not exactly a cheap place. But since it's an anniversary I wanted to bring you here. Special night and all."

Jack smiled at him and they picked up the menus. "Well, it was a good idea. I love it here..."

Ennis saw the light in Jack's eyes and knew he'd done the right thing. "I won't ever forget the day we met," he said softly, and Jack met his eyes. "Wasn't all that happy and...you changed all that."

"You know what you've done for me," Jack replied, taking his hand. "You know I was lost and mostly alone...that I needed someone to take care of me. You did all that and...the time we were apart was just horrible." He would never forget that no matter how much he tried.

"I know, and I'm sorry for that," Ennis told him, squeezing his fingers. "But I swear...it won't happen again. I'm not going anywhere now, ever. Staying right by your side." He saw Jack smile and let go of his hand. Music started playing in a corner of the room and he saw a few couples get up to dance, one of them being two men. Seeing that nobody was batting an eyelid, Ennis nudged Jack gently with his foot. "You want to...when we've eaten?"

Jack looked over and then nodded. "Sure. Don't think we'll get thrown out; those guys sure aren't." It was not lost on him just how much things had changed around here since he'd left. He knew that hate crime was still going on around the city, but they hadn't been subjected to any of it. He figured that they would be safe as long as they stuck together.

* * *

The next day, Ennis and Jack had decided to stay in bed all morning together. It was a Saturday and they didn't have to work, but they were also worn out from the night before. Once they had got back and into bed, they just couldn't take their hands off each other. Jack had started by pushing himself into Ennis and making love to him slowly, which had been as enjoyable as ever. Then once they'd cooled down from that they had sucked each other off and then rubbed against each other to finish. It was as if they couldn't get enough of each other, and they were quite tired by the end of it.

Jack blearily opened his eyes and saw Ennis lying next to him, still fast asleep. He smiled as he remembered everything they had done last night, and blushed slightly. Ennis sometimes had doubts about his skills in the bedroom, but Jack had always thought of him as the best lover he could hope for. He saw to his own needs and to Jack's as well, was never selfish and always considerate.

"God, I love you," he whispered, stroking Ennis's curls as he slept. "Can't wait to have a family with you..." He pressed a kiss to the top of his husband's head and slid out from between the sheets, eyeing the many condoms they had used the night before. He grinned and went to dispose of them in the bathroom. He sometimes disliked how they had to remember to be so careful, but they had to live with that.

He blinked when he turned the light on, being used to the dark. All was quiet and the clock told him it was almost seven. It was light outside and he figured that the city would be waking up by now.

On his way back to the bedroom, he heard his cell ringing and realised that it was still in his jeans, which were on the bedroom floor. Praying that it wouldn't wake Ennis up, he crept back and pulled his phone out, taking it away from his sleeping partner.

"Hello?" he asked without having looked at the number.

"Honey, it's me," came his mother's voice. "Sorry to disturb you so early...were you still in bed?"

"Kind of...we were out last night. What's up?"

"Just wanted to know how things are going for you guys. I wouldn't call so early, but I'm off on a little trip later to see a friend over in Vermont. I'll be gone for a few days and I just wanted to say goodbye."

"Oh. Well, um..." He figured it was a good time to tell her. "Well...I talked to Ennis about having kids, and we agreed that we're ready. We're gonna do it." Even as he spoke, a grin unfurled across his face. "We're gonna ask Lureen to be the mother."

"Jack, that's great! I'm gonna be a Grandma," she said happily.

"You sure are. I'll let Ennis know you called."

"Alright. I'll talk to you when I get back. Bye, honey."

"Bye, mom." He hung up and headed back to bed, seeing that Ennis was still asleep. _Guess I really wore him out, _Jack thought to himself as he slid back in, turning to face his husband.

After a few minutes of looking, Jack noticed that Ennis was starting to stir. Any minute now, those deep brown eyes were going to open and pierce into his heart like they always did. "Morning, sleepyhead," he said softly as Ennis blinked until his eyes were open. "You sleep okay?"

"Mmmph," Ennis replied, rubbing the sleep from his eyes. "Jack? Did you move? Thought I felt you leave the bed..." He couldn't explain it; he had sensed Jack's absence even though he'd been asleep.

Jack nodded. "I went to use the bathroom, then my mom called. My phone was in here; surprised it didn't wake you up."

"Guess you wore me out," Ennis told him, a smile forming on his lips. "C'mere..." Jack leaned forward and their lips met softly, moulding together like a perfect fit. "Mmm..."

"We can stay in bed as long as we want," Jack said to him, stroking his curls. "Only just after seven and it's the weekend."

"Yeah, probably a good idea," Ennis agreed with a yawn. "How's your mom?"

"She's off seeing a friend in Maine; that's why she called so early. I told her about our plans to have a kid; she seemed really happy about being a Grandma."

Ennis smiled as Jack shuffled closer to him, and he wrapped an arm around Jack. "I'll bet." He felt Jack kissing his neck, not in a sexual way but just out of affection. He loved it when Jack kissed him, wherever he did it. Those lips were just so talented and he knew he was very lucky. "That's good..."

Jack kissed his ear. "Just like kissing you...can't help it." He nuzzled their noses together. "Love everything about you..."

"Same to you, darlin'," Ennis replied, and then he yawned again. Jack heard his jaw crack and winced, rubbing it tenderly.

"Go back to sleep," he said softly, seeing Ennis's eyes starting to droop. "Reckon you need it after last night."

"Mmm..." Ennis fell asleep with a smile on his face. Jack couldn't really move now with Ennis's arm holding him securely, but he didn't really want to. He was happy to spend the next few hours just looking at Ennis, even if he didn't fall asleep. They were warm and cosy in their own bedroom, with nobody to disturb them and no reason to get up. The world could end around them and he wouldn't care as long as they were together.

_I love you...wish there were stronger words to describe how I feel about you. I keep trying to show you every day...and I hope you know what you mean to me. _Jack sighed inwardly and moved closer, curling up against Ennis's warmth and closing his eyes.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

_August 12th, 2012_

On Sunday, Ennis and Jack had meetings with their lawyer and their doctor. They were both aware that they had to gather as much information as they could before doing anything.

As they sat in the waiting room of their lawyer's office, they were looking through the leaflet on artificial insemination and how it all worked. Jack hadn't said anything, but he was looking forward to helping Ennis donate sperm when the time came; he figured they could make it fun and enjoy themselves.

"You sure about us asking Lureen to do this?" Ennis suddenly asked, looking at him. "I mean...she'd have to give up her baby. I know we'll let her visit whenever she wants, but it'll still be hard for her."

Jack nodded. "I know, and I've been thinking about that. It's up to her if she's willing to do it, and we'll just have to remind her of that. Maybe when the kid's older, they can spend time with her over there."

"Yeah, that'd be good." Ennis thought for a moment. "Shame we live so far apart...if she lived here then she could move in with us or something. But she's got her own life over there."

"I know. I'm sure we'll figure it all out." Just as they squeezed their hands together, the receptionist told them they could go into the office.

Peter was waiting for them, smiling when they saw him. He had always been a good friend to Jack and his family, especially when Daniel Waters had been caught. "Hey, you two. How are you doing?"

"We're good," Jack replied as they sat down. "I was wondering if you could give us advice about something."

"I'll certainly try." At this, they explained to him what they wanted to do and that they had chosen to have Lureen as the mother of their baby.

"So basically, we need some legal advice for how it's all supposed to work."

Peter nodded. "Well, you could draw up a contract with my help; it's not as restrictive as it might sound. Basically, you would name your terms and you would have to give it to Lureen so that she can read it through and make sure it suits her. If it doesn't but only requires minor changes that you can resolve between yourselves, then that's fine. Given that she is such a close friend, I think it's safe to say that you can come up with an arrangement that suits all of you."

"What would that involve?" Jack asked, feeling a little out of his depth. He'd never understood law very well, at least not to this level.

"Well...for example the parental rights. Jack, you said you wanted to adopt the baby as your own. In this case, the contract would have to include something about Lureen giving up her parental rights to you after the birth so then you could adopt it. I know it sounds harsh for Lureen, but it's the only way. She has to be fully aware of what will be required for her, or it could be a mess."

"Is there anything we could put in there that might...I don't know...make things easier for her? Doesn't strike me as a very fair deal right now," Jack said, worrying slightly. Lureen had been such a good friend to him and he didn't want to hurt her.

"There could be. For example, when the child is older they could spend time with her in California. You could make sure she is involved in all the major decisions of the child's early life. Her lawyer would advise her to have terms of her own, so the three of you would need to come to an agreement. But the parental rights is the most important issue. The child would be living with you, and in the case of an emergency it wouldn't be wise to try calling her for her permission, like with surgery. You might not be able to reach her, and you wouldn't want to waste time. If the two of you have parental rights, you can make decisions in an emergency."

Ennis nodded, seeing the logic in this. "So we should make one of these contracts, and if she agrees then we give it to her to look through?"

"Yes. If everything is okay with her then she just has to sign it. If negotiations are needed until all three of you are happy with it, then fair enough. We can do that too. So...if you come into my office next week I can start drawing up a template for you. We can work things out then."

They nodded and shook his hand, glad that he was able to help them. They left his office and headed back out into the sunshine. Jack stretched and looked at his watch. "Well...we've got a couple of hours until our meeting with John. What d'you wanna do?" he asked, looking around.

"Maybe we could just...go for a walk?" Ennis suggested, nodding towards Central Park. Even though they lived down in Brooklyn Heights, the majority of their day was spent up here. Jack was no longer afraid of the park, mainly because it was where they had gotten married. He felt as if that one day had somehow erased years of fear, and he knew he owed it to Ennis. He took hold of his husband's hand as they walked, enjoying the beautiful weather and seeing one or two of their friends. Life was good here for both of them, and he hoped that it would all work out with Lureen.

They stopped at a bench and started kissing, lost in their own little world. Being in a fairly secluded area, they felt free to do this; even though they weren't doing anything illegal, they still didn't want an audience. Jack felt empowered by being here with Ennis, and he was truly grateful to have this man in his life; he didn't know what he'd do without him.

* * *

After a couple of hours, they headed for their doctor's office for their second meeting. They needed to know how much it would cost them to use this method and how much Lureen would need to be paid. This was the part that worried Ennis the most; he and Jack were getting by with their jobs but they weren't rich and didn't know anybody who could help them. They were doing their best to save up but he wondered if it would be enough.

He tried not to worry as they waited, holding onto Jack's hand and squeezing his fingers. Their earlier kissing in the park had calmed him down somewhat but now he was worrying again and he knew that Jack could sense it.

"Hey...try not to worry too much, okay?" Jack told him, and Ennis tried to nod in response. "I know it won't be cheap, but we'll think of something."

"What if we can't?" Ennis asked, looking at him. "My parents probably won't help, and your mom might not be able to spare enough cash. What if we're talking thousands here? I don't know if we can do that."

"Okay...worst case scenario? We put it off until we've got the money," Jack told him. "I know we want a kid, but if we can't afford it yet we'll just have to wait. Besides, maybe we won't have to pay it all at once; maybe we can do it in instalments, you know? I'm sure Lureen would be okay with that."

"Yeah, maybe." As with before, they were called into John's office and sat down.

"So, have you come to a decision?" he asked them, and Jack nodded.

"Yep. We've decided to go with artificial insemination. We're gonna ask a friend of ours to be the mother. So...we need to know how much this is gonna cost us."

"Okay. Well...in your case you're looking at around four thousand dollars, I'm afraid. It's standard." They looked at each other, aghast.

"What? I don't know if we can afford that," Ennis told him, feeling saddened. John paused before continuing.

"However...there is always a chance that your friend would be willing to take less, especially if she can support herself. If the process is done at home, then that would lower the cost. Ennis, you would provide sperm at home and then Lureen would have to inject it herself or with the help of a friend. That would keep the costs lower, but we're still looking at that kind of cost."

"Shit," Jack breathed, not knowing what to say. "Um...could she maybe take instalments?" he asked, feeling hopeful. John nodded.

"If you outline this in the contract and she agrees, then yes. Have you met with your lawyer yet?"

"We saw him this morning," Ennis replied. "He explained it all to us...didn't realise it would cost so much."

"I'm sorry about that," John told them. "But you shouldn't give up. There are ways around it and I'm sure you can work something out."

They nodded and decided that they needed to think. "Well...thanks, John. We'll let you know how it goes." He bid them goodbye and they left, holding hands again and leaving the building.

"I think we need to eat something right now," Jack said, feeling hungry. "Haven't eaten since breakfast and I think I'm a little bit in shock."

"Yeah, me too." They headed for the first café they spotted and sat down, wondering what to do.

"I think..." Jack started. "I think our best bet is that Lureen can take a lower payment or maybe in instalments. That's the only way we can do this now. If not, we'll just have to wait until we've got more money."

"Yeah...really wanna have a kid with you," Ennis replied, looking into his eyes. "But maybe that is the best solution. Maybe we don't have to pay anything until she's pregnant; then we've got nine months to pay it off if she'll take instalments. That might work."

"Probably." The waitress came over and took their orders; they had always liked sharing food in the coffee shop back in San Francisco and had continued this habit here. Jack remembered when they were younger and just starting out in their relationship; things had been easier then but he still wouldn't trade this for anything.

"What's with you?" Ennis asked when he caught Jack's smile. Jack shrugged.

"Just thinking about when we first got together...sitting in that coffee shop and meeting up for lunch. When we shared food as we talked about work...they were good days."

Ennis nodded, now also smiling as he remembered those days. "They sure were. After you told me what happened to you, I just wanted to make you happy."

"You do," Jack assured him, taking his hand and squeezing it. "You really do. And what I'm trying to say is...even though things were easier back then, I still wouldn't trade this for anything. I love being in a life with you, as my husband. I think about those few years when I travelled around after leaving college...living in dingy apartments and not having anybody to talk to about how I was feeling...nobody to be there for me. That was a dark time and I'm so glad that I don't have to go back to that. I've got you now, and we'll always have each other no matter how long it takes for us to have a kid."

Ennis cupped his cheek, wishing that he could make all the bad memories go away. "You're right. We'll be just fine no matter what happens." He leaned over and briefly kissed Jack on the lips, feeling Jack smile. "Love you, darlin'."

"Love you too, baby," Jack replied, grinning. He always loved it when Ennis kissed him, ever since their first kiss so many years ago. They'd been through so much together already and he hoped that there wasn't any more drama headed their way; it was the last thing they needed right now.

* * *

_August 15th, 2012_

On Wednesday, Jack was busy at work. He was currently giving a talk to other HIV sufferers about the kind of issues they faced. Some of them had been positive for longer than him, but were still in need of someone to talk to. Most had been infected more recently and referred to him by their doctors.

Jack liked doing this; it gave him a sense of purpose to help others as he knew what they were going through. Apart from group sessions, he also offered one-to-one counselling to anybody who wanted to talk in private. There was a young girl who had contracted the virus from a boyfriend who had messed around with drugs behind her back, which Jack found extremely unfair on her.

One person who was usually present at these talks was Sam Brookes, the other young man who had been attacked by Daniel Waters. Just like Jack, he felt a lot safer now that their attacker was behind bars, but he was still struggling to come to terms with having the virus. Soon after he and Ennis had moved here, Jack had sought Sam out and told him that he was welcome to talk at any time; they were good friends by now.

Jack thought that it was a mark of the strength of their relationship, that he and Ennis could have male friends without feeling threatened or jealous. They loved each other and wanted to be together, so that was just it. Besides, Jack thought of Sam as a younger brother more than anything else. They were connected by what had happened to them both, and Jack was glad that Sam had someone he could talk to.

"Anyway," Jack said to them halfway through the session. "There was something I wanted to tell you. My husband and myself are currently trying to find a way for us to have a baby. We're looking through our options and deciding what to do. I'm trying to say...that this virus doesn't have to ruin your life if you don't let it. I know that some of you are straight and some are gay, but either way it doesn't matter. There are still ways for you to have a normal life as much as possible without this being an issue. As you know, when I was infected I thought my life was over. I didn't see how anybody could love me with what I had. I was lucky enough to find my husband and I know that those of you who are single will find someone too."

He paused for a moment, seeing that someone had their hand up. "What if we're with someone and they can't handle us being positive, even if we're careful?"

"Well...I was nearly in that situation myself with my husband, before we were married. I told you about my hospital stay a few years ago; it was that which made him realise that he loved me too much to worry about the risks. He's willing to stay with me even if he gets infected, but I hope it never happens because I wouldn't wish this on anyone. All I can say is...if they can't handle it, then maybe you ought to think about if it's worth being with them. The person you choose to spend your life with should accept everything about you, even the flaws."

One thing that made Jack so popular here was how honest he was about his own experiences. He'd always felt it was the best approach when talking about this and people liked hearing what he had to say.

After the session ended, Sam came up to him and shook his hand. "Great speech...I wanted to say congratulations for you and Ennis, trying to have a family. That's a good thing to do."

Jack smiled at him. "Thanks, Sam. I reckon we ought to try and find ourselves some happiness wherever we can. That's why I'm so determined to make this work."

"Right. Anyway, what you just said about us all finding someone...thought you might wanna know I've got a date on Friday." He looked quite pleased with himself and Jack grinned.

"That's great, Sam. Let me know how it goes, alright?" Sam nodded and left, leaving Jack to pack up his things.

"Jack?" It was his boss Adam, who oversaw the running of the clinic. "Stirring speech as always," he said with a smile. "People really seem to enjoy listening to you, since you're always so honest."

Jack shrugged. "Reckon they deserve the truth. They've already been through so much and they should know that the virus doesn't have to control their lives."

Adam nodded. "You're right. Anyway, I have a little assignment for you, if you're interested. You noticed the young lady who comes to these sessions and sits at the back?" Jack nodded. "Well, her name's Claire and she's only eighteen. Did she ever say how she was infected?"

"She told me once; her boyfriend messed around with drugs and she caught it from him," Jack replied.

"That's right. The thing is, she's finding it hard to ask questions about it and I think she could do with more support. Her family haven't taken it well and she's living with an aunt. I just think she would benefit from one of your one-to-one sessions."

Jack nodded. "Okay, sure. I'll talk to her. Just tell her to come and see me whenever she wants." Adam shook his hand and left him alone, and Jack smiled to himself. He did like helping other sufferers come to terms with the huge change in their lives and he knew that Ennis was proud of him; Ennis had told him so.

He was to be meeting Ennis for lunch soon and couldn't wait; it was always good to meet up with his other half while they had a breather from work and it kept him going until later when they got home. Life was good for both of them.

* * *

That night, Ennis and Jack were in bed and kissing heavily, hands all over each other. Neither of them could describe it; sometimes they were just so full of lust for each other that they just had to go for it, eager to make their bodies connect.

Over dinner, Jack had told Ennis about how well it was going at work and Ennis had been proud of him, which was probably why he was attacking Jack's neck right now. Jack gave it right back, expert fingers trailing to all the right spots and drawing a moan out of his lover.

"Two can play at that game," he breathed, grinning. Ennis tore his mouth away and looked down at him.

"Oh yeah?" he challenged, coating his fingers with saliva and thrusting them into Jack without warning. Jack yelped and saw lights in front of his eyes, trembling with arousal and groaning.

"Oh God..." he groaned, head tilting back as Ennis explored him, moving his fingers around. He gritted his teeth. "Fine, you made your point."

Ennis kissed him on the lips, finding Jack's tongue with his own and continuing to move his fingers around. Jack broke away. "Ennis...this is good, but...I want you..."

"Tell me what you want," Ennis whispered, moving his face close to Jack's. He loved how they could tease each other. Jack groaned again as he felt Ennis extract his fingers.

"I want you...in me..." he managed to get out, breathing heavily. Ennis lightly brushed his hand over Jack's erection, making him buck.

"Say it," he commanded in a soft and lustful voice. Jack's eyes flew open; they were darker than normal and Ennis knew he'd gotten through to him.

"Fuck me," he ground out. Ennis grabbed the lube and slicked himself up while Jack tore into the condoms, putting one on himself and Ennis as they prepared to do this. "From the back," he said suddenly, putting a hand on Ennis's chest. Ennis's brow furrowed.

"You sure?" he asked cautiously. Jack nodded.

"Want it hard and fast...and that's the best way that won't hurt in the morning." Ennis nodded and flipped him over, nuzzling the back of his neck as he started to work his way in.

"Just relax, darlin'," he murmured in Jack's ear, knowing that Jack wasn't completely over what had happened to him. He trusted Ennis but it could still be difficult for him in this position.

When he was inside Jack and felt him relax, Ennis gently pushed him down for a better angle. "God, Ennis...I love you..." Jack whispered, keeping himself steady on his knees as he felt Ennis's warmth behind him. Ennis was covering his lower back and holding him in place with one arm, wrapping around him securely. Ennis's other arm was stroking his.

"You ready?" he asked, and Jack nodded his permission. He took it slowly at first as he allowed Jack to get used to it and remind himself of who it was back there, and when he felt Jack's hand cover his he knew the signal to speed up.

Soon enough, he was thrusting hard into Jack and trying not to leave bruises on his hips. He could barely think right now; his own hips were moving of their own accord and he felt Jack pushing back against him, taking in more and more and almost growling with lust.

"Fuck!" he gasped, head falling down to rest on the pillow and raising his hips. Now Ennis was mounted onto his body from behind, his free hand taking hold of Jack and sliding along, trying to get them both there at the same time.

"I love you...fucking love you," Ennis groaned into Jack's ear, starting to tremble and knowing that it wouldn't be long. He planted his knees and thrust a few more times until he felt himself coming, eliciting a low moan from Jack. He felt Jack jerk under his touch and the sounds he was making told Ennis that he too was climaxing.

They collapsed together, breathing heavily and unable to move. That had been one of their best times and certainly one that they weren't about to forget.

"Oh God," Jack breathed, feeling satisfied and worn out. "That was something else...you alright?"

"Yeah...just can't move right now," Ennis replied, stroking Jack's back. He could see a layer of sweat there and began lapping at it, liking the salty taste but not really knowing why; maybe it was because it came from Jack and he'd made him do that.

Jack squirmed. "Will you cut it out? You're like a cat with milk or something." Ennis chuckled and pulled out of him, kissing his ear.

"Can't help it...love every part of you. All the liquids you produce."

"Well...there's one you can't ever taste," Jack replied as they disentangled themselves. "Not a good idea to go down that road."

"Probably not." They didn't like talking about all the things they couldn't do because of the virus; it always put a dampener on their spirits. "Anyway...I'll get rid of these and grab a towel." Ennis removed the rubbers and went to dispose of them, coming back with a towel to clean up with. He used it first, knowing that it was the safest way, and when Jack was done he put it in the hamper, going to the bathroom while he was there.

When he came back, he found Jack curled up under the quilt with a smile on his face. "Wanna join me?" he asked, lifting up Ennis's side invitingly. Ennis smirked and got into bed, the warmth washing over him. He put an arm around Jack when he burrowed close, kissing his forehead.

"Mmm...night, darlin'."

"Night, baby," Jack replied, tucking his head into Ennis's collarbone. The patch of skin seemed to have been moulded just for him; they fit perfectly together.

The last thought that Ennis had before he fell asleep was how proud he was of Jack for not letting the virus ruin his life. He truly was an inspiration to everyone, not just to those who also had it. Ennis had learned much from him, too.

* * *

Jack woke up in the middle of the night with a sore throat, coughing a little. He'd been informed by their doctor that this could be a side effect from one of his meds and there wasn't too much concern. He slipped out of bed while trying not to disturb Ennis and headed for the bathroom down the hall, glancing at the clock as he passed; it was just after two in the morning.

As he drank some water and tried to clear his throat, he found himself thinking about everything that had happened today. He was being praised at the clinic for his honesty, but Jack had never considered doing the talks any other way. The companies that made the medication for HIV told people that the pills could guarantee a normal life, which was the kind of propaganda he had always hated. Once someone was infected with the virus, their life would never be normal, and nobody could guarantee them perfect health either.

Jack shook his head as he finished up, wondering why the media couldn't be more honest towards people. He realised that they had to make sales but surely they could do that while still being honest?

_They could tell people that even though they can't guarantee perfect health, at least they'll be better off than without it, _he thought to himself. _The meds do help but I still have bad days when I feel sick because of them. And it doesn't make people forget what they have or what could happen to them._

Jack made his way back to bed and found that Ennis had rolled onto his other side, facing away. He smiled affectionately at how peaceful Ennis looked and he prayed that his husband would never suffer as he did; he hoped that he would never infect Ennis. He slipped back under the covers and grimaced as Ennis stirred; he hadn't wanted to wake him.

"Jack?" Ennis mumbled, looking over his shoulder. "Where'd you go?" Jack put a hand on his shoulder to stop him from turning. Ennis needed to sleep and Jack hated to deprive him of that.

"Shh...go back to sleep. I just needed some water; my throat was sore."

Ennis blinked. "You feel sick?" he asked, concern lacing his voice. He didn't like to think of Jack hurting while he was here sleeping. Jack rubbed his shoulder tenderly, hoping to soothe him.

"I'm fine, really. Don't feel sick. It's just past two; go back to sleep."

Ennis nodded, but didn't drop off right away. "Every time I wake up and you're not there...even if I know you're probably just in the bathroom...I keep wondering if you're being sick or something's wrong..." Jack sighed and kissed the back of his neck.

"I know you worry about me, baby...and I appreciate it. But I'm really okay. If I do start throwing up, I'll shout to you or start throwing things to wake you up. Alright?"

"Okay. Promise me you'll wake me up if something goes wrong," Ennis said to him, meeting his eyes. Jack smiled. He loved how they always cared so much about each other; how could two people be so perfect for each other? They were definitely soul mates; no two ways about it.

"I promise. Come on, bud...get some more sleep. Won't do you any good to lie here worrying."

"Mmm..." Ennis closed his eyes and was soon falling asleep again. Jack wrapped an arm around him and spooned up close, kissing his shoulder before settling down. He thought about those dark times when he was on his own, aimlessly moving across the country before he'd decided to join Lureen in San Francisco. What if he hadn't? What if he'd decided to stay put or go back to New York? He might never have met Ennis and would have continued to be miserable.

Chills went down his spine at the prospect of a life without ever meeting this man, and he sent up a prayer of thanks that things hadn't turned out this way. He had gone to the West Coast and in turn had been able to meet Ennis, and he was fully aware of how much happier he was now than if he hadn't.

Jack was well aware that things had never been smooth sailing for them, especially after their first scare when the condom had broken. But he was very certain now that Ennis wasn't going anywhere. Ennis had even told him that if he did become infected, he would stay put and they would work through it together. By Jack's bedside in the hospital, Ennis had promised to stay with him no matter what. Jack was grateful for this but he hoped that Ennis would never get the virus. It was just too awful to contemplate and he would feel incredibly guilty if it did happen.

All Jack could do was pray that it didn't. As he lay here, holding Ennis close and rubbing his stomach to help him sleep, Jack knew that he'd found the love of his life. Maybe it wouldn't be as bad as he thought if he did infect Ennis, because they would likely work things out. But he would still rather not find out.

_Love you...please stay as you are, for me. I don't want you to know what this thing is like to live with. It's bad enough that you have to see me suffer...you're just too damn perfect and I want you to stay that way. You've been my rock for three years and I don't know if I've got the strength to help you if you get infected. I'm not as strong as you, never have been. We're so right for each other, and I'll never leave you but I don't want you to suffer. Please, God...keep him this way, for me._

Jack closed his eyes and shuffled closer, burying his nose in Ennis's curls and finally falling asleep, thoughts of his love flitting through his mind and helping him dream.


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4**

_August 18th, 2012_

On Saturday, Ennis and Jack had decided to take a long walk together through the park and talk about everything that was going on with their lives now. Lureen would be arriving in just three days and they were trying to work out how to ask her to be the mother of their child. It wasn't an easy question to ask and they knew it, considering that it would involve her giving up the baby and all her parental rights, but they hoped that they could work it all out with her.

Jack's mother would be having dinner with them at their place now that she was back from her trip, and Jack knew that she was looking forward to being a grandmother. He wished more than ever that his father could still be alive to share this with them, but this was how the dice had rolled. He knew that they would all be okay.

It was another gorgeous day and they took their walk slowly, wandering down the path from the nearest entrance after making their way up there from where they lived. Ennis thought it was better for them to live out of Manhattan; it was somewhat quieter there. Not only that, but there were emergency rooms and hospitals quite close to where they lived and that had been the selling point for him; he'd always wanted Jack to be close to medical help in case he needed it.

"So, this whole thing about asking Lureen," Jack started as they walked. "How are we gonna ask her to do this?"

"Well, I've been thinking about it," Ennis admitted as they spotted a bench and sat down. "We could tell her that we wanna have a kid and that we want her to be the mother. Then we just somehow have to make sure she knows that she can have as much contact as she wants. I reckon she should know that we realise it's a lot to ask, and that she can say no if she can't put herself through that."

Jack nodded. "Sounds fair. We can't just demand that she plays by our rules; we have to give her the chance to think about it. She'll be here for a week and from what I can remember about her, she's usually sure about the decisions she makes. She's really strong as well; I'm sure that she'll cope with having to give up the baby when it's born. And it's not as if she'll have to go back right away after the birth; she can stay as long as she needs to, right?"

"Definitely. It'll be hard for her and we know that. So when should we ask her?"

"I reckon the first day she's here, otherwise we'll just be drawing it out and that'll make it harder. She'll know that something's up anyway. We should do it that first day, over dinner or something."

"We don't want her to feel like she's being pressured into it," Ennis reasoned. "Do you think that'll happen if we ask her the first day?"

Jack bit his lip. "I hope not...but it might. We can't pretend that everything's the same, though. She'll see right through that." He sighed. "I don't know...but I reckon we can ask my mom later if she knows the best way of doing it. Women tend to know these things, right?"

"Yeah, I guess. Anyway...are you okay after the other night? With your throat?" Ennis asked, looking at him closely. Jack squeezed his hand.

"I am, I promise. Remember, John said it's a side effect of one of the meds. Nothing to worry about."

Ennis nodded, hoping that this was right. "I just worry about you, bud. You know that."

"I do, sweetheart...but I'm really okay." Jack leaned in and kissed him, warm and tender. It amazed him sometimes how they could be so gentle with each other yet also fierce when they were in bed together. He sometimes felt as if there were two sides to Ennis; one that was sweet and tender but also one that could make his toes curl and drive him crazy. He loved how he knew both sides so well and how they seemed to co-exist peacefully within his husband. "I love you," he murmured when they pulled apart. "You know that, right?"

"How could I not?" Ennis asked with a grin. "You tell me at least three times a day." He nuzzled their noses together. "But I like hearing it."

"Good, 'cos I'm never gonna stop telling you," Jack replied, kissing him again. He then pulled Ennis's head down to rest on his shoulder, which was an unusual position for them.

"Hey...you're usually the one doing this," Ennis observed, getting used to it and finding that he liked it. Jack often said that Ennis made him feel safe, and now Ennis could understand why. It did feel good to be resting on Jack like this.

"I know...but you're not the only one who can take care of someone," Jack said to him, kissing his temple. "I can do it too...and I want to. I know that I probably need it more, with being positive, but...I like taking care of you too."

Ennis smiled and squeezed his fingers. "Well...it does feel good. Not weird or anything. But I won't stop wanting to look after you," he added, and Jack grinned.

"I can live with that." They sat there for a while until they grew hungry, and decided to have lunch in a little café in the park. On the way there, they passed the boathouse and the lawn where they had gotten married just a few months before, the memories precious for both of them. Ennis could remember everything, especially how it had felt to make a legal commitment to Jack in front of their friends. He wished that his parents could have accepted it and been there, but there was nothing he could do about that, at least not right now.

* * *

A few hours later, Jack's mother Karen came over from Long Island to have dinner with them. They liked to get together with her now and then, not least because she was the only parental figure they had right now. Ennis often wished that his own parents could be more like her, but he was also happy that Jack had her.

She tried to help them with dinner but they shooed her away to the living area, insisting that she was a guest and that they would do everything. Karen looked around their apartment; she'd been here before but it always struck her just how well they were doing. They weren't rich but she could tell that Ennis was taking care of Jack just like he'd promised, and she slept well at night knowing that her son would be safe with his chosen partner.

As they worked in the kitchen, she could hear them talking to each other. Mostly it was about preparing the meal, but occasionally their voices lowered and she could tell that they were saying more private things to each other. She was very happy for Jack that he had found someone who could love him and was grateful to Ennis.

"You think we should ask her?" Ennis murmured to Jack as they worked. "I mean, she could give us advice for how to talk to Lureen, like we said earlier."

"I reckon so," Jack replied, nodding. "I've always trusted her advice before; no reason not to with this."

Ennis made a sound of agreement and grabbed the oven mitts, reaching into the oven. They had always liked cooking together; it was a nice domestic task that had always made them feel like a real couple even when they hadn't been living together. They had made a home and they couldn't wait to bring a child into it.

Jack went to set the table while Ennis got the food ready; they had bought a chicken because it was Karen's favourite, along with all the trimmings. Ennis was very aware of which foods didn't sit well with Jack and thus avoided them completely. He was alright with mild spicy food, but not the stronger ones. Ennis simply didn't want anything to happen to Jack.

When they were ready, they sat down to their meal and Karen looked around the table. "You didn't have to go to all this trouble," she said, knowing that they didn't usually when they were on their own. Jack shook his head.

"You're a guest and we wanted to treat you," he told her, Ennis nodding in agreement. "Besides...I bet you don't go all out now you're on your own..."

"You've got me there, Jack. Well, I sure appreciate this anyway." She smiled at them both. "And I want you to know that I'm very proud of both of you for everything you've accomplished. And now you're creating a family..."

"Yeah," Ennis replied, glancing at Jack. "Um...there was something we wanted to talk to you about with that."

"Right," Jack agreed, sitting up as they ate. "Well, we wanna ask Lureen to be the mother. We'd be doing it through artificial insemination, with Ennis as the father. Only thing is...we're not sure how to ask her. It would mean her giving up the baby once it's born, but also giving up her parental rights. You know that we'd let her be as involved as she wants, but she lives on the other side of the country. It'd be hard for her and we're not sure how to make it easier."

Karen nodded. "Well...you just have to be tactful. Remember how difficult it will be for her to do that once the baby is born. Even though she'll know right from the start that you two will bring up the baby, nine months is a long time. She will bond with the child no matter what because it'll be part of her. It won't be easy for her. You hear all the time about women doing this for their friends and then finding that they can't let go; you don't want that to happen."

"We don't; that's why we thought we'd ask you for advice."

"Just make sure she knows she can be involved afterwards and be respectful of her feelings when the time comes to let the baby go. Give her as much time as she needs to say goodbye and don't rush it, no matter how much you're looking forward to bringing the child home."

Ennis and Jack nodded; they had pretty much expected this kind of advice and it did make a lot of sense. "Well, there was something else we wanted to ask...but we understand if you can't help with this one."

"What is it?" she asked, clearly wanting to help.

"Well...our doctor told us that doing this...it's gonna cost us about four thousand dollars. We've got money but we're not really rich, and we don't know if Lureen can take instalments or if the cost might even go up..." Jack bit his lip, hoping that he didn't sound too desperate. He was a grown man now and ought to support himself, but he just didn't know how they could do this on their own.

Karen smiled; she had kind of expected this and was willing to help. "Tell you what. If Lureen says yes and it's all sorted, I can give you half. Would that help?"

Relief crossed Jack's face. "That would be great, mom. That'll help a lot, thank you." She nodded and they resumed eating, both men feeling a little lighter than before. They would never forget this and knew that they had to make every effort if it was going to happen. Now all they had to do was ask Lureen when she came to visit them; that would be the hardest part for all of them, because there was just no telling how things would be in nine months. They just had to have faith that it would all work out.

* * *

_August 21st, 2012_

On Tuesday, Ennis and Jack were picking Lureen up from JFK airport. They hadn't seen her for over a month because she'd been so busy with work, but they were looking forward to it. She would be staying in their spare room, which they hoped one day they could convert into a nursery, and they were working out how to ask her their request.

They were waiting at the gate for her, hands clasped between them as they talked. Ever since their talk with Karen, they had been practicing what they were going to say to Lureen and they hoped that it would work. But at the same time, they had reminded themselves that she might have to turn them down. Perhaps she was seeing someone and it just wouldn't work, or maybe she didn't want to have a child that she didn't see often. If that happened, they would have to re-evaluate their options.

"I'm sure it'll be fine," Ennis said to Jack, squeezing his fingers. Jack nodded.

"Yeah, but I'm still nervous. I reckon we should ask her today at dinner...not sure I can hold it in much longer than that."

"I know." Just then, people started walking through the gate and they kept their eyes peeled for her auburn hair; it had always been so distinctive.

Jack grinned when he saw her and waited for her to spot them. She looked the same as ever, but they could also see that she was better off than before; probably due to her promotion and pay rise. "Lureen!"

"Hey," she greeted, throwing her arms around both of them in a group hug. She had always been a great friend to both of them, and Ennis was particularly grateful to her for getting Jack to the hospital in time when he'd had pancreatitis. She had persuaded Jack to spend the evening with her when he'd been depressed about their break-up, and she had been there when he'd collapsed so had been able to save his life. Ennis would never forget that. "How are you both? You look great!"

"We're doing good," Jack told her as they broke apart. "Doing really well...what about you?"

"I'm happy," she told them as they headed for baggage claim. "That promotion has done me a lot of good...feel like I'm getting somewhere now. What about you two? Enjoying married life, I bet," she said with a grin. They both smiled back.

"Yeah, it...it's something else," Ennis agreed, looking at Jack affectionately. "Better than anything I could've imagined." Jack squeezed his hand.

Lureen's smile dropped slightly as she thought of what she wanted to ask next. "What about...that guy? Daniel Waters? Anything I should know about?"

Jack shook his head. "Still locked up. They'll let me know if he escapes or is released early, and I hope they never have to."

She nodded. "Good. So, how's work?" They talked to her about their jobs while they waited for her suitcase to appear, Jack telling her about his talks and how they were all praising his honesty.

"I mean...I like that they're interested in hearing what I've got to say. And I like that I can talk about my own experiences. But the honesty thing? I've always felt that it's the best way and I can't see why those drug companies can't do the same thing. They make people think that all they've gotta do is pop a pill and they'll feel great, that they can do anything. I'm all for giving people hope but I think they should be honest about it."

Lureen nodded. "I know how you feel...but remember, that's just the way the media works. They highlight all the good things and leave out the bad things because they want to make sales. Not much we can do about that." Her suitcase appeared and they headed out for the cabs, looking for one that would take them home. Ennis and Jack didn't have a car; there wasn't much point while living in New York. They either used cabs, took the bus or maybe hired a rental if they were going further afield, such as when they went to visit Jack's mother.

When they found one, they piled in and were soon on their way home. Lureen was looking forward to spending time with them; she had missed them when they moved here even though she knew it had been the best thing for them. They had wanted to get married and New York had just legalised same-sex marriage; it all fit together for them and they had done what they needed to. California still hadn't followed suit so there was no way they could have stayed.

They got Lureen back to their apartment and set about making lunch while she unpacked, keeping their voices low so she couldn't hear them.

"Now...we're gonna ask her at dinner, right?" Ennis whispered to Jack, who nodded.

"Yep. We'll just come out and say it, ask her to be the mother and make sure she knows that we understand what we're asking of her. I know it won't be easy, but I'm sure we can do it."

"Right." Ennis looked over at Jack and kissed him on the cheek, giving him a surprised look.

"What was that for?" he asked with a grin. Ennis shrugged.

"Just...felt like it. Don't need a reason to kiss you, do I?" Jack shook his head.

"No, 'course not." He returned the favour and soon they were making out against the counter, just as Lureen came back into the room.

"Get a room, you two," she said to them, looking both exasperated and amused. "Can't you go five minutes without going at each other?"

"We're still newlyweds," Jack told her, hanging onto Ennis's shoulders as he felt Ennis's arms squeeze his waist. "Well...more or less. That's our excuse, anyway." He kissed Ennis again and they let go of each other, knowing that Lureen was laughing to herself. Some things never changed.

* * *

Ennis and Jack were nervous throughout the day, preparing to ask Lureen their request. Luckily, Lureen wanted to go shopping so they left her to it, while they stayed at home and went over what they were going to say. They knew it wouldn't be easy, but Jack had a good feeling that she would accept.

Lureen could tell that something was on their minds; she knew them very well by now and was sure that they would ask her in their own time. She had to wonder what was going on; she'd never seen them this nervous.

When Lureen came back she found them preparing dinner together and had to smile at how well they worked together. She would always remember those few days when Ennis and Jack had broken up, and how hurt Jack had been. She was very glad that they were back together; they were just better that way.

"Careful, you don't wanna burn it," Ennis was saying. Jack gave him a look.

"I've never burnt anything in my life," he retorted, drawing a smirk from his partner.

"You keep telling yourself that, bud," he replied. Lureen smiled at their banter, putting her bags down.

"Hey, guys," she greeted them, and they smiled over at her.

"Hey. You get everything you wanted?" Jack asked her, and she nodded.

"Yeah, I think so. I'm gonna put all of this in my room...how long until dinner?"

"Um...about half an hour," Jack replied, and she nodded before grabbing the bags and heading off. Jack watched her go, feeling more nervous than ever.

"We've gotta do it today, Ennis. At dinner...I can't hold it off any longer..." he said, and Ennis came up to him. He slid his arms around Jack's waist from behind and gave him a squeeze.

"I know, darlin'. We'll just have to get through it. Worst thing that can happen is her saying no...and if she does, then we'll just have to deal with it. We'll think of something else."

Jack nodded, covering Ennis's arms with his own. "Yeah. We'll have a kid one way or another."

At last, it was time for dinner and they were setting everything down on the table, Ennis and Jack exchanging glances while Lureen pretended not to notice. When they were all finally sat down, they ate for a few minutes until Jack couldn't take it any longer.

"Um..." he started, looking at Ennis. "Lureen?"

"Yeah?" she asked. "I can tell that something's on your mind...what's going on with you guys? You've been acting weird all day."

Jack looked sheepish. "Yeah...there's something we wanted to talk to you about. Never could hide anything from you, could I?" She shook her head. "Um..."

"Lureen," Ennis started, seeing that Jack was struggling. "Me and Jack...we've been talking about having a kid together, some way."

Her face split into a wide grin. "Oh, guys...that's incredible! Congratulations."

They smiled back at her. "Yeah, we figured it was a good time. We've only been married for a few months, but it would've been longer if we'd been allowed to do it back in California." Jack shrugged. "So we agreed it would be a good idea."

Lureen nodded. "Well, that's great. Is there anything I can do to help with that?" They glanced at each other.

"Actually, there is," Ennis replied. "We, um...we've decided to go with artificial insemination. Obviously, I'm gonna be the biological dad because of Jack's HIV. So all we need is someone to be the mother, and..."

She saw the nervous glances they were giving her, and it soon added up. "Oh," she replied, seeing what they were asking. "I, um...right..."

"We know it's a lot to ask," Jack told her. "And we've spoken to our lawyer; he helped us understand how it would all work if you say yes."

"It would mean you giving up the baby to us once it's born," Ennis said quietly. "And giving up your parental rights. We know that'd be hard for you, so...we understand if you can't do it."

"And we'll give you whatever you need," Jack added. "You can be as involved as you want, I promise."

She nodded. "Well, um...that is a lot to think about. I mean, I wanted to have kids one day, but I always figured they'd be mine, you know? I've gotta say, I never expected this." She looked thoughtful for a moment. "Can you give me some time to think it over?" she asked, and they nodded.

"Yeah, of course we can. There's no rush," Jack told her. She nodded and they returned to dinner, all three of them thinking. Lureen was mulling over her choice; she wasn't seeing anybody right now and could afford to take time off nearer the birth. Ennis and Jack wanted to have a family and they had asked her out of trust. They had considered her the best candidate for the mother of their baby, and she had to admit that she was humbled by their request.

They didn't speak much for the remainder of the meal, but when Ennis and Jack were clearing the dishes away she came up to them. "I wanna do it," she said to them, and they looked surprised. "I wanna help you guys have a baby. I know it won't be easy, but...I'm sure."

Jack grinned. "Lureen...thank you..." He hugged her tightly, now even more grateful to have her in his life. "God, thank you..." Ennis hugged her too and they smiled at each other; they would be creating a family together.

"Tell you what...you guys wanna go for a drink and celebrate?" she asked, and they nodded. "I've got loads of questions and it would be good to get started on this, right?"

"Yeah, sure," Jack replied. He grasped her hand. "We're really grateful about this, Lu. I hope we can work out all the details easily enough."

With their decision made, the three of them were already starting to look forward to it. They would make a family that involved the three of them, and they knew the child would be loved.

* * *

There was a bar near where Ennis and Jack lived, so they took Lureen there after they'd finished clearing up. She wouldn't be able to drink once she got pregnant, and they figured that she might as well make the most of it.

Both of them knew that Lureen would have a lot of questions about what they were going to do, and they were happy to give her as much information as she needed; what they were asking her to do was a huge thing that would change her life.

They sat down in a booth in the corner with their drinks; Ennis and Jack had brought along the notes they had made from talking with their lawyer for her benefit. It was simply the easiest way.

"Okay..." Jack started as they sat down. "Well, obviously this could take some time; more than just the nine months of pregnancy. I mean, you might not get pregnant the first time we try; it could take more than one try."

She nodded. "Fair enough. How would we do it?"

"Well, um...I would help Ennis make his donation," Jack replied, grinning widely. Ennis rolled his eyes. "He'd jerk off into a cup or something, then you would somehow...you know." He shifted uncomfortably; that was definitely not his area. Lureen nodded.

"Okay...that shouldn't be too hard. Then hopefully I would get pregnant, right?"

"That's the theory. Like I said, it could take more than one try. It might be hard on you if it doesn't happen the first time. You might...I dunno...feel like you're letting us down. But we won't think that." He smiled at her, trying to be reassuring.

"Alright," she replied, looking over the notes. "What about the costs?"

This was the part that Jack had been dreading. "Well, we asked our doctor. If we do it all ourselves away from any clinics, then it won't cost so much. But still, we'd have to pay you. It'll be around four thousand dollars. My mom said she'll help if we need her to; she can give us half. We just wanted to know what you thought. Maybe we could pay you in instalments or something?"

"Of course," she replied, nodding. She knew that Ennis and Jack were doing well but were not rich. "Sure, you can pay me the rest when you can; it's no problem. And I've got my own money anyway; I can take care of myself."

Ennis and Jack both breathed a sigh of relief; everything would work out. "Again...thank you, Lureen," Jack said to her. "So...when you get pregnant, we'll give you half from my mom. And then we'll pay you some every month until the birth. I think...that's just over two hundred dollars a month, right? We can have it transferred to your bank account."

Lureen nodded. "Great. Was there anything else?"

"Um, yeah...the parental rights. Obviously, you'd have to sign them over to me after the birth," Jack told her. "I would then adopt the baby and we would be its parents." He took her hand. "But you can have as much contact as you want."

"Right," Ennis added. "You can have an input on the name, how we decorate the nursery, even where the kid goes to school and college, one day. You'll be the baby's mother even though we're gonna raise it. We'll make sure that he or she knows who you are and why you don't live with us."

Lureen smiled at them both; they were being very accommodating. "Guys...I can't think of two better parents for a baby than you. I'm glad that you're so willing to give me so much access, and I accept it. I think we'll be a great team...and I can't wait to do this." She sighed. "Well...better make the most of this," she added, raising her glass. "To us and our new family," she said, and they joined her toast.

They got back about an hour later, all three of them tired after this eventful day. They had a few slices of toast together in front of the TV and then headed to bed.

"Get some sleep; we've got a lot to do. We need to call our doctor and lawyer and make appointments for you to come and see them. Maybe you should call yours too," Jack said to Lureen outside her bedroom door.

"Right. I'm glad I can do this for you, Jack. You know I used to worry about you and wondered if you were happy. Before you met Ennis, I mean. You were alone and just needed someone who would love you as you are. When you came to San Francisco, I felt protective of you. So when you started seeing Ennis and I could see how happy you were, I knew it would be okay."

"Even though we broke up for a few days?" he asked her, smiling slightly; the memories didn't pain him so much now. She nodded.

"That was hard for all of us. But you got back together and stuck together. So when you guys decided to move here, I knew you'd be just fine; I knew he would take care of you." She smiled at him. "I'm really happy for you, Jack. Both of you. And that's why I want to do this for you. I just want to make you guys happy." She kissed his cheek and went into her room, leaving him with plenty to think about. He really was very lucky to have Ennis.

He entered their own room to find Ennis waiting for him, clearly naked under the covers. "Hmm...you look like you're wanting something," Jack said to him as he undressed. He could see Ennis's eyes roaming his body and knew that he was in for it tonight. "You sure you wanna with Lureen here?"

"She'll probably try listening in...but I don't care," Ennis replied as Jack got into bed. "Just got you...right where I want you."

Jack grinned and leaned in, pausing before their lips met. "Same here, baby."


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5**

_August 23rd, 2012_

Two days after Lureen's arrival, Ennis and Jack took her to meet with their doctor and lawyer. They had spoken at length about how everything would be handled and had come to an agreement that suited all of them; this was bound to make it easier.

The day before, they had received their template contract from Peter and gone over it with Lureen; she had agreed with everything so now they could sign it. All three of them were looking forward to doing this.

"Okay," Peter said as they sat down in his office. "You've agreed to carry their child, and upon the birth you will sign over your parental rights to Jack," he said to Lureen, who nodded. "However, it has been agreed between you that you don't have to return home right away; you can stay as long as you need to until you're ready to leave the baby."

"Yeah," Jack replied; it was the easiest solution for all of them. They didn't want Lureen to feel like she was being pushed out by them.

"And it says here that you will have a say in the name of the child as well, and also in where they are educated. During the pregnancy, Ennis and Jack will attend all scans that you go to and offer their support whenever you need it. It has been agreed that Jack's mother will pay two thousand dollars, half of the fees that you are entitled to, and that they will pay the rest in instalments over the nine months."

Lureen nodded. "Yep, I think that's everything," she replied, and Peter handed over a pen, pushing the contract towards them.

"If everything is to your agreement, Miss Newsome, then you should sign here." He indicated where she should sign and she glanced at her friends, happy that she could do this for them. She signed her name and handed the contract to them so they could do the same.

"Okay then, now what should we do?" Jack asked, and Peter cleared his throat.

"Well, it's out of my hands now. You're ready to get started on this, so I say you should go and see your doctor right away." They nodded and stood up, full of anticipation now that things had started. They all shook his hand and left, starting to head for their doctor's office.

"Who knew that having a baby would involve so much paperwork?" Lureen mused as she glanced over the contract again.

"Well, we wanted to make sure that you're happy with everything," Jack told her, giving her a nudge. He was holding Ennis's hand tightly, starting to get excited about this now that everything was agreed. She smiled at them.

"At least you won't have any trouble with the money," she pointed out. "I bet you were worried about that."

Jack nodded. "Yeah...didn't think we could do it on our own and if we had to pay you in full right away." He shrugged. "We might have had to wait, but...I'm glad we don't."

They reached their doctor's office and were soon able to see him. "We got the contract all signed," Jack informed him, and he nodded.

"Good. Now, the next step is preparing Ennis and Lureen for the conception of the child. The first thing we need to do is some tests. Ennis, as the partner of someone with HIV you would need to be tested for this before we can do anything. I personally am certain that you two are careful, but it's standard procedure." Jack tried not to panic at this; he and Ennis were always so careful even in their most passionate moments. Surely he hadn't infected him.

"Okay, and what about Lureen?" Ennis asked, and John looked at her.

"Well, you would need to take a fertility test to make sure you are capable of having a child. This would need to be done in a fertility clinic, but it makes no difference whether it's here or in California as long as you have your doctor informed of it. You can have it done here before you leave and have your results given to you over the phone if you're back home when they arrive."

"Alright," Lureen agreed, nodding. "So if Ennis is negative and I'm fertile, then we can get started?"

"That's right," John told her. "In both cases, it could take a few days for your results to come through, maybe even longer. So in the meantime, you have to at least consider alternative options if something is wrong."

They all nodded, but were all hoping that it wouldn't come to that. Lureen had set her heart on doing this for her friends and would feel very guilty if she was unable to carry a baby or if anything happened to it during the pregnancy.

"So...Lureen, if you don't mind being tested here I can arrange for that. There are some open slots this Saturday if that suits. And Ennis, you can be tested on the same day if you wish."

"I don't leave until Saturday evening," Lureen informed him. "So...can we do it in the morning?"

"Yes, of course," John replied. "I'll call you when I have a slot booked for you. For now, I would advise you to go home and try to relax. I know that all of this is a lot to take in, but you all need to get some rest. Leave it with me and just try to enjoy yourselves."

They thanked him and left, out into the bright sunshine. "Well, that was easier than I thought it would be," Jack said, looking around. "Now what? You guys hungry?" The three of them headed for a nearby café and were looking forward to having a break. "You okay?" he asked Lureen, and she nodded.

"Yeah...just thinking about that test. I hope everything's okay with me, and that there's no problems."

Jack wanted to tell her that he was sure everything would be okay, but he too was starting to worry.

* * *

After lunch, the three of them decided to walk around for a while and go shopping. They headed into a bookstore and Lureen couldn't help but look at the baby books on sale. There were a number of books on pregnancy and she picked one up, flicking through and looking at the photos.

"Guys, you've gotta look at this," she said to them, and they came over to see what she was looking at.

"Oh...look at that," Jack said softly, grasping Ennis's arm. "They're something else, aren't they?"

"Sure are," Ennis agreed, and he was starting to look forward to being a father. He was still wondering whether or not to tell his parents what was going on; he felt as if they should know about their future grandchild but he still couldn't forgive them for how they had treated Jack. They had actually asked Ennis to consider leaving him, which neither of them had forgotten.

"You know, I think I'm gonna buy this," Lureen said, looking through it. "It's got all these tips about being pregnant...could be useful. I know there's a long way to go yet, but..."

"Don't worry about it," Jack said to her. "I'm sure it'll be okay." Ennis knew that Jack was trying to convince himself as well as her, but didn't say anything. He too was hoping that their tests would carry the results they were hoping for.

He and Jack looked around some more while Lureen paid for the book and then left, wondering where to go now. Ennis was enjoying living here; it was very different from San Francisco and he hadn't really expected that. He had worried about how Jack would cope with living here considering what had happened to him, and it might not have been possible without their previous trips here. He would never forget that walk in the park where Jack had taken him to the spot and how he had been able to comfort Jack.

Jack felt Ennis squeeze his hand and looked at him. "What's up?" he asked as he saw the pensive look on his husband's face. Ennis shook his head.

"Just...thinking about us living here. I didn't think it might ever happen, with everything that you went through."

"I know...I surprised myself, to be honest. When we broke up I even thought about coming back here by myself. It would've been really hard to do that without you, and I'm glad I didn't have to."

"Me too. Just wish it hadn't taken you being sick to get us back together and knock some sense into me," Ennis said quietly; he would never forgive himself for that. If Jack had died that night, he might have died thinking that Ennis didn't want him anymore and that thought terrified Ennis. As a result, he had resolved to tell and show Jack every day how much he loved him.

"Don't think about it," Jack told him softly, squeezing his arm. "It's over and done with now, okay?"

Lureen heard everything they were saying but decided not to speak, knowing that this would be an ongoing issue for them. Ennis would never stop feeling guilty and Jack would never stop telling him not to blame himself; there wasn't much else they could do when this topic came up, but she knew that it wouldn't cause problems for them. They were past all of that now.

They did some more shopping for a few hours and then returned home, Lureen having found some more books to look through. She was trying not to get too excited about it just yet in case something was wrong, but she couldn't help it. And while she was aware that it would not be easy for her to hand the baby over, she could at least be certain that Ennis and Jack would be great parents. She couldn't imagine two people more ready for this than them.

When they got home, she noticed them sat closely together on the sofa, watching TV while she read. It was very clear just how strong their bond was, and she liked watching how they interacted with each other. She found it quite inspiring to see just how much they loved each other, and knew that the baby would grow up in a loving family.

Jack was resting his head on Ennis's shoulder and stroking his hand with his thumb, knowing that Ennis could do with the reassurance that he was well loved. He knew that they could never truly resolve the issue of their brief separation and what it had taken to get them back together, but he was used to that now. All he could do was make sure Ennis knew they wouldn't have that problem ever again.

When Lureen went to the bathroom, Jack took the opportunity to kiss Ennis full on the mouth, drawing a surprised sound from him. "Mmm, what was that about?" he asked, looking a little dazed. Jack smiled.

"Just wanted to remind you how much I love you," he replied, nuzzling Ennis's nose with his own. "And I didn't want Lureen smirking at me while I did it. Please, Ennis...don't go beating yourself up over what happened; it's been a long time and we've been through so much since then. When you get like this, it hurts me to see you suffer. I know you don't like hurting me, so just cut it out, okay? I'm not going anywhere now, promise."

He kissed Ennis again and resumed his position, shifting even closer to him. Ennis kissed the top of Jack's head and sighed. "I'm trying, bud. It just gets to me that I was such an idiot and that I ever let you go. I was a real coward to do that, and..." He was cut off by Jack's hand on his mouth and relented, knowing that Jack didn't want him feeling like this. He nodded and kissed Jack's palm in apology. They didn't need to say anything; they knew each other well enough by now.

* * *

That night, Ennis and Jack were in bed and facing each other, talking about the day and everything that had happened. They were happy that everything was sorted out and were very much looking forward to the next step.

"Just hope everything goes okay with those tests," Jack said, running a finger along Ennis's arm. Ennis cupped his cheek.

"I'm sure it'll be fine, darlin'," he replied in a soft voice. He stroked Jack's skin gently, eyes roaming over the face he knew and loved. "You wanna take your mind off it for a while?" he asked, and Jack grinned; he knew what Ennis was asking.

"Sure..." They leaned in and kissed, just lightly pressing their lips together. Sometimes they liked to take things slowly, so that they could relax and enjoy every second of it. It was the perfect way to wind down after a long and busy day.

Ennis found himself moving closer to Jack, pressing their crotches together and hearing a soft moan escape from Jack. "Ennis..." he breathed, eyes darker than usual. "I..."

"What d'you want?" Ennis asked softly, nuzzling their faces together. "Tell me..."

"Want you inside me," he whispered. That was the position they usually had sex in; sometimes Jack would be on top and they both loved it, but this was their favourite position. Jack always enjoyed having Ennis inside him, making him feel safe and loved like nobody else ever could. He trusted Ennis while in such a vulnerable position and knew that Ennis would never hurt him. "Want you...right there..."

Ennis nodded and rolled on top of him, spreading Jack's legs apart and settling into position. He had to admit that he liked being here, knowing that Jack trusted him enough to allow such access to his body. He liked being on top not because of control, but because he liked making Jack feel good.

He kissed Jack deeper this time, pushing his tongue into Jack's mouth and caressing his chest at the same time. He felt Jack sigh into his mouth and broke away, smiling slightly. "Gonna make you feel good," he murmured, and Jack grinned breathlessly. Ennis grabbed the lube and two rubbers, preparing them both so that they would remain safe. He marvelled at how they could remember to do this even when they were yearning for each other and usually unable to think of anything else.

When they were both ready, he lifted Jack's legs up and wrapped them around his waist. Jack locked his ankles together and they shifted against each other until Ennis was pressing against the dark entrance. "You ready?" Jack nodded and bit his lip when he felt Ennis pushing into him, the familiar warmth washing over him.

"Oh God..." he breathed, head falling back to the pillow. "Every time...feels so damn good..."

Ennis smiled and nuzzled his neck as he pushed further in until he was there. Jack could feel the throbbing inside him and he welcomed the slight pain that came with it; the pleasure was always worth this. He allowed Ennis to lace their fingers together on the pillow and gazed up at his husband, who always knew how to make this moment both romantic and sexual. "I love you," he said suddenly, and Ennis smiled.

"Back at you, bud." He slowly started moving, pulling out a little bit before pushing back in and watching Jack's face. After a few thrusts, Jack's eyes fell shut and his mouth opened in bliss; Ennis had never seen anything so beautiful. He buried his face in Jack's neck and kissed the glowing skin as he moved, feeling Jack take every inch of him and hearing soft moans coming from him. He didn't like to think of causing Jack any amount of pain, but Jack had told him that it was a good kind of pain that he welcomed. Besides, he knew from experience that it would all be worth it.

As they moved together, Ennis let go of Jack's hands and instead slid his own underneath Jack, holding him close in an embrace. Jack returned it and raised his hips to meet every thrust, loving the slow pace that Ennis was taking because it felt more like making love. He gulped for air as he started trembling, knowing that it wouldn't be long. "Oh God," he groaned, feeling Ennis push deeper and harder to get them there. "Fuck...oh God, fuck me..."

Ennis raised his head and kissed him deeply just as he climaxed, shaking violently and bucking underneath him. Ennis wasn't far behind, gritting his teeth as he came and gasping as he finished. He collapsed onto Jack, breathing heavily and seeing stars. "Oh...Jack..."

"Yeah," Jack replied, burying his nose in the dampened curls and inhaling Ennis's scent. "I know, baby." He felt Ennis pull out of him and relax, sighing with contentment. "Mmm...well, you were right. You did make me feel good...really good." He heard a soft laugh coming from Ennis and smiled, hugging him tightly. "You, uh...you wanna take these off?" Ennis nodded and they removed the rubbers together. They cleaned themselves up and got comfortable, Jack now resting his head on Ennis's chest. Ennis lay on his back and wrapped an arm around Jack, rubbing his shoulder.

"I reckon we've managed to wind down after today," he said, and Jack nodded.

"Yeah...damn. Tell you what...I think every time is our best. We just keep getting better every time we do it."

"Reckon we do. Guess we really are meant for each other...I never doubted that, but you know what I mean," Ennis told him, and Jack kissed his chest.

"I do. And just think...we've got so many years of our lives ahead of us. All those nights just waiting for us. We're spending our lives together, and...I can't imagine spending my life with anyone else."

Ennis kissed his dark hair. "Me neither, bud. I think we've got some good times coming." He blushed. "I mean...damn it." He felt Jack laughing against him and gave up, knowing that he couldn't hold back when Jack was this happy.

* * *

_August 25th, 2012_

The morning before Lureen was due to leave, she had a fertility test at the local clinic to make sure that she was capable of having a baby. As far as she knew everything was okay, but she'd never attempted to get pregnant before so she didn't know.

While she was busy with that, Jack went with Ennis to the HIV clinic as moral support, hoping that everything would be okay with him. They sat holding hands as they waited to be called in, both of them aware that if something went wrong then they would have to choose another option.

"If that happens, then what do we do?" Jack asked, looking at his partner. Ennis thought for a moment.

"I reckon the only way is adoption. But you heard Peter; gay couples aren't at the top of the list and it could take years before someone picks us." He looked at Jack sadly. "Sure wish it wasn't like that."

"Well...we're only almost thirty," Jack reasoned. "If it takes a few years then it might not be the worst thing. Lots of people have kids in their thirties once they've settled down. But...I don't like the idea of waiting so long. And we've got no idea when someone might pick us, so it's not like we can really prepare for it. And what if someone never picks us?"

Ennis squeezed his hand. "Tell you what...we won't think about that right now. You never know; it might be alright. We can't go panicking, Jack...we'll just make ourselves feel worse."

Jack nodded and took a deep breath. "Yeah." He looked at his watch. "You reckon Lureen might be done yet? I don't know how long those tests take."

"No idea. Anyway, you told her to text you, right? She'll let us know when she's done." They were called in and sat down, being greeted by the doctor.

"So, is this just a routine check?" he asked as he prepared the needle. Ennis shook his head.

"Not really. We're looking to have a kid with a friend with me as the dad, so..."

"Ah, I see. And this is your husband?" he asked, seeing their matching rings.

"Yep. I'm positive, so obviously we need to make sure that he isn't before we go about doing this insemination thing," Jack informed him. The doctor nodded.

"Right. Well, it would be standard procedure anyway even if you were single." They both nodded.

"How long until we get the results?" Ennis asked. "When he got it, his results came back in two weeks..."

"It can take that long, but these days it can usually be detected faster than that so it might only be less than a week. We'll give you a call when the results are in and we can either give them to you over the phone or you can come in." He paused. "However, if we ask you to come in, that tends to mean bad news. It's definitely the hardest part of this job, having to tell people something like that."

"I can see why," Jack agreed; having experience of what it was like to live with the virus, he didn't think he would ever be able to do this kind of job. He couldn't imagine having to tell people that they had it, knowing how much it could change a life.

Ennis was then injected with the needle, wincing slightly as his blood was extracted. Jack grinned and nudged him. "Hey, come on. I thought you were tougher than that." Ennis gave him a look.

"I've never been good with needles," he replied, and he was given a piece of cotton wool to place over the puncture.

"Well, that's that. Like I said, we'll call when we have the results," the doctor told them. They left the office and Jack checked his phone; there was no message from Lureen yet so she was still being tested.

"You wanna head over there, see if she's done?" Ennis nodded and they headed for the fertility clinic. They had discussed Ennis having such a test done, but their doctor had informed them that there wasn't much point until they were sure of his HIV status. If he was fine then they would do so; they just had to wait now.

When they got there, they found that Lureen was just finishing and ready to leave. There were a few more hours until she had to get to the airport, so they all decided to have lunch together in the city one last time.

"So now all we can do is wait," Jack said as they sat down. "No idea how long it might take. Could be a couple of weeks."

"Well, at least we've got time to prepare," Lureen pointed out. "And at least if everything is okay you won't have to wait years for it to happen."

"Yeah...just don't like all this waiting," he replied. "Part of me wishes I was a woman right now."

"Then you guys wouldn't be together," she pointed out. "Ennis is gay, remember?" Ennis nodded at her statement.

"Yep...wouldn't really work."

"You know what I mean...that I could carry your baby myself. Lureen, I'm really grateful that you're doing this for us, but...you know? I wish we could do it by ourselves."

"I know," she replied gently, covering his hand with hers. "But this is how things are and we just have to deal with that. I'm fully prepared to do this for you guys, and I want to. I think we all know that we can't put things off all the time...you never know what's gonna happen." Jack nodded, thinking of the night when he'd been taken to hospital. What if he hadn't? He'd planned on returning here by himself and he might never have seen Ennis again.

"You cold?" Ennis asked when he noticed Jack shiver. Jack shook his head.

"No...just thinking of what might have happened if I hadn't been in hospital. We might not..." Ennis didn't say anything; there was nothing they could say about that time in their lives. But he curled his fingers around Jack's and squeezed his hand.

* * *

Later that afternoon, they took Lureen to the airport and bid her goodbye. They were sad to see her go but she would be back soon enough; as soon as they knew the results of the tests they could move on to the next stage. Jack spoke to his mother about their plans over the phone and he could tell that she was looking forward to being a grandmother. Even though she would not be related to the baby by blood, it would still be her grandchild due to Jack's marriage to Ennis, and that was all they needed to know.

When she'd left, Ennis and Jack retired to their apartment and looked forward to an evening in. They started making dinner together, occasionally nudging each other as they worked and grinning. They had always enjoyed doing things like this ever since the start of their relationship; they liked the domestic feeling.

"So, looks like things are going well," Jack commented as they saw to the food. Ennis nodded.

"Yeah, guess so. You really think everything's gonna be okay with the tests?" he asked, looking over at his partner. Jack took his hand.

"I hope so, bud." He paused. "But even if it isn't...we'll figure it out. I'm sure there's a way for us." Ennis smiled at him and nodded.

"Yeah. I do want us to have a kid somehow, darlin'. But if we have to adopt...it wouldn't be the worst thing, right?"

"No, not really. There's bound to be a lot of kids out there who need a home...but we know it's a long shot for guys like us." He felt Ennis squeeze his hand and they let go, returning to their work.

Over dinner, they decided not to talk about the potential setbacks of what they were doing. That was a conversation for when the results came back; for now, they just had to try and look forward to the possibility of them having a baby. It was certainly something that they both wanted, and that was the most important thing.

"So, how's work?" Ennis asked. Jack nodded.

"Yep, going good. There's this young girl who got infected by her boyfriend...the doctor in charge told me about her and that she needs someone to talk to, so...I've been giving her some tips on how to deal with it."

Ennis smiled at him; he was very proud of how well Jack was doing. They had come so far in the last few years and he could remember when Jack had worked at an electrical store. He'd been so unhappy while working there and had had to quit because of it. Ennis knew that he was so much happier now and it made him happy.

"That's a good thing for you to do, darlin'. I just wish you'd had someone to talk to when you got infected...might have made it easier, you know?"

Jack nodded. "I know, but...I had you, in the end. You were always there for me, right?"

"Yeah, of course. But I wasn't positive, and I'm probably not now. You really should've spoken to someone back then, you know. Someone who could've helped..."

"I know I should have...but I just couldn't cope. I was traumatised by what had happened and my dad had disowned me. I felt really alone, Ennis...until I met you. Then I felt like I really had someone to take care of me, for the first time since it happened." He looked into Ennis's eyes. "You were the first person in my life who...wanted to be with me despite what I have. I'll never forget that, bud."

Ennis smiled back. "I'm glad I could help you, Jack. I saw that you were trying to just live your life but you were struggling because you felt alone. I wanted to be there for you."

They finished their dinner and then headed over to the sofa; Jack switched the TV on and they got comfortable, him resting against Ennis. This was one of his favourite times of the day, when they could just relax and be together. They would need this if they did have a baby; it would undoubtedly take up most of their free time and they would have to take these moments wherever they could. But they knew it would all be worth it as they saw the child grow up; Jack's mother had said the same thing.

Ennis laced their fingers together on his knee, liking how Jack's hand felt against his own. Jack truly was his other half and there was never any doubt about that. He used his free hand to lift Jack's face to his, smiling. He leaned in and kissed Jack softly on the lips, hearing a sigh escape from his partner. They were still so much in love and that would never change; he knew that. He'd heard that having a child could put strain on relationships, but he was certain that this would never happen.

"What was that about?" Jack murmured, eyes sparkling in the light from the TV. Ennis shrugged.

"Just felt like kissing you. Always enjoyed that, you know." He nuzzled their noses together and felt Jack slide an arm around his waist. They hugged and kissed for a good few minutes, not paying attention to the TV but only to each other. Jack laughed when Ennis kissed his neck.

"You know that drives me crazy," he said, enjoying it nevertheless. Ennis grinned.

"I know...I like making you squirm." He relented and chose to simply gaze down into Jack's eyes; they were a deep blue that went straight to his heart. "I love you so much, you know..."

Jack nodded. "I know, bud. I really do...and you know how I feel about you, Ennis." He rested his head back to Ennis's shoulder and sighed. "Mmm...this is good, but...you wanna go to bed yet?" Ennis laughed at the implication and switched the TV off.

"Sounds good to me, darlin'." He grabbed Jack's hand and led him through the apartment to their bedroom.


	6. Chapter 6

_Author's notes_

_Please don't throw things at me for this one! *gets ready to duck*_

* * *

**Chapter 6**

_August 28th, 2012_

Ennis and Jack were spending their day off relaxing in the park and enjoying the sunshine. They hadn't heard anything from Lureen yet and Ennis didn't have his test results, so there wasn't much else for them to do but wait. Neither of them particularly liked this, but they had no choice.

There were other couples in the park, some of them of the same sex, and a lot of people were lying on large beach towels on the grass near a fountain. Ennis and Jack were doing the same thing, soaking up the sun and enjoying the picnic they'd brought with them.

Jack stretched and sat up, removing his sunglasses. "Sure is a nice day, huh?" There were a lot of people here but it wasn't too noisy.

"Yep," Ennis agreed, not opening his eyes. "Hey...come back here..." Jack grinned and ay back down, allowing Ennis to drape an arm around his shoulders. Ennis kissed his forehead. "Imagine us bringing a kid here...they could go in the play area one day and we could help them until they're big enough to do it themselves. And we could buy them ice cream and watch them splash about in the fountain...that'd be great, wouldn't it?"

Jack smiled at the thought, images building up in his head. Some part of him had always wanted to be a father, and now he would be. "It really would...we'll be parents, Ennis. One way or another...we'll do it. And I can't wait."

Ennis opened his eyes, looking over at Jack. "Me neither...just think about everything we've got to look forward to. We're really gonna do this, Jack."

"Hope everything's gonna be okay with the tests," Jack said, chewing his lip. "I know we keep talking about that, but I can't help it."

"Shh..." Ennis soothed, rubbing the back of his head. "Don't think on it, bud. Let's just try and enjoy today, okay?"

Just then, Ennis's phone rang and he went to answer it. "Hello?"

"Mr Del Mar? This is Dr Newall from the HIV clinic. Your test results are in if you would like to know them."

Ennis sat up, his heart beating quickly. "Oh, okay. Well...?" He knew that Jack was looking at him, wondering what was going on and if it was something bad.

"You're negative, Mr Del Mar. Absolutely fine," the doctor told him, and he breathed a sigh of relief. That was one obstacle out of the way.

"Okay...thank you very much." He hung up and turned to Jack. "That was the HIV clinic; I'm negative."

Jack grinned widely. "Oh, baby...that's great!" He hugged Ennis tightly, feeling relieved himself that Ennis hadn't been infected, and not only for their current plans. When they pulled apart he kissed Ennis full on the mouth, his heart lifting. "Okay, now we need to hear from Lureen and then you should have your own fertility test, right?"

"Yep, looks like that." Ennis sighed. "Sure am glad that's out of the way now..." He smiled. "But even if I were positive and we couldn't have a baby this way...it wouldn't matter in the long run. We would try and adopt, and I would sure as hell still love you."

Jack smiled softly at him, nuzzling their noses together. "I know, Ennis...I really do. Gotta say...I'm relieved about it. Don't know what I would've done if you'd been positive. Doesn't bear thinking about."

Ennis was about to reply but then Jack's phone buzzed. "Wonder if that's Lureen?" he asked, and Jack picked it up. Sure enough, it was a message from her.

"It is," he replied, opening the text.

_Fertility results back, everything okay and ready._

Jack grinned and showed Ennis the text. "Look at this..." Ennis smiled back.

"Okay...so now we just need to get me a fertility test. Then...we can start doing this." Jack nodded.

"We sure can, bud. We can book your test soon enough, I reckon. You can call them later."

Ennis nodded and they lay back down again, once more relaxing in the sun. He couldn't believe it; two pieces of good news in a short amount of time and now they were almost ready to get started. He was especially happy about the HIV results; if he had been positive then it would have caused them both so much pain. That was one less thing to worry about now.

After a while, they got up and started walking through the park. It wasn't as busy as normal with it being a weekday, but there were still other people around. They walked along the path where Jack had been attacked and paused. Jack was looking right at the spot where it had happened. He didn't feel any pain, or anything at all. He had long since accepted what had happened to him and it didn't affect him too much anymore. Besides, he had Ennis beside him and his attacker was behind bars; nothing could hurt him now.

"You okay?" Ennis asked, and he nodded. He felt safe with Ennis there, holding his hand and just being _there_ with him. That meant so much to him.

"Yeah, I'm fine. Just...strange to be here. Knowing that it happened to me, I...I used to be so scared of being here and you know that. But now...I don't really feel anything. We got married in this park, and that was the happiest day of my life. Can't really feel bad about this place now."

Ennis smiled at him, but then he looked over at the spot. He didn't like to think of Jack being so scared and vulnerable like that, but it was a long time ago and he was okay now. Still, he hoped that Jack's attacker rotted in that prison cell for a long time.

"You're alright now, darlin'," he said softly, squeezing Jack's hand. "He's not gonna hurt you ever again, and nobody else will, either." Jack nodded and allowed Ennis to pull him away gently, leaving behind the memories.

* * *

That afternoon, Ennis and Jack went to see their doctor so that they could decide what to do next. They were both very glad that Ennis's HIV results were negative and that Lureen was fertile; now they were almost ready for the next step.

They were sat waiting in John's office, hands linked between them. Ennis was deep in thought, but Jack was feeling restless. He couldn't wait to get started on this and he hoped it wouldn't be too difficult.

"So..." he started, hoping to ease the nerves that he knew Ennis must be feeling. "Maybe Lureen can come back over here soon, once you've had your fertility test. Then who knows...we might have luck on our first try."

Ennis nodded. Yeah, maybe. I'm real nervous, Jack. Don't wanna end up like my folks..." Jack squeezed his fingers.

"You won't, bud. I know that sure as anything else. You'll do just fine." John entered the office and greeted them.

"Well, I hear that the tests went well," he said to them as he sat down. "Ennis, your HIV test was negative and Lureen seems to be okay; that means we're almost ready to start this. You will need to have your own fertility test before we can, though. Just to be certain. But I'm sure everything will be fine."

"So if his test is okay, then what do we do?" Jack asked, anticipation running through him.

"Then...Ennis can start producing sperm and we can attempt to inseminate Lureen. With what you'll be paying her, you initially have three tries to get her pregnant. However, if Lureen agrees to more, then you might have to pay her extra. But hopefully it won't come to that. Most women who do this are successful within the first three tries."

"So he's gotta keep jerking off until we get it right," Jack said thoughtfully, giving Ennis a wicked grin. "I can help him with that," he added, and Ennis rolled his eyes. John chuckled.

"I'm sure you can, Jack. It might actually be a good thing, to make it as...enjoyable as possible. For you to help Ennis, it would help you to feel more involved. That's a very important thing."

Jack nodded, seeing the sense he was making. He did want to help as much as possible, and wanted to be a part of it even though nothing biological was coming from him. "Fair enough. So, three tries. Does she have to be here for the insemination?"

"It's the only way. Sperm doesn't last long outside of the body as it is, even in natural conception. That's why, when a man and a woman have sex, usually only one sperm makes it through to the unfertilised eggs. They have a very short lifespan. So there's no way it could be delivered across the country. She would have to be here for it but then she can fly home as soon as the conception is completed. When she gets close to the third trimester, she would have to come over here until the baby is born; she can't fly past that date."

"Well, she's coming back next week, on the fourth. So maybe if we can get Ennis tested today then we should get the results in time," Jack suggested.

"Absolutely; I think we can do that. Just let me make a call to the clinic and I'll see if I can get him a time slot." John left the room, leaving them alone. Ennis smirked over at Jack.

"You're gonna enjoy helping me, aren't you?" he asked. Jack grinned.

"I sure as hell am. But he was right; it would help me to feel more involved. I do need that, you know." He took Ennis's hand again. "So...we need to sort it out with Lureen. When you jerk off, it won't last long. She needs to be here before we even try, so...maybe she could come straight to our place from the airport, and while we're waiting we can try to...you know." His smile widened. "Then, I dunno...we're gonna need a syringe or something. Could Lureen do it by herself?"

"Don't know...we need to have a woman helping her, I reckon. Maybe we could get a nurse to come out and help her."

With this agreed, Jack went to call Lureen and told her of their plans. She told him that she would let him know as soon as she got a flight, so they could be ready for her arrival. He bumped into John on the way back, who agreed to have a nurse dispatched to the apartment for Lureen's arrival. It was happening very quickly but he'd half-expected that.

He and John returned to the office, where the doctor informed them that Ennis had a fertility test booked in two hours.

"Remember, guys...once Lureen is inseminated there's no going back. You won't be able to change your minds."

They looked at each other, exchanging soft smiles. "We won't be doing that," Jack told him. "Just think...this time next week, Lureen could be pregnant with our baby. That's...scary, but exciting."

"Sure is. And you were right, Jack...I'm not like my parents. I won't go turning into them." Ennis smiled at him, very grateful for the support. Jack kissed his hand.

"I'll make sure you don't," he replied sincerely. "Right...so we've got a couple of hours. Are we done here?" he asked John, who nodded.

"Yes, for now. Let me know how the results are when you get them, and we'll go from there. When Lureen has her flight and you know what time she'll be at your apartment, let me know and I'll have a nurse ready to help her."

They thanked him and left the office, deciding to go for a walk before heading for the clinic. They returned to the park and talked about the events of the next few days. All they had to do was this one test, and then they could move forward to the most important part.

* * *

_September 4th, 2012_

The following Tuesday, Ennis and Jack were at home. Lureen's flight would be landing in about an hour and the nurse was ready to be called out as soon as they needed her, so now they had to actually produce the sperm. Ennis's fertility results were fine, so now they could continue.

As Jack had said, he was very much looking forward to helping Ennis with this. They were lying on their bed fully clothed, kissing softly; they both wanted to savour this moment; it would change everything in their lives if Lureen got pregnant and they both knew it. There was a plastic cup with a lid on Ennis's bedside table, ready for what they produced.

Jack lowered his head and kissed Ennis's neck. "Mmm...love kissing you..." Ennis had his eyes closed, enjoying the attention. They had decided that Jack would simply jerk Ennis off to do this; he needed to keep a clear head so that they could do this properly and he was sure that Ennis would pay him back later.

"Love it when you kiss me," Ennis replied, grinning. Their lips met again and Jack's hand went wandering, roaming over Ennis's chest. With expert skill, he undid the shirt buttons with one hand and caressed the strong muscles he found, nuzzling Ennis's neck.

"Just think...we're making a baby," he murmured, the thought running through his head. "Amazing, huh?"

"Sure is," Ennis agreed, feeling himself harden at what Jack was doing to him. "Just glad you can help with it, even if you can't carry our kid."

Jack kissed his jaw and started rubbing his lower stomach. "I know...but it's still a damn good thing to do." He broke away and looked into Ennis's eyes, quickly undoing Ennis's jeans and slipping a hand inside. "Look what I found..."

"Yep, you found it..." Ennis bucked when he felt Jack's warm hand surround him, groaning slightly. "Push my jeans down...don't wanna make a mess..." Jack did as he was asked and felt himself growing hard.

"Shit...got a problem here. How can we...? I've gotta make sure you get it into the cup..."

Ennis thought for a moment. "Put a pair of rubbers on us...jerk me off into one and we'll put it in the cup later. Then you can still get off and don't have to worry about it." Jack nodded and did so, putting the condoms on them both and resuming his kissing of Ennis's jaw. "God, I love you..."

"I love you too...so much," Jack whispered, taking hold of Ennis once more and moving his hand up and down. "Baby...come for me..."

Ennis groaned, trembling under Jack's touch. "Jack..." Part of him wished that they could have full sex and still do this, but that would have to wait until later. Right now, they had a job to do but were still finding it enjoyable. "Oh God..."

Jack kept his hand moving, picking up the pace. With his free hand, he was jerking himself off at the same time; there was no way he could watch Ennis like this without being affected himself. Ennis gave a strangled yell and climaxed, accidentally head-butting Jack as he did so. Jack had already come by then and was just catching his breath when he felt the pain in his forehead, falling to his side of the bed.

Ennis quickly grabbed the cup and managed to make the transfer from the condom, glad that they had achieved what they had wanted. He looked over at Jack, who was clearly dazed. Ennis bit back a grin and removed the rubber from him, cleaning them both up and then leaning over his partner. "Jack?"

He lightly slapped Jack's face to help him focus. Jack blinked. "What happened?" he asked as he sat up. Ennis took his hand.

"Looks like I head-butted you when I came...your face was too close to mine. Sure am sorry, darlin'..." he said apologetically. Jack started laughing.

"I said come for me, not give me head," he quipped, and Ennis joined his laughter. He kissed Jack's forehead gently, seeing the red mark there. "Don't worry about it, bud. Did you get it into the cup?"

Ennis took the cup and held it in front of Jack. "It's right there. How long until Lureen gets here?" Jack was about to answer when his phone buzzed; it was Lureen.

_Just got off plane, be there in about half an hour. _Jack grinned.

"She'll be here in half an hour. We should call John about getting the nurse here." He grinned breathlessly. "Just think...she could get pregnant today..."

"I know," Ennis replied, pulling Jack close to him and nuzzling their faces together. "It's really scary, but...it'll be great too. And even though you're not related to the kid, you'll still be every bit its father as me, okay? Hope you know that."

Jack relaxed in Ennis's arms, the pain in his forehead lessening. "I do, Ennis. We're gonna be parents, all three of us. The kid will need its mother, and Lureen would still have the right to be there for the baby. It's not fair otherwise. Especially if it's a girl...talking about periods and stuff...we can't really do that."

"Bet we could teach her all about guys, though," Ennis replied, grinning. "Unless she turns out like us, you know?"

"Yeah, maybe," Jack agreed, nodding against Ennis's chest. "She could be, you never know. People might say...that we corrupted her or something, making her think that she's gay as well. But we know that it's completely a random thing; just the way someone's born."

"Sure is. Everything that gay people go through, even these days...nobody would choose to be that way, I reckon. I love you, Jack...and I don't regret any of this, but...I still wouldn't have chosen to be gay. Hope you know what I mean..."

Jack kissed his chest. "I really do, baby. I wouldn't choose it either, but I'm glad that we're gay. We wouldn't be together otherwise and I might not be as happy as I am."

"Me neither, darlin'."

* * *

Sure enough, Lureen arrived at the apartment half an hour later. She was extremely nervous about getting pregnant, but she knew that Ennis and Jack would take care of her as long as she needed them to. She was just happy that she could help them to have a family, and hoped that it all worked out.

When she knocked on the door of the apartment, Jack opened it and she immediately saw the red mark on his forehead. "What happened to you?"

"He head-butted me when we were trying to get his sperm in the cup," Jack replied, grinning slightly. She raised her eyebrows.

"Well, whatever works for you. Didn't realise you liked it so rough, Jack," she told him, smirking. He rolled his eyes.

"It was an accident. My face was too close to his, and he couldn't help it. But we managed to get some in the cup, so we're ready for you."

"Is the nurse here?" Lureen asked as she entered the apartment. Jack nodded.

"She's just using the bathroom." Ennis was in the kitchen, and he smiled at Lureen when he saw her.

"Hey," he called to her, and she hugged him tightly. She would always be grateful for how much he took care of Jack and how good he was to him.

"Good to be back. I'm nervous, but looking forward to it," she admitted, and Ennis nodded.

"That makes three of us. You want something to eat or drink?" he offered, and she opted for water; she could be about to get pregnant and didn't want to risk coffee. She sat down with Jack while they waited, and she could tell just how nervous he was.

"You okay?" she asked, and he nodded.

"Yeah, I'm fine. Just...all this is kind of nerve-wracking. We're gonna be parents...and even if you don't get pregnant today it could still happen another day. Hope it happens in those three tries we've got."

Lureen touched his shoulder. "Jack, I'm prepared to do this however many times it takes. I know there's the money issue if you have to pay me more, but I'm not going to just give up on you guys. Alright?" He nodded gratefully and took Ennis's hand when he came over. Ennis kissed his cheek.

"It'll be fine, bud." The nurse, who was named Claire, came out of the bathroom and was introduced to Lureen; they figured it would be the best solution to have a nurse help Lureen with the insemination; neither Ennis nor Jack felt comfortable about doing that themselves.

"So, are we ready?" Claire asked, looking around at them all. They nodded and Lureen stood up. She was holding the cup in her hand and eyeing it warily. At first, she had felt strange about having a child with her best friend, and the husband of her other best friend, but the circumstances were such that there was no real problem with it. It wasn't as if they had to conceive the natural way; neither of them would have gone down that road.

Lureen went into the bathroom with the nurse, leaving Ennis and Jack alone. Ennis leaned in and Jack met his lips, enjoying the warmth that ran through him every time they kissed. "We could have a baby soon," he whispered when they broke apart. Ennis nuzzled his nose.

"We sure could...can't believe it. You ready to be a dad?" he asked, and Jack nodded.

"Ready as I'll ever be, I reckon. Been thinking about my dad the past few days...wish he could be here to be part of all this, like my mom." His eyes lowered and Ennis cupped his cheek.

"I know, darlin'. I'm sure that he's proud of you, for everything you've done."

"Thing is...he's gone. But before he died we managed to make up. Your folks are still alive but you won't talk to each other. What if something happens to one of them and you didn't make up? You sure you don't wanna try talking to them?" Jack asked, looking up into his eyes. Ennis didn't know what to say.

"I don't know...I still can't forgive them for the way they treated you. It's not easy when I think about them insulting you the way they did."

"I just don't want you to regret it," Jack murmured, holding Ennis's hand tightly. "I don't wanna see you going through that, ever. I would have if I hadn't made the effort with my dad."

"He was willing to talk to you," Ennis reminded him. "I don't think they'll talk to me unless I leave you...so I guess we're never talking."

Jack knew it was a lost cause; there was too much bad blood between Ennis and his parents and there was nothing they could do about that.

Ten minutes later, Lureen and Claire emerged from the bathroom to find them embracing on the sofa, and Lureen cleared her throat. "Sorry to interrupt you guys...but it's done."

They looked over at her and disentangled themselves, standing up. Jack was grinning. "So...now we've just gotta wait?"

"That's right," Claire replied, nodding. "In these circumstances it could take a while. And Lureen...when you do take a test don't be disheartened if it says you're not pregnant. For one thing, it might take longer than you think and for another, you've got two more tries."

"Okay," she replied, running a hand over her stomach thoughtfully. Jack smiled at her.

"Well, um...thank you for helping us," he said to Claire, shaking her hand. Lureen and Ennis followed suit and she left. Jack sighed.

"Right, um...you guys wanna do anything or...?" he asked, looking at them. Lureen shrugged.

"I just feel like watching TV and relaxing now. Probably a good thing." He nodded and resumed his place next to Ennis, switching the TV on. Ennis's hand found his and held on, squeezing gently and bringing a smile to his face. They could have a baby soon and he couldn't believe how lucky he was.

* * *

That night, Ennis and Jack were kissing in bed and yearning to connect with one another. They were very happy that things were starting to happen for them now and they wanted to show each other just how much. There was no better way as far as they knew; this was everything they needed.

Lureen was sleeping in the next room and they were trying to keep their voices down, but it was hard when all they wanted to do was scream each other's name in ecstasy and show the world how much they loved each other.

"Oh God," Jack breathed, rubbing his hips against Ennis's. He so wanted to be inside Ennis right now; there was no other way when he felt like this. "Ennis...God I love you..."

"Me too," Ennis groaned, who was yearning for Jack to fill him up and fuck him senseless. He needed to have Jack inside him. "Jack...fuck..."

"Ennis...wanna be inside you...wanna fuck you so hard you won't walk properly for a week," Jack whispered in his ear. Ennis grew even harder.

"Fuck me," he murmured back, happy that Jack wanted the same thing. "Jack...need you...right there..." He held Jack's hand and guided it to his entrance, indicating what he wanted. "Fuck me..."

Jack kissed him hard, grabbing his hands and pinning them above his head. He did love being in control now and then, knowing that even though Ennis was at his mercy, there was always the trust between them. Ennis knew he could let go and be vulnerable because Jack would take care of him.

When Ennis was about to plead with Jack to enter him, Jack grabbed a condom and put it on; they only needed one when he was on top because Ennis didn't have the virus. He smoothed the lube over himself and then spread Ennis's legs further apart, loving how all of this was for him; he knew what it meant for Ennis to give himself over like this and would always be humbled by that.

Ennis's eyes fell shut when he felt Jack pushing in, groaning slightly at the pain that always came first. Jack knew to take it slowly and allow him to get used to it, and soon enough he was sliding all the way in. He looked down into Ennis's face as their bodies connected, tightly pressed together. "Feel good?" he whispered, and Ennis opened his eyes.

"Always does," he replied, allowing Jack to hold his hands above his head. Jack was taking the advantage and he loved it; sometimes he needed to be the one who was taken care of and there was nobody else he trusted like this. "Jack...come on..."

Jack lowered his head and started thrusting, pushing in deep every time and nuzzling his lover's neck as he did so. "Ennis...you're beautiful," he whispered. Ennis tried to shake his head but could barely move when Jack was making him feel so good.

"Never thought that about myself...only about you," he choked out, letting his head fall to the side. Jack kissed his skin as he moved faster, knowing exactly how to make it good for both of them.

"You are, baby. Most beautiful thing I've ever seen...especially when we're doing this. Feeling good?"

"Yeah..." Ennis squeezed Jack's fingers tightly as he felt his orgasm loom closer. Jack knew exactly what he liked and how to move to make it the best he could. He groaned when he felt Jack's warm hand on him, teasing out beads of pre-come and continuing to kiss his neck and jaw.

"Come on, baby...come for me..." he whispered in Ennis's ear. Ennis was straining for release, needing to come as it built up inside him. He was painfully hard by now and was close to yelling out with frustration.

"Oh God!" he cried out, muscles clamping as he finally climaxed. Jack felt sticky fluid hit his chest and he grinned breathlessly, now moving relentlessly and thrusting into Ennis quickly.

Then something happened that neither of them was aware of. Just before Jack came, the condom split without either of them noticing in their haze of lust. He kept moving without realising the danger, and Ennis kept spurring him on until he was finally there.

His eyes flew open when he realised that Jack was coming _inside_ him, which wasn't supposed to happen. He heard Jack whispering to himself, probably a few curse words as he too realised what was happening, but he couldn't stop himself.

Jack collapsed on top of him, shaking all over with fear. They hadn't realised that the condom had split, probably from the sheer force of his thrusts, and now it was too late. He might have infected Ennis now.

They didn't speak for several moments, until Ennis decided they needed to say something. "Jack? Did you...?"

"The condom broke," came a fearful whisper in his ear. "I didn't even realise...I came inside you and now...you know the risks of that."

Ennis felt Jack pulling out of him and they looked down; it had definitely split open. "Shit..." Ennis looked up at Jack. They both remembered the first time this had happened; it had led to their brief break-up. But the second time had been relatively okay for them; they had soon gotten over that for Ennis hadn't been infected. But now...they were both scared. "Jack, look at me."

Jack did so, pain in his eyes. "I'm sorry...what if I...?" Ennis cupped his cheeks.

"It's okay, darlin'. It was an accident. These things happen...don't go panicking, okay? I'll take a test tomorrow, I promise. Before we try again with Lureen. Jack, come on..."

Jack gulped and removed the condom, lying down next to Ennis and allowing himself to be held. "If you're...positive...I'm so sorry..." Ennis held him close, feeling scared himself but knowing that Jack was terrified of what he might have done.

"Shh...it's okay. Get some sleep; we'll figure this out tomorrow." Jack nodded but remained awake for a while, petrified of what was going to happen now.


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter 7**

_September 5th, 2012_

Neither Ennis nor Jack got much sleep the night before, mostly because of Jack panicking about what he'd done. Ennis suspected that he feared them breaking up because of it, like the first time it had happened. All he could do was try to reassure Jack that it wasn't going to happen.

Some part of him had always known that Jack could infect him, but after Jack's stay in hospital he had learned to accept that. The medical advancements meant that it might be more bearable now to live with the virus, so at least he might not get very sick. Jack was okay most of the time and could live a fairly normal life.

When they woke up the next morning, Ennis spent a few minutes holding Jack close to him and trying to calm him. If he was infected, he would need Jack to be there for him but he wondered if he could with all the guilt he felt. He hoped that Jack would soon calm down and be able to focus again.

"It's okay," he said softly as he stroked Jack's cheek. "I know you feel bad, but we can't go panicking yet. I might be alright."

Jack nodded, taking deep breaths. "I know, but...I can't help it. Infecting you was always the thing I was most scared of, ever since we got together. The one thing that I never wanted to happen. When I think about how I got infected..."

"Hey," Ennis cut him off, placing a finger over Jack's mouth. "Don't go thinking like that, Jack. This is completely different and you know it."

Jack relented and pressed his forehead to Ennis's, trying to draw strength from him. "I know."

When Lureen entered the kitchen that morning, she could immediately tell that something was wrong. Ennis and Jack were quiet; Jack seemed especially cut up about something. They hadn't been fighting; it wasn't that kind of silence. She could tell that they weren't angry at each other, not with the way that Ennis kept rubbing Jack's shoulder or squeezing his hand.

"Guys? What's going on?" she asked, looking between them. "What's happened?"

Jack tried to speak but couldn't, instead turning away. Ennis put an arm around him. "Something happened last night...and now he's panicking." Lureen sat at the island, looking concerned. Ennis sighed. "Well, we were...in bed, and..." His cheeks reddened slightly at discussing his sex life but he carried on. "The condom split and...there's a chance that he..."

"Oh my God," she whispered, eyes travelling to Jack. Now it made sense to her why he looked so upset. "Jack..." She got up and hugged him, hoping that he wouldn't take this too hard. "So what now?"

"Well...we can't make any more sperm yet, not until I've had a HIV test. So unless you're pregnant now..."

Lureen shook her head. "I don't wanna take a test yet. If I do now and it turns out I'm not pregnant, that'll just make it harder on all of us with the waiting. I'd rather know after you have your test."

"Alright," Ennis agreed, seeing the sense she was making. They had to bear in mind how Jack was feeling right now, and Ennis didn't want him to beat himself up over this. He took Jack's hand. "You okay, bud?"

Jack nodded, trying to smile. "Trying to be. Can't help worrying, though. And I agree that she shouldn't take a test until after we know how things are with you. The waiting's gonna be hard enough as it is."

The three of them made breakfast together and sat down, attempting to have a normal morning. Lureen prayed to whoever might be listening that she was pregnant, especially if Ennis had become infected. If so, then they would never be able to have a biological baby and that would leave them with adoption as their only choice. She knew that they were open to that, but would prefer for at least one of them to have a genetic link to the child.

"Okay, so I'll call John after breakfast and let him know that I need an appointment at the clinic. We should do it as soon as possible, before Lureen has to go. Hopefully we'll get the results before she leaves and can make a decision together, whatever happens."

Lureen nodded. "I agree. It always helps to have a plan, so we'll just have to somehow get through this. But I promise that you guys aren't going to have to deal with this by yourselves. I've always been there for you and I am now."

They smiled back at her, grateful to have her by their side at a time like this. Both of them often wished that she lived closer to them so that they could spend more time together.

After breakfast, Ennis went to call their doctor while Jack and Lureen washed the dishes. When they were alone, Lureen held Jack in front of her by the shoulders and gave him a piercing look.

"Jack, I know you're feeling bad about it. But I reckon Ennis has it worse right now. If he is positive, he's going to need you there to help him get used to it. You guys knew all along that it could happen, so if it has then you need to deal with it." She thought for a moment. "Jack...please don't fall apart on him now. He's going to need you if he is infected. Pull yourself together, for him. If you don't stop moping, I'm gonna slap you." Then she smiled. "He's going to love you anyway no matter what, so just remember that."

Jack nodded and took a deep breath; she was right. He was feeling very guilty, but as Ennis's husband he had a duty to be there for him when needed, and he would do that because he wanted to. At the end of the day, they were always going to be together no matter what.

* * *

Jack tried to get through the morning at work, but it was hard to inspire people when he was feeling so low. He just wanted to go home and spend time alone with Ennis. He thought about what Lureen had said to him, and he knew he couldn't keep feeling sorry for himself like this. Ennis would need him if the results were positive.

Lureen went out shopping for the day while they worked, and Ennis had his HIV test during their lunch break. The pair of them met up in the park, where Jack felt the need to apologise to Ennis again. He knew that Ennis wasn't angry at him and wouldn't leave him over this, but he couldn't help it.

As soon as they met up, Jack found himself in Ennis's arms in a warm embrace. Ennis nuzzled his hair, knowing that it must have been hard for him to counsel others when this was happening.

"How did the test go?" Jack mumbled into his shoulder. Ennis shrugged.

"Same as last time, to be honest. John told me it really is best to wait before Lureen takes a test, then at least we'll know if it's worth making any more sperm for her." He pulled his face away but kept holding Jack. "Bet work was hard for you..."

Jack nodded, taking a deep breath. "Yeah. Ennis, I...I wanna say sorry again. I didn't want this..." He chewed his lip. "But Lureen told me this morning that I can't go moping around. If you're positive, you'll need me to help you. And I promised that if I ever did infect you, then I would help. So...even though this hurts a lot, I am gonna get over my guilt. But then...you might not even have it. Remember that scare we had a couple of years ago, the second one? I came inside you then and nothing happened. So maybe you'll be fine this time."

Ennis smiled back at him, glad that he was calming down. They walked over to a bench and sat down, opening the sandwiches that Ennis had brought. "Maybe I will be. But we'll cross that bridge when we come to it. Come on, you've gotta eat. I know you didn't eat a lot at breakfast."

Jack nudged him gently. "Remember the first time we shared sandwiches in a park? Back in San Francisco, after we first met but before our first date."

"Yep, I remember. I brought them with me, just like now. And you kissed me on the cheek afterwards. That was when I started to really like you, even though I hardly knew you."

"I know...I just looked at you and knew that you might be able to make me happy," Jack replied, smiling at him. "I was so alone when we met, and when I told you about me being positive I was sure that I would never see you again. But you said you wanted to see me again and look what happened."

"Yeah." Ennis pressed his lips to Jack's cheek, glad that he was cheering up. "Guess it was just meant to be for us, huh?" Jack nodded and looked around the area, thinking.

"Sure was. Ennis...if you're positive and Lureen isn't pregnant, then that means we can't have a kid that's related to either of us. So then...our only choice is adoption. I'm okay with that, but I keep thinking about what Peter told us...about gay people being way down on the list and how long it could take. Could we really cope with that?"

Ennis took his hand. "I reckon we could, so long as we stick together. We'll get through it, no matter what happens. We'll be fine, darlin'." Jack smiled and they finished their lunch. Ennis then pulled Jack close to him and kissed the top of his head. "Come on, just relax. We've got time before we have to go back to work."

"If you're positive, you think I should tell them?" Jack asked. "I mean, it's a real personal thing." Ennis nodded.

"I'd be fine with it. You've been honest with them so far; why stop now? They need to know what it's like to live with the virus, every part of it. And it might help them to understand why their partners can react badly to the news. If you don't wanna tell them, you don't have to. It's up to you, Jack..."

Jack closed his eyes, breathing deeply and sliding an arm over Ennis's stomach. "I know...guess I'll think it over. Just hoping I don't have to say anything."

"Me too. This is why I'll need you, Jack, if I'm positive. You'll have to help me get used to it. I'll admit that it scares me..."

Jack looked up at him, sorrow in his eyes. "I'm sorry," he murmured, but Ennis shushed him gently. He didn't need to hear an apology.

"Stop apologising. It's fine, really. It was always a risk for us, so I've been prepared for it for two years. When you were in hospital and I promised to stick with you, I knew then I had to accept that I could get infected. I did that, so...that's just it. But what I don't want is you beating yourself up over it if I am. Seeing you hurt...it hurts me. I love you so much, Jack...the kind of love that almost hurts because it's so strong. I don't know what I'd do without you."

Jack blinked the tears away at the sweet words and he kissed Ennis's hand. "I feel the same about you. We're soul mates, Ennis...can't ever be apart. I won't fall apart on you if you're positive...I know you'll need me."

They sat there for the remainder of their lunch break, embracing warmly and just enjoying the blissful moment. Soft kisses and whispered words were exchanged as they blocked out the rest of the world, only focusing on each other and their love. This would get them through the bad times that were sure to come.

* * *

The rest of the day passed as normally as it could under the circumstances, but Jack was very glad to be on his way home. He sat in the back of a cab as it drove him down to Brooklyn Heights; Ennis and Lureen were already back and making dinner. He knew that they would likely be talking about him and what had happened, but he didn't much care. They were concerned about him and he appreciated that, and he also knew that if Ennis was positive, he would have to get over his guilt and pull himself together.

His phone rang as they were crossing over into the area from Manhattan, and he saw it was his mother. He sighed and opened it up. "Hey, mom."

"Hi honey. Just wanted to know how things are going. You said that Lureen's there now, right? Have you guys...?" She trailed off, sounding hopeful. He knew she wanted to be a grandmother.

He took a deep breath. "Yeah, she's here. And yeah, we've had our first attempt. Don't know anything yet."

"Jack...what's wrong?" she asked when she noticed how unenthusiastic he seemed; it was very unlike him. "What's happened? Are you and Ennis fighting?"

"No, we're not. Everything's okay on that level. We haven't been fighting. But you're right...something happened. I don't know how much I'm comfortable to tell you, though. You're my mom."

"Honey, if it's about your sex life I won't get squeamish. All parents have to face the reality of their kids growing up one day. I know that you and Ennis sleep together; you're married. I honestly don't care if it's sensitive stuff; I'm here for you."

"Alright," he agreed, trying not to blush. "Well...last night, we were...in bed. And...something happened. The...the protection, it...it split. And I...well, you know." It wasn't the most eloquent sentence he'd ever formed, but he was squirming about discussing his sex life with his mother.

"Oh, Jack..." she sighed, knowing what he was getting at even if he couldn't say it. "So now you think Ennis might be infected?"

"Yeah. It happened and we didn't realise it until it was over. He took a HIV test earlier...could be a few days before we find out the results."

"Okay...what about Lureen? You don't know if she's pregnant yet?"

"No. We told her this morning, and she said she didn't want to take a test until we knew how things were with Ennis. She said that if she takes one now and she's not pregnant, then the waiting for his results will be a lot worse. So if he is positive and we get the results, then she'll take her test and we'll go from there. I'm hoping that we got it on the first try..."

"I'm sure you did, Jack. A lot of people do when they go down that road to have a baby. But you all need to prepare yourselves for what could happen. I bet you've been feeling guilty, haven't you?"

He could never get anything past her. "Yeah...don't really know what to do. I feel so guilty, mom. I could have given him this thing that'll change everything for the rest of his life. If I gave this to him...how are we ever supposed to have sex ever again?" he asked, voicing what he was really scared of. "What if he won't come near me if I did infect him? What if I can't move past it and enjoy being with him?"

"Jack, calm down. I'm sure none of that will happen even if you infected him. He loves you and you know it. The way he looks at you, honey...he's head over heels for you and would never leave you, not after everything that happened when you were in hospital. He promised to stand by you even if he got it. He married you, Jack...that's no small thing. He wouldn't have done that if he'd thought for even a second that he might leave if he got the virus from you. Please, have some faith in what you have. So many people, especially gay people, go through their lives unhappy because they either never met the right person or gave them up out of fear. I don't want you guys to go through that."

He nodded, glad for a wise word from this wonderful woman. "Mom, I...thank you. It really means a lot to me that I can talk to you about this stuff. Ennis still won't talk to his folks. I told him that he might regret that if something happened to them, but he's not budging. It's sweet that he's doing it because they insulted me, but..."

"I know, honey. But I'm afraid that if he's sticking to his guns there's not much you can do. It's his problem to sort out. I know that you two support each other and try to help each other, but I think he needs to work on this one by himself. The way they treated you...I know that must have hurt you but think; it probably hurt him a lot worse because he's their son. They're supposed to accept every decision he makes about his life, including who he chooses as his partner. They couldn't do that, even advised him to leave you. That would have left a deep wound inside him that only time and effort can heal."

Jack nodded, seeing that they were getting close to where he lived. "Thanks for all the advice, mom. I'm nearly home now, so...I better go."

"Alright, honey. Call me if you ever need to talk, and give my best to Ennis and Lureen. Let me know how things go with you guys, okay?"

"Yep, I will. Bye, mom."

"Bye." Jack hung up and sighed, looking forward to being home. The first thing he would do was kiss Ennis, even if Lureen was watching and smirking to herself. He knew that he couldn't fall apart if Ennis was now positive; his partner needed him and that was all there was to it.

* * *

_September 8th, 2012_

On Saturday, the three of them decided to spend the day at home until a phone call came. Ennis was just washing up after breakfast when his phone started ringing; Jack looked up from where he was reading, eyes wide. Every time it rang he thought it was the clinic wanting Ennis to come in; he knew what that tended to mean, given that he had been asked to come in when his HIV results were given.

"Hello?" Ennis asked when he picked it up.

"Mr Del Mar, this is Dr Newall from the HIV clinic again. I understand that you had to take another test a few days ago due to changing circumstances?"

"Yeah, that's right. There's a chance I might have become infected since my last test," he replied, glancing at Jack apologetically.

"Well...we need you to come in. Perhaps your partner should come in as well; he needs to hear this. Can you come in today?"

"Yeah, sure. We'll be there soon. Bye." He hung up and looked at Jack, whose heart was hammering in his chest. They had asked Ennis to come in, which either meant that there was a problem with the payment or it was bad news. Since they didn't have any real money issues, it had to be the latter.

"What...?" he asked warily. Ennis shook his head.

"They want me to come in today...you should come as well. Lureen...she'll have to stay here," he added, glancing at the bathroom door. Jack nodded, feeling miserable.

The wait at the clinic was unbearable for Jack; he was continuously worrying about having infected Ennis and what this would mean for them now. He didn't know what to do, but he kept hold of Ennis's hand as if it would take all the pain away.

Ennis was nervous about his results, but was strangely not panicking. He had long since resigned himself to the fact that it could happen, and he had accepted it. He'd had to because he'd wanted to be with Jack; this was all part and parcel of being with someone who was positive. He was sure that he would get through it, but only if Jack didn't fall apart. He could only remain strong if Jack did too.

When they were called in, they sat opposite Dr Newall who was giving them a grim look. He had been very pleasant towards both of them during their trips here, but now he looked like someone who hated to be the bearer of bad news.

"Well, Ennis...I'm afraid I have bad news. You said that the other night, the protection broke and that the virus may have been transmitted to you from Jack. I'm afraid you were right; you've contracted the HIV virus."

Ennis closed his eyes, taking in those words and breathing deeply as he digested them. He briefly wondered why he wasn't freaking out, but realised that there was nothing he could do about it now. He then looked over at Jack, who had tears in his eyes. Ennis wrapped an arm around his shoulders and Jack rubbed his back, trying to show him support even though he was very upset by this news.

"Alright," he said calmly, thinking this over. His life would never be the same again but they had to carry on for each other. "So what do I need to do?"

"Well, you're mostly okay right now, but you will need medication at some point so I advise you to get that sorted with your doctor as soon as possible. Perhaps also talk to a nutrition expert; we have one right here at the clinic and I'm sure she can answer any questions you have. Your experience in helping Jack will certainly help you now, but if you ever need to talk then perhaps seek out a counsellor."

Ennis nodded and he peered at Jack's face. "Bud?" he asked softly, nudging him gently. "You alright?"

Jack looked at him. "I should be asking you that...I don't get why I'm falling apart here..."

"Because you feel guilty," the doctor said to him. "I've seen it before. But I will tell you that you don't need to feel that way. It was an accident, Jack. You didn't do it on purpose and you didn't even know until it was too late."

Jack nodded, feeling Ennis's hand squeezing his. He couldn't break down now; he just couldn't. Ennis needed him and he just couldn't leave Ennis to deal with this by himself. "I'm trying...I really am. Guess we just have to deal with this."

Ennis kissed his hand, hoping that everything would be alright. "Is that everything? I think we need to get out of here." The doctor nodded so they left, heading out into the sunshine and fresh air. They looked at each other unsurely.

"Well...guess we should get home," Jack said, scuffing his feet. Ennis nodded and reached out to him.

"Come here." Jack went into his arms willingly, hugging him tightly as if he never wanted to let go.

"This is ridiculous...I should be comforting you," he mumbled into Ennis's shoulder. Ennis rubbed his back, completely understanding why he was feeling like this.

"I know, and when you've calmed down I'm sure you'll do that. But right now, you're feeling terrible about all this. Look, let's just go home and talk this whole thing out, alright?"

They pulled away slightly and Ennis kissed him, very softly. Jack gave him one back and rested their foreheads together, breathing deeply. "I love you."

"Love you too, darlin'," he replied, nuzzling his nose. "Come on, let's go home." They walked down the street together, still holding on to each other for support. Jack was fairly sure now that Ennis wasn't going to leave him over this, and he had to hold onto that thought to make himself feel better and get through this. Now they had to work together to make sure that this news didn't ruin their relationship.

* * *

When they finally arrived home, Lureen took one look at their faces and immediately understood. She would talk to them later; right now they needed to be alone. Ennis closed the door behind them and sighed.

"Well...I guess that's that," he said, looking around. "Um...you want something to drink or eat?" he offered, looking at his partner. Jack looked dejected, like he would never forgive himself for this.

"No, I'm alright," he replied, sitting on the sofa. Ennis walked through the apartment to the bedroom and picked up the box of condoms, knowing that there was no point in having them anymore; it wasn't as if they could make each other any worse now by having unprotected sex.

"Guess we don't need these anymore," he said to Jack when he came back out, giving a tentative smile and hoping that Jack would respond. Jack attempted to smile back but it didn't reach his eyes. Ennis put the box in the trash and came to sit with him. "Bud...talk to me."

Jack sighed. "I just...feel like I can't apologise enough. I've ruined your life..." Ennis made Jack look at him.

"Listen to me; you haven't done that at all. It won't be easy to adjust to all this, but I reckon I can do it. Jack...I can only get used to it if you're there to help me. Please, don't break down...you're stronger than this. I know you are."

Jack shook his head. "Only strong because of you. Now you're infected as well..." He gulped. "What if you get sick?"

Ennis caressed his cheek. "We'll just have to hope that doesn't happen. Jack...there's something you're not telling me here. Something's worrying you...what's wrong?" Jack sat back, looking up at the ceiling.

"I just keep thinking...that you're gonna leave me over this. If you get angry over what I did to you, or if it's too much for you to be with me after this...I just can't stop wondering if that's gonna happen."

"Jack, I'd never leave you over this," Ennis told him firmly. "I swear I wouldn't."

"You left me once and I didn't even infect you that time," Jack replied, looking away. Ennis decided to let that go; he knew why Jack was being like this.

"Darlin'...I know I did. I was a coward who thought it would never happen to me. But I've changed and you know it. Hey," he added, making Jack meet his eyes. "I'm not going anywhere. I need you to help me with this, just like you need me when it gets to you. We're supposed to support each other now."

Jack stood up, clenching his fists as he tried to keep calm. He couldn't understand Ennis's relaxed attitude over these events. "How can you be so...calm about this?" he asked incredulously, facing Ennis. "I've just given you a virus that can kill you, and even if it doesn't your life will never be the same again. How can you look at me after this? How can you not hate me for what I've done?"

Ennis was finally starting to understand why Jack had been so quiet lately. He looked Jack straight in the eye. "I can't hate you because I love you. I could never hate you even if I wanted to, because...I just can't do it. Yeah, you infected me and a lot of people would be angry about their partner doing that. Look...this was an accident and we both know it; this happened because we were having sex and were too...lost in each other to realise that the condom split. So that's how much we love each other, right there. We're oblivious to everything else." He stood up, facing his husband. "Jack...I'm looking you in the eye right now in spite of what's just happened. Does that not tell you anything?"

Jack seemed to deflate before him, his anger ebbing away. "But...why are you so...?"

Ennis shrugged. "We knew this could happen, right from the start. I left you that one time and it turned out to be the biggest mistake of my entire life. When Lureen called me to say that you were in the hospital, I...I knew then that if you died thinking I didn't want you, I would never have forgiven myself. I had to be by your side, to tell you that I love you if nothing else."

He stepped closer to Jack, who didn't protest. Ennis took Jack's hands in his own. "Darlin'...I told you that if being infected was destined to happen in my life, then I would prefer to get it from you than anyone else. At least then I would have someone I love by my side to help me. I stand by what I said then. And remember our vows? In sickness and in health? Sticking to that one, too." He cupped Jack's cheeks and brought their foreheads together. "Jack...come on. We're better than this, you and me. We're really strong together and I know we can handle this."

Jack looked into the warm brown eyes, and he finally believed what Ennis was telling him. He wasn't angry, he wasn't leaving and he wanted them to stick together. There was no way that Ennis would tell him these things if he had any doubts. He sighed and moved forward into Ennis's arms, allowing his husband to wrap him up close.

"I'm gonna try my best to help you," he promised, squeezing Ennis tightly. "Swear to God I am. Nobody should have to deal with this thing alone...especially not you. Gonna be right here helping you, baby."

Ennis smiled and kissed Jack's hair. "Thank you. Can't deny that I'm nervous, but it makes me feel better to know that I can rely on you." He pulled Jack's face away from his shoulder and kissed him, clearing Jack's mind of all the muddled thoughts and just allowing him to relax.

Lureen peeked out of her bedroom door, having heard every word. She smiled when she saw them kissing and silently closed the door again, confident that everything would be alright.


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter 8**

_September 10th, 2012_

By Monday, things had slightly improved. Ennis had started taking medication at their doctor's advice, and he and Jack were working through this change in their relationship. Jack finally appeared to have stopped blaming himself so much for infecting Ennis, which meant that there were no more dark clouds hovering above them.

As for Lureen, she had resigned herself to the fact that she couldn't put off taking a pregnancy test anymore. It had been two days since the diagnosis and they needed to know if she was pregnant. If not, then this would mean a major change in their plans. They would then have to attempt to adopt, which had its own set of obstacles.

After Ennis and Jack had come home and talked things over the other night, the three of them had spent the next few hours talking. Lureen promised them that she would always be there to help them, even if she couldn't carry their child. She'd been there for them in the past as their best friend, and she would do the same now; she didn't want them to suffer.

She was sat on the sofa during Ennis and Jack's lunch break; they sometimes came home for lunch together, especially if they had a guest. Jack came over to her and sat down, nudging her. "Hey."

Lureen smiled at him and put her magazine down. "Hey...you feeling okay?" He nodded.

"Yeah, I guess. You were right; I can't keep going around feeling sorry for myself anymore. It takes too much energy and it's not what he needs right now. I have to be there for him. So...thank you for telling me that the other day. I really don't know what we'd do without you," he said to her.

"Every gay man still needs a woman in his life," she pointed out. "Women make good best friends because we can talk and listen. You and Ennis love each other to bits, but you still need a female around to knock some sense into you."

Jack grinned. "True enough. Um...are you gonna take a test yet? It's been two days since he was diagnosed, and I don't wanna put pressure on you, but...we need to know what we're gonna do now."

Lureen sighed. "I know...I've been thinking about it. I bought one yesterday at the drugstore; keep looking at it but I couldn't pluck up the courage. What if it's negative? You guys won't be able to have a biological kid. How are you gonna react to that? You'll feel even worse than you did before, right? I know you, Jack...you'll feel guilty again, like you've deprived Ennis of the chance to have a child."

Jack would be a liar if he said that the thought hadn't crossed his mind; he had been concerned about how Ennis would feel about it. But he remembered the sweet words Ennis had said to him two days ago, and he felt certain that Ennis wouldn't be angry with him. "You know...before we got home that day, I might have felt like that. But after he spoke to me, which I know you were listening in on..." he added, smirking at her. "I reckon he wouldn't do that. He'd be disappointed, but...I think he'd come to terms with it. I don't think I've ever really seen him lose it. He's never lost his temper with me, ever. Never raised his voice or hit me, which you might expect 'cos we're both guys and we can get like that." He shrugged. "I don't think he'd get angry at me for it."

She nodded. "Alright. Guess I'd better go take the test and hope that you're right." She stood up, passing Ennis as she made her way to the bathroom. He wished her good luck and then went to sit with Jack, holding his hand.

"Hope this goes well," he said, and Jack nodded, resting his head on Ennis's shoulder. He was feeling better now but it wasn't always easy to stop blaming himself.

"Me too. It's gonna be hard for us to adopt. Would our HIV status be held against us?"

"I don't know. We'd have to be picked by someone who doesn't care about that; I reckon it would be in our file when we apply."

"Yeah..." Jack looked up at him, finally calm. "I love you." Ennis smiled and kissed him in response.

A few minutes passed, and they listened intently for anything that sounded like happiness on Lureen's part. But there was nothing and they knew it couldn't have taken much longer. They were just starting to worry when the door opened and she reappeared, looking disheartened.

"Guys...I'm so sorry," she said softly, holding the negative test in her hand. It was wrapped in a paper towel and she could barely look at it now. "I'm not pregnant..."

"Shit..." Jack stood up to hug her, whispering in her ear that it was alright. Ennis got up too and joined them. The three of them stood there in a group hug, trying to hold everything together and remain strong.

"What are we gonna do now?" Lureen asked quietly, wiping her eyes as they pulled apart. Ennis shook his head; they couldn't make decisions now while they were dealing with this latest setback.

"We'll talk about it later, after dinner. We'll decide something before you leave tomorrow." She nodded and went to sit on the sofa, leaving Ennis to embrace Jack. "I know what you're thinking, bud...but I'm not angry at you. I'm not going anywhere, I promise."

Jack held onto him, feeling guilty but knowing that Ennis didn't blame him. "I know, I really do...thanks, bud." Lureen was happy that they weren't going to fight about this, but she still felt as if she'd let them down. It was nobody's fault, just the way that the dice had rolled, and now they had to pick up the pieces and carry on. They would figure it all out, in time.

* * *

The day was fairly quiet for all three of them. Lureen decided to go out for some fresh air before dinner, which left Ennis and Jack alone. They ended up entwined in one of the armchairs, holding each other closely and whispering to each other. They weren't entirely sure what to do now.

"So...you think we should see about adoption?" Jack asked, looking up into his husband's eyes. "I mean...it could take a long time."

"I know. But it's our only option," Ennis reasoned, stroking his hair. "And you never know...someone could pick us sooner. We need a good, strong application; something that will show people we can be good parents despite all of this. I'm sure there are plenty of people who have brains when it comes to gay people, especially those with HIV." He was adjusting fairly well, much better than Jack did when he had been infected. But Jack reasoned with himself that he had been much younger then, and he didn't have anyone to talk to. At least he understood what Ennis was going through, and could help him when he didn't feel too guilty.

"Yeah, I guess. I...I know you probably wanted a kid of your own, and I'm sorry I took that chance away from you..." he lamented, looking away. Ennis kissed his cheek.

"Jack, come on...we've been over this. It was an accident and there's nothing we can do about it now. We've just got to try and carry on as best we can." He leaned in and captured Jack's lips, hoping to make him feel better. Jack melted into the kiss, loving how they were so wrapped up in one another. One of Ennis's legs was hooked around his waist as they sat together, and he had to admit that he was very comfortable.

The kiss soon turned heated as their tongues slid against each other, hands wandering to buttons. They hadn't had sex since that night; Jack had been too scared and Ennis was always respectful of his feelings. Maybe now was the right time; they both needed it.

Ennis lowered his hand and dipped it between Jack's legs, giving him a squeeze and finding that he was hard. Jack broke away and scrambled out of the chair as if he'd been branded, hands over his mouth. "Oh God..."

"Jack?" Ennis asked, standing up and hovering close. "Bud, what's wrong?" Jack shook his head and turned to face him, looking pained and worried.

"I'm sorry...I just...when you touched me, it made me think of that night and how I..." He looked away. "I just panicked...didn't mean to." Ennis sighed and put his hands on Jack's shoulders, hoping not to spook him.

"Darlin'...I'm the one who should be sorry. Taking it so far when I know you're still feeling like this. Didn't mean to scare you." Jack looked into his eyes.

"I will be able to do it again, maybe soon. But right now, I...I can't." Ennis nodded and kissed his forehead.

"Alright. That's fine, bud. You wanna try that again? We don't have to do anything you're not ready for."

Jack nodded, trusting Ennis to be respectful of how far he could go; Ennis always had been. They got back into the chair and wrapped around each other again, faces just inches apart.

"We'll take it slow," Ennis murmured to him. "And not just this. The first time we have sex again, and the adoption...we'll take it all slowly so that we can get back on track, alright?"

"Okay," Jack replied, watching as Ennis dropped his gaze to his lips. He tensed slightly when their lips met, but he soon relaxed when he remembered that nothing had to happen if he didn't deem himself ready. Ennis was careful to keep his hands above Jack's waist, gently caressing his stomach instead. He wished he could put his hands on Jack's ass and pull him closer, but he figured that would be too much right now. "Mmm..." Jack moaned softly, enjoying the new slow pace and appreciating what Ennis was doing for him.

"Love you," Ennis whispered in his ear when they broke apart. He planted a kiss to Jack's neck. "So much, darlin'..." He felt Jack growing hard against him but he knew he couldn't touch him, not yet. He himself was starting to feel aroused and bit his lip, moving his head away from Jack. "Guess we should slow down a moment," he observed, and Jack nodded.

They rested their foreheads together and breathed deeply, willing their arousals to go down. But this was very difficult when they were so attracted to each other and were used to doing this. They did have some experience in making out without turning it into sex, usually when they didn't have time. When they were okay again, they kissed once more and Jack tucked his head under Ennis's chin.

"This is good," he said quietly. Ennis rubbed his back, trying to give him as much comfort as possible under the circumstances.

"Just don't like to see you hurting," he murmured, glad that Jack was allowing such close contact even if they couldn't take it further. "And try not to worry, bud. Things are gonna work out, I'm sure."

Jack closed his eyes, breathing in Ennis's comforting scent. "I know. And you're right; we should take the whole thing slowly. The adoption, sex...I think it's the right way to go." Ennis kissed the top of his head.

"I love you, Jack...don't ever doubt that, okay?" Jack smiled up at him.

"I never have...and I don't doubt it now. I love you too, baby." Ennis smiled at the endearment and tucked Jack's head back down, liking how he could take care of him in such a way. He might be the one going through a major life change, but Jack was the one who needed reassurance right now. He was worrying about everything and Ennis didn't want that; he just wanted to make all the pain go away.

* * *

_September 11th, 2012_

Today was when Lureen had to leave and return to the East Coast. Jack was concerned about her leaving on a plane today of all days, but she assured him that she would be fine.

"I promise I'll call as soon as I get back," she told him as he helped her with her luggage. She would be taking a taxi from the apartment to JFK, which meant she would have to say goodbye here; Ennis and Jack needed as much time alone as possible right now. She had a suspicion that they hadn't had sex since that night and she hoped that they would get back on track soon. Everything had changed so much.

"Alright," Jack agreed, nodding to her. Ennis was making her a sandwich for the plane, which she was very grateful for. "Just...don't worry about us too much. We'll be alright."

Lureen nodded. "Am I allowed to tell Alma what's going on, or...?" she asked, looking over at Ennis. He and his ex were on fairly good terms, but they were never going to be the best of friends after everything. Still, he knew she got on well with Lureen and just wanted the best for them.

"I guess so," he replied. "As long as she doesn't say anything to my folks. I dunno what I wanna do about that yet. Not sure if I want them to know." Jack looked at him; he knew that Ennis wasn't ashamed of it, but was more worried about how they would treat Jack because of it. He knew that he didn't have to let them near Jack ever again, but if he decided to go and see them to tell them the news, then Jack would insist on coming with him for moral support. There would be no way out of it if he went over there to tell them.

"Well...I'll let her know but I'm sure she won't anyway," Lureen assured him, and he nodded. "Anyway...I just want you guys to know that even though I can't carry your baby, I'm always gonna be here for you no matter what. If there's anything you need help with, just tell me and I'll do whatever I can. Alright?" she told them, looking at them both. Jack stepped forward and hugged her tightly.

"I can't thank you enough for everything you've done," he murmured to her. "I consider Ennis to be my best friend now, but you're a close second. Like a sister, you know?"

She hugged him back, sharing a smile with Ennis over his shoulder. "And you two are like my brothers. For what it's worth...we would have made a great family."

"Yeah, we would. But you know..." he said as they broke apart. "If we do adopt, the baby's gonna need a female influence. I know my mom will be there for us, but...you're always welcome to visit whenever you want. Like an aunt or something." Lureen grinned.

"That sounds great." Ennis brought the sandwich over and she thanked him, hugging him too. "Take care of yourself, and him," she said to him, and he nodded.

"I will, you know I will."

"He understands that you're going through this big change, and I'm sure he'll be there for you when you need him to be," she continued. "But right now, he's very vulnerable. Don't do anything that might hurt him, okay? That includes taking him to your parents."

"I won't, not until he's better," Ennis promised her, knowing that she was right. A string of verbal abuse from his parents was not what Jack needed right now. They had to get through this before they could do anything else.

She let go of him just as they heard a car horn outside; her taxi was here. "Guess I'd better go," she said, looking around. Ennis offered to help her with her luggage but she said she was fine; she wanted him to stay with Jack. He relented and they walked her to the door, watching as she walked along the corridor to the elevator.

"Gonna miss her a whole lot," Jack murmured, feeling comforted by Ennis's arms around his waist. Ennis kissed the back of his neck.

"I know, me too. Come on..." He led Jack back inside, where they immediately headed for the sofa. They flopped down together and Ennis put an arm around Jack as he flipped on the TV. "You feeling any better?"

Jack shrugged. "Don't really know...maybe, I guess. I'm glad we're taking things slowly...reckon I might be up for more than just kissing soon..." He smiled up at Ennis, who felt hopeful but knew not to press the issue.

"Alright. Just let me know, bud. We'll go at whatever pace you're okay with; no rush at all. I love you too much to push you into it." He kissed Jack on the cheek and they faced the TV, their hands finding each other and holding on. Jack liked the gentle pressure of Ennis's fingers entwined with his own; reminding him that Ennis was there for him. He knew he had to get himself back on track because Ennis would need his help, and he silently promised to do so.

"You okay?" Ennis asked when he felt Jack squeezing his hand. Jack nodded.

"Yeah...just glad you're here. Dunno what I'd do if you said you couldn't do this anymore..." Ennis pressed his lips to Jack's knuckles.

"Hush, don't go thinking like that. It's never gonna happen so you don't need to worry about it. We're so much stronger together, Jack...can't go messing that up now. We need each other, you know?"

Jack nodded and sighed in contentment, glad that he had Ennis by his side. Ennis was the only one who had never truly run from him, ever. There had been a brief break-up, but he understood now why that had happened. Ennis was sticking by his side and they were going to get through this, one way or another.

* * *

_September 12th, 2012_

On Wednesday, Ennis and Jack had both decided to take one of their sick days off together. Neither of them had ever skived off since starting work here, so their bosses were happy to give them the day. Both felt as if they needed to spend some alone time together due to the stress of what they were going through.

After breakfast, they took their meds together with Jack advising Ennis; they were both on antivirals but Jack was worried about Ennis taking Videx; that had been the one to land him in hospital. They would simply have to try and take care of each other.

The pair of them then went out onto their balcony for a while; it wasn't very large but they had enough room for a couple of chairs and a small table. They had a great view of Manhattan and the river from here.

"Glad we could take this day together," Jack murmured, looking up into the sky. Ennis nodded.

"Yeah, me too. I know we need this, Jack...just us on our own for a day. Things have kinda been full-on since the diagnosis. We can't let it take over, though." He took Jack's hand across the gap between their chairs. "Today it's just about us. There anything you wanna do?"

Jack shrugged, looking over the view. "I don't know...not really. I wanna stay here, if that's alright with you. Just...can't face leaving the apartment right now."

"Alright," Ennis agreed. Truth be told, he just wanted them to stay here too. He wanted to hold Jack in his arms for hours until he felt alright again. "Maybe we could watch a movie later or something?" he suggested, and Jack nodded.

"Yeah, that'd be good." Trying to act as though everything was going back to normal, Jack got up out of his chair and sat on the arm of Ennis's, looking down at him nervously. Ennis slid his arm around Jack's waist and squeezed him, giving him a reassuring smile. Feeling more confident, Jack slipped down and sat on Ennis's lap, in an echo of their position yesterday. "I, um...I've been thinking. Was thinking about it all night, actually."

Ennis held onto him, waiting patiently. Whatever Jack wanted or needed, he would give it to him.

"I...I think tonight, I might be ready to...you know. Have sex," he said in a rush, his cheeks going pink. "Um...I mean, if you want..." Ennis kissed him on the cheek.

"I think that's fine, darlin'. You know I'd never turn you away, but...I wanna know that you're sure about it. Don't want you to go regretting it..."

Jack shook his head. "I don't think I will, really. I need you, Ennis. It's the only way I can think of to get rid of all this stress. It always worked before..." Ennis smiled at him.

"Yeah, it did. Okay, we can at least give it a shot. We'll have dinner, watch a movie, and then..." His voice trailed off, his smile meeting his eyes. Jack couldn't help but grin at the idea of sex with the man he loved, and he ducked his head. Ennis saw his smile and hugged him closer, glad that Jack seemed to be getting back to normal.

"There's just one thing I've gotta ask," Jack murmured into his shoulder. Ennis rubbed his back.

"Yeah, bud?"

"Could you be on top? I'm really not ready yet to do that myself...still too scared for that." He bit his lip and felt Ennis hold him tighter.

"Sure, darlin'. You know I don't mind that...and I sure as hell don't wanna see you suffer." He pulled away and kissed Jack gently on the mouth, practically feeling the tension melt away from his partner.

They were lost in their own little world, just focusing on each other. They had both always loved times like this, when they could ignore everything else. Ennis was more certain than ever now that Jack would be alright and that they would get through this.

After about an hour, they went back inside and chose to just watch TV all day; it was better than doing anything stressful right now. They ended up talking about their childhoods, and Ennis could just see Jack running around and giving his parents headaches as a youngster. Jack had been so innocent back then, completely unaware of how his life would turn out. He should have been able to believe that he would always be healthy; his attacker had taken that away from him.

"I'm sorry you've had to go through so much," Ennis told him, arm squeezing his partner. Jack smiled sadly at him.

"Not your fault...you didn't even know me then. Just...one of those things you have to get used to, I guess." He shook his head, knowing that he should be focusing on Ennis. "So, um...are you okay? I mean...how're you feeling?"

Ennis shrugged. "Don't feel sick. Guess it's just...there. I'm okay with what's happened, Jack. Really. We didn't see it coming and it was an accident. That's just how it is." Jack nodded and pressed his lips to Ennis's cheek.

"Alright. I am trying...and I'm sure we'll be alright."

They made dinner together, which resulted in them occasionally copping a feel as they passed each other. Jack was okay with Ennis touching him now, and he gave it right back as they attempted to cook together. Afterwards, they resumed their positions on the sofa to watch a romantic movie, throwing the afghan over themselves just to snuggle up. Jack felt warm and safe and happy, mainly because Ennis was right there with him and not going anywhere.

"I love you," he said quietly, squeezing Ennis's hand. His partner smiled down at him and planted a kiss in his hair, love coursing through his veins.

"Love you too, darlin'," he replied, sighing in contentment as he let Jack's scent wash over him. Everything would be just fine, especially after tonight when they finally connected again.

* * *

Jack was extremely nervous as they locked up the apartment and tidied away before going to bed. He really did want to have sex with Ennis but the other night was playing on his mind, worrying him. He knew deep down that he had nothing to worry about now; unprotected sex wasn't going to make things any worse for either of them.

"Look at it this way," Ennis told him as they stood at the end of the bed, holding hands. "No more barriers...nothing to separate us anymore. We can...really go at each other without fearing that the protection's gonna break. We can come inside each other without fear of you infecting me. Isn't that what we both wanted, deep down? I know we never really talked about it, but..."

Jack nodded in defeat, looking down. "Yeah, I guess. I'm just nervous..."

Ennis lifted his chin and kissed him, gauging his response when they broke apart. Jack looked at him for a moment before responding in kind, moaning softly when their tongues met. "Ennis..." he sighed, feeling arousal building up inside him. He needed this so much.

"Come on..." Ennis whispered, and they headed for their respective sides of the bed. They knew that they had to take things slowly right now, and he was all for that. They got under the covers and exchanged a glance before undressing; Ennis couldn't help but kiss Jack's neck when it was exposed, drawing a smile out of him.

"Ennis...you know that tickles," he grinned, and Ennis smiled back at him. They got the rest of their clothes off and turned to face each other, hearts beating quickly. "Well..."

"Can I touch you now?" Ennis asked softly, hand inches away from Jack's body. He saw Jack nod, trust in his eyes. At this permission, Ennis reached over and lightly brushed his fingers over Jack's erection, watching as Jack took a deep breath. "That feel good?"

"Yeah," Jack replied, nodding. It really did, and he appreciated how slowly Ennis was taking things. He shuffled over and looked deep into Ennis's eyes. "Kiss me..."

Ennis needed no further encouragement. He leaned over and captured Jack's mouth in a firm kiss, his desires quite clear. Jack moaned and moved his lips against Ennis's, tongues winding around each other. He had missed this as if he'd been deprived of oxygen for the past few days; he _needed_ Ennis tonight.

When they had been kissing and touching each other for a few minutes, Ennis sensed that Jack might be ready for more. "You ready?" he whispered when they broke apart for air, gasping slightly. Jack nodded, his eyes lidded and heavy with lust. He was getting back on track.

"I sure as hell am," he replied, tugging at Ennis's waist. Ennis recognised the familiar gesture and rolled on top of him, careful not to crush him but settling between Jack's legs comfortably. Jack kissed him but yearned for closer contact. "Ennis...lie down on me...need to feel you..."

Ennis trusted that Jack was certain of this, so he did as he was asked. Jack sighed when he felt Ennis's body touching his, smiling up at him. "That feel better?" Ennis asked, and Jack nodded.

"Yeah..." He allowed Ennis to take hold of his hands as they kissed once more, growing harder as their bodies rubbed together. Ennis bit his lip; he would come soon and he wanted to be inside Jack when it happened.

"Jack, I...I wanna..." Jack nodded in understanding and spread his legs wider, eyes inviting Ennis in.

"It's okay...we can do this, Ennis. We need to..." Ennis grabbed the lube and smeared it over himself, feeling strange at the loss of a condom. He never thought he'd ever be doing it raw, but there was no reason not to now.

When he was ready, he positioned himself and slowly started to push in, watching Jack's face carefully. Seeing no pain beyond that which he expected, he kept going until they were tightly pressed together, looking down into Jack's eyes. In that moment, he knew that they were going to be alright.

He took it slowly, nuzzling Jack's neck as he moved inside him and hearing soft moans in his ear. He liked how he could make Jack feel like this, and he was happy to know that Jack was getting better. "Darlin'...you always feel so damn good..."

Jack sighed, wrapping his arms and legs around Ennis. "You make me feel good, Ennis...always have and always will..."

They rocked together slowly, murmuring words of love to each other as they neared their climaxes. Ennis let go of Jack's waist and moved his hand down, taking hold of Jack and stroking him. Instead of panicking like the day before, Jack felt relief as Ennis jerked him off, groaning in his ear. "God, Ennis...fuck me..."

Ennis gladly did so, pushing deeper and harder until he felt himself coming, filling Jack with his sperm at long last. He'd secretly wanted this for so long, and it felt incredible. He felt Jack shoot at his stomach and was liberated by how they no longer had to be careful.

They collapsed together on the bed, heads spinning as they tried to catch their breath. "Oh God..." Jack breathed, still wrapped around Ennis and unable to move. "That was..."

"I know..." Ennis replied, pulling out of Jack but otherwise staying where he was. He had never felt as free as he did tonight, knowing that there was nothing to worry about now whenever they had sex. "Oh, darlin'..." He kissed Jack all over his face and on his lips, resting their foreheads together. "I..."

"Shh..." Jack shushed him, smiling fondly. He felt so much better now, happily sated. It had felt strange to feel Ennis come inside him, but he could certainly get used to it. He kissed Ennis's forehead and tucked it down into the crook of his shoulder, where Ennis settled down and closed his eyes. No matter what happened, they both knew now that they would be just fine.


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter 9 **

_September 15th, 2012_

On Saturday, Ennis and Jack had an appointment with their doctor to discuss their options, now that things had changed. They were both aware that their only real choice now was to try and adopt a child. Although this would take a long time, they were willing to do whatever it took.

Jack had more or less snapped out of his low mood, which Ennis had noticed. He was very glad for this, for it meant that Jack could now help him cope with this huge change. He needed any advice that Jack could give him.

As they sat in the waiting area, they half-listened to the TV and held hands. "Look..." Jack started, turning to Ennis. "I know that things haven't been easy for us, and I know it was mostly me being all depressed. The thing is...it's all gonna change now. I'm better than I was before and I wanna help you."

Ennis smiled over at him. "I appreciate it, bud...you know that. I don't have a clue what I'm supposed to be doing, so I could do with whatever you can give me."

Jack squeezed his fingers. "I'll help you, Ennis...with whatever you need. The most important thing is to take care of your body, and learn to figure out when it's trying to tell you something...like if anything goes wrong with it."

"Alright," Ennis replied, storing this thought away in his brain. "So...I know all about the right food for me to eat; learned all that from cooking for you."

"Yep. Maybe we could talk to a nutrition expert," Jack suggested. "That might be useful, right?"

"Guess so." They were called into their doctor's office and found him waiting for them. John smiled at them.

"Hey, you two. How're things going since the diagnosis?"

"We're coping," Ennis told him as they sat down. "Wasn't easy at first...Jack took it harder than me..."

"I did kinda freak out about it," Jack admitted, looking down at his free hand; his other still hadn't let go of Ennis's. "Hated myself for what happened. But I know now that it wasn't my fault...just an accident. I don't blame myself anymore." He exchanged a smile with Ennis, and John nodded.

"That's great. So, you probably want to know what to do next. Since you can't have a biological child, your only option would be to adopt. Now, I said before that this is a long process and can be quite stressful, but I'm sure that you're ready for it. You two have already proved yourselves to be quite a team."

John reached into his desk and pulled out a file, which they could see contained several papers. "Well, here is everything you really need to know. First off, you would get into contact with a local adoption agency, one that has space on their list. Then someone you know, perhaps a parent themselves, will have to write a letter of recommendation to testify that you would be good parents to a child." He looked between them. "If that goes well, then at some point someone from the agency would have to come to your apartment to make sure that it is a good environment to raise a child in, especially given your HIV status."

"So that would come into account?" Jack asked, feeling unsure. He wasn't sure if that was a good thing or not. John nodded.

"Afraid so. It shouldn't work against you; there are a lot of forward-thinking agencies in the city and I'm sure you'll find one. If the adoption worker deems your place acceptable, and they say you would make good parents, you will be on the official waiting list."

"So anybody could pick us, at any time? It's not like...we have to wait until everybody else on the list before us has been picked?" Ennis asked, fearing just how long this would take.

"At any time. Say that you were on the list. Someone who wants to give up their child for adoption could get in touch with the same agency that you're with, and they would be presented with a list of who is waiting, including just about everything they need to know about each one. However, names would remain anonymous for the time being."

"And what if they pick us?" Jack asked. John leafed through the papers.

"Well, then they might request to get in touch with you, meet with you and learn your names. Especially if we're talking about a pregnant woman who doesn't want the baby but still wants the best for it. If the meeting goes well and they choose you, then the paperwork will be drawn up and everybody would sign it."

"What if we're talking about a child that's in Social Services?" Jack asked. "One that's already been born?"

"Things would be different...but we can go into that another time, if you wish. For now, you should be putting together your file and seeking someone to write the recommendation letter. Here..." He handed them the file. "Everything you need to know is in here. Take a look and work through it together. Trust me, it'll help."

"Thanks," Ennis said to him, taking the file. He couldn't wait to work on this with Jack; it felt more equal to him than their previous plan. Jack could be part of this. "We'll look over this when we get back home."

Jack smiled and nodded his agreement. "Right. So...shall we go?"

"I think you've got plenty to be going on with," John said to them, nodding. "Feel free to call me if you have any questions, but I think you'll be fine." They stood up and shook his hand before leaving the office.

When they left the building, Jack gave Ennis a wide smile and kissed him. Ennis looked stunned for a moment. "Where'd that come from?"

Jack shrugged. "Just...happy. I like this, Ennis. I know it could take a while, but...doing all this will take our minds off the bad stuff." Ennis nodded, glad that they were getting back on track.

* * *

Ennis and Jack headed to a nearby café for lunch, knowing that there was a lot to talk about. Both of them were warming to the idea of adopting a child despite its problems, and they thought that as long as they took it slowly, it would be fine.

When they walked into the café, they were about to take a centre table when they heard someone calling to them.

"Ennis! Jack!" It was Jack's mother Karen, sat in a window seat and waving them over.

"Mom?" Jack asked, and they headed over to her. "You never told us you would be in the city today," he said to her as they kissed her on the cheek.

"Just decided today to get out of the house," she replied when they sat down. "What've you got there?"

Jack looked at Ennis; they hadn't yet told her about the infection but knew they would have to. "Um, mom...something happened a couple of weeks ago. It was a complete accident and now we're having to change all our plans."

"What is it?" she asked. Ennis and Jack paused to place their orders for lunch and then Jack continued.

"I...I infected Ennis by accident," Jack said in a low voice. She looked shocked.

"Oh God...are you two okay?"

"Yeah, we're fine. Wasn't easy at first, 'cos I was so mad at myself for it. But we're getting through it and we're gonna be okay." Jack smiled and took her hand across the table. "We're really okay, Mom. Not fighting, not angry at each other...nothing like that."

"Well, that's something. Are you taking care of yourself, Ennis?" Karen asked him, fixing him with a very beady eye. He knew that she cared about him like a son.

"Yeah. I'm on meds, like Jack. And he's been giving me advice now we're doing okay again. We can support each other through this and hold each other up when we need to. We can take care of each other," he replied, smiling at Jack. She nodded her approval.

"Good. So what's this?" she asked, pointing to the file.

"Well...Lureen didn't get pregnant and we obviously can't try again, so we're looking into adoption. We met with our doctor this morning, and he gave us all this and explained what to do now. I've gotta say...it doesn't look too bad now," Jack told her. He slid the file over to her so that she could see for herself.

While she thumbed through it, their lunch came and they distracted themselves while waiting for what she had to say. Despite his age, Jack was aware that his mother's opinion mattered a great deal to him. He still liked hearing her advice on things.

Eventually, she smiled up at their expectant faces. "Well...this looks like it won't be easy, but I'm sure you can do it. I'll help in any way I can, I promise."

"Thanks, Mom..." Jack cleared his throat. "S'cuse me a second," he added, getting up to head for the restroom. He kissed Ennis's cheek on his way past, making him blush.

Karen looked at him, pausing before speaking. "So...are you gonna tell your parents?" she asked Ennis, and he shrugged.

"I don't know. I've thought about it, a lot. But I've really no idea what to do. When we were planning to have a kid with Lureen, Jack said I should tell them. He said...he didn't want me to regret anything about them. His dad could've died without them building bridges and he would've regretted that. He doesn't want me to go through the same thing, and I can understand that. But now...I'm not sure. I might regret telling them that I'm positive."

"I know," Karen told him, covering his hand where it lay on the table. Ennis liked having her close by, being estranged from his own parents. He, like Jack, needed a mother figure around and she was the best he had. He had a feeling that she knew that. "But, Ennis...Jack's right. Everybody needs their parents, no matter how old they are. I don't want you to regret anything either. You're afraid of what they'll say, aren't you?"

He shook his head. "I don't care what they say to me; I can take it. But...I can't stand there and watch them hurl abuse at Jack; he doesn't deserve it. They've already done it twice and I told him that I never wanted to see them again. I was happy to just leave it." He thought for a moment. "I don't know what I wanna do." He then spotted Jack coming back. "But I know I'll do whatever I have to in order to protect him...even if that means never speaking to my parents again."

Ennis managed to smile when Jack got closer, enjoying the brush across the shoulders that Jack gave him. "Hey, bud."

"What're you talking about here?" Jack asked as he sat down. Ennis squeezed his hand.

"I'll tell you later. Nothing bad, I promise. Just stuff." Jack nodded; he was used to this part of their relationship. Ennis would tell him when he was ready.

Lunch carried on as normal, with the talk turning to how Karen was spending time volunteering at the local animal shelter. She was fairly wealthy, mainly from how Jack's father had done so well with his business when alive. She technically didn't need to work, but she liked getting involved with good causes. Ennis could see where Jack got his good heart from.

When they were done and bid goodbye to Karen, she told them to keep in touch if they needed anything or just wanted to talk. Jack did feel better at living fairly close to her now and he knew that it eased Ennis's mind that he felt comfortable living here.

They took a long stroll through the park together, enjoying the rest of the day and talking about the adoption process. There was a hill to climb, but they could get there together.

* * *

_September 18th, 2012_

On Tuesday, Ennis and Jack had decided to make the most of the good weather while it lasted. They went down to Manhattan Beach together, where there were a lot of other couples enjoying the sunshine. Jack liked strolling down the sand with his partner during a day off; they could do just about anything in this city.

Ennis kept thinking over his conversation with Karen the other day, and whether or not he should tell his parents what was going on. Technically, they did have a right to know in case something happened, but they had been estranged for a few months now and he had previously decided that he didn't want to talk to them at all. They hadn't even attended the wedding.

Jack could tell that something was on Ennis's mind, but he said nothing as they found a spot to sunbathe in. Clearly, Ennis would tell him in his own time. They spread out their beach towels and stripped off their T-shirts, wearing just their swimming trunks. Both kept glancing at each other as they lay down, admiring the glowing skin and strong muscles. They would never get tired of looking at each other.

They took it in turns to rub suntan lotion on each other's backs, Jack making sure to try and work out the tension from Ennis. He just wanted his husband to relax; he had a feeling that Ennis was thinking about his parents and he wasn't sure what else to do.

"Mmm," he sighed when he felt Ennis rubbing the lotion into his back. "Always love having your hands on me..." Ennis smiled affectionately at him, grateful that he still had one person he could rely on.

"Love touching you, Jack..." He planted a kiss between Jack's shoulder blades and climbed off him, laying down at his side as they listened to the waves. "This is good..."

"Sure is," Jack agreed, opening his eyes and smiling. "We can just forget everything down here..." He peered closely at Ennis, knowing that he was thinking deeply again. "Bud, are you okay?"

Ennis looked at him and turned onto his side; Jack copied his movement and rested on his elbow. "There's something I keep thinking about. When you were in the bathroom the other day, at the café, your mom was talking to me about telling my parents. She said that you were right; maybe I ought to do something before it's too late. Your dad died and you nearly didn't fix things with him before it happened. You would've regretted that...and you said you didn't want me feeling the same."

"I really don't," Jack told him, rubbing his arm. "But you know that it's your choice, and I'll stick by you no matter what."

Ennis nodded. "I think...I do wanna at least tell them that things have changed now. That we're gonna adopt. They'll wanna know why, so then I could tell them. But what if they act just like the other times we went to see them?"

Jack sighed; this conversation kept going in circles. "Look...I know that you're worried. But they're your parents; they're supposed to love you no matter what. I never thought I'd ever make up with my dad after the things he said to me. I mean, he said that I'd got what I deserved for being gay; I never thought I'd forgive him for that. But he had his reasons for saying it and he apologised. Your parents must have their reasons too; they're just worried about you. And maybe they will apologise one day."

"I don't know...I think I do wanna talk to them. Just really nervous about doing it. I can't do it over the phone; I'd have to go over there."

"Do you want me to come with you?" Jack offered, his voice soft. Ennis took his hand.

"I really do...but what if they start on you again?"

"Then we'll just leave like we did before. I can take it, Ennis. I'm a lot better now than when you were diagnosed and I know that I should be by your side when you tell them. You think you can do it?"

Ennis looked deep into Jack's eyes; they were the same shade of blue as the ocean nearby and they always pierced into his soul. "Maybe...but I think I need you there. And you're right; if they start we'll just leave. But what if they tell me that they never wanna see me again now that I'm positive?"

"You'll always have me," Jack murmured, running his fingers through Ennis's curls. "I'm not going anywhere. And we've got my mom nearby; she'll never abandon us. You know she sees you as a second son now."

"I know," Ennis replied, managing to smile at him. "Come here..." He leaned forward and kissed Jack firmly, needing some reassurance. If the beach had been less busy, Jack would have loved to lie down on top of Ennis and give him what they both wanted. But a kiss and an embrace would have to do. They held each other close as they explored one another, tongues sliding together between their lips. It was heaven to be here together, doing this.

When they broke apart, Jack nuzzled Ennis's nose. "Feel any better?" Ennis nodded, trying to breathe after a kiss like that.

"Yeah...that was good. I love you so much, darlin'...really glad I've got you with me." He felt his fingers slide through Jack's, his wedding ring feeling strangely cold against Jack's warm skin. "God...wish I had the words to tell you how much I..." He trailed off, sighing. Jack stroked his cheek.

"It's okay," he said softly. "I know how you feel...I see it every time I look in your eyes. I feel it right here." He pressed his hand to Ennis's chest, over his heart. "This tells me how you feel." He pulled Ennis close for another kiss, finally getting him to relax and just forget about everything else.

* * *

Jack figured that the fresh air had gone straight to Ennis's head; it was the only reason he could come up with as to why Ennis was pounding him through the mattress in the middle of the afternoon. Not that he was complaining, but he had to wonder.

They had come back to the apartment about an hour ago and had decided to make dinner early. Now it was in the oven and Ennis had been all over him, kissing his neck and trailing his hands down. Jack loved it when Ennis pounced on him like this; it proved that despite being comfortably married, they were still so attracted to each other that they sometimes couldn't help themselves. Ennis had felt him up for less than a minute before he'd decided to just go for it.

Now he was on his knees and gripping the headboard, groaning in both pain and pleasure while Ennis practically lay on his back, fucking him hard. Jack thought his head would split open with the rushing in his blood, leaking onto the bed and every fibre of his body screaming for release. "Oh God..." he groaned, his arms and head lowering to the pillow. Now only his hips were in the air, with Ennis buried deep inside him and thrusting quickly.

"I fucking love you," Ennis growled in his ear, biting it. Jack was painfully hard and thought he would lose his mind if he didn't shoot soon.

"Ennis...touch me, please!" he called out, shaking all over. Ennis could sense that Jack's erection was starting to become painful, so he did as he was asked. He took hold of Jack with one hand and started jerking him off, still thrusting deep into him. Jack was pushing back with every thrust, completely at his mercy. Ennis could feel the sweat on Jack's back as they moved together and he started licking at it, knowing how ticklish Jack was.

Jack trembled a few times and finally came, shooting at the headboard with a loud yell. Ennis thrust a few more times until he too crossed the finish line, filling Jack up with everything he had to give and then collapsing onto him. Jack's knees were weak from his own orgasm, so he fell to the bed under Ennis's weight. "Oh my God," he gasped, trying to focus. "Ennis..."

Ennis sighed, feeling his love for Jack blazing in his heart. He ran a hand over Jack's back and pulled out of him, kissing his lover's shoulder. "Darlin'...that was damn good..."

"I know...where the hell did that come from?" Jack asked him, managing to turn over underneath him. His cheeks were flushed and his hair was plastered to his forehead with sweat. To Ennis, he looked beautiful. Ennis shrugged, smirking.

"Just...felt like giving you a good seeing-to. Don't mind, do you?" Jack shook his head, still trying to get his breath back.

"Hell no. Took me by surprise, but damn...been a while since we went at it so hard." He was very pleased that Ennis was still so turned on by him to just grab him like that; he'd never doubted Ennis's attraction to him but it was nice to be reminded.

"I know...we've kind of had a lot on lately." Ennis looked down for a moment. "Didn't hurt you, did I? You're not bleeding?" Together they examined themselves, but they didn't see any blood.

"No, I think I'm okay. My hips and my ass are gonna be sore for a while though," Jack grinned. Ennis smiled weakly.

"Sorry, darlin'..." he tried to apologise, but Jack covered his mouth.

"Don't be," he said gently, smiling when Ennis kissed his palm. "I'm not...that was amazing, bud." Ennis was between his legs again, but neither of them had the energy to go again despite their slight arousals. They were just comfortable now, basking in the afterglow. "I'm serious...if it's possible, I love you even more than I already did. You're just...amazing. You're my best friend and we can talk about everything...you know how to make me feel better when I'm upset. You're always there for me and you help me see how to be there for you." He ran his hands through Ennis's hair. "But on the other hand...you really know how to make my toes curl. You can push all the right buttons to make me feel good, and I think I've learned how to do the same for you, over the past few years."

Ennis nodded at him. "We're there for each other, Jack. If that's really what you think about me, then...I've gotta say that I feel the same about you." He kissed Jack on the tip of his nose, making him giggle unexpectedly. Ennis smiled. "I love hearing you laugh, bud...love seeing you happy."

"You make me happy," Jack told him, kissing his cheek warmly. He felt Ennis's hands searching for his and they held on to each other, squeezing gently. "Mmm...this is nice."

"Sure is." Ennis checked the alarm clock; they had about twenty minutes before dinner would be ready. "I've decided...I wanna go to see my parents and tell them what's happened. And...I'd like you to be there with me."

Jack nodded. "Whatever you need, bud. I'm there for you."

"But if they start insulting us?" Ennis asked, brow creasing slightly.

"We'll leave," Jack said simply, gazing up into his eyes. It intrigued him how he could feel so secure to be laying underneath someone and know that he could completely trust them. Ennis would never hurt him and Jack knew he'd never hurt Ennis; they needed each other in their lives and did everything they could to make their relationship work. They didn't need to do too much; they simply loved each other enough to keep them together. But he did like making an effort for Ennis's happiness; it felt as though he was doing something right. As he looked up into his soul mate's eyes, Jack knew there was nothing that they couldn't overcome.

* * *

_September 20th, 2012_

On Thursday morning, Jack woke up early and groaned when he remembered the date. It had been eight years to the day since he'd been attacked and infected, and he sadly remembered every detail of that morning. He looked over; Ennis was still asleep. Trying not to disturb him, Jack slid out of bed and exited the room, knowing that he needed to stretch his legs and try to keep hold of himself.

As he entered the main room, he was hit with a flashback of Central Park. He stopped in his tracks, trying to hold it together. He hated how they still came to him and how he could remember every detail.

_Keep it together, _Jack told himself, breathing deeply. _The memories will only hurt you if you let them. _He shook his head and walked into the bathroom, and suddenly felt phantom pain on the back of his head where he had been hit. He groaned and splashed cold water on his face, gripping the sink.

_He walked along the path, groaning out in pain when he felt something hit him. He fell to the ground and felt someone drag him off the path. He tried to fight them off but was too disoriented._

Ennis woke up to find himself alone and he wondered where Jack had got to. Then he remembered what day it was and he sighed; the anniversary of the attack. "Jack..." he murmured, hoping that his partner was okay.

Jack had his head lowered, trying to fight off the memories but they were too strong for him. He tried to take deep breaths as his doctor had instructed him to, but he'd never had any success with this.

_He felt his attacker pulling his jeans down and shoving in without mercy. Jack screamed in pain and hoped that someone would hear him and help. His body was burning inside and he was terrified of what it would do to him. _

_It was over soon enough and he was left alone, breathing deeply. He was shaking all over and knew he had to get to hospital; he needed help._

Jack was on his knees by the toilet by now, throwing up and gasping for breath. "Ennis!" he managed to call out before retching again, praying that Ennis would hear him. He didn't care if it made him weak; he needed his partner to hold him and make everything alright again.

Ennis heard his yell and shot out of bed, scrambling out of the room and following the sounds of Jack throwing up. He sighed when he saw his beloved Jack on the floor, completely broken down. He sank to his knees beside Jack, rubbing his back.

"It's okay, I'm here," he soothed, knowing that it would be over soon. "It's alright...it's not real. He's behind bars and he can't hurt you again...I'm right here, darlin'."

Jack heard Ennis's soothing voice and immediately started to calm down, taking deep breaths. Ennis left his side for just a few moments to draw a glass of water for him, helping him to gulp it down. "It's alright..." Jack had stopped throwing up but he was shaking; the memories always did this to him and he hated it.

When he had finished the water, Jack looked into Ennis's eyes and his own filled with tears, shaking his head. "I don't...they just do this to me..." He gulped. "Ennis...I can't stop remembering..."

"Baby," Ennis whispered, cupping his cheeks gently. "It's alright. I know what those memories do to you, and I hate to see you like this. But I'm right here and nothing's gonna hurt you." Jack sniffed and Ennis wiped the tears from his eyes. "Shh..."

He gently pulled Jack into his arms and held him close, rubbing his back and rocking him slightly. He knew by now exactly what would make Jack feel better and he was glad that he could do this for his partner. He was also glad that Jack had infected him, because he didn't think that Jack would have the strength to do this for him.

Jack sighed, feeling himself calm down after his fright. "Ennis...thank you. You...you always know what to do. I love you so much..."

"I love you too, darlin'." Ennis held him until Jack felt better, prising himself away to look into Ennis's eyes.

"Ennis...take me back to bed. I...I want you to hold me until I fall asleep again..." he murmured, needing that more than anything else. Ennis nodded; he would do anything that Jack asked him.

He took Jack's hands and helped him stand up; Jack was a little wobbly so they took the walk slowly. It was still very early yet and they didn't have to get up for work for another few hours, so Ennis was happy to let Jack sleep in for a while.

They got back into bed and Ennis turned Jack onto his side, spooning up behind him and wrapping an arm over his stomach. He planted a soft kiss on Jack's shoulder. "Get some sleep, darlin'. Nothing's gonna happen to you as long as I'm here."

"I'm...safe?" Jack whispered. Under normal circumstances, he knew this but things were different at this moment. Ennis squeezed him, rubbing his stomach.

"Yeah, you are. The door's locked; nobody can get in and I'd never let anything happen to you. Just close your eyes and get some sleep." Jack relaxed at the warmth behind him, doing as Ennis instructed. It took him a while to fall asleep again, but he didn't stir and Ennis was confident that he would sleep until the alarm went off.

Some part of him knew that while Jack was more or less over what had happened, his body would never forget it. Like it or not, Jack had been branded and the flashbacks were bound to be part of his life. Still, it was just one day and always in the morning; Ennis would always be there to look after him when it happened.


	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter 10**

_September 21st, 2012_

On Friday, Ennis and Jack were due to fly to San Francisco after work. They had ultimately decided to visit Ennis's parents over the weekend and both were nervous. Ennis had called that morning and left them a message on the answerphone to tell them that they would be visiting; he was glad that he hadn't spoken to either of them directly because he thought he would lose his nerve if he did.

Jack had recovered quickly from his setback the other day, with his flashbacks of what had happened to him, and he knew that it was mainly due to Ennis being there and taking care of him. That night, he had shown Ennis his gratitude in the best way he knew how, taking him in his mouth and driving him crazy with lust. He still hadn't plucked up the courage yet to be on top but he figured that would come in time; they were more or less back to normal now.

"You okay?" Jack asked him as they waited for the taxi that would take them to the airport. Ennis nodded.

"Yeah, I'll be okay. Just wish this flight wasn't so long..." Jack rubbed the back of his neck.

"I know, bud. But think of it this way...maybe we can entertain ourselves on the plane," he suggested, hoping to get a smile out of Ennis. It worked; Ennis's cheeks flushed and he looked down. "You're cute when you blush." He kissed Ennis's cheek and soon they heard a car horn somewhere down below.

Knowing that a long journey was ahead of them, Jack had thought of something to distract Ennis with (apart from a rendezvous in the bathroom of the plane). When they got to the airport and checked in, they took their seats to wait and Jack reached into his carry-on.

"Here," he said, handing over the white book to Ennis; it was their personal photo album from the years they'd spent together. In pride of place on the first page was the very first photo they'd had together, the one that Lureen had taken for them. The album still had plenty of space left, and Jack hoped that one day they would have a family.

"Good thinking, bud," Ennis admitted, looking through the pages fondly. He found their wedding photos and smiled; it had been a beautiful day and one that he would never forget as long as he lived. "God...you looked amazing that day," he said as he admired the photo of Jack in his suit. Jack nudged him.

"You did too...was tempted to drag you into a dark corner and have my way with you," he grinned, and Ennis smiled back at him. He knew that Jack was just trying to take his mind off the meeting with his parents, and he appreciated it.

As Ennis had feared, the flight was long and tedious; he just wanted to get it over with. The highlight was undoubtedly meeting up with Jack for a little fun in the bathroom. He did like how they didn't have to be careful anymore, and he revelled in how he could swallow when he went down on Jack. The taste was strange but he liked it, and he figured that maybe they were better off this way.

"God, I love you," he breathed, forehead pressed against Jack's. He felt arms snaking around his waist and pulling him close.

"Same to you, baby. Ennis, I...I know it won't be easy, but...we'll get through this meeting. I promise." Ennis nodded, very glad that Jack was here with him.

"I won't let them insult you," he murmured, holding on to Jack's shoulders. "We'll leave if they do. But I just want to at least try."

"I know, Ennis..." He leaned in for another deep kiss, less frantic than the one Ennis had greeted him with just a few minutes before but still passionate. He then brought Ennis's head down to his shoulder, not caring that their jeans were still around their ankles.

Eventually, they went back to their seats and tried to ignore the wink that the stewardess gave them as they emerged. They knew that they'd been figured out but neither cared; they weren't ashamed of their love and nobody had seen what they had been doing.

Back in their seats, they held hands and tried to watch the movie that was playing. Ennis kept thinking over how he would break the news to his parents. He had his medical records with him that proved the infection, but wondered if he would even want to show it to them. They were bound to take his word for it anyway.

They got to the hotel some hours later, needing to get some sleep before their meeting tomorrow. When they walked into the room, Jack took one look at the double bed and immediately felt tired. "God...I need to sleep." Ennis nodded as he locked the door.

"Me too. Let's just get undressed and get in," he replied. He wasn't even thinking about sex right now, which wasn't unusual; sometimes they were just too tired. He felt slightly aroused when he saw Jack stripping off, but his body was too tired to do anything about it.

They got under the sheets and sighed in unison, staring up at the ceiling. "Don't suppose you're up for it?" Jack asked, looking at him. Ennis shook his head.

"Sorry, darlin'...too tired. You know I don't like turning you away, but...I can't."

"Thank God," Jack groaned as he stretched. "I'm not either but I was willing to do it if you wanted." They grinned at each other at how well they could communicate and Jack stroked Ennis's cheek with the back of his hand. Ennis lifted his arm up and Jack snuggled up against him, kissing him softly. "Night, baby."

"Night, Jack," Ennis replied, glad to have someone to hold in the night who would make him feel better. Jack was everything to him and he would fight his own parents to keep hold of him.

* * *

Jack woke up a few hours later to find himself alone in the bed. With a look around the room, he soon located Ennis standing by the window and looking out. Jack could tell from the way he was standing that he was tired but couldn't sleep, and he slid out of bed.

"Ennis?" he called softly, coming up behind him. Ennis turned his head and smiled.

"Hey...did I wake you?"

Jack wrapped his arms around Ennis's waist and kissed his bare shoulder. "Not really...just woke up and you weren't there. You okay?" Ennis shrugged.

"Can't sleep...worrying about tomorrow." He covered Jack's arms with his own, feeling more relaxed now that Jack was here. "Just...thinking about how they're gonna take it. I remember the other times we tried to see them, and how it just ended badly. Is this really a good idea?" He turned to look over his shoulder and into Jack's eyes.

"I don't know. But...I can see that you want to try anyway, and I know why. They're your parents and...in spite of everything they've said and done, there are some bonds that you just can't break. That's why I wanted to forgive my dad even after everything he said to me. No matter how old we get, we still want approval from our parents. Some things just don't change."

Ennis nodded, sighing. "Guess you're right. Jack, I...I want you to know...I don't regret choosing to stay with you, even after they suggested I break up with you." He felt Jack stroking his skin. "I mean...it's never gonna be easy and I knew that right from the start. But I also know that I've never been this happy in my life...you made me happy." He thought for a moment. "When I realised that I was gay, I never thought I'd find anyone who would feel about me the way you do. Guess I never thought I deserved it."

Jack kissed the back of his neck. "I don't like it when you put yourself down, Ennis. You're a good man; better than you might think. And you've always been good to me...I'm damn lucky to have you and I don't wanna hear you talking like that."

"Can't help it," Ennis said quietly, and Jack released him. He took Ennis by the shoulders and turned him around.

"Shhh," he shushed, and he leaned in. Ennis's lips were warm and soft, but Jack could tell that he still needed some reassurance. He held Ennis's face in his hands the way he liked, and he felt Ennis holding onto his hips unsurely. "It's alright," he murmured when they broke apart. "Everything's gonna be fine tomorrow. Even if they say they never wanna see you again, you won't be alone. I'm not going anywhere. You'll always have me, baby."

Ennis smiled at the endearment and pulled him closer, embracing his lover in the moonlight flowing through the window. It was very romantic and all was quiet in the city; he had always loved this time while they'd lived here. "Mmm..."

"This is nice," Jack said softly, his head resting on Ennis's shoulder. "You know I love having sex with you, and it's always great. But I do like times like this...where we just hold each other. It's more...I dunno..."

"Romantic?" Ennis suggested. Jack nodded.

"Yeah, I guess. I mean, sometimes we can be romantic when we're in bed, but...it's more about the act and how we make each other feel. This is just different..."

"I know what you mean," Ennis replied, nuzzling him. Jack felt warm and alive in his arms, and he never wanted to let go. "God...I love holding you..."

Jack smiled. "Same here." He pulled his head away to look into Ennis's eyes. "You look beautiful in the moonlight," he murmured, brushing hair away from Ennis's forehead. "You do," he added when Ennis's cheeks coloured and he looked away, a shy smile on his face. "Ennis...before you met me, did anybody ever tell you that? That you're beautiful?"

Ennis shook his head sadly; nobody had ever told him that; he'd just figured that it wasn't a word commonly used to describe men, and until Jack had used it the first time he hadn't known what he was missing. Jack sighed.

"Baby...I'm sorry for that. But you really are and I hope that one day you can see what I love about you. I just want you to be happy with yourself."

Ennis managed to smile at him. "Well, with you...I'll probably get there one day." He kissed Jack on the lips and nuzzled his nose, making him grin. Jack had always loved the little touches like this, the loving gestures that passed between them.

"You think you can sleep now?" Jack asked, and Ennis took his hand.

"Just something I wanted to show you...why I wanted us to stay here. Come here..." He led Jack to the window and positioned himself behind him, pointing out. "You see there?"

Jack looked at the building Ennis was pointing at, but in the dark he couldn't really tell why Ennis was pointing at it. "What am I supposed to be seeing?"

"That building, right there...it's our old apartment building," Ennis told him, smiling. "You said I could decide where we stay, and I saw the location of this place on a map and realised it would have a view of where we used to live, when I moved in with you."

Jack grinned as he realised that Ennis was right; it was their previous home. "Oh God...that's amazing. Think about everything we've been through since we left. Especially getting married, and now we're looking at adoption...can't believe it."

"Me neither." Ennis kissed his cheek. "Come on, bud." He led Jack back to bed and they wrapped themselves around each other once more. With their faces just inches away, Jack stroked Ennis's cheek.

"Whatever happens tomorrow...I love you." Ennis kissed his wrist.

"I love you too, darlin'." They closed their eyes, trying not to think of what tomorrow might bring.

* * *

_September 22nd, 2012_

The next day, Ennis and Jack headed to Mill Valley to speak to Ennis's parents. Both of them were dreading it, but Ennis knew in his heart that he at least wanted to try with them. If he and Jack were going to adopt one day, he wanted his parents to be part of the child's life.

They took a rental car up into the area, and Ennis had decided to take his medical records along but he'd soon realised that it wouldn't change anything. They would simply say that he had the virus and it wouldn't make any difference. Still, he at least knew that Jack would support him no matter what. He hadn't told Jack that he was taking the records with him; it wouldn't matter. Jack was still under the impression that he'd left them in the hotel.

When they pulled up outside the house, Ennis started taking deep breaths and Jack grasped his shoulder. "Just remember to stay calm...that's your best way of talking to them rationally so that there's no yelling." He let his hand fall and held it open, his eyes full of love as Ennis looked at him. He took Jack's hand and squeezed it before they exited the car, looking around. He hoped that one day, he and Jack might move out of the city into a house of their own, possibly with a child to bring up. He would love that and he hoped that Jack would too.

"Well...we better get this done," he said finally, taking Jack's hand once more. He nodded and they headed up to the house together. Ennis knocked and felt Jack squeezing his fingers in support; it gave him hope that everything would be fine.

The door opened and his mother appeared, looking wary when she saw Jack but keeping civil. "Ennis, Jack..." She smiled at her son. "It's good to see you."

Sarah hugged her son but merely shook Jack's hand; Jack knew that his mother would have something to say about that, for she always hugged them both. "Good to see you, Mom," Ennis replied as they walked inside. His father Keith was there, glaring at Jack and not even attempting to hide it.

"So..." Sarah started as they all sat down. "What brings you here after so long? Been over a year since we last saw you."

Ennis swallowed down his question of whose fault that was and nodded. "Well...some things have happened since then. Really big things that I thought you should know about, being my parents." He took a deep breath. "We, um...well, you know we got married back in the spring, and now...we're looking into adopting a baby."

His parents looked at each other in shock. "You are? Will they allow someone with HIV to adopt?" Sarah asked, looking at Jack. He bit back a snarl, annoyed that she was treating him with such contempt. Ennis nudged him with his knee to let him know it was okay.

"Yeah, they will. As long as we can prove we'd be good parents and that we can provide for a child, we should be fine."

Keith looked thoughtful for a moment. "So, why adoption? Couldn't you just have a kid with a friend or something? That insemination thing?" Jack groaned inwardly at their coming reaction.

Ennis sighed. "We were gonna do that, with our friend Lureen. We got all the papers signed and even had our first attempt, but..."

"Did it just not happen and now you've given up?" Sarah asked, and he shook his head.

"No, I..." He glanced at Jack and they braced themselves. "I've caught the virus, from Jack. And it happened before we could have another try with Lureen, so this is our only option."

His parents looked both shocked and disgusted. "What the hell?!" his father growled, standing up. Ennis quickly followed suit and stood in front of Jack, who had risen in alarm. "And you've got the nerve to come here! Twist, you filthy little-"

"That's enough!" Ennis shot at him, keeping Jack behind him. He would not let Jack get hurt. "It was an accident and we've made our peace with it. I thought you had a right to know."

"You expect us to accept this?" Sarah asked; she was trying to calm her husband but looked equally angry. Ennis's shoulders sagged a little.

"Don't know why I should...you wouldn't even come to our wedding. You just ignored the invitation." He felt Jack's hand on his back.

"We didn't want to see you throw your life away. And now you have, so..." Sarah shook her head.

"I need a smoke," Keith muttered, grabbing a box from the coffee table and heading out. Ennis looked confused.

"Since when does he smoke?" he asked his mother, who looked distressed.

"Since he's stressed..." Ennis looked around; there were no ashtrays anywhere that indicated cigarette use. "Electronic," she informed him, but there was something in her tone that told him she was holding back. He had finally let go of Jack now that his father was out of the room, but he was still wary. "Ennis...we can't accept the...person you chose as your partner. Not after this. Congratulations on your marriage and best of luck to you, but...I think it's best if you stay away in future."

Tears sprang to his eyes but he wouldn't give her the satisfaction. "Right." He thought he heard a banging sound from outside but thought nothing of it. "So...guess we'll go." His father entered the room again, but they said nothing as Ennis grabbed Jack's hand and led him out of the house.

When they were back in the car, Jack reached over and hugged him tightly. "It's okay, baby. I'm here." Ennis sniffed and held onto him, trying to keep it together. "Let's get back to the hotel," Jack murmured in his ear, and he nodded. He never noticed that his medical records were missing from the car, but they were driven from his mind as they headed back to the hotel.

* * *

Both of them were quiet on the way back to the hotel; Jack knew that Ennis was trying to deal with the fact that he'd basically been disowned, and that they had to try and keep going despite this. He drove them back, wishing that he could get them there quicker so that he could hold Ennis and make everything better.

At last, they reached the hotel and their room. Jack took his hand on the way upstairs and could sense that Ennis was struggling with what had just happened; he'd never expected it to be this bad. When the door was locked behind them, Jack turned to face Ennis; there were tears in his eyes and he was clearly reluctant to let them fall.

"Ennis...it's okay. You can let it all out now...you know I won't judge you," he said softly. He gently pulled Ennis into his arms and rubbed his back; soon he felt wetness on his neck from where Ennis had buried his face. "Let it out..." he soothed, knowing that Ennis couldn't bottle it all up; that never worked. Ennis trembled in his arms as he tried to calm down, so glad that he had Jack here.

"I shouldn't let it get to me," he mumbled, slightly annoyed with himself for not being stronger. Jack squeezed him.

"I understand...you've just been disowned. When my dad told me to keep away after being infected, I was a mess. I know what you're going through, bud..." He heard Ennis sniff a couple of times as he pulled away a little.

"Jack...can we, um...you know?" he asked quietly, peeking up at Jack unsurely. He needed comfort, the kind that only Jack could give. Jack nodded.

"Sure, come on. You want me to be on top?" he asked, stroking Ennis's cheek.

"You sure you can? You haven't topped since..." He trailed off, and Jack nodded.

"I'm sure...I know it's what you wanted to ask but you weren't sure if I would say yes, right?" They smiled at how well they knew each other and Jack lifted his chin. "Let's get into bed...I'll do whatever I can to help you."

They headed for the bed, not caring that it was still the middle of the day; they needed to do this. Jack knew that Ennis really wanted to be taken care of, but hadn't been sure of asking considering recent events. He personally felt as if he was ready to be on top again, and he wanted to do this for Ennis. They stripped off in silence and slid under the sheets together, glancing at each other nervously. Jack wondered if Ennis was up for this, given his emotional state. "You sure you wanna do this?" he murmured as they turned to face each other. Ennis nodded.

"I need to, Jack...I need you..." He swallowed and looked away, only looking into Jack's eyes when he moved closer. Jack leaned in and kissed him softly, gauging his response. When Ennis felt Jack's lips touch his, he knew that this would help. Jack could feel him trembling but they continued to kiss, reaching out for each other.

"Let me know when you're ready," he whispered into Ennis's ear, trailing a hand down to caress his lower stomach. Ennis was growing hard under his touch, and he pulled away for air.

"Jack..." he breathed, tugging at Jack's waist; that was their signal that they were ready for closer contact. Jack moved closer and slowly rolled on top of him, holding Ennis's face in his hands and settling in between his legs. "Darlin'..."

"I'm right here," Jack said to him, his eyes boring into Ennis's. "I'm not happy about the things they said, but...I know it hurts you more. Just relax and concentrate on this, okay?" He kissed Ennis a few more times, feeling something digging into his leg; at least Ennis was sure about this.

He took it slowly, only reaching for the lube when he was certain that Ennis was ready. Very gently, he spread Ennis's legs wider and worked his way inside. Ennis felt the pain that came with penetration but knew from experience that it was all worth it. Jack was being so tender with him that he felt emotion building up inside him again.

"You okay?" Jack breathed when he was inside, looking down at Ennis. He felt a pair of legs wrap around his hips and saw Ennis nod.

"Go on..." he whispered, eyes pleading with Jack to make love to him. "Do it..."

Jack kept his rhythm steady as he moved inside Ennis, careful not to go too fast or get carried away. It wasn't so much about pleasure as it was about comfort, but that was okay; sometimes they needed comfort sex with each other.

"Ennis..." Jack sighed as they rocked together, kissing deeply. He could feel Ennis shaking in his arms but knew it would be alright; he would look after him. Ennis was unusually silent as Jack moved within him, but he couldn't really say anything with the lump in his throat. Emotion was bubbling close to the surface now and he knew he wouldn't be able to hold it back for long.

"Jack," he choked out, groaning when he came. Jack soon followed him into orgasm and then sank down, sighing in contentment. It wasn't the most passionate sex they'd ever had, but it did what they'd needed it to.

Jack heard a sob escape from above him and he looked up in alarm. "Ennis?"

"I...just..." Ennis tried to wipe the tears away but he was too emotional after what had happened. To have this wonderful man with him after his parents' reaction was sending him over the edge. Jack seemed to understand; he crawled up and pulled Ennis close, kissing him on the neck and covering him with his warmth.

"Shh...it's okay. I'm not going anywhere. Let it all out, baby...I'm right here." Ennis held onto Jack and didn't stop crying until he fell asleep, leaving Jack fuming at Ennis's parents for doing this to the man he loved.

* * *

_September 23rd, 2012_

On the Sunday, Ennis and Jack were packing up to go home. The trip had been hard for both of them, but Jack knew that Ennis was suffering more. He hadn't appreciated the insult that Ennis's father had almost thrown at him, but to be honest it didn't bother him too much; he'd half-expected it anyway. He was more angry on Ennis's behalf; he'd been disowned by the people who ought to love and support him no matter what, and now it was weighing heavily on his heart.

They had agreed not to let it get to them, but that was proving to be harder than they'd thought. Still, Ennis had thanked Jack for his comfort the night before. He had tried to explain his emotional state without getting worked up again, and Jack soon had the gist of what he was trying to say. The meeting with his parents had upset him and made him doubt himself, and then to have Jack's unconditional love had increased his emotional state because he'd realised just how lucky he was.

"You alright?" he asked Ennis as they packed their suitcases on the bed. Ennis nodded.

"Better than last night...but I'm really glad you were there, bud. If I'd been on my own, I probably would've called you but it's not the same. I needed you here and...I'm glad you were."

Jack smiled at him. "I'm just glad I could help. I don't care what they say to me; I was more worried about you."

Ennis nodded. "Right..." He then looked around. "By the way, have you seen my medical records? I can't find them..."

"Where did you see them last?"

"I brought them with us in the car when we went to my parents' house, but I checked the car earlier when I went to return it and they're not in there anymore."

"You never said you were bringing them," Jack observed. "How come you didn't tell me?"

Ennis shrugged. "On the drive up, I figured it wouldn't make any difference to have them with us, so I didn't think it mattered. You mad at me?" he asked, looking at Jack warily. Jack smiled and shook his head.

"No...can't be mad at you. And it makes sense. But you said you can't find them now?"

"No, can't see them anywhere." Jack shrugged.

"Maybe you already packed them and didn't think about it. Let's face it; you're not feeling at your best right now and probably can't concentrate."

Ennis nodded. "Yeah, maybe..." But he couldn't shake off a nagging feeling that he'd missed something. There was something not right about all of this and he couldn't work it out. Maybe Jack was right, but he wasn't sure. Even if the records had been lost, it wouldn't be the end of the world; there were no contact details on them and no chance of identity theft. It would simply have his name and the diagnosis on there. People out here might recognise the name from when he lived here, but it didn't really matter.

When they were packed and ready to leave, Ennis sat down on the edge of the bed and sighed, hands on either side of his neck as he stared at the floor. Jack crawled onto the bed behind him, arms snaking around his stomach. "Love you," he murmured, not really knowing what else to say. Ennis smiled and leaned back into the embrace.

"I love you too, bud. Thank you for being here..." Jack smiled at him.

"No problem. When we get back...we've got to concentrate on what we're doing. Our adoption application, remember? We've got to carry on as best we can and we both know that."

"I know. Got a lot to do, right? Reckon it might distract us well enough."

"Yep. Come on, or we'll miss the plane..." They kissed a couple of times before getting up and starting to leave. If any good had come from this trip, it was that they'd both realised how close they really were and how nothing could come between them. Maybe they had achieved something after all.

Ennis was wondering about his records and where they had got to; he couldn't for the life of him figure out where they were and couldn't remember packing them. Maybe Jack was right and he had done so without thinking about it, but he had a very bad feeling that something was wrong. But as he sat in the taxi with Jack's hand in his own, he knew he couldn't dwell on it for too long.

There was the usual waiting around at the airport, but they were used to it by now and continued to look through their photo album to cheer themselves up. At one point, Jack held Ennis close and told him that nothing could break them apart now; they were so much stronger than that.

"I love you so much," he murmured when they were alone. "I just...I'm in love with you and I hope that you can see why..."

Ennis was playing with his fingers, feeling unsure of himself. "I do try, Jack. But I can't always see why you chose me...I'm nothing special..." Jack put his hand over Ennis's mouth.

"Don't say that; you are special, to me. You're a good man who deserves to be happy and I hope I'm the one who can make you happy for the rest of your life." He smiled. "You sure do make me happy, you know. Just think...we're not thirty yet. We've got so many years ahead of us, even with the virus. Just think of everything that's to come for us; so many good things, starting with this baby we're gonna adopt."

Ennis nodded. "You know...when we were in Mill Valley I was looking at the houses. One day, maybe we could move out of the city and live in a house in the suburbs, with our kid."

Jack grinned, images of such an idyllic life dancing in his head. "That sounds perfect," he replied, leaning in to kiss his other half.


	11. Chapter 11

_Author's notes_

_Please don't hate me for the end of this chapter!_

_Kathryn_

* * *

**Chapter 11**

Jack noticed how quiet Ennis was being, but he knew that his partner was thinking everything over and he was happy to let Ennis figure things out for himself.

When they got back to the apartment from the airport, Jack led the way inside and turned to Ennis. "You okay?" he asked, and Ennis shrugged.

"I dunno...just a lot to take in. Not really sure how to deal with this."

"Right...tell you what. We'll sit down and talk this whole thing out. You want a drink?" he offered, and Ennis nodded. Jack got them both a drink and they sat down on the sofa; he curled his legs behind him and turned so that he was looking at Ennis. "Okay...tell me what you're thinking..."

Ennis sighed. "I just...even after everything that's happened, I hoped that they could realise I'm still the same person even though I'm now positive. As my parents, I thought they were supposed to support me in all of my decisions, including who I choose to be with. But...they obviously can't accept me being with you."

"Yeah. I'm sorry about all this, Ennis. You know I never wanted to make things like this between you guys. I know how it feels, so...I never wanted it for you."

Ennis looked at him. "It's not your fault, Jack. They're just...more narrow-minded than I thought. They were fine when I came out, or so I thought. But being with someone who's positive...they sure don't like that."

"You've gotta look at it from their point of view," Jack reasoned. He couldn't believe that he was doing this. "I'm not trying to defend them, because they don't deserve it. But I understand why they treat me the way they do. You're their only child, and they just want to protect you. They know that people can die from the virus and I bet they're worried for you. So now that you have it, maybe they think there's no point in trying anymore, and that's why your mom said not to come back."

"So they've given up on me," Ennis replied quietly, staring at the floor. "Thanks..." Jack sighed; he didn't want to fight.

"Hey, come on. You know I'm not trying to hurt you by saying this; I'd never do that. I'm trying to help you by getting you to understand. Maybe then it won't hurt so much." He ran his fingers through Ennis's curls, liking how soft they always were. "Ennis, look at me." Brown eyes met his own. "The last thing I want is for us to fight about this; we have to stick together now. Remember that you're not alone, okay? You've got me, and my mom and even Lureen's always there for us if we wanna talk to her."

He shuffled closer and looked deep into Ennis's eyes. "You're not alone, baby. And you never will be now you've got me. I love you."

Ennis smiled; he could always count on Jack to put things in perspective and make him feel better. Jack was just trying to help him. "Come here." Jack grinned and straddled him, his folded legs on either side of Ennis and fingers caressing his hair. "How did I end up with someone so smart, huh?"

Jack leaned forward and nuzzled his nose. "Maybe 'cos he was smart enough to pick you in the first place." He lowered his head and captured Ennis's lips, pushing his tongue inside. They kissed slowly, not needing to rush along. Sometimes they were satisfied with just making out, and that was fine. Their tongues slid against each other as Ennis rested his hands on Jack's hips, tugging the shirt from Jack's jeans. His hands slipped underneath and caressed Jack's warm skin, making his partner sigh into his mouth. Ennis felt Jack's muscles move in his back as they kissed, loving how firm they were. He didn't really understand how another man's body could appeal to him so much, but he had accepted it a long time ago. Maybe it wasn't because Jack was a man, but because the man was _Jack_.

Ennis sometimes looked at Jack and just knew that they were supposed to be together. He believed in fate and soul mates, especially now. Jack was his other half; there was no other explanation as to why he felt so complete when they were together.

"You're thinking again," Jack murmured, pulling his lips away slightly. "What's on your mind?"

"You," Ennis replied simply, smiling when Jack's cheeks reddened.

"Really?" Ennis nodded.

"Yep. About how damn lucky I am to have you, and just...how we're meant for each other," he said, looking up into Jack's eyes. "And you were right...I can't let it get to me when we've got so much to look forward to. I wanna spend the rest of my life with you, Jack. And when we die, if there's something after that then I wanna be with you still. Forever, if we can."

Jack smiled down at him. "Nothing would make me happier, Ennis." He thought for a moment. "Wonder which of us will go first...?" Ennis held his face in his hands, the way that Jack always liked.

"Don't think like that," he said softly. "We'll only go upsetting each other if we do that. Whoever goes first...we'll eventually be back together, I know we will." Jack smiled and moved forward into his arms, embracing him tightly. He knew that whoever died first, the other would be left heartbroken. Was it possible to die of a broken heart? He didn't know, but he was aware that if he was the one left behind he wouldn't last long. Part of him would die with Ennis and he would soon be following.

Still, he knew that Ennis was right; it was an upsetting subject and he couldn't allow it to invade his thoughts, not when they were trying to hold each other up after their ill-fated visit. They had each other right now and that was all that mattered.

* * *

_September 25th, 2012_

On Tuesday, Ennis and Jack had their day off and decided to stay at home together; neither of them felt much like going out anywhere. When they were trying to recover from something difficult, they often wished to just be alone together.

Jack had already spoken to Lureen about the visit to Mill Valley; she had been shocked and disgusted by the reaction from Ennis's parents and offered to go up there to tell them off.

"_There's no point, Lu," Jack said to her over the phone, grateful for the support but not wanting her to put herself in the line of fire. "They've made their minds up."_

"_But they've just ruined any chance they had of being a part of Ennis's life from now on, including the baby you guys wanna adopt. It'll be their grandchild and they've cut themselves off."_

Jack had agreed with her, but he maintained that it was their decision and they would just have to accept it. As much as he wanted to punish Ennis's parents for hurting their son in this way, it wouldn't achieve anything. He had to pick up the pieces and try to comfort Ennis as best he could.

One thing bugging Ennis right now was his missing medical record. After they'd unpacked, he had been expecting to find it somewhere and yet it was still missing. He'd even called the rental car company to see if it had been located in the car and handed in, but there was nothing. A phone call to the hotel also led to a dead end; the record had just vanished. He tried to think what might have happened to it, but he was getting nowhere. At one point he had started to become convinced that he was going crazy and had imagined even taking them to California, but Jack assured him that it had been real; he could remember Ennis taking them.

They were lying on the sofa together, Jack lying on Ennis's chest. The TV was on and they were half-watching it, but mostly were just enjoying the intimacy between them. Even when they weren't having sex, they still felt very close and were somehow joined together in a different way.

"God, Ennis...I could lie here forever," Jack sighed, smiling to himself with his eyes closed. Ennis threaded his fingers through Jack's silky hair. He was propped up against the arm of the sofa with a cushion behind his head and their legs were tangled together at the other end.

"Me too...so peaceful..." Jack raised his head to look up at Ennis, looking thoughtful.

"I was thinking...when we adopt, do we care about the sex of the baby? I know that when a woman gets pregnant, sometimes they wanna know and sometimes they don't. Do we wanna know?"

Ennis thought it over. "Would help with planning and decorating," he reasoned. The spare room would hopefully become a nursery one day and part of him was looking forward to decorating it. That was another project they could work on together. "It might be a good idea for us to pick which one we want."

"How would we decide? Which do you want?"

"I don't know," he replied honestly; he hadn't given it much thought. "If we have a girl, though...we'd need to have a woman on hand to teach her about...woman stuff." His cheeks reddened and Jack grinned. "Your mom could do that, though. And Lureen would be a good role model when she's here."

"Maybe having a boy would be easier," Jack mused. His eyes then darkened as he realised what certain people might say about two gay men wanting to adopt a boy; it didn't bear thinking about. He thought wryly that Ennis's parents might be amongst such people who would say that.

His thoughts were interrupted by his phone ringing; it was his mother. Not wanting to leave his comfortable position, Jack answered it right there. "Hey, Mom."

"Hi honey...I just wanted to ask how things went with Ennis's parents. You didn't call, so I was starting to worry." Jack felt guilty for not contacting her sooner, considering how much she wanted to help them.

"Yeah, sorry. Um...well, we told them. And they weren't exactly happy about it. His dad looked like he wanted to hit me, but then he sort of stormed out of the house. Then his mom said...that..." He glanced at Ennis, who nodded. "She said it would be best if we didn't go over there anymore. They don't want anything to do with him now."

"Oh, Jack...how's he taking it?"

"He was upset, but...I think he'll be okay. I'm doing everything I can to make him happy and we're just spending the day at home now." His hand found Ennis's, squeezing gently.

"Alright. Do you want me to call them and try to help?" she offered. Jack smiled weakly.

"No...Lureen already offered. I appreciate it, but it's our problem. We don't want anybody else getting involved like that; you don't deserve to be treated like this any more than we do."

"Okay. Is Ennis there? Can I talk to him?" Jack handed Ennis the phone and watched with a smile; he was so happy that his mother accepted Ennis the way she did.

"Hey, Karen...yeah, I'm fine. Wasn't easy, but I've got Jack...yeah, I know. Look, don't worry, we'll be fine. Alright...yep, bye." He gave the phone back, and Jack bid goodbye to his mother before hanging up. He resumed his usual position, Ennis's chest providing a comfortable pillow.

"You comfy there?" Ennis asked, looking amused. Jack nodded.

"Yep...could fall asleep on you." He let out a deep sigh of contentment, reminding Ennis of a cat. "Mmm..."

"Go right ahead," Ennis told him. "I don't mind." He too was very comfortable with Jack lying there; it was just the two of them and he liked that. "Love you so much," he murmured, planting a kiss in Jack's hair. Jack smiled and squeezed him.

"Right back at you, bud."

* * *

That night, Jack knew that he would have to try and help Ennis relax. They had been through a lot lately and he just wanted them to have a passionate night together where they could forget everything else.

When they entered the bedroom, Jack turned to Ennis and took his hands. "Ennis...try not to think about it, alright? I know you feel bad about your parents, but just remember that you've still got me, okay?"

"Yeah," Ennis replied, nodding. Jack leaned in and kissed him, keeping it gentle for now. "Jack..." he sighed. "Don't know what I'd do without you..."

Jack nuzzled him. "You don't have to worry about that, baby. Come on...let's get under the covers..." They went to their respective sides of the bed, casting furtive glances at each other as they undressed. This was one of their favourite times of the day, when they were about to make love together.

When Jack was settling himself on his back, he felt Ennis press close to him, kissing his neck. "Hey...you want something there?" he asked with a smile. He saw Ennis's eyes looking at him in the semi-darkness, full of need.

"Jack...can we...? I mean..." He bit his lip and Jack cupped his cheek.

"Sure...anything you want, bud. Tell me what you want..." Ennis nuzzled Jack's face with his own, clearly feeling emotional.

"Want you inside me," he breathed. "Can we do it on our sides? Remember that way?" Jack nodded.

"Yeah, okay...I'll take care of you," he promised, running a hand over his partner's hip. Ennis nodded and kissed him again, feeling vulnerable. Jack could see now how their positions had changed from when Ennis had been diagnosed; now he could be there for Ennis. They had a fair and balanced relationship that still surprised him even now, and were equals in every way.

After a few minutes, Jack could sense that Ennis was ready. "Turn over," he whispered in Ennis's ear, nudging him with his hand. Ennis felt so safe here with Jack, as if nothing could hurt him. He knew that Jack often looked to him for protection and the feeling of safety, but he'd never really told Jack that sometimes he needed it too.

With Ennis facing away from him on his other side, Jack pressed soft kisses to the back of his neck as he prepared himself. "Just relax," he murmured, and he saw Ennis nod. Jack rose up and slid one leg in between Ennis's, giving him a better angle as he started to push in. He heard a low groan and kept his movement slow, knowing that Ennis sometimes needed a moment to adjust.

Jack whispered soothing words in his lover's ear as he kept going, promising Ennis that everything would be alright. When he was fully inside, he held Ennis around the middle and felt his heart rate slow down as they relaxed. "Tell me when you're ready," he said softly, caressing Ennis's lower stomach. Ennis trembled under such gentle touches, knowing that he was very much loved.

At Ennis's nod, Jack started moving slowly. He thrust into Ennis as gently as he could, wanting to provide comfort more than anything else. He loved it when they went slowly, for they could experience every moment without feeling the need to rush things along. And he figured that it was better right now considering how Ennis was feeling; he didn't need Jack to go at him right now.

"I love you," Jack whispered in his ear. "I'll always love you, Ennis. You'll never feel alone as long as I'm here, I promise. You and me...that's sticking. Okay?"

"Yeah," Ennis managed to reply, bucking when he felt Jack's hand wander a bit lower down his body. "Love you, Jack..."

Jack kissed the base of his neck, right on the collarbone. As he kept moving inside Ennis, he kissed his way up the smooth skin of Ennis's neck and to his jaw, eliciting a low moan from the man underneath him. "God...you're so beautiful," he murmured, gently biting Ennis's earlobe. "Every part of you...amazing..."

Ennis bit his lip as he felt Jack's fingers lightly brush against his erection, needing to be touched. "Jack...please...jerk me off..." He groaned when Jack obliged him, taking a firm hold and sliding his hand along. Being taken from behind while also being touched like this was sending volts through Ennis's body; how on earth Jack just knew what he needed most was beyond him. "Jack...oh God..."

Jack pressed his lips to Ennis's ear, giving a hard thrust into him. "Come for me, baby."

That did it; Ennis started shooting onto the bed beneath them, shaking as he came with Jack still thrusting into him. Soon enough, they were both spent and Jack had collapsed onto Ennis's back, breathing deeply.

"Oh, Ennis..." he sighed, kissing him between the shoulders. "Are you okay?" He pulled out and turned Ennis over to face him, hoping that Ennis wasn't upset again; that had hurt to see him so miserable. To his relief, Ennis was smiling and clearly happy.

"Yeah, I'm good," he replied breathlessly. He reached out for Jack's hands and squeezed his fingers, feeling happier than he had in a few days. "Thanks, Jack...you know it means a lot to me that you're willing to do things like this."

"I don't just do it for you," Jack told him. "I mean, I like being able to make you feel better, but I get something out of it too. I see how I'm making you feel and it lets me know that I'm doing something right. You see? I like being there for you, Ennis."

Ennis lifted his head to kiss him, drawing Jack further down onto him. They kissed slowly, now embracing in the afterglow. Ennis held Jack close, feeling as if Jack could fix everything just by being there. He knew that he would get through what had happened as long as Jack was here with him. Ennis hoped that he would never lose this wonderful man.

* * *

_September 27th, 2012_

On Thursday, Ennis and Jack had an appointment with their lawyer during their lunch break. They had been reading through everything he had given them about adoption and were now ready to go about it. To them, it was both scary and exciting.

Ennis had been doing a lot of thinking over the week, and he had ultimately decided to let things go where his parents were concerned. The only way that they might want anything to do with him ever again was if he left Jack and returned home, and that was never going to happen. Even if they did break up, Ennis was sure his parents still wouldn't want to know because he was positive now and there was no cure.

He had loved his parents once, but they had hurt him deeply by refusing to accept his relationship with Jack and now he was content with never seeing them again; they had decided this and there was nothing he could do about it; he never wanted to put himself or Jack through that again.

Jack could read him very well by now, and he knew that while Ennis had been hurt by his parents' rejection, he figured it was probably for the best that they cut ties; they were never going to accept this. He would always be there for Ennis whenever he was needed; that was the basis of their relationship, to be there for each other and keep things together.

They were sat in Peter's office together when he came in, looking happy to see them. "So, how are you guys getting on?" he asked as he sat down. Jack smiled at Ennis.

"Well, we've been reading all that stuff you gave us. And...we've been talking it over. We're ready to get things started," Jack replied.

"Okay," Peter answered, rummaging through the filing cabinet. "Ennis, how did it go with your parents?"

Ennis sighed. "Not good. My dad looked like he wanted to hit Jack and my mom told us to stay away from now on." He felt a lump in his throat and then Jack squeezing his fingers.

Peter shook his head. "No parent should do that to their child, no matter what the circumstances. I'm sorry you had to go through that, Ennis."

"It's okay...I've still got this guy," he replied, holding up his and Jack's joined hands with a smile. Peter nodded his approval at this.

"That's certainly something to remember. Now then...your first task is...I would say think of someone to write a letter of recommendation. This would go in your file and would be taken into consideration when you are assessed."

"Who should write it?"

"Ideally someone who has known you for a long time, who knows that you would make good parents. It can be a close family member or a friend; we're allowed to be biased here as long as this person truly knows you. Then I would advise you to make sure your apartment is suitable for a child. I understand you have a guest room that you want to turn into a nursery?"

"Yep, that's what we were thinking of," Ennis replied, nodding. "Hopefully, one day."

"Good. That will show that you have thought this through extensively. Now then, as for your HIV status..."

"You said before it wouldn't work against us..." Jack pointed out, hoping that he hadn't heard wrong.

"And it won't as long as you can prove that the appropriate measures are in place. Your medication would have to be somewhere that a child wouldn't be able to access easily, and you would have to be certain that you are in otherwise good health; talking to your doctor will get this sorted. You can have written proof that considering the circumstances, you're still relatively healthy."

"What about the time I was in hospital?" Jack asked unsurely. "Will that come up? Will they see me as too risky?"

"I shouldn't think so; you've been fine since then and it was a few years ago. One thing that will help is the fact that you're married. It shows that you are fully committed to each other and to any child that you take on. I am aware that there are many same-sex couples in the world who cannot marry, but are still committed to each other. They would probably have a harder time trying to adopt, so you two are very lucky."

Ennis nodded. "So we can prove that we can give a stable home?" he asked, and Peter nodded.

"Pretty much. I've known you two for a while now, even before you came to live here. I'm certain that you would make good parents; you're very dedicated to making this happen and seem determined to build a good life together. If it were up to me, you'd be on the waiting list already."

Ennis and Jack smiled at this, glad that they had good friends on their side. "So...we need to sort out a letter of recommendation, then we can start to put things together?"

"Yeah, that's it. Let me know when you have one, or if you have any further queries. Ennis, try not to worry about your parents. Considering the kind of guys you two are, I'd say it's their loss and not yours." They thanked him and left the office, feeling better than before. When they got outside, Jack stretched and looked around, feeling hungry.

"Well...we've got time for lunch, if you want." Ennis nodded and took his hand again.

"Yep. Come on, bud." They walked down the street together in search of somewhere to eat, enjoying the warm weather while it lasted. Fall would be coming soon with winter not far behind, so they wanted to make the most of summer. Even without his parents, Ennis knew that life would go on and that he would be happy. He had to let go and concentrate on the family he wanted with Jack; that was all that mattered now.

* * *

After work, Ennis and Jack returned home together. On the subway, they talked about who they might ask to write the letter for them; the only person they could think of was Jack's mother, who knew them both well. Lureen would be a good candidate, but she was far away and they needed to get started as soon as possible.

"So then all we have to do is make sure the apartment's tidy," Jack was saying as they entered their home. It was of a decent size, but he was thinking over Ennis's suggestion of them moving out of the city one day to a house. It sounded like a perfect life, the kind he'd always wanted.

"Guess so," Ennis replied, stretching. "What d'you want for dinner, bud?"

"I don't feel like cooking," Jack admitted, shrugging. "Maybe we could order take-out?" Ennis agreed and was soon phoning the local pizza place; sometimes they just couldn't make the effort after a long day.

When he'd placed the order, he sat down next to Jack on the sofa and curled an arm around him. "Mmm...glad to be home," he murmured, pressing his lips to Jack's cheek. Jack grinned.

"Me too, bud. Looks like we've got a lot to sort out with this adoption thing. We should put our meds somewhere out of sight and reach; they're just on the shelf right now."

"Maybe we should get one of those medicine cabinets," Ennis suggested. "Put it on the wall instead of the mirror. They have mirrors on them, right?" Jack nodded and they watched TV until their food came. Although they did end up making out for a few minutes before the buzzer went off.

"So...you've definitely decided you don't wanna talk to your parents again?" Jack asked as they ate, looking over at Ennis. His partner shook his head.

"No, not after all that. We've always made the effort and got nothing back. We were always the ones going up there to see them, even crossing the country to try and build bridges. And we invited them to the wedding...they've never even tried to get to know you, not after I first told them that you're positive. So if they can't accept it, we'll just have to try and live with that."

Jack felt saddened that Ennis was cutting his parents out of his life, but it was his decision and Jack could understand why he was doing it. Even if they ever did change their minds, Jack had a feeling that Ennis wouldn't respond to them now; the damage was done.

"It'll be alright," he said to Ennis, smiling. "It's their loss...they're the ones who'll be missing out, not you." Ennis smiled back at him and continued to eat.

Ennis was washing up when the buzzer went off, and Jack went to answer it.

"Jack Twist?" came a voice at the other end.

"Yes," Jack replied, feeling confused.

"This is the police, Mr Twist. Please could you let us up?"

"Um, sure..." Jack buzzed them in and turned to face Ennis. "What's going on?" Ennis shook his head.

"No idea..." There was a banging knock on the door; even without the buzzer system, Jack knew that only the police knocked like that.

"Hello?" he asked when he opened the door. "Can I help you?"

"You're under arrest, Mr Twist," said one of the policemen, and Jack's eyes widened.

"What? What for?" he asked, flinching when a pair of handcuffs were slapped on him. Ennis rushed to his side.

"What are you doing? Why are you arresting him?"

"Jack Twist," said the policeman, directly facing Jack. "I'm arresting you on suspicion of attempted murder. You have the right to remain silent but anything you do say can be used against you in a court of law. You have the right to an attorney during questioning."

"Ennis," Jack said helplessly to his husband, eyes panicking as he was led away. He just couldn't go to prison, not when he was barely over what had happened to him all those years ago.

"Don't worry," Ennis said to him, trying to reassure him. "I'll be right there with help. Try to stay calm, bud." He watched as Jack was led down the stairs, wondering what the hell was going on. Jack would never try to kill anyone, not even when angry. It had to be a mix-up.

_Stay calm yourself, _he thought, trying to keep it together. _Call Peter. _Ennis reached into his pocket for his phone and grabbed his keys, knowing that he had to get Jack out of there. He knew that Jack wouldn't be sent to prison right away, and would only be in a holding cell which he could be bailed from. But such a serious allegation was bound to involve a trial. This was the last thing they needed.

He headed down the stairs and dialled their lawyer's number. It was out of office hours by now but they needed his help. "Peter, it's Ennis Del Mar," he said as he walked quickly down the road; the police station was a few streets away.

"Ennis? What's wrong?"

"It's Jack. We just had the police at our front door; they've arrested Jack on suspicion of attempted murder and they took him to the station, the one just off Court Street. Can you get here?" Fortunately, Peter also lived in Brooklyn Heights and closer to the station than himself.

"I'll be there as soon as I can. It's probably just a mix-up." Ennis thanked him and continued walking, hoping that he was right. He'd heard the stories of what happened in prisons, especially to gay men; he just couldn't let Jack go through that kind of pain again.

Something popped up at the back of his mind, a reason as to why this had happened if it wasn't a mistake. There was only one reason he could think of and two people who would do this, and if he was right then he was never going to forgive them.


	12. Chapter 12

**Chapter 12**

When Ennis finally got to the station, Jack was nowhere to be seen. But he did spot Peter at the front desk inquiring about Jack and asking to be let in to represent him. The police did say that Jack had the right to have his lawyer there.

"I'm his lawyer and he has the right to attorney," Peter was saying. The man at the front desk nodded, but didn't look happy about it. Ennis could tell that he didn't like it when someone challenged his authority, and he didn't like people like that.

"Peter!" Ennis called as he approached. He turned, looking relieved. He had heard some things since his arrival and he had an idea of what was going on; Jack wouldn't get out of this on his own.

"Hey, Ennis. I'm gonna go in there now and I'll find out what I can. He's being questioned right now but he's asking for me. I'm glad you called right away." He sighed. "It looks bad...such a serious accusation as this usually goes to trial."

"But why is he being accused in the first place?" Ennis asked, feeling confused. "He'd never try to kill anybody. And it's not a mix-up?" He hoped that his suspicions weren't true; it would be just awful for them and he would have to cut his parents off for good.

Peter shook his head ruefully. "No, doesn't look like it. Look, I have to get in there and find out what's going on."

"Does he need bailing out? Will they try to hold him?" Ennis asked; he would do whatever it took to get Jack out as soon as possible.

"The bail's at two thousand dollars, and that's the only way to get him out tonight. You can pay at the front desk." Ennis nodded and watched helplessly as Peter went off to the interrogation rooms. He sat down in a nearby chair, still in shock. He didn't have a clue what was going on, but he hoped that Jack would be okay. He wished that he could be in there for moral support, but not even a marriage license could do that. All he could hope for was that Peter managed to sort this out.

All Ennis had ever wanted was to protect Jack, but this was out of his hands. He wasn't a lawyer and couldn't help Jack that way. But when Jack was released, Ennis would take care of him then and support him no matter what.

He sat there waiting for a few minutes before deciding to call Karen; he needed to hear a friendly voice right now. He dialled her number and waited, keeping an eye out for Peter. Hopefully this would be over soon, when they realised that the accusations were false; there was surely no evidence.

"Ennis? That you?" She was clearly tired and he didn't like to disturb her, but he didn't know who else to call; Lureen would still be at work.

"Karen...something's happened. It's really bad."

"What's wrong? Where's Jack?"

"He's been arrested...someone's accused him of attempted murder. I don't know..."

"Oh my God! Why? He'd never do that!"

"I know...I called our lawyer; he's in the interrogation room with Jack now at the station. I don't know what to do..."

"Okay, calm down. Do you have to pay bail?"

"Yep, two thousand. We've got the money we were gonna pay Lureen; she won't need to take it now."

"I'm sure it'll be okay. Do you want me to come down?"

Ennis considered it, but she was far away. "No...this might not take long and you're far away. We've got Peter; we can deal with this. Besides, if I can bail him out then I can take him home tonight. But Peter says that there's gonna be a trial..." This would cause them a lot of stress and they would need her help at some point.

"Oh God. Do you have any idea why this happened?" she asked. Ennis sighed inwardly, knowing that she wouldn't like this.

"I've got one idea...but I hope I'm wrong. I think my parents are behind this." It was the only thing he could think of, not least because of the timing. It was just too convenient not to be them.

"You think so? But how?"

"Because Jack infected me. When someone transmits the virus on purpose, isn't that classed as attempted murder?" He had read that somewhere but he'd never thought that would be a problem for them.

"Yeah, I think so. But it was an accident..."

"We know that, and I'm sure they know that. But...this means they did it out of spite," he replied, feeling betrayed.

"Oh, Ennis...this is terrible! Just when you guys are getting back on track...what'll happen now? If Jack is found guilty, he'll go to prison for sure. They'll...hurt him in there."

"I know, and that's what's worrying me the most. It'll destroy him, Karen..." Ennis felt a lump in his throat and looked around, trying to keep his composure.

"Ennis, try not to worry. Maybe you could call your parents and try to get them to stop?"

"Yeah, maybe. Um...I'll call you when I know something, alright?"

"Okay. Good luck, Ennis."

"Yep, bye." He hung up and took a deep breath, glancing down the corridor; there was no sign of Peter or Jack.

After a while, he dialled his parents' home number; there was no answer, which he'd half-expected.

"It's Ennis. I'm sure you know why I'm calling and I know you're behind this. Please, stop this right now; Jack doesn't deserve this from you. I know you can't accept me loving him but you don't have to do this. Call me back and we can talk." He hung up and sighed, standing up to stretch his legs. He couldn't pay the bail until they were done questioning Jack, and that could take hours. He looked at his watch; it was almost seven by now. This was going to be a long night.

* * *

Jack was trying not to panic, but this was difficult when he was handcuffed to a table in an interrogation room. They were treating him as if he was guilty even though nothing had been proven. He was aware that it was a serious crime, but they had no proof as far as he knew.

"Okay, Mr Twist," said a man who was clearly an Inspector. Jack felt very intimidated. "I think it's time to talk."

"They said I had a right to attorney," Jack pointed out, wondering where Peter was; he had a feeling that Ennis would have called him right away. He knew in his heart that Ennis would be doing everything he could to sort this out; Ennis wouldn't leave him like this.

"I'm sure he'll be here soon," the other man replied, sounding unconcerned.

"Alright...so what's all this about attempted murder?" Jack asked, feeling confused. "That doesn't make any sense." Anybody who knew him would know that he would never commit such a crime; he just didn't have it in him.

"Well, we have received a formal accusation, and given its nature we have to treat it seriously. I'm afraid you'll have to co-operate. So..." He flicked through his notes. "I understand you are married to Ennis Del Mar, is that correct?"

"Yeah. What's he got to do with this?"

"And...I understand that you are HIV-positive?" Jack nodded. "It says here that you infected your partner just over three weeks ago?"

"That's true, but why...?"

"Did you do it on purpose?" the Inspector asked, interrupting him. Jack's eyes widened.

"What? No, of course not! It was an accident." He was starting to piece things together; something wasn't right here.

"Mr Twist...the intentional transmission of the virus constitutes the accusation you have received; attempted murder. It will be a lot easier if you tell the truth, considering your situation."

Jack sighed. "I am telling the truth. Look, I don't know who's behind this, but it was an accident. I would never infect anybody on purpose. Why would I infect my partner?"

"Did you force him into unprotected sexual intercourse?" the Inspector pressed. Jack looked affronted; there was no way he would ever do that to Ennis.

"No! That's how I was infected in the first place, so there's no way I would do that to someone else!" He tugged at the handcuffs, wanting to leave. "Where's my lawyer?"

There was a knock at the door and to his relief; Peter appeared. "Sorry I'm late, Jack...I set off as soon as Ennis called me. I'm his lawyer," he said to the Inspector, who nodded. "What's going on?"

"Mr Twist here stands accused of the attempted murder of his husband, by way of intentionally transmitting the HIV virus to him without his consent. This, as you know, is an extremely serious matter."

Peter sat down next to Jack, making him feel a little calmer. At least now he had someone in here who was on his side. "Alright...can I ask just who is making these accusations?"

"Um...Keith and Sarah Del Mar from Mill Valley, California," the Inspector replied. Jack groaned; he'd had a feeling but hoped that he was wrong.

"Ennis's parents. I fucking knew it," he growled. Peter sighed; he too looked as if he'd figured it out.

"Inspector, Ennis Del Mar's parents have never approved of his relationship with Jack. Isn't it possible that this is being done out of pure spite?"

"Well, even so...it could be true."

"Where's your evidence?" Peter asked.

"Um, well..." He looked uncomfortable. "We don't have anything solid right now. But we have proof that Mr Del Mar was infected. And given how serious this is, we have to treat it as such."

"So what happens now? Surely without evidence you have to let me go," Jack pointed out.

"Mr Twist's partner is paying bail for him right now," Peter said, and Jack felt his heart lift; Ennis was close by and trying to help him. "With that, you can't hold him for even a night."

The Inspector didn't look happy about this, which told Jack that Peter was right. He was dreading going to prison, with all the tales of what happened in there to gay men. He just couldn't go through that again.

"Well...this will still go to trial, Mr Twist. More evidence could come up in the meantime, so...we'll be in touch about that." He reluctantly reached over and unlocked the handcuffs, and Jack sighed in relief. "Your trial date will be set, and both you and your partner will be required to attend."

Jack nodded. "Fine. I just wanna see him." The Inspector left the room, telling him he was free to go. They sat there for a moment. "I can't believe all this," Jack said. "To think that they would do this to us...all out of spite. But what proof can they possibly have that it was on purpose?" he asked.

Peter shook his head. "To be honest, none. Only Ennis can attest that it was accidental. And even if it was on purpose, there's no way you would force him. Which would mean it was done with his consent. They've got a very weak argument if you ask me."

"Bet they won't stop, though," Jack muttered, feeling resentful. "They've got it in for me now and...there's nothing I can do but try and fight them."

"Just remember that you're not alone, Jack. If we can counter them with an argument of our own, we'll win the trial. Just remember that Ennis is on your side, alright?" Jack nodded.

"Guess that's another thing we've got to work on," he replied. "What about our adoption application?" he asked. He was fearful that this would affect that.

Peter shook his head again. "It shouldn't have any effect if you're proven not guilty. It will go down as a false accusation and that'll be that." He gestured to the door. "Come on; Ennis is waiting for you." Jack nodded and stood up, looking forward to leaving.

* * *

Ennis was staring at the ceiling when he heard a wonderful sound; Jack's voice. He looked down the corridor and saw his partner standing there talking to Peter. "Jack!"

Jack turned and relief flooded his face. "Ennis..." He half-ran down the corridor and straight into Ennis's arms. "Thank God..." He was trembling after his ordeal and was so happy to be back here.

"Darlin'..." Ennis held him close, feeling how he was shaking and knowing how terrified he must have been. "It's okay now..."

Peter smiled at the reunion, but he was dreading how this would affect them. They were probably the strongest couple he knew and he hoped this wouldn't change that. "Ennis...there are things you ought to know."

Ennis looked at him from over Jack's shoulder. "What's going on?"

"Your parents are behind this, just as we thought." Ennis swore under his breath; he'd been right despite his hopes that he wasn't.

"Shit...so now what do we do?" he asked. Peter sighed.

"It's gonna go to trial, and both you and Jack would have to try and convince the jury that he's innocent."

"Alright. See, you can go now," Ennis said to Jack when they pulled apart, trying to make him feel better. Jack nodded. "I'm gonna take you home."

Jack sniffed and Ennis knew what was worrying him; the stories about what went on in prisons. Neither of them knew if it was true, but they didn't want to find out. "Ennis...I don't know what to do..."

"Shh..." Ennis held him close again, rubbing his back. "Look, how do we fight this?" he asked Peter.

"Well, you would simply have to prove that he's innocent. To be honest, I think your parents have a very weak argument; they have no proof that the infection was intentional. And it's like I said to Jack; even if it were, it would have been with your consent. Given how he was infected, it's highly unlikely that he would do the same to someone he loves."

"They could try arguing that it would make him more likely to do it himself," Ennis replied. "Trauma and everything..."

"Yeah, but all you have to do is talk to Jack to know that he's not the type to do this. And that is probably how you could win this trial; circumstantial evidence."

"What d'you mean?"

"Well, consider your relationship. It's not as if you didn't know that he was positive right from the start. You've known for a long time, and you're married. That says a lot if you ask me. And take into account how your parents never accepted him, never even tried to accept your relationship once they knew..."

"So we can prove that it was spite?" Ennis asked; he hadn't even known about such counter-arguments but he could see their way out of this.

"Hopefully. If we do this right, the jury and the judge will see that this was an attempt to punish an innocent man purely because they didn't like him."

"You hear that, bud?" Ennis asked, trying to peer into Jack's face. "What d'you think?"

Jack had listened to every word and the idea gave him hope. "I guess," he replied. "If it's our only chance then I'm all for it."

"Good. Listen...it's getting on now and I reckon we should all head home and get some rest, if we can. Jack, try not to worry too much," Peter said to him. "I'm sure this will all work out in our favour, okay? All we need to do is build up our counter-argument and we'll be set."

"Thank you," Jack said to him, shaking his hand. Ennis did the same and took Jack by the hand, squeezing it gently.

"Come on, bud." He led Jack out into the fresh air, hearing him sigh.

"How much was the bail?" Jack asked.

"Two thousand...I used the money we'd set aside to give to Lureen; reckon there's no better use for it now." He put his arm around Jack and they set off walking. "Were they...hard on you in there?" he asked softly. Jack nodded.

"Yeah...so much for 'innocent until proven guilty'. I think it's the other way around with them, the way they were questioning me. Asking me if I...forced you into sex without a condom, like I would ever do that to you..."

"I know," Ennis soothed, kissing his temple. "They don't know anything about us, Jack...they were just doing their job. But I reckon they should have at least got some solid evidence before arresting you."

"Yeah...why are your parents doing this?" Jack asked as they walked through the streets. "I mean...do they really hate me so much that they would rather see you hurt and alone without me?"

"I dunno," Ennis admitted. "I was willing to let this whole thing go, but now..." He sighed. "As soon as you were led away, I called Peter and got him to go to the station ahead of me. Then I left a message on my parents' phone; I told them that I knew they were behind this and I've asked them to stop. I don't think they will, but it's worth a shot." Jack nodded.

"I just can't believe this...just when we were getting back on track. What are we gonna do?"

"We'll just have to deal with it," Ennis replied; their apartment building was now in sight. "You wanna go straight to bed and get some sleep?"

"I need a shower," Jack said. "Feel all grimy after that. And I reckon we should talk this out," he added, and Ennis nodded; Jack needed to say what he was so afraid of, even though they both already knew what this was. He couldn't keep it bottled up.

Ennis only knew one thing; once this was over, he would never speak to his parents ever again. They had betrayed him, no matter if they had thought they were doing the right thing. He would do whatever it took to fight them.

* * *

Jack headed straight for the shower when they got back, and Ennis was happy to let him do whatever would make him feel better. He hated those people at the station for treating Jack like he was guilty, especially since there was no proof. He just didn't know how they would go about their counter-argument, but at least they had a good lawyer on their side.

He sat down and pulled out his phone, flicking through to Karen's number; he had promised to call her when he knew something. He didn't want her to get involved, though; he knew she would want to call his parents herself and shout at them, but this wouldn't achieve anything.

Ennis knew his parents well enough to know that they wouldn't let this go until they got what they wanted. He hoped that if he and Jack won the trial then his parents would leave them alone, but that was no guarantee. Even if they thought they were just trying to protect him, he hated what they were trying to do.

Hearing the shower start up, he dialled her number and waited. He would call Lureen another day, when things had settled down a little. As much as he and Jack loved her, she was too far away to really do anything, and Karen was close family.

"Ennis?"

"Hey...we just got back from the station. Turns out that my parents are behind this." Even just the thought of it made him angry; they were supposed to support all of his decisions but they clearly didn't want him to be with Jack. He would never give in just to make them happy.

"What? Why?" she asked, sounding confused.

"Because they never accepted me being with him once they found out about him having HIV. Now I've got it too, they probably think he should be punished for giving it to me."

"Oh God...this is awful! Are they holding him there?"

"No, I could bail him out. He's in the shower right now...he's taking this really hard."

"I'll bet. So what's gonna happen now?"

"Well, there'll be a trial because it's a serious accusation. And my parents are probably gonna try to find more evidence. But our lawyer reckons it's a weak argument because of our relationship and everything; that it's our best defence." It was the only chance they had of clearing Jack's name, and he hoped that it would work.

"Sounds about right. I mean, it's not as if you didn't know about him having it. And you two are in a loving, consensual relationship so it's not like he forced you. I'm sure it'll be fine."

"Yeah. Karen, I...have you ever heard the rumours about what happens in prisons, especially to gay guys?"

She sighed. "I think everybody's heard those rumours, to be honest. He's worried about that, isn't he?"

"Yeah...I can't let him go through that again. It's only happened once and look at the effect it still has on him. He still gets nightmares, for God's sake. For it to happen in there, where I can't protect him...it'll hurt us both and...we might not ever recover from it. My parents could ruin our lives and our marriage if they win this."

"So you have to make sure that they don't," she told him. "Listen to what Peter says and try to make your argument stronger than theirs. That's all you can really hope for, Ennis."

"Yeah." Ennis heard the shower stop. "I think he's finishing now, and we've got a lot to talk about. We'll speak soon, okay?"

"Okay. Tell Jack I love him."

"Will do, bye." He hung up and thought that Jack might want something to eat and drink; it had been a few hours since dinner and they had been under stress since then. Plus, they had to talk all of this out tonight.

As he started to put something together, his thoughts turned to how on earth his parents had managed to get Jack arrested. Whatever proof they had, it was clearly enough for the police to take seriously. But there was nothing to prove that Jack had transmitted the virus on purpose.

As if a film reel was playing before his eyes, his thoughts turned back to that day at his parents' house.

"_I need a smoke," Keith muttered, grabbing a box from the coffee table and heading out. _

"_Since when does he smoke?"_

"_Since he's stressed..." And then, "Electronic..."_

Ennis paused, thinking over this conversation. The box that his father had picked up from the table; he hadn't paid much attention to it. Had they been electronic cigarettes? His father hadn't smelled of smoke afterwards, so it could be likely. But then again, had his father even been stressed lately, before their visit? He couldn't see why, unless it was something unrelated.

_I'm missing something here, _he thought to himself, wracking his brains. _Something's not right..._

Then he remembered something else; a banging sound outside whilst talking to his mother. It was a quiet area, so it was a strange sound to hear. Now that he thought about it...

_A car door, _he realised. Then he remembered his conversation with Jack the morning after.

"_By the way, have you seen my medical records? I can't find them..."_

_Of course, _he realised, the truth hitting him like a ton of bricks. _I didn't see it sooner because I was so hurt by what they said. It's the only explanation! My dad stole the records from the car and now..._

His parents were using the proof of his infection to try and get Jack locked up. They had the perfect ammunition against him, but Ennis would not let them have the upper hand. They still couldn't prove that it was done on purpose, and Jack would only be charged if they could. He and Jack had to fight this until the end, and he just hoped that Jack was prepared to do this; they had a long road ahead of them.

* * *

Ennis was sitting at the table when Jack emerged from the bathroom, looking a lot better now. He was in his dressing gown and his black hair was all over the place; a look that Ennis usually couldn't resist since he was still wet. But Ennis knew that being pounced on was the last thing Jack needed right now; they had a lot to talk about.

"Feel better?" he asked as Jack sat down opposite him. Jack grabbed a sandwich and nodded.

"Yeah. Now I've got that place off me. Listen, I...I'm really glad you did all that tonight. You called Peter right away and then followed...you paid the bail and didn't move until they let me go...I just wanna say thank you for that." He managed to smile at Ennis.

"Jack...I'm your husband. I was doing what I was supposed to do because I love you. I didn't like what was going on and I just wanted you out of there."

Jack nodded, trying to eat but it wasn't easy with the knots in his stomach. "Well...what are we gonna do now?"

"As soon as we can, we'll go and see Peter and get our argument started. I, um...I've realised what happened to my medical records. Remember when my dad went outside, claiming he needed to smoke?"

"God...you think he stole them?" Jack asked, the pieces all falling into place. "So that's proof that I infected you."

"Right, but there's still no proof that it was done on purpose," Ennis replied. "And there's our argument right there."

Jack still didn't look any more hopeful than before, so Ennis tried something else. "I called your mom; I told her what happened and she asked me to tell you that she loves you. You should probably call her sometime."

"Right..." Jack couldn't swallow with the lump in his throat, so had given up trying to eat anything.

"Jack...are you okay?" Ennis knew it was a stupid question but he didn't know what else to ask. Jack looked up at him.

"Am I okay?" he repeated, sounding incredulous. "Are you seriously asking me that?" He leaned back. "I'm being accused of trying to kill the man I love, and now you're asking me if I'm okay?"

"Jack-" But Ennis was cut off by Jack standing up.

"I know your parents were never gonna accept me being with you, but neither of us thought they'd do this. And you know why? Because they think I ought to be punished for doing this to their precious boy," he seethed, looking angry. Ennis knew that Jack wasn't angry with him, so he said nothing. "They're trying to break us up."

"Jack...even if you're locked up, I won't want a divorce. You probably won't get a life sentence, maybe just a few years. I'll be there at the end of it."

"You won't put your life on hold for a few years," Jack replied, his anger deflating. Now he just looked miserable. "You'll need someone to love, and you won't wanna wait. So this really will break us up if I get locked up."

Ennis hated the prospect of a life without Jack, and he was more determined than ever to make sure it didn't happen. "You don't know that..."

"Yeah, I do. And I'll tell you something else...you know what'll happen to me in there."

"Alright, look-"

"Come on, Ennis. We have to be honest here. We've both heard the stories and rumours; everybody has. You know what'll happen."

Ennis stood up. "Will you calm down?"

"No!" Jack yelled back, stepping away. He was truly terrified of that happening to him again. "You know what they'll do to me in there, Ennis! The same fucking thing that Daniel Waters did to me in the park all those years ago! And this time...I'll never recover. I know that much."

"Jack, stop it. There's a chance we can fight this and keep you out of there. Stop panicking before anything's happened!"

"I can't help it!" Jack's voice broke as he said this, looking scared and upset. "It's all I can think about. The pain, the blood...the feeling like I'm some kind of prey...if I hadn't met you, I...I might have thought about ending everything."

Ennis looked shocked. "Jack...you've never told me that, in all the years I've known you. Are you serious?"

Jack nodded. "I was heading that way before I came to California. Didn't have any friends apart from Lureen, I couldn't come back here, my dates never worked out...I had nothing, Ennis. If it hadn't been for you, I probably would've done it."

"Bud...you should have told me before," Ennis said softly. "You feel like you'll do it if you go to prison and it happens again?"

"Maybe," Jack murmured. "The only thing keeping me going right now is knowing that you love me and that you're trying to help me. If it happens, and we break up..." He put his hands over his mouth, choking out a sob.

Ennis was soon close to him, wrapping him up in his arms and murmuring to him. "It's okay..." he soothed, rubbing Jack's back. "Calm down...look, there's no guarantee that they'll win. It's more likely that we will, and then it'll be over."

"But what if I do get sent down?" Jack asked, still trembling in his arms. Ennis held him closer.

"Then we'll deal with it. I'll still love you, and I'll do whatever it takes to get you out of there as soon as possible." He pulled away to look into Jack's face. "You're not gonna lose me, Jack. Ever, you hear?" Jack gulped and Ennis held his face in his hands. "We're gonna fight this, together."

Jack nodded, finally believing that there was a chance for them. He couldn't fall apart and give up, not when he had so much to live for. He had this wonderful man by his side and not even a prison sentence could tear them apart.


	13. Chapter 13

**Chapter 13**

_September 30th, 2012_

By Sunday, things had calmed down a little. Jack was trying not to panic so much despite how worried he was about going to prison. Ennis had been trying to reassure him that they could fight this and he was pinning all of his hopes on that. They were due to meet with Peter the next day to talk about their defence and what it might mean for their adoption application. Jack knew that if they were unable to adopt because of this, Ennis would never forgive his parents.

He still couldn't believe how low they had sunk just to get back at him; did they really hate him so much? The infection had been an accident and they probably knew that, but were clearly taking advantage of the fact that intentional transmission warranted the charges he was facing. They were determined to see him punished.

"I still can't believe all this," he said as they sat outside on the balcony, enjoying the warm weather. "To think that they would do this just because they don't approve..."

"I know," Ennis replied, squeezing his hand. He and Jack had managed to have sex last night, albeit slow and emotional because of how vulnerable Jack had been feeling. It would be a while before they really went at it, but that was okay; he just wanted things to get back to normal. "I can't believe my dad stole the records...you think they planned it right from the moment I told them?"

Jack shook his head. "I don't see how. They didn't know until you told them and they were never alone while we were there. Maybe...I dunno...your dad figured there might be something in the car? Just to see if there was anything they could use against me?"

"Yeah, maybe...I'm thinking of trying to call them again," Ennis admitted.

"They didn't reply to your message?"

"Nope. Guess they didn't like what I had to say. But they can't do this; you've done nothing wrong and you don't deserve to be punished. They know damn well it was an accident..."

"You know...didn't Peter say that even if it had been on purpose, then you would've consented to it?" Jack asked, looking thoughtful. "So then that would prove I didn't force you, because of our relationship."

"Right. You know, over the last couple of years I did have the occasional moment where I thought of asking you to infect me. Just because I thought it would make things easier. At least then we wouldn't have had to be so careful."

"I'm glad you didn't ask me," Jack told him. "It was hard enough when I infected you by accident. If you'd asked me, it would've been worse. You're not a bug-chaser, Ennis..."

"A what?"

"That's what they call them. People who actively seek out positive people just to have unprotected sex with them and get infected. They want to get it because they think it's gonna happen anyway, so they don't see the point in being safe."

Ennis had never heard of this before. "God...there are really people like that?"

"Yep. There's this one guy who comes to my talks at the centre; he used to be one, then he caught it and realised his mistake. They don't seem to really know about the effect it has on a life once it's there. And it's not like there's a cure for it yet. They call it 'conversion', I think...when they get infected by someone. It's crazy...to put yourself at risk like that."

"Sure is. It's like I used to say...if you're gonna get infected, it should at least be by someone you love, who'll stay with you afterwards. That's part of why I wasn't so afraid to get it...I knew I'd have you." He smiled over at Jack, whose cheeks had reddened slightly. "Anyway...you gonna call your mom sometime? She was worried about you."

Jack sighed. "I know...but it's hard. Even though it's a false accusation, it's not exactly something to be proud of."

"Jack, you know she loves you. She knows this is all a lie from my parents and that we're gonna fight it. She wants to hear from you that you're coping."

"I know...I'll call her this week, I promise." Ennis nodded and sighed, looking out over the city. They could see Manhattan from here.

"I was thinking...those medical records are confidential, right? Nobody but John can look at them without my consent."

"Yeah..."

"Well, since my dad stole them...maybe we could turn this around on them," Ennis suggested, looking thoughtful. "Surely it's a crime to steal something like that?"

"I think so, but...how do we prove they were stolen? Your parents could say that you gave them a copy or something."

"Right," Ennis replied, seeing the truth in this. They had nothing to go on. "Well, maybe we'll think of something. We don't even have a court date yet, so I think we've got time to figure this out." He stood up to get another drink, but then found himself being pulled into Jack's lap. "What's this, then?" he asked with a smirk. Jack nuzzled his nose.

"Just...really glad I don't have to face this alone," he said softly, squeezing Ennis's fingers. He leaned in and they kissed deeply, sighing in unison at the familiar warmth. Up here, in their own little world, they were safe. They were out of the way and nobody could get to them here; it was just the two of them together.

"I love you, bud," Ennis murmured to him when they broke apart, kissing his jaw. Jack smiled at him.

"Right back at you. We...we can do this, Ennis. We've got to, because...I just can't go to prison. Not when I think about what could happen..." His voice broke at the end and Ennis pulled him close.

"Shh...try not to worry, bud. We'll do everything we can to make sure it doesn't happen, I promise." Jack nodded and hugged him back, trying to believe his words.

* * *

A little later, Ennis decided to go ahead and try to talk to his parents. More than anything, he just wanted them to leave him and Jack alone to get on with their lives; he'd been happy to leave it all behind him until now.

He sat on the sofa with Jack at the opposite end, facing him. Their legs were gently pressed together in the middle, giving Ennis some kind of courage.

"Are you sure about this now?" Jack asked him, looking apprehensive. "Would this go into court records?"

Ennis shrugged. "Peter said it would be okay. Besides, if I can get them to stop, then we won't have any more of this. It's stressful."

"I agree...but we don't want them using this against us. We need everything we can get if we're gonna win."

"I've got to try," Ennis replied, holding his phone up. Jack nodded and he dialled his parents' home number.

"Hello?" came his mother's voice.

"Mom, it's me," Ennis replied, determined to hold his ground.

"Oh...right. We got your message the other night."

"Yeah, I did that just after Jack was led away by the police," Ennis shot at her. "Then I went down to the station. Do you have any idea what you've done?"

"I could ask that partner of yours the same thing," she said. Ennis seethed at how she wouldn't even say Jack's name. "He's ruined your life."

"No, he hasn't," Ennis replied. "He hasn't ruined anything; it was an accident and you know that."

"Ennis...he's made you think that. He manipulated you into thinking that because he wants to keep you with him."

He couldn't believe what he was hearing. "Mom...Jack didn't need to infect me to make me stay with him. I'm with him because I want to be; he hasn't manipulated me."

Jack looked saddened at this; he hadn't felt so hated in his life, not even when his father had disowned him. How could she even say something like that? Ennis was capable of making his own choices.

"Ennis...we can't stop this. We're doing this for you, son. When he gets put away, you'll thank us."

"I doubt that; he's not gonna go down anyway, because there's no proof that he forced me. He would never do that." Then he thought about the records. "By the way, I've figured it out; my dad stole the records, right? From the car?"

"Well...your dad really does smoke electronic cigarettes. He said that when he went outside, he saw your rental car and...wondered if there was anything in there that we could use. I don't approve of stealing, but when he showed them to me...I realised we had to do something. It isn't right for him to be with you when he's done this."

"You stole confidential records," Ennis informed her. "And if I can use this against you and prove it, then I will." Jack half-smiled at him; he was impressed by how Ennis was taking charge of the situation. When Jack had first laid eyes on him in the coffee shop, his initial impression had been that Ennis was a very dependable man who he could rely on. Ennis had proved this more than once through their relationship.

"Ennis, I don't want to argue about this. We've made our decision and we think it's the best thing for you. You will thank us when he's away in prison."

"Mom...I told you how Jack got infected in the first place. How it nearly destroyed him and how he still has nightmares. Surely you've heard about what happens in prisons to gay guys?"

"We know, but...it's all he deserves for hurting you the way he has," she replied. He would have thought she was joking if she hadn't sounded so sure of herself. He couldn't believe what he was hearing.

"How the hell can you say that? He's a good man who was in the wrong place at the wrong time and he's been suffering for it ever since. He's done nothing wrong."

"Ennis, your dad's just got back from work. I'd better go..."

"Please, Mom...stop this now," he pleaded. "This'll end badly for all of us, even if he isn't charged. "I'll cut you off completely either way and I'll never forgive you."

"At least you'll be safe without him. We're not stopping, Ennis...we're doing this for you." She hung up at this, leaving him to stare at his phone.

"God...never thought she could be such a bitch," he mused. He looked up and saw that Jack had drawn his knees up to his chest, looking miserable. "Hey..." Ennis crawled forward and lifted his chin. "Don't let it get to you, bud..."

"She thinks I deserve to be attacked again, doesn't she?" Jack asked. He blinked back tears. "What if...I go to prison and Daniel Waters is there? You know what he'll do to me, Ennis...and I'm scared..." He gulped. "As soon as he catches me alone..."

Ennis pulled Jack's legs down to lie flat and he moved closer, pulling Jack into his arms. "Shush now...that's not gonna happen, darlin'. You're not gonna get sent down because we're gonna fight this. I don't care what she says...they've got nothing." He pressed a soft kiss to Jack's neck, trying to comfort him. Jack closed his eyes and allowed Ennis to give him some attention, enjoying the kisses he was being given.

When their lips met, Jack trembled slightly with emotion. "Sorry, I just...sometimes I can't believe I managed to meet someone like you. You're strong, and dependable...you're my rock, you know?"

Ennis nuzzled him. "I like being there for you, Jack. Don't really know why...maybe I just like taking care of people I love. I'll do whatever it takes to keep you here with me, Jack...even if it means cutting them out of my life for good. It'll be their own fault for trying to break us up."

He pulled Jack close again, rubbing his back and hoping that no other nasty surprises were heading their way.

* * *

_September 31st, 2012_

On Monday, Ennis and Jack were due for a meeting with their lawyer. They just had to know what was going to happen and if it could in any way affect their adoption application. Jack was feeling especially nervous; he knew that Ennis really wanted to raise a child and he would never forgive himself if this meant that they couldn't.

"Look, try not to worry," Ennis told him as they waited to be seen. "I'm sure he said that if you're not charged then it won't change anything."

"I know, but...I can't help it. I know you wanna have a kid, Ennis...and I do too but if we can't because of this..." He looked away. "Maybe you'll feel resentful towards me..."

Ennis sighed and put an arm around him; Jack wasn't normally like this but he could understand it. "Jack...that's not gonna happen. I'll still love you no matter what happens. Even if you are sent to prison, I'll do everything I can to get you out of there as soon as possible, okay?"

Jack smiled at him and rested his head against Ennis's, taking a deep breath to try and calm himself. He knew that Ennis was right; that they couldn't just assume the worst was going to happen at this early stage. There was the chance that everything would be alright and he had to hold onto that. He knew how lucky he was to have Ennis on his side, even though it meant Ennis fighting his parents like this.

When Peter called them in, they sat on the other side of the desk with their hands clasped between them. "Alright, the three of us need to talk about all this," he started when they were settled.

"Yep...we've got a few questions," Ennis replied, trying to keep Jack calm. "And we're worried about our adoption application."

"I understand. Well, I've been in touch with your parents' lawyer and they seem quite determined to see this through until the end," Peter informed him, looking through his notes. "I'm afraid there's not much chance of them changing their minds."

"I called them yesterday," Ennis told him, the conversation still whirring in his mind. He hadn't believed his parents could be capable of something like this. "They seem convinced that Jack did it on purpose to make me stay with him, and that he's brainwashed me or something." He shook his head. "I never thought they'd do this."

"It's like I told you the other night...I think they have a very weak argument that shows signs of desperation. They want to see Jack punished for infecting you, so they're going for anything they can."

"Ennis's dad stole his medical records," Jack cut in, feeling indignant over it. "His mom admitted it."

"But we can't prove it," Ennis added. "They could just say we gave them a copy and then they turned around to betray us. I don't think we could prove that they stole it."

"Alright...but if there is a way then we'll do it. I'm sure we'll figure something out. You said you were worried about your adoption application?"

"Yeah. Even if he isn't charged it'll still go on our record, right? So that won't look good..."

"I can tell you that if Jack is not found guilty, it will go on your record as a false accusation and it won't affect your application. If need be, you can simply explain why he was accused in the first place. I personally think that as long as you can show your unity, and that you're working together to get through this...it will look good for you. It'll prove that you can work as a team, which is very important for bringing up children."

"Okay. Did you say something before about turning this around on my parents?" Ennis asked; he wouldn't be above doing this if it saved Jack from what could happen to him.

"Yes, I did. The fact that you and Jack have been in a relationship for a substantial amount of time, and that your parents didn't attend your wedding because they don't approve...well, if you can prove to the jury that this is being done out of spite, it could very well make them question the validity of the accusation. This could determine the outcome for you, which is exactly what we need. You should try everything you can to make this work in your favour, guys. It's probably the only way you can win."

Ennis nodded and squeezed Jack's hand, managing to draw a smile from him. He could read Jack very well by now, and he knew that while Jack was terrified of going to prison, he was determined to stay out of there. Perhaps it was Jack's fear that was driving him to try and defend himself, and Ennis was glad that he wasn't giving up.

"Alright...so we need to work on our defence," he said finally. Peter nodded.

"Yep. I would say that you two should write down everything you can think of that would help; the circumstances surrounding you and your parents. And keep going with your adoption application; there's no reason to give up on that yet."

They thanked him and left the office, and when they got outside Jack sighed.

"He's right...we can't give up. You keep telling me that and I'm acting as though I've already been charged," he said, looking up into the sky. Ennis nudged him.

"You had a good reason to. You're scared and I understand why. But I can see that the fear is making you realise that you need to fight this." Jack nodded.

"Yeah, I guess. You sure you're okay with us fighting your parents like this?" he asked.

Ennis took his hand again. "I am, because it means I can help to keep you safe," he replied. "That's more important to me now." He kissed Jack's cheek and they set off walking, feeling as if they could do this as long as they stuck together.

* * *

After dinner, Ennis and Jack were sitting on the sofa together trying to relax. They had opened a bottle of wine, which usually helped when they were stressed, and were now sitting together comfortably on the sofa with the TV on in the background. At the moment, they liked it best when it was just the two of them.

When they had had their last HIV scare a couple of years ago and Ennis's parents had practically thrown them out a second time, Ennis had decided there and then that he wanted nothing more to do with them. But some part of him had never stopped hoping that they would come around, which was why he had invited them to the wedding. He had always wanted his parents to be part of his life and to accept Jack.

Since they had ignored the invitation, he had started to resign himself to the fact that they might never accept this. He was now starting to wish that they had never gone back there, and that he had never told them about his HIV status; if they hadn't then they wouldn't be dealing with this right now.

"Are you okay?" Jack asked him, looking up into his face. He could tell when Ennis was thinking about something that upset him; he knew how Ennis thought and when he was thinking. Ennis shook his head.

"Not really. Wishing that we'd never told them now...look what it's done."

"It's my fault," Jack murmured, and Ennis looked at him. "I pushed you to try and reach out to them, to talk to them about being positive. If I hadn't, then..."

Ennis put a hand over his mouth. "Jack, it's not your fault. I was thinking about trying to reach out to them before you even suggested it. You were right...I always did want my parents in my life and until now, I didn't want to stop trying. No matter what you said, I wouldn't have done it if I hadn't wanted to. You didn't make me do anything."

Jack nodded. "Alright...but what happens after all this? If I am sent to prison, then what?" As much as he hated to admit it, he knew that they had to try and prepare themselves for the worst.

"I'll never speak to them again," Ennis replied, knowing that he would hold his ground on that one. "I'll fight to get you out. And if you're not charged and walk free, I still won't talk to them because of what they tried to do. They've started this, and they can suffer for it when it's all over. They might think they're doing the best thing for me, but...I can't see it."

"Say for a moment that we raise a baby," Jack started, shuffling to face him. "And when he or she grows up, they end up with someone who's positive and they get infected. By accident, just like with us. What would you do?"

"If they were with a good person who regrets infecting them and loves them as much as we love each other, we'd work it out. I sure as hell wouldn't try sending them off to prison," Ennis told him. "I don't get why my parents can't see this any other way."

Jack sighed and moved closer to him; he needed the warmth that Ennis was radiating right now. It gave him a lot of comfort to know that he had someone who could take care of him; that was one perk of being with a man that he didn't think he could ever get with a woman. "Me neither...I thought they were just trying to protect you, but...from what you told me, they seem determined to break us up even though they must know it'll hurt you."

Ennis finished his glass of wine and slid his arm around Jack's stomach. "Well...there's nothing we can do about that now. We've just got to stick together and fight this as long as we can, bud. I'll do everything I can to help but you've got to stand up for yourself too. We can't let them win, Jack...I can't lose you..."

Both were silent for a few moments until Jack finished his own glass. "Ennis..." He turned so that he was facing Ennis properly, eyes gazing up into his. "I love you so much...and I'll fight to stay with you. I sure as hell don't wanna go to prison..."

"You won't," Ennis tried to assure him despite his own worries. "Come here..." He lifted Jack's chin until their lips met, pressing gently to try and draw comfort from each other. He held Jack close as they kissed, hoping that everything was going to be okay. He just couldn't lose Jack, not after he'd built his entire life around him. He would be losing so much more than a husband; a best friend, a soul mate. Jack was the only one who really knew him better than anybody else, and he resented his parents for trying to destroy his marriage. Why couldn't they just leave them alone?

When they pulled apart, Jack's eyes were hazy with lust. It had been a while since Ennis had seen that; the sex lately hadn't been as passionate as usual and he'd missed it. He understood why things were like this, but still; they were used to passionate sex that left them reeling. "Jack..."

"Ennis..." he breathed, lowering his head to nibble on Ennis's ear. "I think we need to...get our frustrations out, if you know what I mean." Ennis smirked; the hardness pressing into his leg was a certain indication of what Jack meant.

"Well...maybe. You sure about this?"

"Uh huh...I want you..." He kissed Ennis's jaw, feeling himself growing hard. "I think we need to..."

Ennis managed to gather Jack into his arms and stand up, keeping their lips glued together as he carried Jack through the apartment to the bedroom. Jack was right; they needed to do this and remind themselves of what they were fighting for.

* * *

Ennis kicked the door open with Jack still in his arms, eager to get him onto the bed. Jack kept kissing him as he was laid down, sighing when Ennis pressed his weight down onto him. The duvet had been pulled down about halfway, ready for when they were done and in need of sleep.

"Oh God," he breathed as Ennis started undressing him, kissing his skin as it was exposed. "Ennis..."

He felt nimble fingers undoing his jeans and helped to kick them off, grinning when he saw the look of lust on Ennis's face. "See anything you like?" he asked, and Ennis nodded.

"Sure do." He stripped off his own clothes with Jack watching him, wishing that he could do it quicker. When they were both naked, he leaned down to capture Jack's lips again, making him moan. "Wanna fuck you," he murmured against Jack's lips. "Can I...?"

"Hell yeah," Jack replied, shuffling up the bed until his head was resting on the pillow. Ennis followed him like a moth to a flame, staring at Jack's muscles as they moved.

"God...you're beautiful," he whispered, cupping Jack's cheeks. "You really are..."

Jack smiled up at him. "Come on...make love to me," he whispered back, his entire body yearning for Ennis to complete him. Ennis didn't need much more persuasion; he grabbed the lube from the bedside table and smeared it over himself, seeing how Jack was watching him hungrily. "Hurry up..."

"Steady on, bud," Ennis said to him, nuzzling his neck. He spread Jack's legs wider and got into position, gazing down lovingly at him. "You sure you're ready?"

Jack nodded, eyes pleading. "Yeah...I need you, Ennis...need you to do this."

"Alright, darlin'...just relax..." He started to push himself in, the familiar warmth washing over him as he entered Jack's body. There was nothing that felt like this and he considered himself very lucky that Jack trusted him so much. Considering what Jack had been through by the time they had met, Ennis could see how easy it might have been for Jack to not trust him enough. But he had and Ennis knew that he would always take care of Jack.

When Ennis was fully inside him, Jack let his head fall back to the pillow and he sighed, shifting slightly until he was comfortable. "Why does this feel so good every damn time?" he murmured, wrapping his legs around Ennis's waist. Ennis had his hands braced on either side of Jack's head, ready to move.

"Because it's right," he said simply, and he kissed Jack once more before starting to thrust, nuzzling his neck the way Jack liked.

"Sure is..." Jack had his arms around Ennis's neck by now, holding on tightly as he felt Ennis move inside him. "Oh..."

"Don't worry about anything," Ennis whispered in his ear after a few moments. "I'll take care of you, Jack...nothing bad will happen to you as long as I'm around, okay? I swear, Jack..."

"I know," Jack replied, trembling with emotion and arousal. "Ennis...I...I love you so much..."

"I love you too..." Ennis planted his lips on Jack's, rocking steadily into him and keeping it slow. He knew how scared Jack was of going to prison and he wished that he could reassure him that it wasn't going to happen. But Ennis knew that his parents weren't going to let this go and he had to wonder if they could fight this.

"Ennis..." Jack choked out before finally climaxing, shooting in between them and groaning. Ennis soon followed suit and sank down onto him. "Oh God..."

They took several deep breaths before Ennis could pull out, and they lay there enjoying the afterglow. "Darlin'...you okay?" Ennis asked, peering up at Jack's face. His partner nodded.

"Feel better after that. Been a while since it was like this..."

"Yeah, but we had good reason. You were scared, and I didn't wanna pounce on you while you were like that...figured you didn't need it."

"You were right," Jack replied softly. "Ennis...I love it when you do that, but lately, I...I've needed something else. Comfort, I guess. I just needed you to be there for me to try and make me feel better. And you've done that...I do feel better than I was."

"I know you're still scared," Ennis said to him, stroking his neck. "But I'm trying to take your mind off what could happen. There's no guarantee it will, you know?"

Jack sighed. "I know...just can't help it. Especially since I realised that that bastard's gonna be in there too. I still remember the day we saw him in the station after he was arrested..."

Ennis crawled up onto the other side of the bed, wrapping an arm around Jack's stomach. "Darlin'...don't think about it. You know it won't do any good, right? Don't think about him."

Jack turned onto his side, shuffling closer to Ennis's warmth. "I know..." He sighed contentedly. "I'm glad to have you here, bud. Don't care if it makes me weak...I need you to take care of me..."

"It doesn't make you weak," Ennis assured him. "Everyone needs someone to be there for them. You've been there for me too. Like when we got back after my parents disowned me...I was miserable and you were there to take care of me. Now it's my turn. That's what you and me is all about, Jack. We take it in turns to look after each other, because we need each other."

Jack smiled at him. "You're always saying you're no good with words...but you couldn't be more wrong. You know how to say some really sweet things, Ennis. And I love you for it."

He leaned in close for a soft kiss, enjoying how Ennis's lips seemed to mould against his own perfectly. When they broke apart, he tucked his head underneath Ennis's chin and curled up. Ennis smiled at him and pulled the duvet over them both, holding Jack close and praying to whoever might be listening that everything was going to be okay.


	14. Chapter 14

**Chapter 14**

_October 5th, 2012_

Jack woke up early on Friday morning and saw that Ennis was still asleep. He didn't want to disturb his partner so he just lay there, staring at the ceiling. He could tell that it was still early.

There were so many thoughts whirring around his head, enough to give him a headache. But he just couldn't help it. He was honestly scared of what might happen to him and if it might wreck his marriage as a result. Ennis's parents seemed determined to break them up and he didn't know why they couldn't let this go. Surely parents were supposed to accept the decisions their children made when they grew up, including who they chose to spend their life with? Even his father had eventually accepted him for who he was before he died.

His birthday was in just one week, but he didn't feel much like celebrating right now. He would be thirty, which he knew was a big deal. Ennis's birthday had been just before his arrest and they had managed to have fun together despite Ennis's parents disowning him. But now they had the threat of the trial looming over them. He just didn't see how he could enjoy it now, with the possibility of imprisonment facing him.

He knew that he couldn't start panicking over what could happen; it was still early and they had a good defence as far as Peter told them. They could prove that the infection wasn't intentional and that was the only way for Jack to stay out of prison. Their relationship was the best defence they had and he knew that he had Ennis's support through this.

Jack had called his mother a couple of days ago to reassure her that he was coping; he knew that she was worrying about him and that he couldn't really stop her. He had promised her that they would meet for lunch soon to talk about all of this. He understood that she wanted to help him defend himself, but he hoped it wouldn't make things too hard for her; he especially didn't want her to contact Ennis's parents and make things worse.

He sighed and stretched; Ennis was still asleep and he needed to stretch his legs. A glance at the clock told him that they had about an hour before needing to get up for work; plenty of time to go and sit out on the balcony as far as he saw.

He slid out of bed and silently walked over to the balcony, sliding the door back and stepping out. There was a slight breeze but the sky was brightening; he had always loved the morning light when everything was quiet; it gave him time to think before their busy day started.

Jack went over and leaned on the wall, looking out and over to Manhattan across the water. He did love living here, which surprised him considering what he had been through. But maybe it was because they lived far from the park, or maybe because they had gotten married in there. He didn't really know what it was, but he did enjoy this life.

He hoped that he wouldn't have to give this up; the charges wouldn't warrant a life sentence but a few years would be more than enough to change everything. If he was attacked in there he would never recover; that scared him more than anything. What if he lost Ennis as a result? He wouldn't want Ennis to wait for him for years; that wouldn't be fair no matter how much it hurt to let him go.

Ennis woke up to find himself alone in the bed, and he wondered where Jack was. He felt a slight breeze and looked towards the balcony doors; they were slightly open and he could see Jack standing out there. He was dressed in just his boxers, which Ennis liked the look of. Sensing that Jack was doing some thinking, Ennis decided to go and talk to him.

Jack jumped slightly when he felt a pair of arms surround him, and a familiar warmth at his back. "Good morning..."

"Morning, Jack," Ennis murmured to him, kissing his cheek. "What're you doing out here?"

"Just woke up and needed to stretch my legs. Didn't want to disturb you..."

"It's okay. How're you holding up?" Ennis asked, yawning behind him.

Jack shrugged. "Best as can be, I guess. I'm trying not to worry, Ennis...but it's getting to me. I'm terrified of being sent to prison..."

Ennis sighed; he didn't know what he could say that would make Jack feel better. Maybe there was nothing he _could_ say that would change things; they would just have to fight this and try to win. It was all they could do and he would do whatever it took to keep Jack with him. He just couldn't lose him.

"Darlin'...I know you don't like waking me up, but I think you should when something's worrying you. We ought to share these things." He wanted Jack to tell him things when he was worried; as Jack's partner he felt a need to be there for him. He just wanted to see Jack happy.

Jack sighed when Ennis squeezed him, knowing that he was right. "I just...don't like disturbing you when you're trying to sleep. One of us ought to get some shut-eye."

Ennis kissed the back of his neck and rested his chin on Jack's shoulder. "I know what you mean, but I really don't mind. I just wanna help you, bud."

"Let's go sit down..." Jack replied, and they moved to one of the wicker chairs. It was large enough for them to sit in together comfortably, and Jack settled himself on Ennis's lap. "That's better," he concluded, face just inches away from his partner's.

Ennis smiled. "Sure is." He leaned in to press their lips together, holding Jack comfortably in his arms. It was a good way to start the morning.

* * *

After breakfast, Ennis and Jack were heading up to Manhattan to go to work. They always took the subway there and back, and they liked having some more time together before their day started.

Ennis noticed that Jack was preoccupied and he knew why; ever since his arrest he had been debating with himself whether or not to tell his audience at work or the people who came for counselling. As far as Ennis was concerned, it was Jack's choice whether or not he did this; he would be supportive either way.

He had enjoyed their morning make out on the balcony and hoped that Jack was feeling more like himself now. If he was honest, he missed the way Jack used to be. He was the same man of course, but he seemed down these days and Ennis knew why; they were only just recovering from the infection when they had gone over to Mill Valley, and now Jack was facing serious charges if he couldn't prove his innocence. It was no wonder that he felt like this.

"Are you okay?" Ennis asked him, giving him a slight nudge. Jack shrugged.

"I don't know...just thinking about the people I speak to at work."

"You still not decided if you wanna tell them yet?" Ennis asked, and he shook his head. "What's holding you back?"

"Well...I don't really know if I can. It's hard enough to deal with this as it is...I don't really need people telling me it's going to be okay. Don't get me wrong," he added quickly when he caught the look on Ennis's face. "I appreciate it when you say that. You really do make me feel better. But coming from them...it's just too hard. I'm supposed to be counselling them."

"Fair enough. But, Jack...maybe they need to know these things. You've always been praised for how honest you are and...maybe one day they might find themselves in the same situation. They need to know how to handle it."

Jack nodded; he knew that Ennis was making a lot of sense. Some part of him did want to tell them for those very reasons, but he just wasn't sure.

When they reached the city, they kissed goodbye and headed their separate ways until lunch; they always looked forward to that. Jack walked down the street towards the clinic while thinking to himself about what he was going to say. Ennis was right; he couldn't keep hiding it away and the others could very well go through the same thing one day.

He walked into the clinic and saw that a few people had arrived already. He tended to give his talks in the morning and counsel people alone in the afternoon; he enjoyed his job immensely and he hoped that he wouldn't have to give it up. He didn't want his life to change so drastically.

"Hey, guys," he said to them when he approached them. "You're early."

His friend Sam was there, and Jack did consider talking to him about what was going on; he of all people would understand, given that he had been infected in the same way. "Well, we like hearing what you have to say," he replied, smiling. He had been dating someone for a few weeks now and Jack was glad to see him happy, like he was with Ennis.

"Well...there is something I wanna talk to you guys about...something which I think you all ought to know. We'll wait a while for the others before I get started, though."

He started to set up in the room while they sat down, but Sam approached him. "Jack...everything okay? You look distracted..."

He shrugged. "It's...something really bad. I wasn't sure whether or not to tell you guys, but I was talking with Ennis and he's made me see that maybe I should tell you. Won't be easy, though..."

Sam nodded. "Alright. Best of luck, bud." He went to sit down and Jack was left to think over what he was going to say. He hoped that he would be able to get it out.

When other people had arrived, Jack started talking to them. He was sure that he could do this and some part of him wanted to.

"The thing is...you know about me infecting my husband by accident. We went to visit his parents a little while ago, and we told them. His parents basically disowned him and made us leave. But then...the other week, I was arrested. It seems as if his parents are trying to get me sent to prison for attempted murder."

There were a few shocked gasps in the room, accompanied by looks of disgust. "Why would they do that?" asked Sam.

Jack sighed. "Because ever since they found out about me being positive, they haven't been able to accept our relationship. They seemed determined to break us up." He cleared his throat. "You know how I got infected in the first place," he added, glancing at Sam. "Well...it doesn't take a genius to figure out what could happen to me if I'm sent down."

There were a few mutterings of assent in the room. "So what are you gonna do?" asked Claire, the teenager who had been infected by her boyfriend. Everybody here was just an ordinary person who didn't deserve to have this virus.

"Well, fortunately Ennis is on my side. He's decided that he's going to help me fight this as long as we have to. We've got a good lawyer and he says that Ennis's parents have got a very weak argument, considering our relationship and everything. So that's what we're working on right now, and we're hoping it won't affect our adoption application."

He received words of assurance and support from the group; he had been dreading this but it wasn't as bad as he'd thought it would be. He liked knowing that they were fully supportive of him; he couldn't do this alone. He was certain that he would never be.

* * *

_October 8th, 2012_

On Sunday morning, Ennis and Jack were due for a meeting with their lawyer; he had called them the previous evening to tell them that he had some news. They couldn't really tell if it was good or not, but they wanted to know all the same. They needed to know what they were up against if they were going to fight it.

Jack had been initially concerned about Ennis fighting against his parents just for him, wondering if he was really worth it. But Ennis had assured him that he was okay with it; he had made his choice and that was that. Ennis truly didn't care about cutting off his parents if it meant he could be happy with Jack; this was his future now.

"Try not to worry," Ennis told Jack as they walked along the street to Peter's office. "I'm sure it's nothing really bad."

"I can't help it," Jack replied, holding on tightly to his hand. "Keep thinking the worst every time we hear something." He knew in his heart that this was nothing too bad, but still.

"Just calm down," Ennis soothed him as they entered the building. There was nobody here but the receptionist, so they informed her that they were waiting and then sat down together. "I'm sure it's fine."

"Yeah..." Jack kept thinking about his talk the other day. He was truly grateful that everybody was on his side; he had more friends than he'd thought. And they had come up to him afterwards to once again praise him for his honesty. He'd talked with Sam afterwards about the situation, and he did understand why Jack was so scared of going to prison; they shared this in common.

He was surprised that Ennis hadn't expressed any jealousy at how well he got on with Sam, but when asked, Ennis had simply said that he understood their connection based on what had happened to them. Jack knew that Ennis trusted him and he wasn't even interested in Sam; he saw him as a brother more than anything.

For his part, Ennis was certain that Jack would never cheat on him; he simply wasn't the type. Jack was very happy with him, had told him so on several occasions and he believed it.

After a while, Peter called them in and they sat down in his office, wondering what was going on. He didn't usually call them in without further information, so it had come as a surprise to them both. "So, what's going on?" Ennis asked as they sat down.

Peter sighed, knowing that they wouldn't like this. "Well, we heard from the courthouse yesterday. It seems as if the trial date has been set now. November 14th is when it'll start." Ennis took a deep breath, taking this new information in; they had to remain calm.

"That's just five weeks away..." Jack replied, feeling slightly overwhelmed. His entire life could change in less than two months, and he dreaded the possibility of saying goodbye to the man he loved. Surely it couldn't be over, not when they had so many plans? Ennis squeezed his hand, trying to reassure him even though he knew it didn't really work.

"I know, but we've got plenty of time to work on your defence. I'm certain it will all work out, Jack. Like I told you before, just focus on the facts and try not to panic. You've got a very good chance of winning this despite how impossible it might seem right now."

Jack nodded, trying to calm himself and remain rational. "Okay, so...how does this work, on the day?"

"Basically, you and Ennis would have to give evidence in your defence, along with anybody else who you call to witness. This could be someone who knows you."

Jack nodded. "Alright..." Maybe his mother or Lureen could do this for them; they knew him well after all and would probably defend him if he asked. He had a lot of people who were on his side.

"Also, you should know that until the trial is over, you can't leave the state. Considering the seriousness of the accusations..."

"Fair enough." Jack was very nervous about what was going to happen, despite the strong defence they had and the support from family and friends. He knew that he didn't really have much to worry about but he couldn't help it.

"So is that everything?" Ennis asked, and Peter hesitated. He looked as if something else was on his mind and Ennis thought he knew what it was.

"Well...I wanted to ask you if you've heard anything else from your parents. You said the phone call didn't go too well..." Ennis had told him a few days ago and Jack had walked in right in the middle of the call; he hadn't reacted very well to the reminder. Ennis didn't like making Jack upset and he regretted it.

"Yep. They seem determined to break us up and I hate them for it." He gently squeezed Jack's fingers as he spoke, knowing that his partner was still reeling from the whole thing. He wished that he could make all the pain go away. Jack just didn't deserve this after everything he had already been through in his life. Ennis just wanted it to stop.

"Well, all I can say is try not to let it get to you. The pair of you know the truth and that's all we can hold on to. Your relationship is your best defence."

Ennis nodded and tried to smile at Jack, who couldn't meet his eyes. He sighed inwardly; he didn't know what to do. He would never forgive his parents for doing this, regardless of the outcome.

"Come on, then," he said to Jack, tugging at his hand. They bid goodbye to Peter and left the building, and Ennis squeezed his hand again. "Wanna go for a walk?" he asked, indicating to the park. Jack nodded and they set off.

* * *

They entered the park and set off walking, not aiming for anywhere in particular but just enjoying the weather. Ennis knew that the court date was worrying Jack as it was so close, and he hated to see what this was doing to the man he loved. He hoped that they could find some way of turning this around on his parents; it was all they deserved for doing this.

"Look, I know you're worried. But you've gotta remember that you're innocent," he reminded Jack as they walked past a lake. "That's the main thing."

"I know, but I can't help it," Jack replied, shaking his head. "Your parents are determined to have me put away for a long time, enough for you to move on and find someone else."

"Hey," Ennis said to him, stopping in his tracks and looking directly at Jack. "How many times do I have to tell you? That's never gonna happen, Jack. I'll wait as long as I have to."

"And what about what you need?" Jack replied, raising his eyebrows. "You gonna be celibate for however long I'm in there?"

"I've got my right hand," Ennis told him, trying to draw a smile out of Jack. But no such luck.

"It's not the same and you know it. Ennis...when you're inside me I get this feeling. Like...I'm complete or something. And I know you must feel it too when I'm inside you. So are you really gonna go without that for a number of years?"

"I'll have to," Ennis told him, gripping Jack's arms. "Bud...don't do this. You're trying to tell me that you'd be okay with me finding someone to pass the time with, but I know that you're lying. You wouldn't be okay with it and neither would I. Jack...I love you. And there is no way I would ever cheat on you, not even if you said it was okay because I know it's not. It would hurt you if I did, and I don't wanna hurt you, ever."

Jack gulped and looked down; Ennis knew him all too well. "I just...I'm just trying to do the right thing. Making preparations just in case..."

"Well, don't keep thinking that way. I can go without sex if it means holding onto you; it'll be difficult, but I'll get through it. Look at it this way...when you do get out, it'll all be bottled up and I'll be all over you," he said, smiling at Jack. The corners of Jack's mouth twitched and Ennis knew he'd gotten through. "Darlin'...I appreciate that you're trying to think of me, but I don't need to be told what I can do if you're put away. I'm staying faithful no matter what."

Jack nodded, feeling a little emotional. "Okay. Sorry I keep falling apart like this...don't mean to."

Ennis shrugged. "Reckon you've got a good enough excuse. I know it's scary, what could happen, but you've gotta try and think positive, you know?"

Jack gave a humourless laugh. "I _always_ think positive, Ennis. I'm a positive person, always positive." He turned away, folding his arms. Ennis swallowed down his hurt; he knew that Jack didn't mean to be like this.

"You're not the only one, you know," he said quietly. Jack's shoulders slumped and he turned back to face him.

"I know...I'm sorry." He moved forward and they embraced; they couldn't start fighting now, not when they had to stick together. "Sorry, baby..."

"It's okay...I know why you're like this. You're scared, and just all over the place right now. I understand."

Jack sniffed. "I just...my whole life could change in less than two months and I don't know how to deal with that. It took me so long to adjust to being positive, and I didn't know it was gonna happen. I know I could go to prison but knowing that doesn't make it any easier."

"Shh..." Ennis soothed him, rubbing his back. "I know. Jack...if you go to prison I swear I'll do everything I can to get you out of there. I mean...I'm the person who they're accusing you of trying to kill...surely it says something for me to be on your side?"

"You'd think...but...oh God, Ennis. What if we end up with a homophobic judge? Or jury? That's gonna make it even harder 'cos they think we're all monsters."

Ennis sighed; he wished that Jack could stop worrying. "Jack, calm down. You'll do yourself damage if you keep on like this and I don't wanna see you like that."

Jack held onto him, feeling like he never wanted to let go. "I know...I feel so drained, trying to fight this. Feel like I've been fighting ever since I was infected."

"If I could take all the pain away, I would," Ennis murmured in his ear, squeezing him. "I'd rather feel it all myself than let you bear it."

"Then I'd feel guilty for making you feel it," Jack replied, and he sniffed. "We're a right pair, aren't we?"

"Guess so. Maybe that's why we're such a good match...we were made for each other, I reckon." Ennis pulled away and wiped Jack's eyes with his thumbs, with such a loving look on his face that it made Jack's heart skip a beat.

"Ennis..." he breathed, closing his eyes when Ennis leaned in. The kiss was sweet and reassuring; everything he needed right now. He loved how Ennis would hold him as they kissed, making him feel like he was the most important person in the world. He'd always loved it when Ennis gave him such attention; the touches, the kisses, the looks...it always made him feel good and he hoped that he had the same effect on Ennis.

"Don't worry," Ennis breathed against his lips. "I'll take care of you as much as I can. I'll fight your corner at the trial and make sure that you stay with me. Always gonna be here, Jack."

Jack nodded and leaned in again, his heart finally believing that he would always have Ennis.

* * *

At dinner that evening, Ennis started thinking about Jack's birthday. It would be in just four days and he would be thirty, like Ennis himself. Being a milestone birthday, Ennis wanted them to celebrate it properly but he wondered if Jack would even be up for it. This was another reason why Ennis was starting to hate his parents; they were wrecking everything that he and Jack had worked for over the last three years. Everything that he and Jack normally did was now tainted with the possibility that the next few weeks together could be the last for a long time, and he didn't like that.

He had half a mind to call his parents again to try to plead with them to stop; why couldn't they see that they were destroying him as well as Jack? Seeing Jack this miserable was like a knife in his heart and he just wanted it to stop for good. They had to win this fight.

He'd made Jack's favourite dinner in an effort to cheer him up, and Jack had kissed his cheek in thanks before they'd sat down. Now they were eating and occasionally glancing up at each other. They preferred to sit opposite each other when eating at a table, even at restaurants because it meant they could see each other. But Ennis had enjoyed sitting next to Jack during their first date, because of how Jack had slid over for their first kiss. That was a very fond memory of his that he would always hold on to.

Jack was enjoying the dinner and the company, but couldn't relax even now. His mind was constantly going over the possibility of going to prison and what that would mean for him and Ennis. He'd thought that it would only be fair to let Ennis go if he was put away, but if he was honest he knew he didn't really want that. Ennis had sworn to remain faithful.

"Jack?" Ennis asked, and he looked up, looking distracted. Maybe he was thinking of the same thing.

"Yeah?"

"I was thinking...what d'you wanna do for your birthday? Just four days away now." Jack's eyes lowered slightly.

"Oh, um..." Truth be told, he hadn't given it much thought. The past few weeks had driven all thoughts of celebrating from his mind; one more reason to hate Ennis's parents. Slowly but surely, they were draining him of his personality and everything he enjoyed. "I dunno. Haven't really thought about it..."

"Well...I was gonna suggest we take a trip somewhere, but..." Ennis hesitated, knowing it was a sensitive subject for Jack. He didn't want to upset him like earlier in the park.

"But I'm not allowed to leave the state," Jack finished for him, looking back down again and trying to eat. "Ennis...I don't wanna make a big deal of it. I mean...it could be the last birthday we spend together for a long time."

"Jack-" Ennis started, but Jack held up his hand.

"No, hear me out. I know it's not guaranteed that I'll be found guilty, because we've got a strong defence. But there's always the possibility. So...if it's okay, I just wanna spend my birthday with you. Maybe...we could just have dinner?"

"Okay," Ennis replied, nodding. "But we're doing something romantic and that's that. Maybe we could...have sex in front of the fire?" he suggested. "With the flames going and maybe a big blanket on the floor? I know you like that." He smiled when he saw Jack's eyes light up; they had done that before and it was always very romantic to make love in that way. In the glow from the firelight, they could see each other and enjoy every second of what they were doing. That was always something to look forward to.

"That sounds great," Jack replied, nodding. "I'd like that."

"Sorted, then," Ennis concluded, smiling wider. Maybe they would be alright. "And you know...I reckon we can make it fun. Massage oil...stuff like that."

"Yeah." Jack reached out with his foot and curled it around Ennis's ankle, drawing his leg closer and keeping it there. Ennis smiled and carried on eating, knowing that he'd done the right thing; Jack was a little happier than before. Ennis had only ever wanted to make Jack happy, every minute of every day. Hopefully he could do that for a long time.

When they were finished, they did the dishes together and then settled themselves onto the sofa. Ennis sat in the corner, leaning against the arm and holding Jack close. Jack was enjoying having Ennis's arms around his waist as they watched TV, feeling safe and secure like nothing could hurt him. There was nothing else, and nobody else, that could make him feel like this. He sighed and rested his head against Ennis's shoulder. "This is good..."

"Sure is," Ennis replied, softly kissing the back of Jack's head; his hair was always so silky and soft and he loved it. He was a little aroused by having Jack sat between his legs, in perfect position to get up to something, but there would be time for that later; Jack needed comfort now, needed to be held. "You have any idea how much I love you?" he murmured. Jack smiled, enjoying the firm hold Ennis had on him.

"How could I not? You tell me all the time," he replied, squeezing Ennis's arms. "I'm not complaining, though. I love hearing you tell me...feels good to know that you do. I've never doubted it, but you know what I mean."

Ennis nodded. "I do, bud. And I know you love me," he added, nuzzling Jack's ear. He knew it was true but like Jack, he loved to hear it.

"With all my heart," he whispered, closing his eyes. They continued to embrace for a while before deciding to go to bed, keeping their hands clasped together as they made their way to the bedroom, wanting to show each other exactly how they felt.


	15. Chapter 15

**Chapter 15**

_October 11th, 2012_

Ennis could feel his patience growing thin. Jack's birthday was tomorrow and he didn't seem too enthusiastic about it. They were both looking forward to a night together in front of the fire, but Jack didn't seem happy about it being his birthday. Under different circumstances, Ennis would have thought that it was because he was turning thirty, but he knew that this wasn't the case.

He was doing everything he could think of to put a smile on Jack's face, going out of his way to make him happy. He was enjoying doing all of this for Jack, but it saddened him when he noticed how Jack's smiles didn't reach his eyes. What kind of damage was all of this doing to him? Where was his sweet, loving partner who had stolen his heart in a little coffee shop? He was there somewhere; Ennis could see him behind those dull, sometimes lifeless blue eyes. The only way to get him back was to win this case.

"I just don't know what the hell to do," he was saying to Lureen on the phone during his lunch break; Jack had his routine check at the doctor's, so Ennis was at home making some lunch for himself. "I'd be pissed off at him if he didn't look so beaten. I can't get mad at him for it, not when it's not his fault. I just wanna see him happy, you know?"

"And the only way is for you guys to win the case," she finished for him. "Look, Ennis...when Jack started seeing you, I swear I'd never seen him so happy. Under normal circumstances, you guys are really happy together. I've seen it with my own eyes. You just have to try and get through this as best you can. He knows that you're there for him no matter what, so just keep reminding him of how much you love him. I know that none of this is easy, but you have to try."

"Yeah. I've been thinking of trying to call my parents again, get them to drop the charges. There's a few weeks until the trial and Jack's getting worse. If they drop it now he might avoid a breakdown. You think I should?"

"It's worth a shot," she agreed. "Look, I've gotta go now. But please let me know how things are going, and tell Jack happy birthday for me."

"Will do. Bye, Lureen." He hung up and sat down with his lunch, looking at his phone and contemplating the call he was about to make. He just didn't know what else to do; there was no other way right now and he didn't think that Jack would last the next few weeks. He would of course be there for Jack if he broke down, but he knew that he would rather avoid it happening altogether. Jack was usually a very strong person, but this court case was messing him up inside and Ennis hated that.

He kept glancing at his phone as he ate, thinking over what he was going to say. He'd already tried everything he could think of to try and deter them from what they were going to do, but he had to keep trying. He would do anything to protect Jack.

He eventually picked his phone up and dialled his parents' house, hoping to get through to them this time. He still couldn't believe what they were doing.

"Hello?" asked his mother when she picked it up.

"Mom, it's me," he said to her. "I wanted to talk to you."

"Oh?" she asked. Clearly unconcerned, as far as he could tell.

"We know that the court date's been set for November 14th. We heard from our lawyer a few days ago. Jack's freaking out, saying that he's only got a few more weeks until his life changed completely." He wanted her to know the damage they were doing.

"Well, we can't help that. This is the way things are going."

"Mom, why can't you just accept that I love him and want to be with him? Aren't parents supposed to support their kids and the decisions they make? Being with him is my decision."

"Ennis, we're just thinking of you. We just want the best for you."

"The best thing would be for you to drop it and leave us alone. I want to be with Jack."

His mother sighed. "Ennis...your father and I have been talking. We know that this is difficult for you right now and we are sorry about that. But we do have a suggestion for you, if we're going to drop this. Something for you to think about."

"And what's that?" he asked warily, wondering what on earth she was going to suggest.

"If you want us to drop this, and to leave you and Jack alone...then file for divorce."

Ennis nearly dropped the phone; how on earth could she say that? "What?" he whispered. He wasn't quite sure that he had heard her correctly.

"You heard me. Use the infection as grounds for divorce and leave him. If you do that, then we will drop the charges. It's the only way, Ennis. We don't want you with him."

"So you're giving me an ultimatum. Well, then we're just gonna have to fight this. Because there is no way I'm divorcing him. I swore that I would stand by him and that's what I'm gonna do. We're gonna win this case. And even if Jack is locked up, I'll do everything I can to get him out of there. Forget it, okay? I'm not leaving him, ever." He hung up before she could reply, fuming at what she had said.

He couldn't believe what she had suggested, but even now he couldn't bear to think about it. He wouldn't even consider the thought, let alone do it; the idea of leaving Jack made him feel physically sick, for they needed each other. He would just have to help Jack fight this.

* * *

When Ennis met up with Jack after work, Jack seemed to know that something was wrong. He only had to look at Ennis's face to know that he had something to tell him.

"You gonna tell me what's wrong?" he asked as they took the subway back home. "I know that something is..."

Ennis sighed. "Yeah, there is. I was talking to my mom earlier, during lunch. I asked her again to drop the charges, and she...well, I'll tell you during dinner. Promise."

Jack nodded and rested his head on Ennis's shoulder, wondering what Sarah had said and if it was really bad. There wasn't long left until the trial and he was worrying about it more and more every day. His entire future was hanging on this one trial, and he wasn't sure of the outcome even with Ennis's support.

They got back to the apartment and Ennis turned Jack to face him, kissing his cheek. "Tell you what, I'll make dinner tonight. What d'you want?"

"We got any of those chicken pies left?" Jack asked. "The ones with the vegetables and gravy in them?" Ennis nodded.

"Yeah, I think so. I'll put them in." He went to the kitchen and set about preparing dinner for them both. Even though he would never contemplate what his mother had suggested, he had a feeling that Jack might get upset when he heard about it. He could need calming down, along with some reassurance that Ennis wasn't leaving him. Ennis didn't want to upset Jack tonight.

Ennis was aware of Jack watching him as he set the table, going over in his mind how he was going to say it. He had to make sure that Jack knew he wasn't going anywhere.

All too soon, the food was ready and they were sitting down. Jack managed to get through dinner well enough, talking about other things and putting off the inevitable. He could sense that Ennis was figuring out how to tell him the news without upsetting him. Jack appreciated it but he hated feeling so fragile; Ennis's parents didn't seem to care what they were doing to him.

"Ennis?" he asked when they were finishing. "Can you please tell me what's going on? What did your mom say?"

Ennis sighed; he didn't want to do this but he had no choice; Jack deserved to know. "Alright. This won't be easy, but I know I should tell you. But please...try not to get upset, Jack."

"Just tell me," Jack replied softly, reaching across the table. Ennis covered Jack's hand with his own.

"Well...she said that if I want them to drop the charges...I should file for divorce. That I should use the infection as a reason for leaving you."

Jack felt his heart sink and he drew his hand away. "Oh?" he asked; was Ennis thinking about it?

"Jack," Ennis said to him. "Don't. I know what you're thinking. And I can tell you that I'm not thinking about it, at all. I was disgusted when she said it and there is no way I'm gonna do it."

"You mean that?" Jack asked him, looking up into his eyes. "It's the only way to stop this..."

Ennis got up and walked around the table, pulling Jack to his feet. "Jack, look at me. I don't care what she says. I am _not_ leaving you, ever. Even if it is the only way for them to drop the charges, I don't care. I can't be without you, Jack; I just can't. I love you and don't wanna be without you."

Jack's lip trembled and he looked away. "I know, but...maybe it's the only way. Maybe we could...I dunno...pretend to file for divorce just to get them off our backs? Peter could help us with that."

"They'd find out and pick the charges back up. And even if we do divorce and then get back together after, the same thing will happen." Ennis sighed and gently pushed Jack down back into his chair, and then knelt down beside him. "Darlin'...please believe me. I can't leave you, no matter what the reason. I don't want to."

Jack smiled sadly down at him when Ennis cupped his cheeks. "Ennis...I don't know what we're gonna do. I believe you when you say you won't leave me, but...this is hard. I'm tired of this whole thing, tired of fighting...I don't like it."

"My parents are to blame," Ennis pointed out. "They're the ones doing this to us and all we can do is keep fighting. Look...it's your birthday tomorrow and we should celebrate. We've both taken the day off for this and we should make the most of it. Alright?"

Jack nodded. "You're right, we should. I'm sorry that I keep getting like this, bud. I don't mean to just fall apart on you like this. I keep feeling sorry for myself, not even asking how you're coping with your parents doing this to you."

Ennis shrugged. "I hated it at first, still do. And yeah...I'm hurt that they would do this and that they just can't accept you. But now...I'm more concerned about taking care of you and keeping you out of jail. That's all that matters to me now. I don't want them in my life anymore, so now I'm focusing on my future with you."

Jack sniffed and leaned down, shakily pressing his lips to Ennis's. He was truly grateful that Ennis wasn't giving up on him, but he knew that he had to try and keep it together. "I love you," he replied when they broke apart.

"I love you too," Ennis murmured, nuzzling his nose. "Tell you what; you go and sit down. I'll do the dishes and then come join you. Alright?" Jack nodded and got up, grinning when Ennis hugged him.

"You're a good man," he whispered in Ennis's ear. "You know that, right?"

"I try to be, for you," Ennis replied, squeezing him tightly as if he never wanted to let go.

* * *

On Friday morning, Jack woke up to feel Ennis kissing his neck from the side. He smiled at the soft touch and turned to face his partner. "Morning to you too."

Ennis lifted his head to meet Jack's eyes. "Morning, darlin'. Happy Birthday." He leaned in to kiss Jack on the lips.

"Thanks," Jack replied, and he sighed. "I'm gonna try to enjoy today, Ennis. Really...I know you're just trying to make me happy."

Ennis nodded and kissed his cheek, wanting to lavish attention on him today. "Good. So...what d'you want for breakfast?"

"Surprise me," Jack said with a grin, happy that he was here with Ennis despite what was going on. Ennis truly wasn't going anywhere and he was very grateful for that. Ennis got out of bed and pulled his jeans on, giving Jack a wonderful view when he bent over. Jack started to move as well, but Ennis gently pushed him back down.

"Stay there; we'll have it in bed." Jack nodded and watched him leave, feeling happy for once. Today was just for the two of them.

Ennis thought about the day ahead as he cooked a full breakfast for them both, thinking about how they were going to spend it. He was happy to cook dinner as well, but he had hoped that Jack would want to venture outside for a while. But he understood how Jack wanted it to be just them all day, given how he was feeling right now. Maybe they could sit out on the balcony later.

He brought the breakfast into the bedroom and they ate together, occasionally reaching over for a kiss or to feed each other. It felt like how it was when they had first got together, and they were having fun. This was what they were fighting for; these little moments together that warmed their hearts and kept them together. They were still so much in love with each other and neither of them wanted to see it end.

"That was great," Jack sighed when they were finished, stretching. Ennis smiled at him.

"So what do you wanna do today? You sure you don't want to go out for a few hours?"

Jack looked at him. "Ennis...I know you like walking around the city, and I do too, but...I'm just not up to it. I'm sorry..." Ennis put an arm around him.

"It's okay; I know how you're feeling. No tears today, okay? Gonna make you smile." He kissed Jack's cheek and saw him blush slightly. "There we go."

"Hey...do we still have that Twister game?" Jack asked. They had bought it some time ago, after realising how erotic it could be - especially when they played strip Twister. Ennis grinned.

"Yeah, we do. You wanna play it our special way? You up for starting something?"

Jack looked over his naked chest, smirking. "Maybe..." Ennis couldn't resist when Jack was looking at him like that.

"I'll go set it up," he said quickly, rushing out of bed and grabbing a shirt as he passed. The idea was to be fully dressed when they started, eventually stripping off completely and then going at each other.

Ten minutes later, they were on the mat and Jack was about to use the spinner. "You ready? Remember, clothing off after you move."

"Let's go," Ennis replied, grinning at him.

"Alright...left hand green." They moved each other around the mat until they were both only wearing their underwear, feeling heat in the air between them as their bodies drew closer. They always loved playing this game together.

"Where now?" Ennis asked, looking around. He was to Jack's right, with one leg in between Jack's from behind and both of them facing the mat.

"Um...left hand red." Ennis saw that the only red spot was on Jack's other side, which meant he would be leaning across him. He bit back a grin and moved his hand to the spot, removing his underwear with his other hand. Jack saw him being exposed and couldn't help but feel aroused at the sight.

Jack moved his left hand over to his right to get to a blue spot and removed his own underwear, but he could no longer hold himself up with the twisting around. He fell to the mat and groaned. "Alright, you win."

Ennis smiled and lay down on top of him, kissing his neck. Then he heard a beautiful sound from beneath him; Jack was laughing. "Hey..." He nuzzled Jack's cheek.

"Can't help it," Jack replied, turning over onto his back and smiling up at Ennis. His smile was reaching his eyes. "That was fun."

"Sure was," Ennis agreed, kissing him on the mouth. He felt Jack moan softly. "I love to see you laughing, darlin'. You've been really upset lately..."

Jack nodded and wrapped his arms around Ennis's neck. "Yeah. But you're doing everything you can to cheer me up. Least I can do is meet you halfway and try to cheer up. I appreciate it, I really do."

Ennis pulled him up into a sitting position and hugged him tightly. "I'm just trying to make things better, Jack. Don't like seeing you hurt, never have. And if I can't persuade my parents to drop this, then...I'll just have to focus on you and our fight. That's all we can do now..."

After a while, they got dressed again; they wanted to save it for later in front of the fire. They went out onto the balcony and sat in the same chair again, gazing out at their wonderful view of Manhattan and the water. They were very happy here and Ennis hoped that they weren't about to lose this; it just wouldn't be the same for him without Jack. He tugged his partner a little closer and sighed, feeling as if everything he needed was right here in his arms. Jack had soon become everything to him, the one person he couldn't live without, and he was terrified of losing that. Hopefully, he wouldn't.

* * *

When evening fell, they ate dinner together at the table and then Jack started looking towards the fireplace, thinking about the romantic night they had planned. He was very much looking forward to it and knew that Ennis was too; making love together was something that they had always cherished, right from the start.

"You wanna get things set up while I do the dishes?" Ennis asked him, seeing how he kept looking over there. Jack nodded and got up, smiling at him before heading to the bedroom. They had planned to bring their quilt and pillows out with them and sleep there afterwards when they were done.

While Ennis did the dishes, he heard Jack moving around and arranging their makeshift bed in front of the fireplace. He couldn't wait for them to lie down there together and just let things happen; he wanted to put a smile on Jack's face and make him feel loved, just how he deserved. It wasn't just about the physical act itself, but more about the emotions behind it and how much they loved each other; that was more important to him than just getting off. He knew that Jack felt the same way.

When he was done, he locked the front door and looked towards the fireplace; Jack had lit it and was now standing there waiting, looking slightly nervous. Ennis moved over to him and took his hands. "Just let me take over," he whispered, nuzzling his lover's nose. Jack nodded and closed his eyes when Ennis kissed him.

What happened next was slightly blurry in the firelight, but Jack was aware of each of his senses as it happened. He saw the look of pure love in Ennis's eyes as their clothes were removed, making him feel as if he were made of glass, precious to the touch. He felt how Ennis was holding onto him as they lay down, caressing his skin gently and sending shivers through his spine. He heard the whispers of adoration in his ear as Ennis told him how beautiful he was, yearning for each other as Ennis prepared himself.

Jack could taste familiarity as Ennis kissed him, a warm wet tongue pushing into his mouth as Ennis pushed between his legs, making him tremble with arousal. And when Ennis leaned down and started moving inside him, Jack could smell his heat and want. To know that someone could feel this way about him had always humbled Jack, and he knew in his heart that he felt exactly the same about Ennis.

"Oh God," he breathed when his brain finally caught up with him. "Ennis..."

"I love you," Ennis murmured as he rocked steadily into him. This feeling was incomparable as far as he was concerned; there was nothing like it. He heard the small whimpers escaping from Jack as he moved, knowing that he was doing everything that Jack loved. He enjoyed kissing Jack as their bodies connected, curling their tongues around each other. "Don't ever doubt that..."

He pulled Jack up slightly so that he could wrap his arms around him, still moving inside him and groaning. "I...I love you too," Jack managed to croak out, head tilting back to the pillow. "Ennis, I...oh God..."

Ennis trailed a hand down Jack's stomach and took hold of him, moving it along in time to his thrusts and hearing a low, guttural moan escape from Jack; that did it. He felt hot, sticky fluid hit his stomach in ribbons and thrust even harder as Jack bucked underneath him, until he too felt himself coming.

He collapsed onto Jack, breathing heavily. It had been even better than he'd hoped for, and Jack certainly seemed happy enough.

"Ennis...that was amazing," he breathed, grinning breathlessly when their eyes met. His hair was plastered to his forehead, his cheeks were flushed pink and his eyes were a little hazy, but Ennis loved the sight of him. He pulled out of Jack and settled himself down.

"You look beautiful, darlin'...even when you look like this." He kissed the tip of Jack's nose and ran his fingers through the dark locks. "I swear...you look really happy..."

Jack smiled up at him, love in his eyes. "That's because of you. God, Ennis...you make me really happy, you know. And times like this, like what we just did...I can't even describe it. It's like...when we're together like this, everything just makes sense, you know? Like this is how we're meant to be and this is what we're supposed to do."

Ennis nodded, stroking his cheek gently. "I know exactly what you mean. Did you enjoy today?"

"I did. I know we didn't do much, but it was perfect. I got to spend all day with you, and that makes me happy. I know that on normal days, it's okay for us to spend time apart while we work and stuff, but...I do miss you. I bet there are some couples who drive each other mad because they spend so much time together, but I can't see that happening with us. I love spending as much time as I can with you."

"Me too. There's some who say that spending so much time together is...unhealthy or whatever. But I don't feel that. But it's like you said...we do spend just enough time apart for us to look forward to seeing each other again. I wouldn't have it any other way."

"Me neither." Then Jack yawned and Ennis smiled at him. He looked very endearing when he did that.

"Come on, let's get under." They crawled underneath the quilt, lying on the sheets together and moving in close. This had been a very romantic night for both of them and they were happy with the end result. Jack curled up against Ennis, who held him close. "Night, darlin'."

"Night, baby," Jack murmured tiredly, closing his eyes. He was happy and warm and safe, and knew that he would remain so as long as Ennis was there.

* * *

A couple of hours later, Ennis woke up to see that the fire was dying out. He and Jack were already warm by now so he didn't see the need to get up. Jack was still in his arms but had now shifted to his other side, facing away from Ennis. With a smile, Ennis remembered that this was Jack's favourite sleeping position, especially when he was feeling vulnerable.

_You're so beautiful, _he thought as he watched Jack sleep. He felt his heart swell with love and settled back down, softly pressing a kiss to the back of Jack's neck.

He hadn't been asleep for long when Jack started having a nightmare. He groaned in his sleep and scrunched his eyes up as the visions swam before him.

"_John C Twist Junior, you stand accused of attempted murder of your_ _husband Ennis Del Mar, by transmission of the HIV virus..."_

"_It's not true! It was an accident," Jack pleaded when they didn't believe him. Ennis's parents were looking smug and triumphant. As for Ennis himself, he looked helpless and heartbroken; there was nothing they could do. "Please..."_

"_Have the jury come to a decision?" asked the judge, and a woman stood up._

"_Yes, Your Honour," she replied._

"_Do you find the defendant guilty or not guilty of the charges?"_

"_Guilty," she replied. Jack felt his stomach clench; this couldn't be happening._

"_No..." he breathed, looking to Ennis. His partner looked at him, both of them knowing that it was over._

"_Very well," replied the judge. "John C Twist Junior, you have been found guilty of attempted murder via transmission of the HIV virus. The severity of this crime incurs a prison sentence of a minimum of eight years without parole. Case closed." The judge banged the gavel and Jack turned to look at Ennis, defeat in his eyes._

"_I love you," he mouthed, and Ennis nodded back, tears in his own eyes. Then Jack found himself in a prison being led down the corridor, until they showed him to a room._

_His breath left his body when he saw his cellmate. Dirty blonde hair that was all too familiar. The figure turned and Jack froze at the predatory grin on his face._

"_Well, Jack Twist," said Daniel Waters, leering when the door shut. "No escaping for you this time." Then Jack felt the other man grab him._

Jack sat bolt upright, yelling out with fear. Ennis jerked awake and saw the state he was in. "Jack?" He too sat up when he saw how wide Jack's eyes were and that he sweating. But when he put a hand on Jack's shoulder, he jumped away and wrapped his arms around his knees. Ennis didn't know what to do when Jack started sobbing, shaking all over. "Jack?" he repeated softly, moving close but not touching him. "Darlin', talk to me."

"Nightmare," Jack choked out. "Day of the trial...they found me guilty. But then..."

"What?" Ennis asked, although he could already guess. There was only one person who could scare Jack like that.

"They led me to a prison cell. Daniel Waters was there. He...he grabbed me..." Jack trembled again and Ennis wished he could comfort him.

"Jack, look at me. Come on..." He tentatively placed his hand on Jack's shoulder again, relieved when Jack didn't flinch. Slowly, Jack turned to look at him. His eyes were bloodshot and so full of terror that it nearly broke Ennis's heart. If only his parents could see the damage they were doing.

"Ennis...I'm terrified," Jack whispered, still shaking. Very slowly, Ennis moved closer and coaxed Jack into his arms, making soothing sounds that he knew would help. Jack allowed himself to be held, feeling safe now that Ennis was here. "I..."

"I know, bud. I'm really sorry you had to go through that...but I'm gonna make sure that it never becomes real, okay? It's just a dream and that's how it's gonna stay."

"You don't know that," Jack replied, trying to calm down. "You can't guarantee that I won't be found guilty. There's every chance I could be, and then..." He sniffed and Ennis started rubbing his back.

"Shh...calm down, Jack. Won't do you any good to panic, you know. Try and calm down...it wasn't real, and I'm here now. Shh..."

Eventually, Jack managed to stop shaking and he pulled his face away from Ennis's shoulder. "I got you all wet," he said, wiping Ennis's shoulder from where he'd been crying into it. Ennis shrugged.

"That's what I'm here for." He thumbed Jack's tears from his cheeks and eyes, kissing his face as he did so. Jack smiled in spite of himself, enjoying the soft touches. "You gonna be okay?"

Jack nodded. "Yeah, now that you're here. It was...really scary, Ennis. So real..."

"Well, it wasn't," Ennis assured him. "And I swear...I'm gonna do everything I can to make sure it never is. Alright?" Jack nodded again and Ennis nodded back down to the pillows. "You wanna try for some more sleep?"

"Yeah..." They lay back down facing each other, Ennis holding onto Jack tightly. He gently pressed his lips to Jack's, glad that he was finally still and no longer shaking. That kind of nightmare must have affected him badly, and Ennis was scared for him. What if he had more as the trial loomed closer? What if he had one where Daniel Waters actually did attack him again? He wasn't sure if he could help Jack recover from that one so quickly, but then he realised he didn't care; he would stay by Jack's side and soothe him, no matter how long it took.

When Jack fell asleep again, Ennis felt a protective surge rise up inside him. If he'd had it in him, he would have killed that bastard with his own hands for hurting Jack. But he knew he couldn't; he had to stay here and take care of Jack; he was needed and he knew he would do anything to take the pain away.


	16. Chapter 16

**Chapter 16**

_October 15th, 2012_

On Monday, Ennis and Jack were due to meet for lunch again in the city. Despite what else was going on in their lives, their lawyer had told them that it would be for the best if they tried to carry on with their day-to-day lives as normal. Ennis could see the sense in this and he hoped that Jack did too.

As it was, they were trying to continue with their adoption application. They had been working on it at every opportunity when Jack felt up to it, and things were coming together now. Jack's mother Karen had written a letter of recommendation for them; they had considered asking Lureen, but she lived out of state so they hadn't wanted to risk it. As it was, Karen had written them a wonderful letter that showed them in a good light. She seemed very confident that they would make great parents despite their HIV status.

Apart from the nightmare, Jack had enjoyed his birthday. He'd had fun with Ennis playing strip Twister, and the night of lovemaking in front of the fire had been wonderful. Ennis had made him momentarily forget everything that was going on, and he appreciated it greatly.

Jack walked down the street towards the café where they were going to meet. He always looked forward to this time of day, to see Ennis during a busy work day. As he rounded the corner, he spotted Ennis walking towards him and grinned. "Hey, you."

"Hey, darlin'..." They kissed when they met up outside the café, happy to see each other again. Sometimes it felt like days when they were apart. "Have a good morning?"

"Yeah, it was fine. The guys have all been really supportive, talking to me about the case. I didn't tell anybody about the nightmare, not even Sam. Couldn't do it." By now, Ennis had Jack in his arms, fingers locked at his back.

"Well...at least you're coping with it," Ennis pointed out, smiling at him. Jack had recovered over the weekend, to his relief. They'd managed to have sex last night and it had been very enjoyable for both of them. Ennis could remember having his head in between Jack's legs for a time before pushing into him. He grinned at the memory.

"You're thinking about last night, aren't you?" Jack asked when he saw Ennis grinning. There was no mistaking that look.

"Can't help it. Sure was good to be like that." He kissed Jack again and let go of him, taking his hand instead and leading him into the café. "Anyway, what d'you want for lunch?"

They sat down in a corner table, looking out of the window as they did so. This city was always so full of life and they loved it.

As they waited for their food, Ennis reached over and entwined his fingers with Jack's, smiling at him. "So, our adoption application. What did you think of your mom's letter?"

"Yeah, I liked it," Jack agreed. "I mean, Peter said that whoever wrote it could be as biased as they wanted, showing us in the best light possible. And she certainly did that, didn't she?"

"Sure did. Jack, I've been meaning to ask...are you okay with us carrying on with the application? With everything that's going on? It's like you said...there is a chance that you'll be found guilty and I know it'll be hard for us if we get our hopes up. If we're put on a waiting list...and then..."

Jack nodded. "I see what you mean, Ennis. I know it's hard, but maybe it's a good thing that we're carrying on with it. If we put it on hold now, and everything turns out okay, it could be a while before we get things started up again. At least this way, we're preparing for whatever could happen."

"And...if you are locked up?" Ennis asked, choosing his words carefully when he remembered Jack's nightmare. Jack sighed, looking down.

"Then that's it. When I'm released, I don't think they'd let me adopt a child with that kind of record. I'm sorry if that happens..."

Ennis shook his head. "Don't worry about it. I'd rather be with you and childless than without you and having even one kid." He smiled. "I love you too much to be without you."

Jack smiled back at him. "Well...let's just try to focus on our application for now. Looks like it's going well, with that letter. I'm glad my mom was able to do it for us."

"Me too. She did say that she wanted to help us however she could, so...I guess she gets something out of it too, you know?"

"I know she's looking forward to being a grandma," Jack pointed out. "But I'm guessing you won't want your parents having any contact?"

"No, not after this. I know they'd be grandparents but...they've ruined any chance they did have of having contact. If we have a kid, I don't want them telling him or her that one of their dads is a deranged murderer or something," Ennis replied bitterly. "Even if you're not charged, they were still willing to do it and...I hate them for it. As soon as this is over, I'm cutting them off for good. I'll tell them at the trial if I have to."

Jack could recall the years in which he had not spoken to his own father due to him hating how Jack was positive, and it pained him that Ennis was going through something similar. But this was still Ennis's choice and he respected that. He could be honest; he understood why Ennis felt like this.

"Fair enough," he agreed as they ate. "So...let's talk about something else. What d'you reckon about going over to Long Island sometime, to see my mom?"

"Yeah, I'd like that." And soon enough, they were talking about more pleasant things to take their minds off the trial. It was all they could do right now.

* * *

The day was uneventful, which Ennis and Jack both welcomed at the moment. With every new day, Jack was reminded of how the trial loomed ever closer. There was just over four weeks to go now and he was starting to get nervous, despite the numerous attempts from Ennis, Karen and even Lureen that everything would be okay.

Ennis was doing everything he could to try and take Jack's mind off the whole thing, even though he knew that he wasn't having much success. Jack wouldn't be able to truly relax until all of this was over, so they just had to wait it out. Ennis sometimes wondered if Jack's sanity would last that long, given how scared he was.

He'd spoken to Jack's mother and Lureen a few times for advice on what to do, and all they could suggest were the things he was already doing. Still, he knew that Jack appreciated how he was always there for him. In bed at night, he would hold Jack closer than ever in an attempt to make him feel safe. There hadn't been any more nightmares but Jack still had trouble falling asleep. He considered buying some lavender oil; Lureen swore by it when she couldn't sleep. Jack had seemed afraid to go to sleep, and Ennis knew he was scared of having more nightmares so was thus trying to stay awake. This wasn't healthy and he knew it; he had to do something to make Jack fall asleep if he wouldn't do it himself willingly. He didn't like to manipulate Jack but this was for his own good.

"You alright?" he asked Jack softly as they sat on the sofa after dinner, idly watching TV. Jack nodded, seeming to shake himself out of his reverie.

"Yeah, fine. Just...thinking. Four weeks left..." Jack sounded distant and Ennis knew how much he was worrying about it. He couldn't even imagine how terrifying it must have been for Jack that day in the park so many years ago, and how it was all coming back to him now.

"I know. But just remember, we've got a good defence and I reckon we can win this, you know? We just have to try and not panic."

Jack sighed, resting his head against Ennis's chest. "Can't help it. That nightmare, Ennis...it really shook me up badly. It was so real, like I was really there. And then seeing his face..." A shiver ran through him and Ennis felt it; he squeezed Jack gently to soothe him.

"Jack...it's alright. I know how much he scares you, after what he did. And I would rather break his legs than let him go after you again. But he's locked away and there's no guarantee that you will be too. The two cases are completely different. He preyed on two strangers because he's sick in the head, so he deserved to be locked up. You accidentally infected your partner. I consented to having sex with you that night, and I've always known about your HIV status. So it's just like Peter said; even if it had been on purpose, I would've given my permission to be infected. Which, in turn, makes my parents' claims false."

"You're right, and I know that," Jack agreed. "It's just this fear of being locked up...it's messing me up and I hate it. And I'm sorry to say this, but...I hate your parents for doing this." He didn't like admitting this, but it was true. He felt more resentful towards them every time he broke down; this was all their fault.

"You're not the only one," Ennis told him, kissing the top of his head. "I do too. Tell you what...let's go to bed. You want a backrub?" If it helped Jack fall asleep, he was willing to do it; Jack needed some rest and Ennis would have to take matters into his own hands.

"Mmm...that sounds good," Jack agreed, nodding. They moved off the sofa and Ennis locked up while Jack went into the bedroom. He smiled when Ennis entered the room; there was nobody else that Jack trusted more than this man. He was sure that Ennis would never hurt him, certainly not on purpose. And Ennis would actively try and prevent hurting him by accident. Ennis still hadn't quite forgiven himself for their brief break-up and what it had taken to knock some sense into him.

"Come here," Ennis said softly, reaching for his buttons. He kissed Jack's neck as he removed the shirt, tossing it to the floor. Then they knelt down onto the bed and stretched out, Jack lying on his front with his head resting on his arms. Neither of them was after sex tonight; Ennis wanted to help Jack sleep. "Just relax, bud."

He grabbed the massage oil and warmed it between his hands, then straddled Jack and went to work. He slowly rubbed his hands over Jack's shoulders, hearing a sigh escape from him. "That's good..." Ennis always seemed to know what he needed, and he could feel himself succumbing to the fatigue that had plagued him over the past few days.

Ennis lavished attention all over the glowing skin, looking down at Jack lovingly as he did so. He worked out the tension in Jack's muscles, smoothing them out and seeing how Jack was relaxing underneath him. "You feel better?"

"Mmmhmm," came a mumble from Jack, his eyes closed. After another minute, Ennis heard the shift in Jack's breathing; he had fallen asleep, at long last.

_Thank God, _he thought to himself. Hopefully Jack wouldn't have any more nightmares tonight; that was definitely something to be happy about and they could make the most of such a reprieve.

He removed his own shirt and pulled the quilt over them both, hoping not to disturb Jack now that he was sleeping. He moved closer to his lover but didn't touch him; Jack needed this. Instead, he simply smiled and pressed a soft kiss to Jack's shoulder. "Night, darlin'," he whispered before closing his own eyes.

* * *

_October 18th, 2012_

On Thursday, Ennis and Jack both ended up with the afternoon off so decided to go home early. They always preferred it when they were alone together, and not just so they could have sex if the mood struck them. They were comfortable in each other's presence.

At the moment, they were sat at either end of the sofa with their socked feet meeting in the middle. Ennis was reading the newspaper and absent-mindedly playing footsie with Jack, who was trying to talk to Lureen on his laptop.

"So how're things over there?" he asked her. She looked well these days and he hoped that she was happy. If they weren't trying to adopt and he'd thought that Lureen wasn't happy over there, he would have considered asking her to move in with them; she had always been like a sister to him.

"I'm doing good. Making some money now and everything's fine. Not dating anyone right now, but I'm always looking."

Jack nodded. "I hope you find someone, Lu. I reckon you're a great catch; a guy would be lucky to have you. Um...you sure you're not into women? Just asking..."

She grinned. "No, I'm not. Might be easier if I was, but I'm into guys. Still, I guess that if I did fall for a woman it wouldn't be so scary. Things are changing all the time for gay people and you never know; that Proposition 8 could be repealed at any time."

"That's true," he agreed. "But I can't see us living in California ever again, even if it is. We've moved on, you know?"

"I know. And I never thought I'd see you living in New York ever again, but there you are. Looks like you've got yourself someone really special, Jack."

Jack looked up and saw that Ennis's cheeks had turned pink; he'd heard that. "I sure have," he replied, nudging Ennis's feet with his own.

"So, how have you been? Ennis told me about your nightmare and how you've not been sleeping."

Jack sighed. "I didn't know he'd told you that..."

"I had to," Ennis cut in, looking at him sadly. "I needed advice on what to do for you, and she's worried about you."

"He's right, Jack," Lureen added. "Don't be mad at him."

"I'm not," he replied truthfully, then gave a weary smile. "I'm glad I've got you guys."

"So...?" she prompted. "How are you feeling now?"

"Better," he assured her. "He tricked me the other night; gave me a backrub just to make me fall asleep."

"You weren't gonna do it on your own," Ennis replied, eyes scanning over the paper. Jack smiled.

"I know. You were just trying to do the right thing and I appreciate it." Lureen cleared her throat, trying to get his attention.

"Alright, you two lovebirds. As long as you're feeling okay now, Jack. I know that none of this is easy but you've just got to try and plough through it. You hear me?"

"Yes, ma'am," he replied, smirking at her; she'd always hated it when he called her that, saying that it made her feel old. He caught Ennis smirking too.

Lureen scowled at him, just as he'd predicted. "Don't call me that."

"Sorry. So we'll see you soon?"

"Hopefully, yeah. As soon as I can get some time off, I'll let you know. Bye, Jack. Bye, Ennis!" she said louder so he could hear her.

They said goodbye to her and Jack put the laptop on the coffee table, giving Ennis a look; his partner was still reading the paper. He crawled forward until he was up close to Ennis, grinning. Ennis met his eyes. "Can I help you?" he teased, putting his paper aside. He knew that look.

"Maybe," Jack replied, leaning in. They kissed for a few moments and Jack settled himself on Ennis's chest, his ear over Ennis's heart. "Just wanted to be near you."

Ennis wrapped his arms around him, kissing the top of his head. "Don't have to ask for that, Jack. You know I like having you right near me. Love holding you..."

"Mmm..." Jack closed his eyes, feeling warm and cosy here. He could fall asleep, which was probably a good thing. Ennis just felt so secure to him, like he would protect him from anything. It was a good feeling, one that he would never tire of as long as he lived. "I love you."

Ennis smiled down at him, looking over to the balcony doors when he realised that it had started to rain. He had always loved being inside and warm while it rained outside. Especially since he was here with Jack; a warm weight on his stomach that he never wanted to be rid of.

The rain pounded on the gravel of the balcony, but Jack didn't stir as he had indeed fallen asleep again; Ennis figured he was catching up with the sleep he'd deprived himself of. He gently stroked Jack's hair, thinking. He couldn't say for sure what would happen at the trial, but he did know that if Jack was sent to prison, it wouldn't be the end. Even if he couldn't get Jack out as soon as he would like, he would still be there when Jack was released. No matter what Jack might have been subjected to while inside, no matter how badly damaged he might be, Ennis knew he would still want to be with him. Jack could undergo therapy to help him with whatever he'd been through, and Ennis hoped that his unwavering love could help with the recovery. There were options, even if Jack was too scared to see them right now.

As he held Jack in his arms, Ennis briefly wished that he was the one facing the charges, so that Jack wouldn't suffer anymore. But then he realised that he didn't want Jack to be worrying as he was either. It was a vicious cycle and he didn't know where it might end.

* * *

Jack had been asleep for about half an hour, during which time Ennis had also fallen asleep. The rain soon stopped but it was still grey outside, and both of them were completely oblivious as they slept on. These were always Ennis's favourite days with Jack; when they could just forget the world and spend quiet time together.

There were no nightmares today; Jack was busy dreaming of Ennis and what it might be like for them to adopt a child. Hopefully, there would come a day when someone would call to tell them that there was a baby waiting to be taken home; that would be amazing. He was starting to get paternal feelings now and he hoped that they could be fulfilled.

Ennis was dimly aware of a ringing sound nearby, and he finally woke up in time to see Jack reaching for his phone on the coffee table. "Here you go," he said to Ennis with a smile. His eyes were starting to form sleep in the corners. "Didn't think you were gonna wake up in time."

"Thanks," he replied before putting the phone to his ear. "Hello?"

"Is this Ennis Del Mar or Jack Twist?" asked a female voice at the other end. Ennis cleared his throat while Jack lay back down, watching him. He rubbed the sleep out of his eyes, which Ennis found inexplicably endearing.

"Del Mar," he replied. "Who's calling?"

"Mr Del Mar, I'm Claire Simmons from the adoption agency. I understand that you and your husband Mr Twist made an application earlier this week?"

"Yeah, we did," he said to her, running a hand along Jack's back comfortably. He could have sworn that he heard Jack purr at the contact. "So what's this about?"

"I just wanted to let you know that your application is being processed and is awaiting approval. It shouldn't take long."

"Oh, okay. Do you have any idea how long?" he asked her. Jack looked up at him in confusion.

"We're aiming for the first week of November," she informed him. "If it all goes well, then I will be making a visit soon after to assess your living space and meet you in person. I hope this is okay."

"Yeah, that's fine," he replied, smiling down at Jack. "We look forward to it. Okay, bye." He hung up, exhaling.

"What was that about?" asked Jack, deep blue eyes fixed on him. Ennis smiled wider, putting his phone back and looking down at him.

"Woman from the adoption agency. She says our application is being processed and is awaiting approval."

"Really?" Jack asked, eyes now lighting up. "That's great!" He kissed Ennis on the lips. "So did she say how long it might be?"

"She said the first week of November, with her visiting soon after if it's alright." Jack's eyes lowered, seeming to deflate before his eyes. It didn't take a genius to figure out why.

"November...it'd have to be before the fourteenth," he said quietly. "I might not be around after..."

Ennis sighed and pulled him back down. "Come on, Jack. Don't go thinking like that. You don't know what might happen. It might all work out for us."

Jack groaned. "I know, and that's what gets me. I know deep down that there's a good chance I'll be found not guilty. But every time I think about what could happen, it just makes me think that there's not much chance after all." He pulled away from Ennis and sat up, rubbing the back of his head. "I know it's completely irrational but I can't help it."

Ennis sat up too, sighing. "Jack...don't let it get to you. As far as I can see, you've got every reason to think like that. You're scared, and people do think the worst when they're scared. I bet that right now, you can't even picture them not finding you guilty, right?"

"Yeah...I can only see what I'm scared of," Jack admitted, seeing the sense that Ennis was making. "I'm a basket case, aren't I?" Ennis grasped his shoulder supportively, giving it a slight shake.

"No, you're just human. Which is more than I can say for my parents right now," he added bitterly, and Jack half-smiled.

"I guess." He turned to face his partner. "What would I do without you, huh?" Ennis smiled at him.

"You'll never have to worry about that," he promised, taking Jack's hand and kissing it. "I swear, Jack."

Jack smiled back and then looked away, staring at the empty fireplace. He had a flashback of his birthday, when they had made love right here and then fallen asleep. Ennis saw his eyes flicking over the space before them and realised what he was thinking about. "I know, darlin'. If everything goes well for us, we'll have more nights like that to celebrate."

"Sounds good to me," Jack sighed, stretching. That was something to look forward to. "You hungry? I could do with something."

Ennis looked at his watch; it was about time for dinner anyway. "Yeah, sure. What d'you want?"

"I'll make it," Jack offered. "Come on and tell me what you want." He got up and took Ennis's hand, pulling him up off the sofa and leading him to the kitchen. Another memory flashed before him, of himself and Ennis christening this kitchen soon after moving; the top of the washing machine to be precise. That was a good day; he still couldn't remember how many times they'd done it. Every time he brought it up, Ennis would blush and mumble something about it being too many times to count. They did have a lot of sex but each time left them wanting more, which they stored up for their next encounter.

They found something to eat and Jack started cooking while Ennis set the table; they always worked as a team and were confident by now that they would make good parents. All they needed now was a win at the trial, which was easier said than done.

* * *

That evening, Ennis was lying on his back in bed letting his mind go blank; Jack had his head between his legs and was busy at work. Ennis felt as if he had done most of the work during sex ever since this whole thing had started, but he was more than willing to let Jack take over if he was up to it. He knew that Jack had been feeling vulnerable, so was happy to feed Jack's confidence, as it were. Whatever made Jack happy, he was all for it.

He kept thinking back to their conversation earlier; Jack seemed to know that his thoughts about being locked up were irrational, but he still couldn't help feeling that way. Ennis felt sorry for him; Jack didn't deserve to be dealing with this after everything else that he had been through. But his thoughts were fading as he became more aroused, leaking into Jack's mouth.

"You're so good at this," he sighed, tilting his head to the side. Jack grinned around him. Ennis's new HIV status meant that they could do anything at all without protection; there were no more barriers now and he did like that. He liked how they could taste everything that the other had to give; he felt as if it had brought them closer than ever. Every cloud had a silver lining, and this was theirs.

"You taste good," he murmured, lowering his head again. He snaked his hands up to Ennis's stomach, running them over the hard muscles and smooth skin. He didn't know why, but he just felt the need to be in control tonight. He figured it might give him some self-confidence. He was already starting to leak onto the bed and didn't even need to touch himself to come.

Ennis felt his stomach tightening as his orgasm loomed closer, his breathing now coming in quick bursts. "Oh God!" he groaned and felt himself let go. Jack took it all, swallowing down the thick liquid he loved to taste; it was just so uniquely Ennis and maybe that was why he liked it so much. Nobody else knew what this was like and he liked that; they completely belonged to each other.

Jack shot onto the bed between his own legs and sighed, letting go of Ennis. He then kissed his way up Ennis's body, eventually reaching his mouth. They kissed deeply for a few moments and Jack settled down next to him. "You enjoy that?" he murmured, smiling over at his lover. Ennis nodded, eyes still closed. His chest was still heaving as he tried to catch his breath. It always amazed him how good Jack was at that.

"Sure did. You're in a good mood tonight. You feeling okay?" Jack had certainly seemed like his old self tonight, which gave Ennis some hope that he would be alright. He was still half-expecting Jack to have at least one more nightmare before this was over; it was almost inevitable and he knew it.

"Yeah, I'm fine," Jack replied. He stretched. "I really enjoyed today, Ennis. Lying with you on the sofa..." He had enjoyed being held like that; Ennis made him feel safe like nobody else ever could. He would sorely miss this if the trial didn't go their way, and he prayed that it would.

"Mmm, sure was good," Ennis agreed, opening his eyes. "I like it when it's raining outside, and we're in here all warm and cosy. It's really nice." From the high floor where they lived, it sometimes felt as if they were high above the world.

Jack curled up against him, resting his head on Ennis's chest. "Yeah. Helps me to forget everything for a moment, you know? I mean, it doesn't work for very long because of what's going on, but..." He trailed off, hoping that he'd made sense. Sometimes he felt as if his thoughts were so muddled that it helped to talk to Ennis about them; they could make sense of it all together. Ennis truly was his other half and Jack felt very lucky to have met him; it was one of the few good things to come out of being positive, for that had been the reason for his move to California.

"I know what you mean," Ennis replied, kissing the top of his head. Jack made a sigh of contentment, snuggling even closer to his warmth. "I'm just trying to make you happy, Jack...as much as I can." This was the one thing that he wanted more than anything else.

"You do," Jack assured him, turning to face him. "You really do, Ennis. You make me laugh, you're always there as a shoulder to cry on...you're really good to me, you know. When I was younger, and I first heard about what love was like, I never really knew it could be like this...every time we're together, I just..." He thought for a moment, trying to figure out what he wanted to say. But he realised that there were no words that would sufficiently describe what he felt. "I don't know...can't seem to say what I'm feeling..."

Ennis cupped his cheek. "It's okay, bud. I know what you mean. I feel the same way too. You know, I thought about it...the fact that we can't seem to say what we're feeling. Maybe it just means that our feelings are so strong that we just can't describe them."

"That's a good way of looking at it," Jack agreed, smiling. "Guess you're right." He settled down, sighing. "My feelings for you are really strong, Ennis...I'd be scared of them if they didn't make me so happy. I love you so much..."

Ennis wrapped Jack up in his arms, feeling as if his heart would burst with how happy he was. "Same to you, bud." He held Jack close until he fell asleep, hoping that tomorrow would be good for them too. Every day that Jack was happy was a good day for him.


	17. Chapter 17

**Chapter 17**

_October 20th, 2012_

With less than four weeks until the trial, Jack was starting to really worry. They had a meeting with Peter today but he honestly couldn't see what good it might do. He and Ennis knew what they had to do if they were going to win this fight, so he figured there was nothing else to say now, unless he had something to tell them.

Lying in bed that morning, Jack was staring at the ceiling and listening to Ennis's breathing; he could dimly hear sounds outside, such as cars and birds, but the sounds next to him were far preferable to him.

_I can't lose this, _he thought desperately to himself as Ennis slept on. _It'll destroy everything we've worked for. I don't wanna be without him._

Jack sighed and slid out of bed, needing to stretch his legs; it was about time to get up anyway. Normally, whoever woke up first would wait for the other until they woke up, but he didn't want to disturb Ennis right now.

He silently pulled his jeans on and left the bedroom, crossing the dark apartment to the kitchen and getting himself some water. He sat at the table, thinking about the trial and what it would mean for them if he was found guilty. Ennis had already promised to wait for him, but Jack thought of his nightmare; he had been sentenced for eight years, which sounded about right for such an offence. Would Ennis honestly wait that long? He would like to believe so, but it wasn't fair; Ennis would need someone even if it wasn't him.

Tears sprung to his eyes at the thought of Ennis with someone else; even just the notion caused him pain. He could be in prison, probably being abused on a regular basis, and he wouldn't be able to think of Ennis without imagining him with someone else. He hated this whole situation and he wished it could all be just a dream.

Ennis woke up soon after and found himself alone in the bed. He sat up, feeling worried; Jack didn't normally leave the bed without him unless something was wrong. "Jack?" he called out, but heard no reply. Maybe Jack was in the main room.

He pulled his jeans on and stepped out of the bedroom. "Jack?" he tried again, peering into the darkness.

"I'm at the table," Jack replied, and Ennis switched the kitchen lights on. Jack was there, hands wrapped around a glass of water and just wearing his jeans.

"What are you doing in the dark?" he asked, walking over. "What's wrong?" He sat down next to him, looking at him with such concern that it made Jack's heart ache. He remembered what Ennis had said; that it was okay to wake him up if he needed him.

"I just...woke up and got to thinking. Less than four weeks until the trial."

Ennis sighed and moved his chair next to Jack's, putting an arm around him. "I know, darlin'. I know how it gets to you and I wish it didn't."

"Ennis...you know that nightmare I had? Well, when they found me guilty, I was sentenced for eight years. That sounds normal for something like this, right?"

"I guess, but why...?"

"I got to thinking...what you said before about waiting for me. Are you really gonna be celibate for eight years?" Jack trusted Ennis completely, but he couldn't believe that someone could do that, even Ennis.

Ennis sighed. "Jack, not this again..."

"I have to ask," Jack told him, looking directly at him. "I need to know. It wouldn't be fair to you if I asked you to go without it for so long. So I'm not asking. But could you do it even if I didn't?"

"Yes, I could," Ennis told him. He knew it wouldn't be easy if he was faced with this choice, but he would remain faithful. "Jack, I made vows to you the day we got married. I promised to stay faithful and that's what I'm gonna do. I've never cheated on you and I'm not gonna start just because you'd be in prison."

Jack smiled slightly but still looked sad. "It's not fair to you. What if I said it's okay for you to get what you need, even just while I'm locked up?"

"Don't say it, Jack," Ennis warned. "I'm not hearing it. Don't you go telling me it's okay, because I know it's not. I know the idea of me with someone else hurts you, like it does for me. You're trying to be selfless and...I don't want that in this kind of decision. So just don't, okay? I'm not gonna be getting any as long as you're in prison and I'm okay with that. I'll survive. And there's still no guarantee that you're even gonna be locked up, remember?"

"We have to plan for the worst," Jack said in a low voice.

"Okay, fair enough. But not like this. Jack, please don't do this. You know as well as I do that your heart isn't in this. You don't want me with anyone else and I know that. Christ, when I think about what might happen to you in there...how the hell could I even consider it when you're suffering like that?" He took hold of Jack's cheeks with both hands, forcing him to meet his eyes. "Just cut it out," he said softly. "I appreciate what you're trying to do; that you're doing this for me. But I don't need that from you. I need you to understand that it's only ever gonna be you. I'm not gonna be doing anything that'll hurt you, okay?"

Jack nodded, trying with all his heart to believe this; it would take time before he did but he understood that Ennis was being genuine. He nodded and shuffled closer, allowing Ennis to embrace him as the tears came. His emotions bubbled close to the surface these days and there was nothing he could do about it.

* * *

After lunch, Ennis and Jack ventured out to the appointment with their lawyer. Although Jack didn't see what Peter could say to them that would make this any easier, he did appreciate how he was trying to help them.

Ennis kept glancing at him as they took the subway up to Manhattan; neither of them had spoken about that morning. After calming Jack down, Ennis had made them both breakfast and they had gotten dressed. Afterwards, Ennis had led Jack to the sofa and they had laid down for a while, not speaking but just relaxing together.

"You okay?" he asked Jack gently as they left the station. Jack nodded.

"Yeah, I'm fine," he replied, nodding. "Just...I'm sorry about this morning. I know that it must annoy you to keep reassuring me that you're not going anywhere, and I don't mean to do that to you."

Ennis squeezed his hand. "It's really okay, Jack. I'll be honest...it does get tiring for me to keep telling you that I'm staying with you, but I understand why you keep needing that." He stopped walking and Jack looked at him. "What you've gotta remember is that I love you, Jack."

Jack smiled at him. "I know, Ennis. I really do. I'm sorry about how this whole thing is messing me up...can't help it." Ennis kissed his cheek.

"Don't worry about it. Come on." They carried on down the street, heading for Peter's office. If there was anybody who could help them, it was him. When Ennis had first met him, during his and Jack's trip here two years ago, it had soon become clear to him that Peter wasn't just Jack's family lawyer; he was a good friend to them as well and was going out of his way to help them. He appreciated that now.

They sat in the waiting room until they were called in, both of them wondering what he might have to tell them. Ennis hoped it was good news.

"Good to see you two. How have you been?" Peter asked when they sat down.

"Um...best as can be," Ennis told him, not wanting to go into detail of how badly Jack was being affected. Although he trusted Peter, Ennis thought that it was something best kept between him and Jack; his partner might not want anyone else to know, not even Karen.

"Good. Well, I've been talking to some experts regarding the trial. I've got some news for you, something which may help your defence."

"Really? What's that?" Ennis asked, and Jack raised his head hopefully.

"Ennis, you remember saying that your father had stolen the medical records?"

"Yeah, why?"

"Well, those records are highly confidential. The theft of them, if proven, will look very interesting to a judge and a jury. It would certainly put them in a bad light. I'm thinking it could certainly cast some doubt on the validity of their claims. For them to do something illegal like that, it shows how keen they are on getting Jack locked up. That proves that they don't have much faith in their accusations and their chances without it. So..."

"It proves that they know the infection was an accident," Ennis finished, seeing where this was heading. "Which proves it _was_ an accident."

"Exactly," Peter replied, nodding. "So there is a chance for you."

"How do we prove it?" Jack asked. He did like the idea of something going their way for once, but he had to wonder if they could pull this off. He didn't see how it would work.

"There has to be a way. Ennis, do you know of any way to prove that the records were stolen?"

Ennis wracked his brains, thinking. There had to be a way...

"Oh...hang on..." He remembered something. There was a way, and he was starting to remember the house where he used to live with his parents. "There's a security camera outside the house," he told them. "CCTV...right outside and facing the street."

Peter nodded. "Could it have a view of the car when you parked it?"

"I think so...we parked on the street because my dad's car was in the driveway," Ennis remembered, and Jack was starting to feel hopeful. "God...do you think...?"

"It's entirely possible. I'll have a word with the police and see if they can get in touch with the force over in Mill Valley. They could send over the footage from that day and we can print out photos to use as evidence in your favour."

"Great...can you do that in time for the trial?" Ennis asked. Peter stood up.

"I can if we move fast enough. I'll call the police station and speak to an Inspector or something. They can do the rest and they'll let me know when they have something. Wait right here." He left the office and Ennis took Jack's hand.

"What d'you think?"

"I think it's a miracle," Jack replied, looking as if he couldn't quite believe it. "To think that we might have proof that they stole the records. And it's like you said...we can prove it was an accident." He managed to smile. "Can't believe it..."

"I know." Ennis put an arm around Jack and squeezed him. "See? Things are looking up." He pressed his head to Jack's, holding onto him and sighing.

Peter came back a short while later, looking pleased. "Okay, I've set the ball rolling. They'll get in touch with San Francisco police and obtain footage from that day. When they've got it, we need to go to the station and find the footage from the time you were there. Hopefully, we'll find something. So, I'll let you know when they've got it."

Ennis nodded. "Thank you so much, Peter. We really appreciate this." They shook his hand as they stood up, smiling at him.

"You're welcome. Best of luck to you both and let me know if you need anything." They bid goodbye to him and left the office, feeling more hopeful than before.

* * *

_October 22nd, 2012_

By Monday, Ennis and Jack had heard nothing from Peter. They were aware that it could take a while for the footage to be obtained, but they also knew that if they wanted to use it as evidence then they had to have it by the end of the month. Jack was pinning all of his hopes on this and Ennis knew that it was their only chance. They just had to prove that the records had been stolen, for his parents would never admit to it in front of a judge.

Ennis sometimes thought back to how things were when he was growing up with them. He did have some good memories, and he couldn't believe how things had turned out between them. Why couldn't they just accept what had happened?

"You reckon Peter has anything yet?" Jack asked as they lay on the sofa; they had another joint day off today and were making the most of it. Ennis was holding him from behind and rubbing his stomach. He shrugged.

"I don't know...but it could take some time. He only called the police a couple of days ago, and they have to get on to the police over there...could be a while yet."

Jack sighed. "I know, but I'm thinking this is our only chance...if this doesn't work we've got no proof that they stole the records. No proof that it was an accident..."

Ennis kissed the back of his neck. "I know, Jack. But try not to worry too much. I definitely remember that security camera now; it does face onto the street outside the house."

Just as they were thinking over this, Ennis's phone rang in his pocket; it was Peter.

"Ennis, can you and Jack make it to the station? We've got the footage from that day and we need you to take a look at it."

"Yeah, sure. We'll be right there," he replied, sitting up. Jack looked at him.

"What's going on?"

"That was Peter; they've got the footage," he replied, grinning. "Come on." Jack sprung up and they headed out of the door.

It was only a short walk to the station, and Peter was there waiting for them. There was an Inspector there, but thankfully not the same one who had interrogated Jack before. "Hey, you two. I think we've got what we were looking for."

He led them into a side room where there was a laptop set up on the table, and they noticed an empty DVD case next to it. On the screen was a paused video of the footage they had asked for. "Alright, take a seat," the Inspector instructed. "We got this from the San Francisco Police Department this morning, and I think we might have something."

He started playing the footage; they could see from the corner of the screen that it was the correct date and time of their visit to the house, which now felt like so long ago. They all watched as Ennis and Jack got out of the car and headed inside, and waited; it wouldn't be long.

Sure enough, about ten minutes later they saw Ennis's father leaving the house. He looked around and spotted the car. Ennis could feel his blood boil as his father opened the car door and snooped around, finding the envelope which they knew contained the medical records.

"That bastard," Ennis breathed, and Jack took his hand. He squeezed it in an attempt to calm him. "I knew it."

"So that is definitely your father, and you would be willing to state this in court?" the Inspector asked, and Ennis nodded.

"Yep, that's him." They watched as his father put the envelope into his own car and head back inside. Despite having taken the cigarettes with him, he never lit one while outside. He had planned this as soon as Ennis had told them about being positive. "So what do we do now?"

"We'll print out images from this to prove what happened, and they will be used as evidence against your parents."

"Would they be locked up for it?" Jack asked, feeling curious.

"For theft? Maybe a few months or more. But only if you decide to press charges, so it would only happen if you're found not guilty. Let's just concentrate on one thing at a time. Right now, it's more important to help you. We can deal with them when this is over."

Jack nodded and felt more hopeful than he had in weeks. "You're right. So...is there anything we can do right now?"

"I don't think so. But do get in touch if you need anything. And I'll let you know if anything else comes up. One more thing...Ennis, if you do speak to your parents again before the trial, don't tell them about this. It might be tempting, but as your lawyer I would advise you not to. They strike me as people who can be quite vindictive and I don't want this to backfire, given how it's your only chance to keep Jack free."

Ennis nodded, holding on tightly to Jack's hand. "I know. I don't think I'll talk to them again now but I don't know. I'll let them know that I'll do whatever it takes to fight them, but I won't say anything about this."

"Alright. You should go back home and get some rest, or maybe something to eat. And best of luck for your adoption application too," he added with a smile. "I hope the visit goes well."

They thanked him and headed outside, both of them feeling lighter. "Well, that was interesting," Ennis commented, looking at Jack; he was smiling widely at him.

"This is gonna work, isn't it?" he asked, looking as if he believed it. "They can't deny what the footage shows...and maybe..." He trailed off hopefully.

Ennis pulled him close. "And just maybe...this will work out for us," he replied, leaning in to kiss those lips he loved so much.

* * *

They decided that since they were already outside, they would go for lunch down the street. Both of them were hungry after that morning's events, and rightly so.

"Still can't believe it," Jack said as they looked over the menus. "To think that I've been freaking out all this time, and through all of it there was that footage out there to prove our defence. And it's just like Peter said; it's a question of why they stole the records."

"Yep," Ennis agreed. "They knew their accusations would be weak without proof, and that's still the case because the records don't even prove anything. The only reason it's going to court is because of how serious the accusation is; the police are only doing their job."

"Right. You know...I feel so much better now. I really do. We have something concrete to prove that they're just being malicious. The camera never lies, remember? You can't alter CCTV footage, I don't think." He exhaled, looking happy. "God..."

Ennis smiled at him; he was starting to resemble the old Jack again. "Darlin'...I'm glad this is making you feel better."

Jack took his hand across the table. "Thank you, for remembering about that camera. If you hadn't then we wouldn't have anything. This is all down to you." He smiled widely as he gazed into Ennis's eyes, love bursting in his heart. He knew how extremely lucky he was to have someone like Ennis by his side; he could appreciate that even more now.

"Um...hi," greeted the waitress, hating to interrupt them during their moment. "Sorry, guys. What can I get you?"

They placed their orders and went back to looking at each other, Jack playing with Ennis's fingers. Ennis was happy to see that Jack's smile met his eyes; it meant that he was truly in good spirits. "You know, um..." he started, finally turning his eyes away from Jack's. That intense shade of blue had often rendered him incapable of speech. "You oughta call your mom; let her know the good news."

"Yeah, you're right," Jack agreed. "And about the application too; she'll wanna know about that." Ennis nodded and Jack reluctantly withdrew his hand, reaching for his phone. He knew that his mother would only worry if he didn't call her at least once a week.

Ennis watched and listened as Jack spoke to his mother, a smile still firmly on his face. He often liked to just watch Jack, especially how those dimples formed when he smiled and how his eyes lit up. Ennis knew there and then that Jack's face was the last sight he wanted to lay his eyes on when he died. He had to believe that there was something more after death because he couldn't stand the thought of never seeing Jack again; they were supposed to be together forever and he wanted that.

But he just couldn't think like that right now; they were still young and relatively healthy, despite certain things. They took care of each other when they got ill and always kept an eye on each other to make sure there were no signs of nasty side effects from the meds. Jack had taught him how to recognise them soon after getting out of hospital two years ago, and had taught him how to recognise signs within himself if he should fall sick.

"So it looks like we might just win this," Jack said to his mother, grinning. "I know you've been worried about me, but Ennis is taking good care of me." Their food had arrived and Ennis was watching him as he ate.

"I'm glad to hear that, Jack," she replied, sounding happy. "When you were infected I never dared to hope that you would find someone who could be there for you like he is. But you have and I'm very grateful to him for that. I'm glad that you two are such a good match; I couldn't bear it if you broke up."

"Me neither, but I don't think we have to worry about that," he assured her. "We can barely spend a few hours apart while at work; there's no way we'll ever get tired of each other. And we never fight, at least not to the level that causes problems." It was true; they got a bit short with each other sometimes but that was usually caused by other factors and not each other. They always apologised soon after and made up; life was just too short to hold grudges.

"I'm glad to hear it. Well, I have to go. But make sure that you and Ennis take care of each other, okay? And let me know how everything goes. I might make it for dinner soon."

"That sounds great. Okay, we'll see you soon. Bye, mom." He hung up and smiled at Ennis. "I reckon she's pleased about everything."

Ennis nodded, chewing thoughtfully. "You know...I've been thinking. When all of this is over and you're free to go wherever you want, what d'you think about us taking a little trip somewhere?" He felt as if they would need it when this was over, just to take some time alone together.

Jack tilted his head. "That sounds great. But what if the adoption application goes through and we end up with a kid soon after? We can't just take off; not exactly responsible." Ennis smiled at him.

"I didn't say right away. If we have a baby by then...maybe we could go somewhere around Christmas. And if there's no sign of anything happening then we'll go sooner. Wherever you wanna go."

Jack smiled back, understanding. "Fair enough." He was starting to have faith now, and he felt okay about making plans for the future now that there was the possibility of one. "Have I told you today how much I love you?"

Ennis rubbed his foot against Jack's. "I think you did this morning, but...we can never say it too many times." Jack leaned forward to kiss him across the table, smiling against his lips.

* * *

_October 24th, 2012_

On Wednesday morning, Ennis and Jack had woken up early and were now kissing deeply, hands wandering underneath the sheets. It had been some time since they had been like this, but neither of them was complaining.

Ennis knew that Jack's current mood had a lot to do with the strong possibility of them winning the case, and he was very grateful to Peter for bringing it up; Jack was like his normal self now.

"Oh God," he breathed when Jack nipped his neck, half-lying on top of him. Jack grinned.

"My name's Jack, but I'm glad you think so highly of me," he replied, making Ennis laugh. He dipped his head to set about giving Ennis a hickey, hand wandering south. "You're so gorgeous," he whispered in Ennis's ear, eliciting a shiver from him.

"Jack..." he groaned, feeling himself grow even harder. He knew what he wanted and needed, but would Jack be up for it? "Jack, I..."

"What is it?" Jack asked him, pausing. Surely he was enjoying this? Ennis seemed nervous about what he wanted to say. "What's wrong?" He brushed his hair from his face as he looked down at Ennis; they were both hard by now and he was looking forward to where that might lead.

Ennis shook his head, taking Jack's hands. "Nothing's wrong. I just...I wanna..." He bit his lip.

"Tell me...what d'you want?" Jack asked, squeezing his fingers. He was feeling good this morning and was up for anything.

"I want you...inside me," Ennis murmured, and then looked away as if he expected Jack to refuse his request. Jack cupped his cheek.

"Hey...if that's what you want we can do that. Why are you...?"

Ennis shook his head and met Jack's eyes. "I dunno if you're up for it. I know you've been okay these past few days but...it might be too much."

Jack smiled at him affectionately. "Bud...you've got nothing to worry about. I know things haven't been easy, but you're right; I'm feeling good right now and...I wanna do it. You know I love doing that with you. It's not too much."

He leaned down to kiss his husband, touched by how Ennis was thinking of him first despite his own needs. "Aw, baby...it's okay. You wanna do it that way?"

"Yeah," Ennis breathed, arousal filling him once more. Jack reached over for the lube, and applied to himself as he nuzzled Ennis's neck. He hadn't really thought about being on top this morning, but now that Ennis had asked him he realised he wanted to. He just loved how Ennis trusted him so much.

When he was ready, he spread Ennis's legs apart and manoeuvred himself between them, getting into position. "Tell me when you're ready," he instructed softly, stroking Ennis's lower stomach in a way that was bound to get him riled up; he could get very sensitive there when he was hard.

"Oh..." Ennis groaned, tilting his head back. "God, you drive me crazy."

With Jack kissing his neck and touching him like that, Ennis was soon yearning for him and lifted his hips. Jack smirked at him.

"What d'you want?" he asked lightly, the tips of his fingers brushing against Ennis's erection. Ennis bucked underneath him, breathing heavily.

"Fuck me," he moaned, and Jack pushed in without preamble. One smooth stroke and he was fully inside his lover, drawing a groan from him.

"This what you want?" Jack asked, moving around until he was comfortable. Ennis nodded.

"Yeah...move..." He wrapped his legs around Jack's waist and held onto him by the neck; Jack braced his arms on either side of Ennis and started moving, keeping it slow at first. He knew it would drive Ennis crazy if he just barely touched the prostate, and he was right. When he brushed against it Ennis almost growled in frustration, lifting his hips. "Jack..."

Jack leaned down and bit his ear, moving steadily into him. "I'm fucking you, like you asked. If you want something, you'll have to beg," he breathed, and Ennis thought his head would split in two from the longing he felt.

"Touch it...in there..." he moaned. "You know what I'm talking about..."

Jack grinned and pushed in deeper, finally touching that particular place and loving the sounds now coming from Ennis's mouth. He lightly touched the tip of Ennis's erection, teasing little beads of pre-come from it and hearing a whimper.

"Jack...please..."

"Say it," Jack hissed in his ear, continuing to tease him. "Say it out loud."

"Jerk me off," Ennis groaned, wondering if he would completely lose it if Jack didn't touch him properly. Jack took hold of him and started doing as he was asked while still pushing deeper and quicker. It didn't take long for Ennis to lose control and shoot at Jack's stomach, yelling out as Jack found himself following suit.

Jack collapsed onto him, trying to catch his breath. "Oh, Ennis...sweetheart..." Ennis smiled at the endearment and winced slightly as Jack pulled out of him before sinking down again. "Oh, I love you..."

"I love you too," he replied, wrapping his arms around Jack. He knew he would be sore for a while but he couldn't care less. He had missed the feeling of Jack being inside him and felt much more complete now. "That was good..."

"Yeah," Jack agreed, pressing a soft kiss to his neck. "I love being with you, Ennis...no matter who's on top or whatever we're doing, even if it's not full sex. Like when we do that sixty-nine thing...I just love doing stuff with you."

Ennis squeezed him, love blazing in his heart. "Me too, Jack. We're just...a damn good match, I reckon. They say that sex gets worse as a couple gets older...but I reckon it's gonna be the opposite with us. We just get better every time."

Jack grinned, inhaling the musky smells that always lingered after sex. "You're right...we really do." He sighed and felt himself falling asleep. Ennis said nothing but just let him drop off; there was a while yet before they had to get up.


	18. Chapter 18

**Chapter 18**

_October 31st, 2012_

Halloween fell on a Wednesday this year; both Ennis and Jack had noticed how their work places had been decorated for the occasion. They had already exchanged tales of how they had spent the holidays as kids, running around town with their friends and knocking on doors for candy. They were too old to do that now but Jack had suggested they do a little trick-or-treating of their own at night.

Jack's good mood of the previous week was still going strong. The dark cloud that had been lingering over him lately seemed to have dissipated in the hope that they had a chance. Ennis had called Peter over the weekend to thank him for suggesting it and helping Jack snap out of his bleak mood. And the amazing sex of last week had also kept going; both of them felt a lot better now that their frustrations had been seen to, as it were.

Jack did still occasionally worry about the trial and how it might go, but he kept thinking over what people had told him. Ennis had vowed to stay true to him no matter what, and Peter had helped them find a concrete defence that nobody could argue with. Things were looking up and he was tired of feeling hopeless anyway; it was time to change and fight to keep himself out of jail. Ennis couldn't do all the work; he had to take control of this situation.

When they had been cooking dinner after work, Jack's mother had dropped by with a pumpkin pie for them. She couldn't stay, but they had thanked her and Jack had told Ennis about the wonderful pies she made. Ennis could see just how much he was looking forward to eating it. He was happy that Jack was still so close to his mother, and didn't feel any resentment that he couldn't have the same relationship with his own parents. This was their fault and he was starting to hate them for it. If they couldn't accept his choice to be with Jack then all he could do was try to protect what he and Jack had.

"This is something else," he mumbled around a mouthful of the pie. He'd had it before, but never like this. "Damn good."

"Sure is," Jack agreed, nodding. They had bowls of candy ready for any kids that might pop by; the front doors to the building were left open on this night for the kids and they wondered if one day they might be taking their own child around like that. The notion of it made both of them hope that it would happen soon; they both wanted to be parents.

When they were done, they settled themselves on the sofa with a bottle of wine to watch a scary movie marathon. Jack grabbed the afghan from the back and draped it over them, smiling up at Ennis as their eyes met. "Comfy?"

"Yep," Ennis replied, leaning down to kiss him softly. The bottle of wine was opened and they started watching the first movie, comfortable together. With the main lights off and just the lamps and the glow of the TV, it felt very intimate and romantic.

When there came a knock at the door about an hour later, Jack jumped and exhaled. "Damn, wasn't expecting that." He got up and grabbed a bowl of candy, opening the door to find a ghost and vampire looking up at him with identical green eyes; they were clearly the twins that lived on the first floor with their parents. "Well, don't you two look scary?" he said to them with a grin, putting some candy into their pumpkin-shaped bags. Ennis heard him and grinned, knowing that Jack would be a good father one day.

Jack closed the door and set the bowl back down, resuming his place next to Ennis and curling up. "Who was it? Anyone we know?" Ennis asked him. Jack nodded.

"Yep. Kirsty and Katie; those twins who live on the first floor. They were a ghost and vampire." Ennis nodded and squeezed him, hoping that they would have a kid soon. He wanted to raise a child with Jack; one that needed a loving home that they could provide.

"You're good with kids, Jack. You're gonna be a great dad." Jack smiled up at him.

"So will you." Ennis kissed the top of his head and they turned back to the movie.

Half an hour later, Ennis opened the door to a witch accompanied by a cowboy, smiling at the unusual sight. The first Halloween costume he could recall having was a cowboy, including a tan hat that he had kept until it would no longer fit. Jack had told him that his first costume had been a mummy, which had caused Karen a headache with all the bandages they'd needed for it.

As the evening wore on, a few more kids came to their door. One of Jack's clients from work had brought his niece, who was a ballerina, and they enjoyed talking for a few moments before he bid goodbye to them.

The bottle of wine was dwindling and Jack could tell that Ennis was becoming horny; red wine did that to him. He grinned and pretended not to notice that Ennis was nuzzling the back of his neck, or that a hand was wandering underneath the afghan and towards his crotch.

"You want something?" he asked when Ennis dipped his hand between his legs and squeezed. Ennis smirked and shrugged, continuing to fondle him. Jack bit back a moan as he tried to keep his face neutral.

"Maybe. You got a problem with that?"

"Hell no. I'll see you in our bed in two minutes," Jack replied before springing up and switching the TV off. He was aware of Ennis half-running to the bedroom as he locked up and made sure everything was safe to leave. Then he grinned to himself and followed his very eager husband.

* * *

Ennis was all over Jack as soon as he entered the bedroom, kissing him deeply and squeezing his ass. Jack moaned into his mouth at the contact; he was very happy that they were like this again.

"God, you drive me crazy," he breathed when Ennis broke away, now nibbling at his neck. Ennis grinned.

"Thought you already were."

"Bastard," Jack replied, his hands working at the buttons of Ennis's shirt. "Come here..." Ennis started doing the same to him, and soon they were both shirtless, admiring each other in the moonlight coming through the balcony doors.

"You're beautiful," Ennis whispered, cupping Jack's chin in his hands. "You know that, right?"

Jack smiled. "I'm not vain, Ennis. But you keep telling me things like that, so maybe...it's true. But you are too, you know." They kissed and ran their hands over each other, remembering every muscle and curve; they knew each other's bodies so well by now, just as well as their own.

Ennis started moving backwards to the bed, bringing Jack with him until they were sinking down onto it, growing harder as their hands continued to paw at each other. Jack hungrily plunged his tongue into Ennis's mouth, needing more.

With some difficulty owing to their unwillingness to part lips, they managed to get their jeans and underwear off, kicking everything to the floor. Jack found himself on his back with Ennis leaning over him, their fingers squeezing together. "Ennis," Jack breathed, feeling every little surge of pleasure like an electric shock. "Oh God..."

Ennis looked down at him, brown eyes almost black with desire; the sight made Jack shiver with anticipation. "What d'you want, darlin'?" he whispered, making Jack grin. The hand wandering down his stomach was distracting him.

"Want you inside me," he replied, lifting his hips. "Please?"

Ennis nodded and nuzzled his neck. "Which way?" he asked, and Jack considered for a moment. Sex on all fours didn't appeal to him right now, when he thought about what could happen to him in prison.

"From the front," he breathed, looking up into Ennis's eyes. "I wanna see you..." Ennis seemed to understand why he wanted it that way, and he nodded.

"Sure, bud. I'll take care of you." A lump grew in Jack's throat, the words catching him off-guard.

"You always do," he croaked, emotions building up inside him. Ennis kissed his cheek.

"Just relax, Jack...you know I won't hurt you." Jack nodded and watched as Ennis started preparing himself, knowing in his heart that Ennis wouldn't do anything that would make him uncomfortable or scared.

When he was ready, he saw Jack widen his legs. "Come on, Ennis...let's show them how it's done." That mischievous twinkle was in his eyes and Ennis knew what that meant. He got into position and started pushing in, watching his lover's face carefully for signs of too much pain. But they didn't come and soon he was fully inside, tugging Jack's legs around his waist and bracing himself on his knees.

"You ready?" he asked, looking forward to this; he always did. Jack nodded, feeling the wonderful pressure of having Ennis inside him. Ennis leaned down and started moving, sliding out a little before pushing back in. He knew that Jack loved it when the pace was slow, so they could appreciate every moment. It truly felt like making love.

"Oh..." Jack moaned, letting his head fall to the side and exposing his neck. Ennis couldn't help but press his lips to it, thinking of giving Jack a hickey. He knew that Jack didn't mind being branded, for he had often told Ennis how they belonged to each other. He would never think of Jack as property, but in some way Jack was his. "Ennis...feels good..."

"I'm glad," Ennis murmured to him, nibbling his ear. He continued to rock into Jack, hearing the delicious little moans coming from his mouth. He trailed a hand down to caress Jack's lower stomach, knowing that it would drive him crazy with need. Sure enough, Jack groaned loudly and lifted his hips even further.

"Oh God...Ennis...touch me, please!" he pleaded, and Ennis did as he was asked; he took a firm hold of Jack and started jerking him off in time to his thrusts, still nipping at Jack's neck. When he felt himself coming and knew that Jack wasn't far behind, he planted his lips on Jack's just as their orgasms ripped through them. Ennis gritted his teeth until it was over, and then sank down onto Jack's heaving chest. "Oh, darlin'..."

Jack sighed in contentment and wrapped his arms around Ennis, wincing slightly as he pulled out. "Happy Halloween, baby."

"Same to you..." They were silent for a moment as they got their breath back, and Jack started thinking as he looked up at the ceiling. He ran his hand up and down Ennis's back as he thought, hearing Ennis sigh in approval. He cleared his throat.

"Ennis?"

"Hmm?"

"This kid we're gonna adopt...you think it's already been born?"

"Dunno, why?"

"I was thinking...we believe in fate, right? Maybe...it hasn't been born yet. Maybe it's waiting for us to be approved. I know that sounds really crazy, but..."

Ennis lifted his head, looking at Jack curiously. "It's not crazy. But I've never thought about it that way before. You might be right there." It was a strange notion, but one that appealed to him very much.

Jack smiled at him. "Hmm..." Ennis shuffled forward so that they could kiss, feeling Jack smiling against his lips. Then he crawled off Jack and lay on his own side of the bed, stretching. Jack curled up against him like a cat, warm and sated. Ennis smiled and put an arm around him, nuzzling Jack's hair and hearing him purr in response. "Night, Ennis..."

"Night, darlin'." Jack hadn't had any nightmares since his birthday, so Ennis was confident that he would be okay. Still, he held onto Jack tightly through the night to reassure him that he was there.

* * *

_November 3rd, 2012_

On Saturday, Ennis and Jack were due for another meeting with Peter to go over their defence. There was less than two weeks until the trial but Jack seemed to be coping better now that they had something to work with. The photos from the footage could be used as evidence in their favour and that was giving them hope that they would win.

Ennis had been tempted to call his parents and taunt them over what he and Jack had against them, but he was smart enough to know it wouldn't be a very good idea; he didn't want it to backfire on them. They had to be extremely careful if they wanted to win this; they couldn't risk anything.

They strolled down the street hand in hand, Ennis swinging their clasped fingers now and then. He was happy that Jack was doing so much better now, and he had assured Karen over the phone that Jack was fine. This was far from over yet, but Ennis knew that if Jack felt better about everything, he would be in the right state of mind to defend himself in court; that was very important.

"So, I had a thought," Ennis started as they turned a corner. Jack looked at him. "I was wondering if you wanted to go on a date tonight." They hadn't been out for a while and Jack seemed like he would be up for it; he was doing so much better.

Jack grinned at him. "You asking me out?" he teased, nudging Ennis's shoulder. He shrugged, cheeks colouring slightly.

"Yep. Maybe that restaurant where we went before, the River Café. Remember?"

"That really romantic place?" Jack asked, eyes lighting up. "That sounds great, Ennis. I'd love to." He kissed Ennis's cheek, feeling pleased at the offer. Even though they were married and settled down, he was glad to know that the flame between them hadn't died down at all. Also, he knew that going on dates was just one of the many things they enjoyed doing together. Ennis smiled when Jack kissed him, his cheek tingling pleasantly at the contact.

They made their way to Peter's office and were soon shown in, shaking his hand in turn before sitting down. "So, how are you two faring?" he asked them. Jack nodded.

"We're okay, I reckon," he replied. "Now that we've got something we can use."

"I have to say, Jack...you do look a lot better now. I guess you needed that kind of reassurance."

"Yeah, it helped," he agreed, smiling. "So...what are we doing today again?"

Peter cleared his throat. "Well, I thought it would be a good idea if we went over your defence. I can also give you a rundown of how the trial would proceed." They leaned forward eagerly.

"So...?"

"Well, both of you will be called to the stand to state your defence, which you already know. On your behalf, I would plead not guilty. Now, Ennis's parents will probably be trying their best to claim that Jack is guilty, so just be prepared for some dirty looks from them. Now, they will likely be declaring the medical record as their evidence, which is so weak it's laughable," he added, smirking at them. "I'd say you two have a much stronger argument, especially when we bring up how the records were stolen."

Ennis nodded. "Can't wait to see their faces," he replied, making Jack grin.

"Me neither, to be honest. Now, you are allowed to call witnesses, if you should wish. As with the adoption letter, you should choose someone who knows you well; who can vouch for the fact that the infection was accidental. They would tell the jury about your relationship and how unlikely it is that you would infect Ennis without his consent."

"Okay. Could my mom do that?" Jack asked. "She knows us well enough."

"True, I don't see why not. And if your friend Lureen is over here during the time of the trial, perhaps she could stand up for you too."

"Sounds good to me," Jack replied. "I'll ask her later. So we give our statements, show the images from that footage and hope for the best?"

"Pretty much, but you should focus on what you're going to say. Practice it together so that you get it right. That will certainly help, as you are bound to be nervous on the day. I would highly recommend that you try and relax as much as possible before the date, alright? You got any plans?"

Jack smiled. "We're going on a date tonight," he replied. Peter nodded.

"Good, try and keep things normal as much as you can. Just try not to worry, okay?"

They nodded and talked a little more before deciding to leave. Once back out in the sunshine, Jack turned to Ennis; it was just after twelve and he was starting to get hungry.

"So...what time are we going out for dinner? I was thinking we could get a little lunch while we're here."

Ennis nodded. "Sure. I think we could book a table for six, if you want." He thought for a moment. "There's something I wanna do first, though."

"What's that?"

"I wanna call my parents. I'm not gonna tell them," he added when Jack opened his mouth. "I'll just let them know that we're fighting this with everything we have. I want them to know that I'm not backing down." He had already decided on one thing; when the trial was over and Jack was safe, he would be rejecting his parents for good. He didn't even feel any hurt at the prospect; they had done this by threatening his relationship.

Jack nodded, seeing the logic in this. "Fair enough. Tell you what...you do that and I'll call my mom to ask her to make a statement at the trial. Let's go for a walk and grab some lunch in the park." Ennis agreed and they headed off, once more clasping hands between them.

* * *

The pair of them walked slowly through the park until they reached a bench and sat down. Ennis took his phone out and looked at Jack, who nodded to him. "When you're ready," he said softly, taking Ennis's hand to offer him support.

Ennis dialled his parents' home number and waited, wondering what they were going to say this time. He wouldn't tell them about the leverage he and Jack had over them, despite how tempting it was. He didn't want to put Jack at any more risk than he already was.

"Hello?" asked his mother. He took a deep breath, hoping to get through this.

"Mom, it's me."

"Oh...right. What's this about?"

"Just wanted to tell you a couple of things. You know that Jack's been really worried about the trial, and I was sure he'd have a breakdown," he admitted. Jack lowered his eyes; Ennis hadn't told him about that fear. "But he's doing a lot better now, and he's coping."

"Okay," she replied, and he could swear that she sounded disappointed; this did nothing to improve his mood towards her. She was trying his patience and he no longer cared about cutting them off.

"And...I just wanted to let you know something else. I'm not backing down over this. It's not easy for either of us, but we're gonna fight you every step of the way. I love Jack, with all my heart, and I'm not gonna let you take him away from me," he said firmly, squeezing Jack's hand. Jack smiled at him. "So you can do whatever you like...I'm not letting him go without a fight." He hung up before she could reply, breathing deeply. "She doesn't seem too happy about you feeling better."

Jack shrugged and kissed his cheek. "It's okay, Ennis. I kind of expected that, to be honest." He thought for a moment. "Um...you said to her that you thought I was gonna have a breakdown. You never told me that..."

Ennis looked at him sadly. "I didn't wanna say anything. Thought that you were dealing with enough, to be honest. Sorry..."

"It's okay. I'm glad I didn't, anyway. Would have made things so much worse." He thought for a moment. "You know...Peter's been so great to us, and it's because of him that we've got a good chance of winning this trial. So I was thinking...maybe we could have him over for dinner one evening. As a thank you." Ennis nodded.

"Yeah, that sounds good." He put his arm around Jack comfortably, and Jack settled against him. "You're right; he's been good to us. Are you gonna talk to your mom about speaking for us?"

"In a while," Jack replied, nuzzling his neck. "Just want some time with you first..." Ennis looked down into his eyes, smiling at how they were reflecting the sun. They really were something else, and he recalled how they had been the first things he'd noticed about Jack. Even now, they took his breath away, especially when he was looking down into them when they were in bed.

He leaned in to kiss those soft lips, feeling Jack breathe into his mouth at the contact. He did always love kissing Jack; it was a feeling that he would never grow tired of.

After a while, they broke apart and smiled at each other, nuzzling noses. "Well, um..." Jack started, now sounding flustered. "You wanna get some lunch?"

"Yeah, sure." They got up with their hands clasped together, and headed for the café where they usually ate while here. It was fairly busy, but not too much.

When they walked in, they were just about to head for an empty table when they heard a familiar voice. "Ennis! Jack!" It was Karen, sat in a corner and waving at them. They headed over to her, smiling.

"Hey, Mom," Jack said to her, bending to kiss her cheek. Ennis did the same and they sat with her. "What are you doing here?"

"I just felt like having a shopping trip, and you two are always telling me about this place so I figured I'd try it. What are you up to?"

"We've just had a meeting with Peter," Jack informed her. "Just to go over our defence and everything." She nodded.

"Good. I'm guessing he's got the images from that footage?" They nodded. "Well, I'm glad to see you're doing better, Jack. I was worried about you." He took her hand.

"I'm fine, really. Ennis is taking good care of me." A waitress came over to take their orders and they decided to split a tuna melt; they had always liked sharing food for some reason.

"I'm glad to hear it," she replied, smiling at them both. As they waited for their food, they ended up talking about asking Lureen to stand up for them if she was in the area at the time.

"I think it's a good idea," Karen agreed. "She knows you well and can confirm that it's highly unlikely you would infect Ennis without his consent. Because that's what this is about. If it had been intentional, then Ennis...you would have agreed, right?"

Ennis nodded. "Yeah. I'd be lying if I said that I hadn't thought about it...about asking him to do it. Sometimes I figured it'd make things easier for us. But I'm glad I didn't...it might have made things worse." Jack nodded in agreement; he too was very glad that Ennis hadn't asked him. He didn't want to make that kind of decision where Ennis was concerned.

When they were finished, they bid goodbye to Karen and went their separate way, strolling along a random path that they knew would lead them to a lake.

Once there, they sat down on the grass and watched people as they walked by. Despite the month, it was still relatively warm and they wanted to make the most of it. They were looking forward to their date tonight, and what the night would bring when they got home afterwards.

* * *

That evening, Ennis and Jack were preparing for their date at the restaurant; it had been a while since they'd been out together and they were looking forward to it.

Jack walked into the bedroom and was left speechless as he caught sight of Ennis; he was wearing a deep red shirt that showed his muscles very nicely. "Um..."

Ennis smirked at him. "Well, it's a special night. Wanted to make the effort for you." He walked up to Jack, kissing him softly. "You look damn good, darlin'," he observed, taking in the crisp white shirt he was wearing. "Can't wait to get that off you later..."

"You sweet-talker," Jack replied, grinning when Ennis nuzzled his neck. "Come on, or we're just gonna end up in bed all night." Ennis sighed and let him go, admiring the view when Jack turned around. "And quit looking at my ass, Del Mar. We'll have time for that later." He led Ennis into the main room, gathering his keys and wallet. Ennis took the latter from him.

"I'm paying tonight, my treat," he said to Jack, smiling at him. Jack tilted his head.

"Ennis...you don't have to do that," he replied, feeling slightly pleased nevertheless. Ennis shook his head.

"I want to. Come on, bud." Jack decided not to argue, but simply followed Ennis out of the door and locked up behind them. They clasped hands and headed out of the building together, looking forward to a romantic evening. They always had enjoyed doing this.

They reached the restaurant and were shown to their table, glad that they had booked ahead. Once more, they were seated by the large windows that had a beautiful view of the water and Manhattan. Jack had loved coming here a few months ago, and he hoped that they would do so again in the future.

"You know...there was a time when I didn't understand why married couples went on dates," Ennis admitted as they looked over the menus. "I mean, they were already committed to each other and I didn't get why they felt they had to impress each other."

"But you get it now?" Jack asked with a knowing smile.

"I sure do. I like it when we make the effort for each other, Jack. It helps to know that we're still interested in each other so much. I like that," he replied, smiling back. Jack's eyes were sparkling at him in the candlelight and he looked away, as if he would get distracted by looking into them.

They ordered their food and listened to the live music as they waited; they were bound to dance a little later after they had eaten. They were glad to know that this place was so accepting; it had turned out that one of the co-owners was gay so that soon explained everything.

"This is a great place," Jack said, looking around. Ennis was playing with his fingers on the table, sending tiny waves of pleasure through him. This looked set to be a perfect evening. "I mean, look at this view..."

Ennis watched as Jack admired the view, seeing how happy he was. "Sure is beautiful," he agreed; Jack knew he wasn't looking in the same direction but said nothing. "I love you, Jack."

Jack turned to smile at him, squeezing his fingers gently. "Same to you, bud. Where'd that come from?"

"Just wanted to say it. I mean...I really do. I'm so...in love with you and...I hope you know just how much," he replied, hoping that Jack really did know. "I'd do anything for you...and anything to protect you." He gulped, trying to keep his emotions in check. "You know?"

Jack looked into his eyes. "I do, Ennis...I really do. You know how? Because I feel exactly the same. I understand how you feel because I feel it too. I swear, Ennis...you make me really happy." They gazed at each other for a few minutes, taking each other in and completely oblivious to everybody around them. Both had been in relationships before meeting, but they hadn't been a patch on this; they had found the one person that they were meant to be with, and they wanted to keep this going. They just couldn't let Ennis's parents have their way.

The waitress had to clear her throat to get their attention, smiling when they blushed at being caught. The food was just as delicious as they'd remembered it, and they ended up feeding each other with grins on their faces. Nobody paid them any attention, which they appreciated. They were proud of what they had but didn't want an audience when they were showing their love for one another.

They ate dinner and Ennis was going to order dessert but Jack murmured in his ear that they could have that at home, so he decided not to. After dancing in the corner to the live band for a while, they decided to head back home; Jack knew that Ennis had been drinking red wine and he knew what that did to him.

Sure enough, Jack soon found himself pressed against a brick wall in an alleyway, Ennis nibbling his exposed neck and grinding against him. They had had sex in public like this before, in similar places, but Jack really wanted to get into their bed for this. But what Ennis was doing to him felt so good and he seriously contemplated letting it happen here.

"Ennis..." he groaned, thrusting his hips helplessly. "Wanna get to bed for this..." He was hard and just wanted Ennis to take him right here, but it wouldn't be a good idea.

"Me too, but...I can't help it. You know you turn me on, Jack..." He managed to pull his lips away and took a deep breath. "You're right...we don't wanna be seen doing this. It's illegal, for one thing...and we don't need that right now." He grabbed Jack's hand and pulled him out of the alleyway, making a beeline for their apartment.


	19. Chapter 19

**Chapter 19**

_November 5th, 2012_

During their lunch break on Monday, Ennis and Jack were walking through the park again. The weather was starting to turn colder now and winter was almost upon them; they were looking forward to the snow and curling up in front of the fire together. It tended to be very romantic and they might also have a baby by then; Christmas was bound to be fun.

At Peter's recommendation, they had been practicing their defence for the trial. Not just by themselves, but also with him. He had noticed that they no longer referred to it as Jack's defence, but as theirs. That said a lot as far as he was concerned; they were completely in it together.

They hadn't heard anything from the adoption agency since the last phone call, but that was about to change. As they kissed on the bench while taking a break, Ennis felt his cell phone buzzing in his pocket. "Mmmph," he protested, unwilling to break away from his husband. He had never said anything, but he secretly hated it when something disrupted his time with Jack. But he also knew that this would never happen with a baby in the apartment; that would be completely different. They would be creating a family together and that was a very special thing.

Jack prised his lips away, grinning. "You'd better answer that, bud," he said, and Ennis reluctantly pulled it out of his pocket. "We'll pick up where we left off in a minute."

"I'll hold you to that," Ennis replied, smirking back at him. "Hello?" he asked, pressing the phone to his ear.

"Is this Ennis Del Mar?" asked a familiar female voice. He knew he'd heard it somewhere before.

"It is, yeah..."

"I'm Claire Simmons, from the adoption agency? We spoke a couple of weeks ago and I informed you that your adoption application was being processed."

"Right, yeah," he replied, recognising her voice now. "So, um...how can I help you?"

"Well, I'm very pleased to tell you that your application has been approved, for the most part. Now I just have to assess your living space and meet you."

"Okay, great," he said, smiling at Jack who looked puzzled. "So when do you want to come and see us?"

"Would this weekend be alright? Perhaps Saturday?"

"I think that'd be fine," he replied, but with a twinge he remembered that by then, there would be just four days until the trial. They would just have to get through it. "We'll be in all day."

"Alright. I'll see you and your husband then, and good luck to you both in advance. Bye." She clicked off and Ennis pulled the phone from his ear, staring at it in wonder.

"Ennis?" asked Jack, peering at him. "What was that about? Who's coming to see us?"

"That adoption worker I spoke to before," Ennis told him. "Our application's been mostly approved and now she just wants to see our apartment." Jack's face split into a grin.

"Oh, baby..." He hugged Ennis tightly, hardly daring to believe their good luck with everything else that was going on. "That's great! So when's she coming?"

"Saturday," Ennis replied, kissing his cheek. "I said we'd be in all day." Jack nodded but then his grin faded a little; Ennis knew what he was thinking. "I know, bud. Just four days until the trial from then. But we're gonna be fine," he assured Jack, grasping his hands. "It's all gonna work out, I'm sure."

Jack nodded, trying to remain strong and calm. "You're right...we're in a better position now than we were before...got a good defence. So...I guess we should think about tidying the place up a bit this week," he suggested. "We wanna make a good impression, right?"

"Yeah, you're right." Ennis put his phone back into his pocket and smiled at Jack. "Now then...where were we?" He pulled Jack close and started kissing him again, loving the warm weight pressed against him. It was true that they wanted to make a good impression for when she arrived, and were already thinking about what they could do about this; their apartment wasn't untidy, but still.

After a while, they got up and headed back to the café to get some lunch, excitedly talking about the visit from the adoption worker and what they were going to do. Depending on what time she came by, they might be able to make her something to eat; that might get them in her good books.

"I should call my mom," Jack mused as they ate. "She'll want to know about this, I reckon."

"Yeah, sure." Karen had already agreed to make a statement for them at the trial, and now that it was drawing close they both wanted to keep her close to them. "Sure am glad that things are coming together for us now," he added, thinking. "There was a while when I thought that maybe it wouldn't, you know?"

Jack nodded. "I know...me too. But it's coming together, like you said." He smiled. "I wonder if we'll get a boy or girl? What do you think?"

"Dunno. I know we don't really care, but it would help to have some idea. Would help with decorating and everything." Jack made a sound of agreement and they kept eating, his foot slowly rubbing against Ennis's in comfort.

When they were finished, they headed back towards one of the entrances to go back to work. They didn't like going their separate ways but they were looking forward to meeting up later so that they could return home.

"So...I guess I'll see you later," Jack said, leaning in towards Ennis and smiling. Ennis nodded, arms still around him.

"Yep...bye, darlin'." Ennis kissed him deeply and inhaled his scent before letting him go, walking backwards and smiling at his husband.

"Later," Jack whispered as he turned away, feeling as if part of his heart had been left behind but knowing he would get it back later.

* * *

They missed each other while at work, but soon enough it was time to go home and spend the evening and night together. This was always a good time for both of them, not least because of what they would be doing later but mostly because they would be together.

While they were cooking dinner that evening, Ennis turned to Jack. "I was thinking...you know what I'd like to do tonight?" Jack grinned wickedly at him, eyes sparkling. "Not that, you horny little..." He sighed, rolling his eyes; sometimes Jack had a one track mind, but he didn't really care. "I mean before that."

"What?" Jack asked, trying to keep a straight face. Ennis nudged him, knowing that he would like this suggestion.

"Well...I was thinking we'd have a bath together. You know?" They hadn't done that for such a long time and it was always fun. Now that they could have unprotected sex, it was another option for them. They had found that they could do more now, so it was both a blessing and a curse for them. Both of them had made their peace about it.

Jack smiled at him. "That sounds good to me, bud. I'd like that. You know I like seeing you naked and wet." The image did appeal to him, as it was one he'd seen many times.

"Yeah, I got that." They finished cooking and settled down to eat, talking about the adoption worker's visit. Both of them were looking forward to it and they hoped that it would go well; they really did want to be parents. They felt as if they deserved some normality after everything they had been through; maybe now was their chance.

They washed up together and then Jack turned to his husband, sliding his hands down to Ennis's ass and giving it a good squeeze. "So...you wanna take a bath with me? Hmm?"

"Yep," Ennis replied, smirking when Jack kissed his neck. He could feel arousal starting to stir within him; that familiar warmth in his stomach that he always associated with Jack. "You start running the bath, and I'll lock up."

"Okay," Jack answered, springing away from him and practically skipping towards the bathroom. Ennis laughed to himself before starting to lock up, looking forward to an evening with Jack. This was one thing that could help him relax after a day of work and everything else they got up to.

When he reached the bathroom, he saw that Jack was running the bath and was taking off his shirt. "Hey, hang on," he said, moving closer. "I'll do that." Jack smiled as Ennis removed his shirt, seeing the look of reverence in his eyes when the skin was exposed. "That's better," Ennis murmured when it was off. He guided Jack's hands to his own shirt and smiled when Jack undressed him, nodding in approval. He loved having Jack's hands on him.

By the time they were naked and kissing there in the bathroom, the bath was filling up and they were ready. "Shall we?" said Jack, and they managed to manoeuvre themselves into it, with Ennis to the back. As much as he loved it when Jack held him, sometimes he wanted to be the one in control; he wanted to feel Jack in his arms and know that he was happy and comfortable.

Ennis slid his arms around Jack once they were in, sighing with contentment. "This is nice," he said, hearing Jack purr when he kissed his cheek. He liked that sound; it assured him of Jack's happiness, which was always a good thing.

"Sure is. Good idea, bud. You wanna talk about Saturday?"

"Okay. What do you wanna do while we're waiting for her?"

"Apart from cleaning? I think there's a game on...which ones are the football team?"

"The Giants. I know, I keep mixing them up too. We can do that, if you want. And when we're cleaning up, make sure to hide the lube in the medicine cabinet. She sounds nice enough, but that's private."

"Yeah." Jack smiled when Ennis squeezed him, just enjoying the silence around them. "Mmm..."

"I love you," Ennis murmured, kissing the back of his neck and then his jaw. "Love you so much...and I can't wait for us to be a family."

"Me neither," Jack sighed. "I have to admit...when I realised I was gay I was just a teenager. It was 1998, so I was...fifteen. You'll remember that back then it was still hard for guys like us. Same-sex marriage wasn't even legal anywhere in the country until 2004. I never thought I'd end up marrying someone I really loved, let alone have a family with them." He thought for a moment. "Then I got infected, and even though things were better by then I had new reasons for thinking that."

Ennis nodded. "I know, darlin'. Pains me to think of how alone you were back then...how much you were suffering. I was with Alma then and I had no idea that all of this was gonna happen. I guess I always knew I was gay on some level, but I didn't wanna admit it because I thought it'd upset my parents." He shrugged. "If I'd known what they were capable of I wouldn't have minded so much."

"Guess not. I sure as hell didn't see this coming when we first talked about going to see them, years ago when we got together. Maybe I might have stayed at home..."

"Don't say that, Jack. I needed you there. But for what it's worth, I'm sorry I subjected you to that. You didn't need it."

"Ennis...we can keep going over this as much as we want. But...it won't do us any good. We ought to know that by now."

"Yeah..." They fell silent for a while and then decided to get out. "Ready for round two?" Ennis asked as they towelled off. Jack grinned at him.

"You bet," he replied, taking Ennis's hand and leading him to bed.

* * *

On Wednesday, Ennis and Jack were due to meet Karen for lunch in the city. They wanted to go through with her what she needed to say while speaking in their defence at the trial, and just to let her know how grateful they were. Jack was sure that if his father was alive, then he too would want to help wherever he could; they had made their peace and his father had even apologised for the things he had said.

Jack knew how easy it would be to resent Ennis, who had two living parents. But then he thought about what they were trying to do and knew that Ennis didn't like having them in his life like this. Ennis clearly didn't want things to play out in this way. They didn't talk about this, for they hated arguing and knew it wouldn't do any good. But it was always there.

He pushed it to the back of his mind as he felt Ennis squeeze his hand. "You alright?" They were walking down the street to the café where they were going to meet Karen. Jack nodded.

"Yeah. Thinking about my dad..." Ennis sighed.

"Jack...you know he'd support you if he was here," he said gently. "You made up, and you never thought you would, remember? When he died, he didn't hate who you are or what you've got. He said he was sorry for what he said."

"I know, and...it hurts to know that we got so little time. That it took him dying to bring us together again."

Ennis put an arm around him. "I know, darlin'. But what you've gotta remember is the times you had before he died. All those games we went to with him, the barbeques...it was fun, right?"

"It sure was. Never seen him so...relaxed. He wasn't just my dad then...he was my friend too. I've heard that tends to happen when kids get older...they become friends with their parents. I'm always gonna wish that we had more time, but you're right. I should hold on to what we've had."

He smiled when Ennis kissed his cheek and they soon reached the café. When they walked inside, they spotted Karen already waiting for them in their usual corner. "Hey, you two," she greeted them, and they sat down with her. "How was work this morning?"

"Um...I was mostly giving shots today," Ennis replied. "But there was an incident with a cat that scratched everybody who went near it. Wasn't too bad, though." He loved working with animals and wondered if they might have a dog or cat someday; that would be good.

"Just giving talks," Jack added. "I think it helps me to talk about what's going on for me. Especially since we've got that adoption worker coming to see us; it helps them to know that people with HIV can still have a good life."

Karen nodded. "It's true; you guys are living proof of that, and I'm very proud of you both for it." A waitress came over to take their orders and she added, "So, you wanted to go over what I'm going to say at the trial?"

"If you don't mind," Jack said, looking at her hopefully. "Basically, we want to prove that it was an accident. We all know that it was, but the jury don't know that for sure. We have to convince them of why it could only have been an accident."

"You said that Peter thinks your best bet is circumstantial evidence, right? To consider your relationship and why it makes no sense that you would infect Ennis without his consent."

"Right. The only way that could have happened is if...I forced him into it," Jack replied, wincing at the very thought. Ennis took his hand, squeezing his fingers. He knew how that was still a touchy subject for Jack; one that he would never be able to completely overcome. "So that proves what we're trying to say; I would never do that."

"And if the infection was on purpose, then I would have consented to it," Ennis added. "Which shows that the accusation of attempted murder is completely false."

"Okay, I follow you," Karen replied, nodding as she thought it over. "So I just have to talk about your relationship?"

"Pretty much, and why it doesn't make sense that I'd do it on purpose." Jack hesitated. "The way I got infected...we'll have to bring that up to support our defence; it shows how unlikely it is that I'd do the same thing. You could talk about how it affected me to become positive, and how miserable I was before meeting Ennis. All of this points towards the fact that I would never do what I'm being accused of."

"That makes sense. I'm glad that Peter's been helping you so much," Karen said as their food arrived. "I know it's not just because it's his job; he does like you two and he's always been a friend of the family."

"There's something I don't get," Ennis said, thinking. "How come there's been nothing in the press about this? You would think there would be, considering what the charges are."

"I don't know...I would expect your parents to do something, to humiliate Jack if nothing else. But I haven't seen anything." She had expected it, so had been keeping a close eye on the press just in case.

"Lureen would have called us if anything came up in the papers over there," Jack mused. "But we should be glad that there's nothing...that's the last thing we need right now, when we're also trying to adopt. Things are hard enough as it is."

"Absolutely. Maybe Ennis's parents know how weak their claim is; they're desperate. And if you can prove that..." Karen trailed off, giving them a knowing smile. Jack grinned back at her; he didn't have his father here to support him, but she was doing everything she could to help and he would never forget that.

* * *

That afternoon, Jack was dozing on the sofa while Ennis cooked dinner. Ennis kept glancing at him every now and then, partially to admire him and also to make sure that he was okay. He hadn't had a nightmare since his birthday, but Ennis was very aware of how it could just spring up.

He had to admit that he had been scared for Jack's mental health until recently, hoping that the trial wasn't scaring him so badly that he had a breakdown. The idea of going to prison and all its connotations terrified Jack, but it also scared Ennis to think of his beloved Jack going through that again. He'd promised himself that if Jack was locked up, he would fight tirelessly to have him released as soon as possible; he simply wouldn't rest until Jack was safe with him.

He smiled when he saw Jack turn over in his sleep, curling up like a cat. Jack represented home and all familiar things that he loved; he couldn't live without this man and would never want to. It wouldn't just destroy Jack if he was found guilty; Ennis knew it would break his heart to lose him, even for just a short while.

With the dinner cooking in the oven, Ennis made his way over to one of the armchairs; they weren't used often but he didn't want to disturb Jack right now. He was content to just watch Jack sleep, seeing the peaceful look on his face and knowing that he was happy.

Unbeknownst to him, Jack was at the onset of a nightmare.

_He was in the communal showers, praying that he would finish before anyone else walked in. Most of the other inmates weren't interested anyway, but he was scared of everybody right now. Daniel Waters hadn't tried anything yet but Jack knew it was coming._

_He froze when he heard voices, and felt his heart rate go up when he recognised one of them._

"_Well, what have we got here?" asked Daniel, and Jack turned to see a horrible grin on his face. "Must be my lucky day."_

"_Piss off," Jack growled, trying to act brave but knowing he wasn't; that man simply scared him too much._

"_Not a chance, Twist," Daniel replied, moving closer._

Ennis heard a whimper coming from the sofa and saw that Jack looked agitated. _Oh no..._

He got up and crouched down by Jack, starting to gently shake him; it wouldn't do Jack any good to stay in a nightmare.

_Jack turned back around to turn the shower off and felt a pair of horribly familiar hands on him. He felt himself being pushed to the ground, on his stomach. "Get off me!"_

"_Don't think so," Daniel replied, and before Jack could do anything his legs were being forced_ _apart. _

"_Please, no!" he cried out, trying to get free. "Please, not again!" But his attacker didn't listen, and the pain took over._

"No!" he yelled out, sitting bolt upright. Ennis jumped and sat on the sofa next to him.

"Jack?" he asked cautiously, knowing not to touch him just yet. Jack's eyes were closed and he was breathing deeply. "Jack, talk to me..."

"Oh God," he breathed, shaking all over. "Oh my God..."

"Jack?" asked Ennis in his most soothing voice. "Darlin'..."

Jack looked over his shoulder, blue eyes full of tears threatening to spill. "Ennis..." He threw himself into Ennis's arms, sobbing into his shoulder. "Oh God..."

"What happened?" Ennis asked him, rubbing his back and rocking him slightly. "Come on, tell me..."

"I...I was in prison, in the shower. Daniel Waters came in, and he had this grin on his face. He pushed me to the floor, and..."

"Did he...do it?" Ennis asked, trying to push the mental image away. Jack nodded.

"He started to...and then I woke up. Oh God, I could feel it...like the first time..." He was shaking so much that it concerned Ennis, and he just kept holding Jack. The dinner wouldn't be ready for a while so he could sit here until Jack calmed down.

"Jack, shh...it's okay. I know it seemed real, but it wasn't. I'm right here and I won't let him hurt you."

"Ennis...I was so scared. What if it does happen? When I get out, what if I can't let you near me? What if I'm too scared to have sex with you again? It's gonna break us up."

"Oh, darlin'..." Ennis sighed, still rocking him. "Come on, shh...it's over now."

After a while, Jack pulled away just enough to look at Ennis. "I...I..."

"I know," Ennis replied, cupping his cheeks. "It's okay, Jack. I'm here." Jack nodded, trying to take deep breaths.

"Yeah...it wasn't real but it felt like it. Oh God..." He opened his eyes. "Ennis...that scared me so much. Could you...kiss me? I feel like I need that..."

Ennis leaned in and did as he was asked, softly pressing his lips to Jack's. He felt Jack tremble slightly but that soon passed, and Jack was kissing him back by the time they parted. "How was that?"

Jack nodded and managed a small smile. "Good. Thanks, Ennis. I love you..."

"I love you too, Jack. So much...and I hate knowing what this is doing to you." He shook his head. "I never thought I could hate my parents, but...it's moments like this when I do."

Jack sniffed. "Me too." He took a deep breath, and Ennis was relieved to see that he was recovering so quickly. At least he would be okay. "Is dinner gonna be ready soon?"

"About half an hour," Ennis told him, brushing hair away from his forehead. "Why?"

"Can you...lie here with me for a while? Please?" he asked, need in his eyes. Ennis nodded and they lay down together, him holding Jack from behind and rubbing his stomach.

"It's alright, darlin'...I'm here..." Jack didn't fall asleep again, but he just enjoyed having Ennis with him and offering support. This was what he needed right now and he was happy to have it.

* * *

_November 9th, 2012_

On Friday, Ennis was making the most of his afternoon off. Jack was working so he had taken it upon himself to clean the apartment up for the visit the next day. Both he and Jack were very nervous but he was sure that it would all work out. All they had to do was present themselves normally, as good men who would make good parents. He knew that the adoption worker was already aware of their HIV status, but he had to hope that this wouldn't hold them back.

As he worked, he thought about Jack's nightmare the other day. To see him so scared had deeply affected Ennis; he'd just wanted to take the pain away so that Jack wouldn't have to suffer. They had to win this court case, for Jack's wellbeing if nothing else. Why couldn't his parents understand what they were doing? They claimed they were doing it for him but Ennis didn't see their logic, if there was any. They seemed determined to ruin his life and he would never forgive them for this; they would end up being estranged and that was fine with him.

He sighed to himself, half-listening to the radio as he worked. All he'd ever wanted was to be happy, but his parents wouldn't even let him have that. Why couldn't they just accept his choice to be with Jack?

He heard his phone ringing and picked it up; he hadn't expected the name that was currently flashing on the screen. "Alma?"

"Hey, Ennis," came the familiar voice; he hadn't spoken to her for a long time. "Guess it's been a while."

"Yeah," he agreed, sitting down. "Um...what's up?"

"Lureen told me what's going on with Jack. I wished you'd told me, you know."

"Well..." He shifted uncomfortably. "You know how it is. I didn't want to..."

"Hurt my feelings?" she replied. "Ennis...we broke up before you even met Jack, before he even came over here. You'd realised that you're gay and we parted as friendly as we could. Yeah, it was weird at first to see you with him. But I got over it because I wanted you to be happy."

He sighed. "You're right; I should have told you. You're our friend, despite what's happened. I'm sorry..."

"It's alright. So, this court case. Lureen tells me you've got a good defence?"

"Yeah. Found some CCTV footage that proves my dad stole the medical records. Now we think that if we show them as evidence, it'll cast doubts on what my parents are saying about Jack."

"That sounds like it'll work. Do you want me to talk to them? Maybe try and get them to realise what they're doing? Lureen told me that Jack's been taking it very hard."

"He has, but you don't need to do that. I appreciate it, but we don't want anything to happen that'll goad my parents into doing something else. They don't need provoking or they'll make things worse. So...thank you, but you shouldn't do that."

"Alright. I trust you to know what you're doing. Um...Lureen also said that you're planning to adopt?"

He bit his lip, torn between wanting to gush about it and not wanting to hurt her feelings; he had known that she'd wanted to have children and probably still did. "Yeah. We've got an adoption worker coming by tomorrow to see the apartment and meet us."

"The court case won't impact on the decision?"

"Hopefully not, as long as Jack is found not guilty. If that happens, it'll go down as a false accusation and that'll be the end of it. I'm hoping that she sees it the same way when we tell her." They had decided to be honest about it, and he hoped that it was the right decision.

"I'm sure she'll appreciate your honesty, Ennis. You and Jack have nothing to be ashamed of, you know. I realise that sometimes it's weird to be around you, but that's because of our history. You know that I don't have anything against you and Jack. He's my friend too just as much as you."

"You're a smart woman, Alma," he said to her, nodding even though she couldn't see him. "You seeing anybody yourself?"

"Not right now, but always looking." Ennis smiled; she was always upbeat.

"Well, I'm sure you'll find a guy who'll be good to you the way I couldn't be. You deserve that for everything you've had to put up with and I want you to be happy too."

"Thanks, Ennis. Listen, I have to go right now but please keep me informed of what's going on. I want to know how things go for you guys."

"I will do. Thanks for everything, Alma. Okay, bye." He clicked off and thought to himself for a few moments; he hadn't expected that but he did feel bad about not including her. She was obviously a lot stronger and smarter than he'd given her credit for and he could have kicked himself for hurting her again. Still, she at least understood why and didn't hold it against him. She was offering support and best wishes to him and Jack, which was a huge deal and he knew it. He couldn't wait to tell Jack about this, and to see his face when he found out.

He carried on cleaning the apartment through the afternoon until Jack came home, and he loved the look on Jack's face when he told him about the phone call; a mixture of shock and happiness.

"Guess it really is moments like these that show you who your true friends are," he mused, thinking it over. "That's...good of her."

"Yeah. We've got friends, Jack. People who want the best for us. And I'm sure it'll be fine as long as we stick close together." He pulled Jack close, squeezing him and nuzzling his ear. Jack grinned and hugged him back, feeling it in his heart that Ennis might just be right.


	20. Chapter 20

**Chapter 20**

_November 10th, 2012_

It was now Saturday, which saw Ennis and Jack waiting nervously for their visit from the adoption worker. Both of them were looking forward to it; this would ultimately decide whether or not they were put on the waiting list.

"Just remember," Ennis said as they kept their ears peeled for the buzzer. "We've got nothing to be ashamed about. I'm sure she'll appreciate it if we tell her the truth."

Jack nodded, feeling his stomach twist with nerves. "Yeah. You're right, but still...this is nerve-wracking." Ennis leaned over to kiss him but then the buzzer sounded. "Oh God..."

"I'll get it." He went over to it and pressed the button. "Hello?"

"Ennis Del Mar? It's Claire Simmons from the adoption agency."

"Come on up," he told her, trying to keep his voice even. His eyes met Jack's from across the room, and Jack nodded at him.

"It's okay," he mouthed, and Ennis took a deep breath, jumping when there was a knock on the door. He opened it to reveal a blonde woman, some years younger than them and dressed in a grey pantsuit.

"Ms Simmons?" he asked, and she nodded. Jack had walked over to his side by now and she regarded them both.

"Mr Del Mar and Mr Twist?" she replied, and Ennis extended his hand.

"Pleased to meet you, ma'am," he told her, and Jack also shook her hand. "You can call us Ennis and Jack." They invited her inside and she looked around the apartment, noting how clean and tidy it was.

"Well, this is a nice place," she observed. "How long have you been here?"

"Oh, um...just over a year. But we lived together for longer back in San Francisco. We've been together for just over three years," Jack told her as they led her to the dining table.

"Right. And I understand you've been married for seven months? Normally I would be hesitant about letting a couple adopt a child after just a few months of marriage. But considering your circumstances, it doesn't worry me."

"We would have married sooner if we could," Ennis assured her. She nodded.

"I understand. You're not the first gay couple I've worked with." She cleared her throat. "Now then...Mr Twist, I have heard about the court case." At his groan, she smiled sympathetically at him. "You don't have to worry. I've spoken to your lawyer, background checks and everything. He told me the circumstances and I agree that it's very likely you'll be found not guilty. My boss happens to share this opinion."

"Really?" Ennis asked, feeling hopeful.

"Yes. Like he said, it'll be a false accusation and won't mean anything. You have nothing to worry about, Jack."

"We were gonna tell you," he said to her. "But I guess you beat us to it."

"Well, I would have appreciated the honesty," she said with another smile. "Nevertheless, I think we can just concentrate on today. You'll be glad to know that HIV-positive people are treated just the same as people who aren't positive." She paused. "Everyone is treated equally, which is how it should be."

"Thank you," Jack said to her, smiling. "So is there anything else you need to know?"

"I don't think so, but I would like to see the apartment. Now, I understand that your bedroom is a private space so I won't ask to see that. But could I maybe see the room which will become a nursery?"

"Yeah, sure," Ennis told her. "Um, would you like a drink or something?" he offered, and she shrugged.

"Water would be fine, thanks." He got her a bottle from the fridge with a glass and sat back down. "Jack, can I ask about your parents? I'm aware of the situation with Ennis's parents, but I don't know much about your side of the family."

"Well, my dad died two years ago. But my mom still lives in the house, out on Long Island. She's very close to us; we sometimes have lunch together in the city or go to her place, or maybe she comes for dinner here."

"Good. Now, I know that you both work full-time. It's my job to ask what arrangements might be in place for childcare if you do have a baby around."

They looked at each other, having already set plans in motion. "Well, we've talked to our bosses about that. And we've managed to negotiate something. I'm gonna start working just on Mondays and Wednesdays, so Ennis can take care of it then while he takes those days off. He'll work on Tuesdays and Fridays and I'll take care of the baby then. We both get a day off on Thursdays and the weekend."

"That sounds like a good plan." They showed her around the apartment, including the room that would be the nursery and how safe it would be on the balcony, considering it was a stone wall and not bars. They talked to her about the work they did and how they had met back in California. They had some good stories to share with her.

"Well, I think I've got everything I needed," she mused as she checked her files. "It's been a pleasure to meet you guys." She hesitated, looking at them both with a smile. "And I have to say...I think you two will make great parents. I really do."

They smiled at her and Ennis grasped Jack's hand. "You do?"

"Yes. When I get back, I will submit my report and you should hear from us soon. Hopefully, you will be put on the waiting list."

"Well, thank you. It was great to meet you too." They shook her hand and Ennis walked her to the door. When he turned around, Jack was close to him with a light in his eyes.

"It worked," he murmured, grinning when Ennis pulled him close. "We're gonna get put on the waiting list, bud..."

"We sure are," he replied, leaning in for a kiss.

* * *

After Claire left, Ennis and Jack decided to open a bottle of wine while making dinner together, wanting to celebrate the good result from their visit. They knew that despite the trial looming closer, they had a lot to be grateful for.

As Ennis was tending to the sauce for the chicken, he felt Jack sidle up to him and press against his arm. "What d'you want, huh?" he asked, grinning. Jack was looking at him.

"Just...wanted to be near you. We had a good day, didn't we? I mean, she didn't seem to care too much about the court case, and agreed that it won't affect our application if I'm found not guilty. She was really nice about it."

"Sure was." Ennis turned from the oven and smiled down into Jack's face. "Come here..." He slid his arms around Jack's waist and pulled him close. "I'm proud to call you my husband, you know."

Jack smiled back at him. "Me too. I know things aren't easy for us right now, but we're gonna be fine. I have to believe that the jury will see things our way and declare me not guilty, because I just...I can't think about the alternative. It scares the hell out of me and that's why I have nightmares."

Ennis nodded, stroking his cheek. "I know, bud. Hopefully, after Wednesday things will go back to normal. We can get back to our lives and forget all of this."

"Sounds good," Jack sighed, moving close to rest his head against Ennis's chest. "Mmm..." Ennis wrapped his arms around Jack and hugged him close.

They stayed like that for a while until Ennis's phone rang, and he reluctantly let go of Jack to answer it; Jack took over supervision of the food. "Hello?"

"Ennis? It's Claire Simmons again. I just wanted to let you know that my bosses have read my report, and that the two of you are now officially on the waiting list."

Ennis grinned at Jack when he heard this, his heart lifting at the news. "That's great, thank you so much."

"No problem; it was great to meet you. You'll be hearing from me again if anything comes up. Bye for now."

"Yep, bye." He hung up and squeezed Jack from behind, knocking the wind out of him.

"Damn, was what that for?" he gasped, turning around in surprise at the assault. "What is it?"

"That was Claire; her bosses read her report and we're now on the waiting list," he said to Jack, cupping his cheeks. Jack's face split into a wide smile.

"Oh my God!" He threw his arms around Ennis's neck, hugging him tightly and laughing. He hadn't been this happy for a while and Ennis was glad to see him like this. "I can't believe it..."

"Me neither," he replied, pulling his face away to plant his lips on Jack's. The crushing kiss sent fire through their veins but there wasn't time now; the food wouldn't take long to cook.

They broke apart, slightly aroused with flushed faces. "Um..." Ennis started, cheeks colouring as he looked away. "Well..." Jack grinned, taking his hands.

"No need to be embarrassed...that was a damn good kiss, bud."

"Yeah, but see the state of us now," Ennis replied, gesturing downwards. "We don't have time."

"Just think of something that turns you off, like...I don't know, the trial or something," Jack said, shrugging. "Nothing good about that, right?"

"Guess not." As they calmed down, they got the food ready and to the table, Ennis opening the bottle of red wine. Jack grinned; Ennis was always horny after a few glasses of that stuff. He was in for it tonight. "Okay, four days until the trial. I have to ask, Jack...is there anything you wanna do before that? We're hoping that you'll be found not guilty, but it's like you said...we have to be prepared. So if there's anything you wanna do, tell me now."

Jack thought for a moment. "Well, I'd like to go out for dinner again, maybe tomorrow night. And...I'd like to spend some time with my mom. But mostly I just wanna be with you," he finished, looking earnestly at Ennis. "You know? The night before the trial...I just wanna be alone with you, here."

Ennis nodded. "Okay, that sounds good. The trial might last a few days or more, so...I promise that I'll make every night count, starting from the night before. We'll make them special."

Jack smiled at him, grateful that he was trying so hard. "Thanks, Ennis." They clinked their glasses together and started eating, just relaxing in the comfortable silence between them.

Afterwards, they were making out on the sofa when Ennis rose up, gazing down at Jack with a look of reverence. Jack's eyes were hazy and full of love; he looked beautiful in the light coming from the fire. "God...I love you so much," Ennis sighed, nuzzling him. Jack moaned softly, very much aware of Ennis's leg rubbing against his crotch.

"I love you too. Can't believe the good day we've had after all the bad stuff." He swallowed, looking up into Ennis's eyes. "I really hope that the trial goes our way, Ennis...we've got so much to do yet and I'm not ready to leave you. I never will be." A lump formed in his throat at the thought.

Ennis sank back down to hug him close, kissing his jaw softly and trying to make him feel better. "Shh, darlin'...it's alright. I know how you're feeling. It's gonna be okay, I'm sure of it. They've got nothing to prove their accusations, and we've got everything we need to prove them wrong. Come on, Jack..."

"Ennis...take me to bed," Jack whispered in his ear. "Make me forget the pain for a while..." Ennis couldn't refuse a request like that, not when Jack needed him so much. He nodded and quickly locked up before taking Jack to the bedroom, ready to do as he was asked.

* * *

_November 13th, 2012_

By Tuesday, Ennis and Jack were spending as much time together as they possibly could. The trial would be the very next day and Jack had to admit that he was extremely nervous about the outcome and he prayed to anybody who might be listening that it would be okay.

True to his word, Ennis had paid him a lot of attention over the past few days. As for the nights...Jack would always treasure those memories no matter what happened. The sex had been incredible and Ennis had taken good care of him through the night. He was more in love than ever and he wished the circumstances could be different.

They were sitting on the sofa, having taken the day off together to make the most of the time they had left. Everything was hanging on this trial and they didn't want to plan too far ahead. Ennis held Jack close to him, nuzzling his neck and half-listening to the TV. Jack said nothing; he knew why Ennis was being like this and he understood. "Ennis? You okay?" he murmured, squeezing Ennis's arms where they covered his stomach.

"Not really," he admitted. "I don't ever wanna let you go, not after what happened the last time I did. Christ, Jack...you ended up in hospital and that's bad enough. When I think about what could happen to you this time..."

Jack moved further back into him, enjoying the warmth radiating from Ennis. "I know. Scares the hell out of me, to be honest. I hate this waiting around."

"Yeah." Ennis's phone rang and he answered it without letting go of Jack; he did seem to be attaching himself to Jack at every opportunity and Jack would have found it quite sweet were it not for Ennis's fear. "Hello?"

"Ennis, it's me," came Alma's voice. "I just wanted to say best of luck to you and Jack for tomorrow."

"Thanks, Alma. It really means a lot to both of us how supportive you're being." He really was grateful to her for everything she was doing for them, even if she couldn't actually do anything at all. He appreciated it anyway.

"Jack doesn't deserve this kind of treatment from your parents. He would never do what he's being accused of. This isn't fair on either of you and I hope that it goes well."

"We're hoping it does. Anyway..."

"Yeah. Have you guys heard from Lureen yet?"

"No, why? I thought she was working today?"

Alma hesitated, and when she spoke again Ennis got the impression that she was holding something back. "Well, I'm sure she'll talk to you as soon as she gets a chance. I'd better go, then. Bye, Ennis...and give my best to Jack."

"I will, thanks. Bye." He hung up and stared at his phone, thinking. "That was weird..."

"What?"

"Alma sounded weird after saying good luck. She asked about Lureen, and then sounded like she knew something but didn't wanna say."

Jack frowned. "You think she's okay?"

"Yeah...Alma would've told us if there was something wrong..." He knew that Lureen could take care of herself, but still.

Jack smiled a little. "Lureen's up to something, then. I know her, Ennis...she's got something planned."

"You think it's something to do with us?" Ennis asked, brows furrowing.

"Well, it's a hell of a coincidence. The day before the trial? Maybe she's on her way here so that she can give evidence." After knowing Lureen for so long, he knew when she was plotting.

Ennis considered this. "That sure would be good. She can't be talking to my parents; they'll already be over here for tomorrow."

"Right...any idea where they're staying?"

"Don't know and don't care. I don't even wanna see them until tomorrow, and even then I'll be ignoring them," Ennis replied vehemently. Jack nodded and then heard his own phone ringing.

"Hey, Mom."

"Hi sweetie," she replied. "Wanted to wish you good luck for tomorrow. What time should I be at the courthouse?"

"It starts at eleven so we should be there by half ten," he told her. "Alma just called Ennis to wish us good luck, and she sounded weird. She seems to know something about Lureen, and I reckon it's that she's on her way here to stand up for us."

"That sounds possible," Karen replied. Jack glanced at Ennis; he was scrolling through the names on his phone and pausing on Lureen's. Jack nudged him and nodded encouragingly. "Ennis is trying to call her right now."

"Okay. Do you know where Ennis's parents are staying?"

"He doesn't want to know, and neither do I. We want them to keep away from us."

"Alright. Make sure that you get some sleep tonight, okay?"

"Yep. Bye, Mom." He hung up and watched Ennis trying to call Lureen. "Anything?"

"Not even ringing...that means it's switched off," he replied, stopping his attempt and looking confused. "That's weird..."

"Maybe she really is on her way here," Jack replied as they put their phones down and resumed their earlier position. "We did ask her, after all. And I know she said she would if she didn't have to work. And you're supposed to turn your phone off when on a plane, so it makes sense."

"Yeah." Ennis rubbed Jack's stomach absentmindedly, occasionally pressing a kiss to his ear. Jack smiled and relaxed against him again, feeling secure and well-loved. "Anyway...you want something to eat? I could call for take-out." He didn't feel like cooking and could sense that Jack didn't either.

"Sure," Jack replied, getting up to use the bathroom while Ennis called for the food. They usually got pizza, not really liking anything else. It was quick and easy.

While he was washing his hands, Jack thought of Lureen and what she might be up to; he knew her well and had a strong suspicion of where she was, or at least where she was heading. He hoped he was right; he needed every friendly face he could get tomorrow.

* * *

Not long after the pizza had been delivered, Ennis and Jack were eating it on the sofa when there was another knock on the door. It wasn't unusual for someone to enter the building without being buzzed in if they caught someone leaving, which sometimes worried them for security reasons. Jack got up to answer it, and when he opened the door he saw a familiar face grinning at him.

"Long time no see, Jack," Lureen said to him, a suitcase next to her and a wide smile on her face. Jack grinned back.

"I knew it. Alma asked if we'd heard from you and she sounded really weird. I knew you were up to something." He hugged her tightly, very glad that she was here to support him. Ennis was also up by now, approaching the door.

"So you made it," he said with a smile, and she broke away from Jack to hug him too.

"Wasn't sure I would, but since I'm the manager of that place I can do whatever I want. It's all sorted; I've got this guy working for me who is more than capable of taking care of the shop for a few days. I wanted to be here."

"How did you get in?" Jack asked as he pulled her suitcase inside.

"Well, I wanted to surprise you so I buzzed one of your neighbours. Luckily they remembered me from the last time I was here and let me in." She smiled between them. "So how did the visit from the adoption worker go?"

"Really well. She liked us, and we've been put on the waiting list," Jack told her as they led her to the living area. "She'd talked to Peter and agrees that we don't have anything to worry about with the trial."

Lureen helped herself to pizza and curled up in one of the chairs. "I'm glad to hear that. You know I've been worried about how tomorrow might impact everything. And yes, I did tell Alma that I was heading over here but asked her not to say anything."

"She did sound strange," Ennis admitted, giving her a knowing look. "But we're both glad that you're here."

She smiled. "So I'm guessing that your parents are somewhere in the city?"

"Yeah. Don't know where they're staying and I don't want to. As soon as this is over, I don't want anything to do with them."

"I understand. Parents are supposed to love their child unconditionally, and support all of the decisions they make. You said they were supportive when you came out, so it made you think that no matter what, you could rely on them to be there for you. Now all this is happening and it's shaken everything you've ever believed about them."

"Yeah," he agreed simply. "They've lost my trust for good, and just can't seem to accept my choice to be with Jack." He exchanged a glance with his husband, who looked sad on his behalf. "But I don't care," he added firmly. "This is what I want and right now I'm just focusing on getting us through tomorrow."

Jack nodded. "You're right...we should just concentrate on that." Lureen watched them interact with each other and felt very sorry for them; they loved each other so much and yet tomorrow they could lose everything. Worse still, what if the trial lasted more than one day? Everything would be hanging by a thread and they wouldn't know if the thread was going to be cut or not. She didn't understand why Ennis's parents were doing this.

"Guys...I want you to know that I'm gonna do everything I can to help tomorrow," she told them. "I mean it...I remember what it was like when you broke up and I never want to see either of you so unhappy ever again."

They managed to smile at her. "Thanks, Lureen," Jack said to her. "We really appreciate you being here for us. Um...did you want a drink?"

She accepted and Jack got up to get her one; she looked at Ennis. "How's he coping?" she asked in a low voice that wouldn't carry to the kitchen.

"He had another nightmare last week," Ennis replied, looking down. "That he was in prison, and...that Daniel Waters attacked him."

"You mean...?"

Ennis nodded, breathing deeply. "Yeah. It scared the hell out of him and I was sat here, just holding him and trying to soothe him. Took a while..."

"I bet it did," she replied, shaking her head. "We can't possibly imagine what it was like for him, both during the assault and after. That's why he's good friends with that other guy, Sam. He knows what it was like."

"Yeah. You know...I've never even been jealous of that because I know they're not interested in each other at all. I know Jack wouldn't cheat on me and Sam isn't the type to sneak around like that. I'm glad he has a friend who knows what it's like. If it were me I'd want to have someone around who knows what I'm going through, no matter how much I love Jack."

She smiled. "You two are so strong now, and you trust each other. That's all you need to know." Jack came back with a drink for her and sat back down, curling up against Ennis comfortably.

After a while, Ennis headed off to bed and Jack was locking up. Just as Lureen was approaching the spare room, she felt Jack grasp her arm. "Lureen...can you promise me something?" he asked in a low voice.

"Sure, what?"

"If I am locked up...he says he'll do whatever it takes to get me out of there as soon as he can. If that happens, just...try to keep an eye on him, okay? Make sure he eats and gets some sleep now and then, no matter how hard he tries for me. I'd feel better if I knew he had a friend looking out for him."

Lureen smiled up at Jack and kissed him on the cheek. "I promise. Night, Jack."

"Night, Lureen."

* * *

Jack closed the door behind him and was immediately aware of a warmth at his back; Ennis had slipped up behind him and pulled him close. "Mmm..."

"Ready to go to bed?" Ennis murmured in his ear. Jack nodded.

"Yep..." Ennis led him to the bed, Jack's hand in his own. When they reached it, he turned to Jack and cupped his face. "Darlin'...I know what this night means to you. Could be our last time together, or it might not be. We don't know how long this trial will go on for, and we'll probably have more nights together before it's over."

"But this is the last one before it all starts. I know what you're trying to say, Ennis, and I agree. We should make this night special."

Without a word, Ennis leaned in and kissed him. He kept it soft at first, just on the lips. Jack moaned softly and pressed closer, moulding his body to Ennis's and sighing into his mouth. When they broke apart, he smiled. "Come here..." He started to undress Jack, pulling the shirt from his shoulders and tossing it to the floor. Jack did the same to him as they kissed, exposing each other slowly and enjoying every sight that met their eyes. "You're so beautiful," he whispered to Jack, who smiled.

"You're not so bad yourself," he replied, looking up and down Ennis's body. Neither of them bothered with the gym anymore, mostly due to a lack of time, but they had their suspicions that their regular physical activities kept them in good shape.

They sank down to the bed together, shuffling up to the pillows. Ennis gently pushed Jack down onto his back, leaning over him and giving him a loving look. Jack smiled up at him, eyes full of trust. "Ennis..."

"Shh..." Ennis murmured, pressing a finger to Jack's lips. "Don't say anything. Just let me take care of you tonight, okay?"

Jack nodded and smiled when Ennis kissed his neck, feeling as if he could melt under the touch. He closed his eyes and was dimly aware of Ennis moving to settle between his legs, still kissing and touching him. He sighed and opened his eyes again to see Ennis watching him, a look on his face that made Jack feel like the most precious thing in the world. At his questioning smile, Ennis kissed the tip of his nose and reached over for the lube, causing a flutter of anticipation to run through Jack. "You wanna?"

"Yeah," Jack breathed, widening his legs even further. He needed this so much and he knew that Ennis was aware of that. "Please..."

Ennis coated himself with the lube and started to push in, finding his target and easing himself into Jack. The soft gasp from below told him that he was on the right track, and he kept going until he was fully inside. Jack had closed his eyes again but they were now open, gazing up at him. Ennis knew how much Jack trusted him in such a vulnerable position, and it humbled him.

"You okay?" he asked softly, and Jack nodded, wrapping his legs around Ennis's waist. At this familiar signal they knew so well, Ennis started moving inside him. He pushed his hips tight against Jack in a fluid movement, gently stroking Jack's insides and feeling a familiar warmth take over him. Jack groaned and let his head fall back to the pillow, trying to keep hold of Ennis's shoulders and fully aware of the pressure building up inside him.

"Oh..." he sighed, allowing Ennis to kiss his neck again. Ennis picked up the pace slightly, moving steadily in a well-known rhythm that he knew would make it good for Jack. "Ennis..."

"I love you, Jack," Ennis breathed in his ear, kissing it. "Love you so much." Jack bit his lip when he felt Ennis pushing even deeper and finding the sweet spot.

"Oh God..." he moaned, which told Ennis he had found what he was looking for. He pressed at it with each thrust, now moving quicker. "Touch me, please," Jack groaned, lifting his hips.

Ennis took hold of him and did as he was asked, stroking at Jack even as he moved. He felt Jack bucking underneath him and knew he was close. He planted his knees firmly on the bed and thrust harder, making the bed squeak with the movement. Jack yelled out and shot between them, coating Ennis's stomach and straining. It didn't take long for Ennis to follow him, and soon he was sinking down onto his satisfied lover. "Jack..."

"I love you too," Jack sighed into his ear, smiling and wrapping his arms around Ennis's back. "Thank you..." He did feel a lot better after this, and he knew that Ennis was trying his best to make things better for him.

"You're not the only one who got something out of that, you know," Ennis murmured, nuzzling him. "I love being with you like this..."

"Me too," Jack replied, wincing slightly when Ennis pulled out but soon relaxing. "I'll remember this tomorrow when I start worrying, and thinking that something's gonna go wrong. I'll remember the wonderful man I married and how much he loves me."

Ennis smiled and rose up slightly, brushing Jack's hair away from his face. "Good. This is what we've gotta hang on to, Jack...moments like this. I swear...I'll do whatever it takes to keep you by my side." This he knew in his heart; he simply couldn't live without Jack.

Jack pulled Ennis's mouth down to his in a searing kiss, one that sent volts through both of them and reminded them of what they were fighting for. If Jack was locked up, then Ennis would remember this moment while he fought to help him.

They fell asleep in this position, not wanting to move away from each other even slightly. They wanted to be as close as possible during these final hours before they had to fight for their relationship.


	21. Chapter 21

**Chapter 21**

_November 14th, 2012_

Jack woke up on the morning of the trial and stared at the ceiling for a while. No matter how long the trial actually lasted, for it could easily be a few days, today was the start of it. This would decide his fate and he was extremely nervous.

He had thoroughly enjoyed the lovemaking last night and did appreciate what Ennis was doing for him, but he couldn't help worrying that they were on borrowed time. If the decision was put off until tomorrow, then tonight could well be their last one together for a while if he was found guilty. What might happen then? He could try running, but then that would only make things so much worse; he would be sacrificing everything forever and that couldn't happen. At least if he stayed put, he had a chance of being with Ennis again; he couldn't ask Ennis to run with him and be a fugitive.

He kept turning to try and get back to sleep, since it was still early, but he just couldn't. Instead he ended up waking Ennis, who looked at him in the early morning light. Ennis's eyes were soft and looked sad for him. "Hey...you could wake the dead over there, you know."

Jack sighed. "Can't get back to sleep. Keep thinking about today and what might happen..." He squeezed his eyes shut, trying to keep the tears at bay. "Keep hearing someone in the jury saying that I'm guilty..."

Ennis cupped his cheek, coaxing Jack to open his eyes. "Darlin'...I know how it gets to you..." He softly stroked Jack's skin, his heart feeling heavy at how Jack was taking this. "Come on, try to cheer up..."

He wrapped his arm around Jack's waist and tugged him closer, so that Jack ended up with his head in the crook of Ennis's shoulder. Then Ennis started to rub his back, soothing him. They had two hours before they had to get up and Jack needed his sleep.

There was a knock on the door, which caused them both to look over curiously; why was she up at this time? They had never known her to be an early riser. "Guys?" came Lureen's voice. "Are you awake?"

"Yeah, it's okay," Ennis replied, making sure that they were covered by the quilt; as much as Lureen accepted their relationship they didn't want to show her everything they had. "Come on in."

Lureen poked her head inside the door. "Sorry to disturb you, but I need to nip out before the trial. There's something I meant to bring with me but I forgot and it can't wait."

Ennis nodded and tossed her the keys for the front door. "Sure, go ahead. Just don't be too long, okay?" Jack had stayed in the same position, just watching and listening.

"I won't." Lureen didn't say anything else, but she had been glad to see them embracing on this particular morning; it gave her some comfort to know that Ennis was taking care of Jack at this time. She knew how much Jack needed it.

After she left, Ennis turned to see that Jack was still awake but silent, playing with his chest hair and looking a million miles away. "Jack?"

"Just too nervous to get back to sleep," he sighed, causing Ennis to squeeze him tighter. "I can't relax..."

Ennis thought for a moment; he was a little tired but he couldn't sleep while Jack was like this. It wouldn't be fair for him to just leave Jack to stew by himself. "You want me to give you a backrub? We've got some oil left."

Jack smiled up at him. "That sounds good, thanks." He rolled onto his stomach and smiled when Ennis kissed his cheek, straddling him with the oil in his hand.

"Just try and relax," Ennis soothed, warming the oil between his hands and seeing Jack get comfortable. Jack nodded, knowing that he could count on Ennis to make him feel at least a little better.

"I'll try..." He sighed when he felt Ennis's hands on him, rubbing and smoothing out his tense muscles. Ennis always seemed to know what he needed, even if he didn't know himself. It was just one of many things that made their relationship so amazing to him. "That's good..." he murmured at the touch. Ennis smiled and kept going until he felt Jack fall asleep. He pressed a soft kiss to Jack's neck and slid out of bed, heading for the bathroom.

A couple of hours later, they were both up and Lureen was back; they were making breakfast together and talking about anything but the trial. Karen and Peter would both meet them at the courthouse, and Peter had warned them that Jack would have to be kept separate since he was the accused. Ennis had been livid to find out that they would be keeping Jack in handcuffs, but Peter would be with him and he would be okay.

"So how's the coffeehouse doing?" Ennis asked as they sat down together. Lureen nodded.

"It's great, but I miss you guys. Every time I see people in that corner booth I remember how you used to sit there. It's where you first met, after all."

"Yeah. Maybe when all of this is over we can take a trip over there and have coffee," Jack suggested, knowing that he was counting on the trial going their way but deciding not to think about that. He had to think that way because he couldn't consider the alternative.

"Sounds good to me," Ennis replied, nodding. He too couldn't think about Jack being found guilty, not when it hurt him so much. Jack smiled at him and they started eating, just focusing on this time together and not thinking about later. They had to leave in an hour and weren't looking forward to it at all.

But as Jack looked at Ennis, he knew that somehow it would all work out in the end.

* * *

They were at the courthouse for half past ten, and had only just greeted Karen and Peter when they were ambushed met by an attorney. "Mr Twist, I have to take you to a private room now, since you are the accused."

Jack nodded and felt Ennis squeeze his hand. "At least let me say goodbye to my husband," he replied, refusing to take no for an answer. He turned to Ennis and sighed. "Well...guess I'll see you soon," he said, looking up into Ennis's eyes. "Don't worry; Peter's gonna be there and he'll look after me."

"I know." They kissed firmly for a few moments before Jack reluctantly broke away, smiling sadly. "Love you, Jack."

"Love you too..." He waved goodbye and set off with the attorney, and Ennis exchanged a glance with Peter.

"Look after him." Peter nodded and all too soon, Jack was out of sight. Ennis sighed and they went to sit down. "Did you see that? Just tearing him away like he's some kind of monster..."

Lureen patted his arm. "It's okay. I'm sure that this will be over soon. Just try and think positive, okay?" He nodded and sat back, looking around. They hadn't been to this courthouse before; the trial of Daniel Waters had taken place in Manhattan. It was a lovely building, but he couldn't really appreciate it right now. All he cared about was Jack and getting them through this. He hoped with all his heart that this would go their way.

After about ten minutes, Lureen looked down the corridor and narrowed her eyes. "Ennis." He looked over and saw that his parents were there, glancing nervously at the group. Lureen had never met them but had seen a photo, so she recognised them. "They've got a nerve to sit so close."

"Yep." He met his father's eyes and felt his blood boil, remembering the CCTV footage of his father stealing the records. Soon enough, it would all come out and his parents would regret doing this to his Jack. He would be perfectly happy to cut them off after this.

A few minutes ticked by, and then Ennis saw his mother get up, heading for him. Ennis stood up quickly with his arms folded, wanting to come across as hostile. "Yes?" he asked coldly, and she cleared her throat.

"I just want you to remember that we did this for you," she told him. "And that there's really nothing you can do to turn this around."

He smirked, remembering the photos that would be produced. He couldn't wait to see their faces over that one. "Oh yeah? We'll see."

"Ennis...it's too late. That man...he's gonna be locked up so you should start accepting that."

"I don't think so. And there's no guarantee that he'll be found guilty." He was aware of Karen and Lureen standing on either side of him. "We're here for Jack, and you two are on your own. You've got no chance."

"Ennis," she repeated, and he couldn't believe how deluded she really was about this. "He's going to be found guilty. You should divorce him and come back to live with us."

He could practically hear Lureen growling next to him, and stepped closer to his mother. Never in his life had he felt such animosity towards her. "Jack's the love of my life," he hissed to her. "And you are _not_ taking him away from me. You hear me? I'll be damned if I'm gonna let you destroy everything we've worked for these past few years. It's not gonna happen." He stepped away and turned his back, moving away to sit somewhere else. Lureen and Karen followed him, but not before giving his mother dirty looks. They both wanted to say something but decided not to; they were here to support Jack and not cause trouble. But Lureen was sorely tempted to slap the woman.

Elsewhere, Jack was sat with Peter and grumbling about the handcuffs they had slapped on him. He knew it was standard procedure for a criminal court but he hated it. At least they would be removed once court commenced, but he still didn't like it.

"I know you don't like it," Peter said to him, giving him a sympathetic look. "But it won't be for much longer."

"Wish I could've stayed with the others," Jack replied. "What if they've already seen Ennis's parents? I bet his mother is still trying to convince him that it's for the best."

"Then she clearly doesn't understand him, or how much he loves you. She does seem very deluded about why they're doing this."

"I can't wait to see their faces when we bring out the photos," Jack said, smirking. They were in a folder on the desk, ready to be presented to court. "They're not expecting that." Parti of him felt very happy about deceiving them, as he felt as though they deserved it.

"True. All you have to do is stick to the facts, like we've practised. Their argument is very weak and they know it, which proves that they stole the records to give their argument substance, or at least try to. You and Ennis have something much stronger to support your claim, something that can't be contested."

Jack nodded. "Yeah. Look, Peter...I just wanna say thank you. Not just for your help with this, but for the thing with Daniel Waters too. Ennis and I both really appreciate what you've done for us."

Peter smiled at him. "It's been a pleasure to know both of you, Jack. I'm glad I could help." A voice came on over the intercom, instructing everyone here for the trial to make their way to the courtroom. They stood up and exited the room, where they were met by an officer to escort them there. Jack bit his lip and kept quiet; Ennis wouldn't want him to make a scene.

_Here we go, _he thought to himself, thinking of Ennis. _This is for us, bud._

* * *

They all entered the courtroom and Jack sat at one of the tables with Peter; to his relief the handcuffs were removed and he spotted Ennis's parents sitting at the other table. He saw the looks of disgust they gave him but held his tongue; it would go smoother for him if he didn't make a scene. He looked behind him and saw the people he loved the most sitting there; Ennis, Karen and Lureen. They gave him encouraging smiles and he managed to return one before they were instructed to stand up for the judge.

When they were seated, he began to speak. "We are here today for the case of Keith and Sarah Del Mar vs. John C Twist Jr, whom they are accusing of the attempted murder of their son Ennis Del Mar. As I understand it, the latter is the husband of the accused and was infected with the HIV virus from him on September 4th of this year. Such infection, if found to be intentional, would constitute the charges that Mr Twist is being accused of. Are these facts correct, Mr Thompson?"

Peter stood up. "Yes, Your Honour," he replied, and the judge nodded.

"Very well. How does your client plead to the charges?"

"Not guilty." Jack heard Ennis's mother scoff at this, and clenched his jaw. Peter then sat down and gave him a look that told Jack not to lose his temper.

"Very well. We will hear a statement from Mr Twist first to get his version of events and will go from there."

Jack went up to the stand, where he had to swear by the Bible to tell the truth. He thought of it as ironic, considering how the Bible spoke about people like him and Ennis.

"Mr Twist," asked Peter. "Can you please tell us how long you and Mr Del Mar have been a couple?"

"Since August 2009," he replied, eyes flicking to Ennis.

"And was Mr Del Mar aware of your HIV status right away?"

"I told him on our first date, before we did anything. I felt as if he had the right to know. We agreed to take things slowly. We consummated our relationship a week after we met."

"And how has the virus shaped your relationship prior to your husband's infection?"

"Well, it hasn't been easy. Sometimes we struggled with a few aspects but we talked things out and managed to make it work." He and Peter had already practiced this beforehand so he knew what to expect.

"I understand that in February 2010, you and your husband briefly separated. Can you tell us what happened?"

Jack cleared his throat. "We, um...we were having intercourse and the condom broke. Ennis got scared about being infected and we decided to take a break so that he could think things over. We were separated for about three days."

"What happened to bring you back together?"

"I got pancreatitis from one of the HIV medications and ended up in hospital. Ennis rushed to my side and told me he wanted us to be together," Jack replied with a fond smile. "And we've been together ever since."

Jack was then asked about the night when he'd infected Ennis, putting emphasis on how it had been an accident and the effects it had had on their relationship thus far. He also talked about how Ennis's parents had never accepted the relationship after finding out about him being positive and how he felt as if they had it in for him. Jack knew that if they were going to win this, they had to paint Ennis's parents in a bad light while still telling the truth; it wasn't too difficult.

When he had been questioned by Ennis's parents' lawyer, who seemed determined to break him down, he was finally dismissed from the stand and let out a sigh. "That was horrible," he murmured to Peter while the judge was distracted.

"I know, but we're doing well. I think even he knows that his clients have nothing to go on. And just between you and me, he's not the best lawyer I've ever seen." Jack smirked and then Karen was called to the stand.

This was harder for Jack; it was her job to talk about Jack's infection and how it had impacted his life. He knew how much it hurt her to have to talk about that but she had agreed.

"So in your opinion," asked Peter. "How likely is it that your son would purposefully infect someone else without their consent?"

"Absolutely impossible," she replied confidently. "Jack loves Ennis and would never do that to him. Jack...he still has nightmares about what happened to him so it's very unlikely that he would put Ennis through that."

"So you are saying that if your son were to infect his partner on purpose, then it would be with his consent and approval, perhaps even at his request?" Jack looked up; this was their selling point for convincing the jury that he was innocent.

"I would expect so."

"So then we could say that the charges of attempted murder are quite unfounded," Peter said, trying to keep a straight face even as he pictured what Ennis's parents might look like right now.

"Yes."

"Very well. Thank you Mrs Twist, you can stand down now." Karen smiled at Jack as she passed and resumed her seat next to Ennis; he covered her hand with his own.

"Thank you," he murmured to her. "You did a great job."

"Peter's not doing so bad either," she replied. "But I did catch him trying not to smile when he talked about the accusations being unfounded."

Ennis smirked and turned his attention back to the scene before him. Jack had looked tense when they'd first walked in, but he seemed to be doing better now that they were fighting and appeared to be winning. He knew he was next up and he braced himself; he was doing this for them and the life they wanted together.

* * *

Sure enough, Ennis was called up and he exchanged a small smile with Jack on his way up. After swearing to tell the truth, he saw Peter stand up. He wasn't afraid; they had gone over the questions before so many times that he felt quite confident.

"Mr Del Mar, can you please describe the impact on your relationship with Mr Twist when he infected you?"

He took a deep breath. "Well...it wasn't easy for either of us. Jack felt very guilty about it and for a while it was me comforting him because he hated himself. But after my parents rejected us that turned around because I was feeling miserable. He was there for me like I was there for him; it's always been like that for us."

"Okay. And I understand that you and Mr Twist are wishing to adopt a child, and that you had a visit from an adoption worker this previous Saturday?"

"Yeah. She knew about the court case and she gave us her support for it. We've been put on the official waiting list."

"When you and Mr Twist were planning your wedding, you sent an invitation to your parents but it was never acknowledged?"

"That's right. We didn't even get an RSVP or anything." He glanced at his parents; they didn't even look sorry for it.

"So you would say that your parents have always had a grudge against Jack? And that they seem incapable of accepting your relationship with him?"

"Pretty much," he agreed. "They claim that they just want the best for me but they've put us through this court case and it's having a bad effect on both of us, especially Jack. As far as I can see, they don't care about what they're doing to him."

"Okay. So would you say that your parents' accusations against Jack are based on some kind of distaste for him? Perhaps even spite?"

Ennis nodded, and looked at his parents; they looked livid. "I would say so. They've been horrible to him every time they've seen him, and it looks like they'll do anything to have him put in jail and away from me."

"Okay." Ennis was questioned a little more about how having the virus was affecting him personally regarding his health and then he was allowed to stand down. As he passed Jack, he surreptitiously gave him a wink and Jack grinned; things were going their way now.

The judge called for recess after this and Ennis watched sadly as Jack was led away from him again, and then followed Karen and Lureen into the corridor. He needed fresh air more than anything, but they still had a long way to go. It looked as if the trial would be referred to another day with everything they had to get through, but that was okay. He just wanted Jack in his arms again.

"This is going really well," Karen observed, smiling at him as they sat down.

"Sure is. We're really making them look bad and I can't believe that it's working..." They spotted his parents leaving the room and Ennis couldn't help but smirk at them; he knew that they knew he and Jack were winning this fight.

"You wanna go and gloat at them?" Lureen asked slyly, also smirking. Ennis seriously considered it; they could do so without causing too many problems. As long as they didn't reveal anything about the photos they would be alright.

"Might be fun." He and Lureen walked over to them. "I thought you said that we were gonna lose this fight? That Jack's gonna be put away?"

His mother tried to keep her composure. "Ennis, it's early yet. We still have the medical records."

_Which you stole, _he hissed in his mind, looking forward to the moment when the images were brought up. "Well...good luck with that. They don't mean a thing, you know. They don't prove that it was done without my consent and you know it."

"Well...we hope that one day you'll see why we're doing this. We're doing this for you, Ennis. He's not good for you." He still couldn't believe that she was talking like this.

"You're not good for me," he hit back, feeling a sense of grim satisfaction when she looked shocked. Whenever he felt guilty about talking to his parents like this, he remembered what they were trying to do to his Jack and steeled himself. "You just don't understand what we have and I feel sorry for you. Neither of you have any idea how good he is for me and how much I love him."

He stepped away and started walking back to Karen, but Lureen remained where she was, facing down this woman that she had never even met until today.

"I just want you to know...that until Jack met Ennis he had nobody. His mother was on his side but he still felt alone because he left home. Your son gave him a reason to keep going. He was miserable before they met and he might not even be alive if not for Ennis loving him and being there for him. Ennis is right; you've got no idea how good they are for each other."

She stepped back and joined the others, having said what she'd wanted to ever since Jack was arrested. She sat back down next to Ennis and nudged him, smiling.

"You enjoyed that, didn't you?" he asked.

"Sure did. She deserved it, after everything they've put you guys through."

"I agree, but you didn't have to do that..."

She shook her head. "I wanted to, for you guys." She sat back. "Can't wait to see their faces when those photos are brought out. That should be interesting."

"Yeah." Ennis couldn't stop thinking about Jack and how they had smiled at each other in that room. Even though they couldn't talk to each other, he still felt as if they had communicated somehow and were in understanding. They both knew that things were going this way.

* * *

Once they were back in the courtroom, Lureen was called to the stand and gave her evidence. She was asked about Jack's life after his own infection but prior to meeting Ennis, and she was careful to point out just how much Ennis had done Jack the world of good by making him happy. She knew that all of it would show the jury just how impossible it was for Jack to do what he was being accused of.

"Miss Newsome, I understand that prior to the current events, you were going to be a surrogate mother to the child wanted by Mr Twist and his husband, is that correct?"

"Yes, it is. Ennis was gonna be the biological father and I would have been the mother."

"And Mr Twist shared his husband's enthusiasm for the idea of having a child biologically?"

"As far as I know, it was his idea in the first place. He realised he was ready to have kids and suggested it to Ennis, who agreed."

"So then Mr Twist wouldn't do anything to purposefully jeopardise their future with children?" asked Peter, and she smiled slightly. She knew what he was doing; what he had been doing all through the trial. They were being biased but still telling the truth, so it was all legal.

"Absolutely not. He felt strange about having a child with Ennis that he wouldn't be related to, but I know he wanted it just as much as Ennis did. There's no question about that."

"Thank you, Miss Newsome. You may stand down now."

She did so and felt a flutter of anticipation; she knew that the defining moment of the trial was about to happen.

"Your Honour, we have no more witnesses to call," stated Peter. "But we do have some evidence in Mr Twist's defence which proves his innocence." The judge waved his hand in acceptance and Peter opened up the envelope containing the photos. "I have here images from CCTV footage of Mr Keith Del Mar stealing his son's medical records from the rental car that Mr Twist and Mr Del Mar took with them during their trip to Mill Valley from September 22nd." A murmur rose up from the jury and Ennis bit back a grin. "They were taken from the car without Ennis Del Mar's consent or even knowledge until after Mr Twist's arrest later."

"Is this so?" asked the judge, giving Ennis's parents a very dark look. "Please elaborate, Mr Thompson."

"Your Honour," Peter continued, now handing the photos to the jury for them to see closer. "The argument against Mr Twist is a very weak one as far as I can see. They know full well that their son is in a loving and committed relationship with Mr Twist, and as such it is clear to them that Mr Twist would never harm their son in this way. If the infection had been intentional, then it would have been with Ennis Del Mar's consent, which proves that this was not attempted murder."

Jack felt his heart racing; he was starting to truly believe that this would go his way.

"Ennis Del Mar's parents therefore knew that if they were to have any chance of punishing their son-in-law, they would need some kind of proof. Thus, the records were stolen. However, those records do not prove that the infection was intentional, only that it happened. Nobody but Mr Twist and Mr Del Mar know what really happened that night, and it is clear that Mr Twist would not do what he is being accused of. These accusations are extremely desperate and not backed by any significant evidence, but we have proof that Ennis Del Mar's parents know it was an accident; they needed something to make their claim more credible."

The judge looked at Keith sternly after looking over the photos. "Mr Del Mar, is that you in those photographs?" he asked, handing them over. Keith nodded, and Jack could see how shaken he was.

"Yes, Your Honour," he replied in a low voice, and Ennis closed his eyes in relief. He'd admitted it.

The judge nodded. "I see. Well, I personally believe that this changes things a great deal." He was handed back the photos and cleared his throat. "I am going to postpone this case for today and examine these photos. I ask the jury to make their decisions by tomorrow. Court will resumed tomorrow at eleven o'clock, and in the meantime Mr Twist is allowed to return to his family for the rest of this day and until tomorrow morning." He looked at Keith again. "I should warn you, Mr Del Mar, that if Mr Twist is declared not guilty, your son will be allowed to press charges for theft. Case postponed until tomorrow." He banged the gavel and Jack sat back, sighing.

"Well...that was interesting," he observed, grinning at Peter.

"Sure was. I'll tidy up here; you go and get to your husband." Jack nodded and passed Ennis's parents without a word; he did notice how they looked defeated and fought back the urge to gloat at them.

Ennis met him at the top of the steps, immediately pulling him into his arms. "Oh, darlin'..."

"I know," Jack replied, squeezing him tightly. "Can't believe it...it's all working out like Peter said it would..."

He smiled at his mother and Lureen over Ennis's shoulder, but then felt Ennis tense. "What's wrong?" he asked, pulling his face away. Ennis's jaw was set and Jack looked over his own shoulder; Ennis's parents were standing there.

"Well...seems like you had a few tricks up your sleeve," his mother said, trying to remain dignified. "Very sneaky, Ennis."

He regarded her emotionlessly. "If I'm sneaky, or anything like that, I learned from the masters." He took Jack's hand and led their group out of the room, not wanting to exchange any more words with those people. They had been his family once, but now he had a new one and he was happier for it.


	22. Chapter 22

**Chapter 22**

_November 15th, 2012_

The next morning, Ennis and Jack were lying in bed together and kissing deeply. They were very happy with how the trial had started yesterday and were fairly confident that they would get the result they wanted, but were both well aware that there was still a slight chance of it turning around. They had to be prepared for anything.

Jack pulled Ennis closer to him and kissed him fiercely. "I want you inside me," he breathed when they broke apart, and Ennis nodded, dizzy with lust. He wanted to but he had to be sure that Jack was okay.

"Are you sure"? he asked, and Jack looked into his eyes. He needed this more than ever.

"I am. Ennis...I know we're sure that things are gonna go our way, but...I just...I need to feel you there right now. Need some reassurance, you know?"

Ennis stroked his cheek. "I know, bud. Just lie back..." He gently pressed a hand to Jack's chest and coaxed him down to lie on his back, knowing that Jack just needed him before they carried on with the trial. "Just relax, okay? I'm here...won't let anybody hurt you, I swear." He would rather get hurt himself than allow someone to hurt Jack; he'd take anything to keep Jack alive and safe.

Jack smiled up at him. "I know, Ennis. I love you..."

"I love you too," Ennis whispered, smoothing the lube over himself and easing in between Jack's legs. "I'll take care of you..." He started to push in, making shushing sounds when Jack groaned at the initial pain. Caressing Jack's face to soothe him, Ennis pushed his way fully inside and got into position. He felt Jack's legs wrap around his waist and smiled; that was a clear indication that he was ready.

"Make love to me," Jack breathed, his eyes locking onto Ennis's as his lover started moving. "Oh..."

"I'll always love you, Jack," he said softly, nuzzling Jack's ear. "No matter what happens. If you're locked up, I'll get you out. If you're hurt, I'll nurse you back to health. If it becomes too much and you have a breakdown, I'll be there to help you through it."

Jack bit his lip, the sweet words making him emotional in the state he was in. These words told him just how much Ennis loved him, and he would never forget that. His eyes slid shut as he felt Ennis moving smoothly inside him, kissing and nipping at his skin as he went. Jack trembled with arousal and could feel himself leaking onto his stomach. "Ennis...this is wonderful..."

"You deserve the best," Ennis replied, holding him close. "We're good for each other, Jack...no matter what anybody says." He was referring to his parents, but they had agreed not to talk about them here, in their bed. This was private.

"You're right," he choked out, groaning slightly when Ennis found his prostate. "You're right and I...I know that now. We need each other..."

Ennis rose up and planted his lips on Jack's, pushing his tongue into Jack's mouth and searching hungrily. With his hips rocking steadily against Jack and one hand between Jack's legs, he was drawing close to the finish line but never wanted it to end. If they finished then time would move on and they would have to get up and go back to the courthouse, and he wasn't ready yet.

All too soon, it was over. Ennis sank down onto Jack and started breathing deeply, not caring how Jack had shot all over his chest or how sweaty they were; this was good. "Darlin'..." he sighed, tiredly kissing Jack's shoulder and pulling out.

"Yeah...that was good, baby. Sure will get me through the day."

"Mmm...you know, it's pretty much a given that they'll let you off. I mean, you saw the judge's face when they brought out the photos. He looked pissed off."

"Yeah. So did your parents. They knew that it was all over as soon as Peter started talking about the photos. And did you hear the jury murmuring?" Ennis rolled off him, stretching and sighing.

"I sure did. Looks like things are gonna go our way." Ennis leaned over and stroked Jack's cheek; Jack turned his face into Ennis's palm, smiling. "God...I love you so much that it hurts."

"But it's a good kind of pain, right?" Jack asked, eyes open and trusting. Ennis smiled.

"The best. Wouldn't trade it for anything, you know. Not even for being negative."

Jack stared at him, wondering if he'd heard right. "You mean that?" he asked; he so wanted to believe that but he'd never expected it.

Ennis nodded. "I do. I'd rather have this than be negative. Ever since I got infected...I feel like it's brought us closer together, in a way. You know? Not just sex without a barrier, but...like we're the same now. I feel everything that you do and I understand you better now that I'm like you."

Jack sat up. "Ennis...I don't know what to say. I never wanted you to be like me. You were perfect before, but now..."

"I don't wanna hear you putting yourself down," Ennis told him, also sitting up and curling an arm around his shoulders. "Jack, I meant what I just said. I know it won't be easy, especially if it turns into AIDS for one of us. But we've got each other, and we're strong. That's all I need to know. We can look after each other."

"And...you meant it about understanding me better?" Jack asked, looking unsurely at him.

"I did. I really feel like that, Jack. When I was negative, there were times when I felt as if I didn't understand what you were going through. But now...I know what it's like. We're the same now, Jack. And we're fighting for everybody like us."

Jack smiled and kissed him, feeling his heart lift; Ennis continued to surprise him no matter how long they had been together.

* * *

All too soon, they were back in the courtroom and the trial was about to resume. Everybody knew that the jury's decision would be coming today, but they had been informed that the judge wished for Ennis's father to take the stand with regards to the stolen documents. This gave Ennis and Jack some hope that this meant the judge was seeing through the plot that Ennis's parents had tried to carry out, and that Jack would be declared not guilty.

They had taken their seats in the courtroom and were waiting for the judge to arrive; Jack had noticed how Ennis's parents were looking a lot less sure of themselves than yesterday, and he smirked to himself. He had honestly expected them to pull some kind of trick between yesterday and now, but they had heard nothing. He wasn't sure that they even could, because he knew there was nothing on him that they could exploit.

"Things are a lot better for us than yesterday," Peter said to him, going over his files as they waited. "We've done everything we can as far as I can see."

Jack nodded. "They sure don't look too good," he replied, nodding to Ennis's parents. They were quiet and no longer giving Jack evil looks; it seemed as if they knew they had lost. Peter shrugged.

"If you ask me, they brought this upon themselves. They've clearly underestimated you and Ennis." Jack smiled; they were a force to be reckoned with when they worked together.

They were asked to stand and the judge walked in; Jack tried to gauge his expression but this was impossible; there was no way of knowing anything until he spoke.

"Resuming the trial of John C. Twist Junior from yesterday. I have looked over the photographs of Keith Del Mar stealing Ennis Del Mar's medical records and have called for the former to take the stand. Once this is done, I will ask the jury to make their decision based on what they have seen and heard."

Ennis waited with bated breath; his father had already admitted to stealing the records so what now? Was he going to say why? Surely if he did, this would prove Jack's innocence even further.

The judge cleared his throat and nodded at Peter, who stood up. "Calling Keith Del Mar to the stand." Ennis's father got up and walked to the stand; Jack could tell that he was extremely nervous.

After swearing to tell the truth, Keith looked warily at Peter as he started to question him. "Mr Del Mar, you have already admitted to stealing your son's medical records on September 22nd of this year. Can you please tell the court why you did this?"

Keith sighed. "My wife and I...we've only ever wanted the best for our son. When he told us about his partner having HIV, we couldn't just stand by and watch him ruin his life. We knew back then that we weren't going to change his mind, so we allowed him to cut us off. And when he told us that he had caught the virus...it was extremely difficult to take in. We were angry at Twist for doing this to our son."

"And you wished to see him punished by whatever means?" Peter asked, and Keith nodded.

"It was an impulse, to see if they had anything in the car that would incriminate Twist. My wife didn't know until after they had gone. We knew that if the infection had been on purpose then it would be attempted murder."

"Mr Del Mar, that would only be the case if your son had not consented to unprotected intercourse with his husband. But looking at the relationship they have, I think we can agree that this would not be the case. Did you know, on any level, that this was not attempted murder?"

Keith looked down. "Yeah, we did. We just wanted to see him punished for doing this to our son."

Ennis swallowed past a lump in his throat; he wished that his parents could have taken this differently. Deciding to cut them off for good after this case would be the hardest thing he'd ever had to do, but it was for Jack. He didn't want them near the man he loved.

"So...you knew that by itself, an accusation of attempted murder by your son-in-law had no substance, which was why you stole the records. So this proves that you knew it was not the case; you knew that Jack Twist was innocent of the crime he is being tried for. This was a desperate attempt to see an innocent man punished. End of questioning, Your Honour," he directed to the judge, who nodded and told Keith to stand down. It was clear to Jack that there was nothing more to say.

"Very well, Mr Thompson. Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, you have seen and heard everything of this case, including a confession from Mr Del Mar Sr of having stolen the records and his motivation for it. There is nothing more to be heard, so I now ask you to make your final decision as to the fate of John C. Twist, the accused. We will take a ten-minute break, and when we come back I will ask you for your verdict." He banged the gavel and left the room; Jack sank back into his chair.

"Well...I didn't think I'd hear him admit it," he sighed. "That was interesting."

"Sure was. Between you and me, Jack...there's no chance of them finding you guilty. Not with everything they've heard and seen."

Jack smiled at him. "Hope not." He turned and looked up at Ennis, who nodded at him. He grinned back as everybody started to leave the room.

He and Ennis were kept apart once more, but hopefully this would be the last time. When they went back in, all of this would be over and they would be left to get on with their lives.

* * *

When they were back inside, it didn't take long for everybody to get settled and the judge cleared his throat.

"John C. Twist Jr, you stand accused of the attempted murder of your husband Ennis Del Mar via transmission of the HIV virus. If you are found guilty of this charge, you will be sentenced to eight years in prison without parole. If you are found not guilty, these charges will go down as false accusations and the case will be closed forever."

Jack nodded, knowing that Ennis was just as nervous as him; he wished they could communicate telepathically.

_I love you, _he thought with Ennis in mind, unaware that Ennis was thinking the same thing.

"Have the jury reached a verdict with which they all agree?" asked the judge, and a woman with short brown hair stood up.

"Yes, Your Honour," she replied, and he nodded.

"Very well. Do you find Mr Twist guilty or not guilty of the charges he faces?"

Jack closed his eyes, bracing himself.

"Not guilty," came the same woman's voice, and Jack's eyes flew open. If he hadn't been sitting down, he would have needed to now.

Ennis fell back in his seat and let out a breath; everybody on Jack's side felt overwhelming relief. "Thank God," he breathed.

"Very well. Mr Twist, you are cleared of all charges brought upon you, and as of now you are a free man. Mr and Mrs Del Mar," he added, turning to them; they seemed to shrink in their seats. "I must impress upon you the seriousness of your own crimes of theft and of wasting court time by making accusations that you knew were false." He glared at them. "If your son wishes to press charges against you for theft then he will be quite justified to do so." Then he banged the gavel one last time. "Case is closed, court dismissed."

Jack stood up and shook Peter's hand. "Thank you so much for everything. We wouldn't have got this if not for you and I swear...Ennis and I will always be your friends as well as clients."

He smiled back. "It's been a pleasure to help you." He looked over to where Ennis, Karen and Lureen were. "And now I think you'd better brace yourself."

"Why?" Jack turned in time to see Ennis rushing down the steps to him, a grin on his face. He had expected Ennis to pull him into a hug, but he hadn't expected the searing kiss that Ennis gave him upon contact. He made a muffled sound of surprise but soon gathered himself, kissing back enthusiastically and not caring if everybody was watching them.

They broke apart and Jack looked breathless. "Um...wow..."

Ennis cupped his cheeks. "I wanted to do that as soon as she said not guilty. It was only about thirty seconds but it felt like thirty minutes because I...I just wanted to be near you."

Jack smiled back at him, feeling happier than he had in months. It was over, and he wasn't going to jail. He was safe and they could carry on with their lives now. "I can't believe it..."

"I know." Ennis hugged him tightly and then relinquished him to Karen and Lureen. "There's just one thing I have to do before we leave." Jack nodded in understanding and Ennis turned to his parents; he had to do this.

"Congratulations," his mother said stiffly, sparing a nasty look for Jack. "Looks like you got what you wanted."

"Not quite everything," he replied, looking at them sadly. "I wanted one more thing that I'm never gonna have. The unconditional love of my parents. You can't accept who I've chosen to spend my life with, so...that's that. If you can't accept him, then I don't want you in my life. You stole from me, you lied, you tried to have Jack locked up because you didn't like him."

"Ennis?" asked Peter, and he turned. "You are allowed to press charges for theft if you want to. Maybe you should think about that?"

Ennis looked at Jack, whose face remained neutral. He understood that this was Ennis's decision and he would support whatever was chosen.

"To be honest, I did think about it when it started to look like we would win this." He turned back to his parents. "But...I don't think I'm going to."

"Ennis-" Karen started, but Jack stepped forward and took his hand.

"No, I know what he's on about. We've been through all of this stress for months, and to press charges will just add on to that." He squeezed Ennis's hand. "We could end up facing more time in court, more fighting, more stress...we don't need that. If we let it go, we can just leave this alone and we won't have to deal with it anymore."

"Yeah," Ennis agreed, not even surprised that Jack knew what he'd been thinking.

"Are you sure?" asked Peter.

"I am. Jack's right; we need to leave this where it belongs, in the past. I don't want my parents in my life anymore so this is it. We need closure and this is the only way. They'll go back to California and we'll stay here, and that'll be that."

"Alright," Peter agreed; he trusted that Ennis knew what he was doing. He felt as if they should be punished for doing this to Ennis and Jack, but it wasn't his place. This was a personal thing that only Ennis had the right to decide.

"We'll leave, then," said Sarah, stepping back and leaving the courtroom with her husband. Ennis watched them go with a slight hint of sadness that things had to be this way, but he knew it was the best thing for himself and Jack. He sighed and felt Jack slide his arms around him.

"I'm proud of you," he murmured and Ennis smiled.

"I'm doing it for us, Jack...it's the best thing for us and the family we want to have. You're my future." He felt Jack kiss his cheek and saw happiness on the horizon for them, at long last.

* * *

To celebrate their victory, Ennis and Jack invited their group out to their favourite restaurant; the River Café near the bridge. Lureen went shopping for a while to give them some private time and both Karen and Peter returned home for the afternoon, as they would meet up later at the restaurant.

When Ennis and Jack got back to their apartment, they shut the door behind them and turned to each other.

"It's really over," Jack said, still looking stunned. "I just can't believe it." Ennis took his hands.

"I know...we've been waiting for this for months and now everything's gonna be okay. I love you so much, Jack..."

Jack smiled up at him. "You remembered about the CCTV camera, and we might not be standing here together now if it weren't for that. I could be off to jail right now...you saved me, Ennis." He moved in closer, allowing Ennis to embrace him. "Thank you...I love you..."

Ennis hugged him tightly and kissed the top of his head, hearing a slight purr. "Jack...we've got some time to kill before we go out...um..."

Jack grinned and pulled away slightly. "I know what you're asking. I want to, but I wanna save it until tonight, when we're really alone. One of us has to book a table for dinner for later, remember? I wanna wait until we've got the whole night together."

They looked into each other's eyes and Ennis nodded, seeing the sense in Jack's words. "Okay, you're right. Tell you what, then...you just wanna make out?" Jack smirked.

"Alright, as long as you call the restaurant first." Ennis sighed and pulled out his phone, knowing that Jack wouldn't give him anything until it was done.

As he booked the table, he watched Jack settle into the large armchair and stretch out, looking very tempting. He fixed Ennis with those deep blue eyes, knowing exactly what he was doing, and Ennis gulped.

When he was finally done, he joined Jack in the chair and manoeuvred himself so that Jack was sitting in his lap. "You damn tease," he murmured, kissing Jack's neck. Jack grinned.

"Can't help it. I'm feeling like myself again after so long..." Ennis nodded and kissed his nose.

"I know, darlin'. It's like there was this dark cloud hanging over you, and now it's gone." He smiled, stroking Jack's cheek. "I'm glad to see you're gonna be okay, but even if you were still shaken up I'd be here for you."

Jack rested his head in the crook of Ennis's shoulder. "I know you would. And I'm guessing you don't care about when your parents are leaving?"

Ennis sighed. "I won't lie, Jack...it hurts that we couldn't work this out. But they crossed a line by threatening you like that. There was never any chance of us working through this after they had you arrested."

They were silent for a few moments and then started kissing, enjoying the calm after the storm and the promise of a fresh start for all of them.

The afternoon passed by slowly, and they spent most of it in the armchair together. At one point, Jack received a text from Lureen; she had seen Ennis's parents leaving their hotel and clearly heading for the airport. He and Ennis talked about it briefly but then put it out of their minds.

Lureen came back some time later and they started to get ready for their evening out; they were looking forward to celebrating the day they'd had.

The three of them met up with Karen and Peter at the restaurant and they were shown to their table. Jack ordered a bottle of champagne and proposed a toast.

"I just wanna say thank you to everybody at this table. Without you guys I never would have gotten through the last few months. Not just for the court case but...the stuff that came before as well." He glanced at Ennis; now they could truly make peace with the infection. "I've really appreciated your support through this. Peter, you've been a good friend of my side of the family for years and I can't thank you enough for helping us so much. You're gonna be a friend of ours for life, I can tell you that."

Jack looked around the table, and thanked his mother and Lureen for their support as well. Then he took Ennis's hand. "And what can I say about this guy? Only that he's...the best husband anybody could want. He's been brilliant through all of this, holding me up when I couldn't do it myself." He smiled at Ennis, whose cheeks had turned pink. "I love you, bud."

"Love you too, Jack," Ennis replied, grinning and blushing even more when Jack kissed his cheek and clearing his throat. "So...here's to all of us," he added, raising his glass.

"To us," they echoed, raising their own. Ennis and Jack glanced at each other before drinking, a silent understanding passing between them.

The meal was as delicious as it ever was here, and they had a good time. They liked reminiscing about the moment when the photos had been produced, especially for the looks on Ennis's parents' faces when it had happened. Ennis looked around the table and realised that he didn't miss his parents too much. He would always wish that things could have been different, but as it was he was much happier without them. He had a loving family right here, even though none of them were blood relations. He was married to Jack, which made Karen his mother-in-law. Peter and Lureen weren't related to either of them, but that didn't matter; they felt like family too. And Ennis was certain that the pair of them had taken an interest in each other; maybe Lureen might be moving over here one day after all.

He caught Jack smiling at him and nudged him gently, knowing that Jack understood. They could move on now, and they were going to make the most of it.

* * *

As soon as Ennis and Jack got home, they were all over each other. Lureen had brought an overnight bag with her to dinner, and had decided to stay with Karen in the house on Long Island for tonight; she knew that her friends were bound to be making a lot of noise. As much as she supported their relationship, she knew that hearing them having sex would traumatise her; they were her best friends after all.

The door was locked behind them and Jack pulled Ennis close by the shirt. "Ennis...I wanna be inside you," he breathed. Ennis trembled with arousal.

"You sure you're up for that?" he asked hopefully. Jack took his hand and guided it to his crotch.

"What d'you think?" he whispered, grinning. Ennis kissed him and they started walking to the bedroom, eager to make their bodies connect once more. They had a lot to celebrate tonight and they would certainly do so.

Jack made quick work of Ennis's buttons, throwing his shirt to the floor and then removing his own. They kissed fiercely and pressed their chests together, always needing more. Shoes were kicked off and they sank down onto the bed, straining for each other. "Come on," Jack breathed, undoing his jeans and nuzzling at Ennis's neck .Soon they were naked and in the middle of the bed, a tangle of arms and legs. "God, I want you..."

They shuffled up the bed and Ennis lay on his back, head on the pillow. He gazed up at Jack with both lust and love. "Jack...it's all yours," he said softly, and he could see in Jack's eyes just how much he was wanted. He shivered as Jack reached for the lube and coated it over himself. "Please...come on..." he breathed, needing that contact more than anything else.

Jack spread his legs further apart and settled in between them, biting his lip and grinning. "You want me to fuck you?" he asked lightly, trailing a hand down Ennis's stomach in a way that would drive him crazy. It was a sensitive area when Ennis was aroused, which he knew very well.

"Yeah," Ennis replied, trying not to yell out. Without an answer, Jack pushed in with one smooth stroke, taking Ennis hard and causing little lights to pop in front of his eyes. "Jack! Oh God..."

"Just relax," Jack whispered in his ear, hard and ready to make love to this man. He owed Ennis so much and this was just the start of showing him how grateful he was. "Gonna be good."

He started off slowly, allowing Ennis to get used to the feeling and work his way past the pain. Once that part was over it would be so enjoyable and they both knew it; that was why they kept going even when in pain at the start. It would be worth it in the end.

"Jack," Ennis croaked out, thinking that he would lose his mind if Jack didn't stop teasing him. Jack wasn't even touching him except in that one place; his hands were on the pillow and purposefully keeping away from the one place where he knew Ennis wanted him to touch him.

"What d'you want?" Jack breathed in his ear, nipping it. "Tell me what you want."

"Touch me, please," Ennis groaned, lifting his hips even as Jack thrust steadily into him. Jack grinned and grabbed hold of him, sliding his hand up and down slowly and continuing to search for the prostate; he had an idea of where it was but he always enjoyed postponing that moment because it made things last longer. He wanted this to be as good as possible for Ennis, just like Ennis did when he was on top. "Oh..."

Jack started thrusting harder and faster, finding the sweet spot and using every trick he knew to make Ennis moan. He loved the sounds dropping from Ennis's mouth and was dimly aware of making his own as they rocked together, skin slapping together. He could feel Ennis leaking between them and knew he was very close, about to explode and drive them both over the edge. "Come for me," he murmured in Ennis's ear, and that did it. Jack grinned when he felt sticky fluid hitting his stomach and planted his knees, thrusting a few more times until he was there himself.

He collapsed onto Ennis, panting heavily like he'd just run a marathon without stopping. "Oh, Ennis...that was..."

"Yeah," Ennis gasped, eyes fixed on the ceiling. That had been something else, and he was very glad to see that Jack was back to his usual self. Everything would be okay now. "I love you..."

"Right back at you," Jack sighed, pulling out and relaxing on top of him. "Been a while since we were like that, huh?"

"Sure has. I missed that..." Ennis wrapped his arms around Jack, closing his eyes and still breathing deeply. "Missed doing it when we didn't have anything to worry about at the back of our minds. We don't have to worry anymore."

"Yeah..." Jack tiredly pressed his lips to Ennis's chest and rolled off him, stretching. They pulled the quilt up from underneath and threw it over themselves, immediately moving in close and looking at each other. "You okay?" Ennis knew he was only partly asking about his physical wellbeing.

"I'm fine," he answered, taking Jack's hand underneath the quilt and squeezing. "I really am. I've got you, and Karen and Lureen and Peter. I'm gonna be just fine with you guys, but especially with you, Jack. If I was your rock through the last few months, then you're gonna be mine while I adjust to being estranged from my parents."

Jack nodded. "Of course I will. We're always there for each other, Ennis; that's what a marriage is about. I just wanna see you happy."

Ennis smiled and kissed him. "You make me happy, Jack." They curled up together and let their eyes fall shut, still holding hands through the night.


	23. Chapter 23

_Author's notes_

_Hey guys! Unfortunately, this is the last full chapter. The epilogue will be posted tomorrow and my new story will start the day after. This story is mostly finished, but there is one last surprise for our boys._

_Kathryn xxx_

* * *

**Chapter 23**

_November 16th, 2012_

By Friday, things had settled back down to normal. Ennis's parents had gone back to California and he was sure that he had seen the last of them. He would cope without them, mostly because he had Jack and they were going to be okay. That was the main thought for him to hold on to.

Karen was back at home today and Lureen had also gone back to California, after getting Ennis and Jack to promise that they would call her if anything else came up.

They were going to call Claire from the adoption agency to let her know how the trial had gone, but they were preoccupied right now. The pair of them were sitting in the wicker chairs on the balcony and talking, enjoying the unusually warm weather. They truly felt on top of the world right now.

"We've had a damn good stroke of luck, haven't we?" Jack asked, stretching. He felt liberated, like nothing was holding him back anymore. He could enjoy his life now.

"We sure have," Ennis agreed, smiling over at him. Jack was back to his old self and he was glad to see the back of his parents. He would never forgive them for what they had done to his Jack. "I'm glad to see you're doing better, darlin'."

"Me too." Jack got up and settled himself in Ennis's lap, grinning widely at him. He had a mischievous streak that Ennis had always loved, and he'd missed that. It usually came up when Jack was hitting on him and wanted sex, but sometimes just when he wanted to be close. "Hey..."

Ennis sighed when he felt Jack's lips touch his, feeling warm throughout his entire body as if he'd sunk into a hot bath. Jack just felt like home to him. He was surprised at how well they had gone back to normal, but very happy about it. He'd been keeping an eye on Jack today but he seemed just fine, so he wasn't worried.

"You sure you're okay? With your parents being gone?" Jack asked, looking into his eyes. Ennis nodded and laced his fingers together in the small of Jack's back. He liked being close to Jack like this, when it was just the two of them.

"I really am. You think I made the right choice, not pressing charges?"

"Yeah, I think you did. It's like I said...if you had, then they'd have to stay here until it was settled, and we might have run into them at some point. And we'd get dragged through court all over again...we don't want that."

"I know." Ennis smiled when Jack lowered his head to his shoulder, snuggling closer to him. He sighed. "You know...it's times like this when I envy you, Jack. You've just got your mom now, but when your dad died at least he loved you. Your mom still loves you...and they wouldn't do something like this to me. I've got two living parents and I don't want anything to do with them."

Jack stayed silent, thinking it over. He knew how much it hurt Ennis to admit it, and he too wished that things could have been different. He wanted Ennis to have everything, just like Ennis wanted for him.

"Jack...I want you to know that I don't regret meeting you, ever. I don't regret anything about our relationship, not even the time we broke up because it made me realise how much I needed you."

"Yeah," Jack sighed, squeezing him. "You're right about that. I don't regret anything either...except the infection." That was one thing he wished he could reverse. When on earth where they going to find a cure?

Ennis looked down at him, rubbing his back. "I don't. It brought us closer, Jack...we're better off for it, I reckon."

"Maybe." Just then, Ennis's phone went off in his pocket and Jack rose up slightly. "You'd better get that." Ennis nodded and got his phone out, seeing the name on the screen. "It's Claire from the agency." He pressed the phone to his ear with Jack watching him. "Hello?"

"Hi Ennis, it's Claire. I hope you don't mind the disturbance."

"No, it's okay. What's up?"

"I just wanted to ask how the trial went, if you don't mind telling me. Or is it not over yet?"

"It's over, and we were gonna call you. They found him not guilty. It's all over with now."

"Thank God for that. We were all sure that everything would be okay but I'm glad to hear it."

"Yeah. So does that go into the report or what?"

"It would have to, but it would be very clear that it's a false accusation. Everything will be fine."

"Great. So, um...I don't suppose you've heard anything?" he asked hopefully.

"We haven't been able to do anything just yet without the trial results. But now we have them, we can start looking into potential adoptees. I'm sure there's a baby that you two will make great parents for."

"Thanks, Claire. Let us know as soon as you hear anything, okay?"

"I will. Bye, Ennis. And give my best to Jack."

"Yep, bye." He hung up and put his phone back into his pocket. "Well, she's happy about the results."

Jack smiled at him. "Great. Did she say if they might have a baby available for us yet?"

"She said they couldn't look without knowing the results, but now they do so they can." He squeezed Jack tightly. "We could have a baby soon, bud."

Jack bit his lip. "Yeah, maybe. Oh God...we could be parents, and really soon. Could be just a few weeks, right?"

"I guess. You ready to be a dad?" Jack nodded.

"Yeah. I'm scared to death about it, but it's exciting. I wanna have a family with you, Ennis. I really do..."

"So do I." Ennis brought Jack's lips back to his and they resumed kissing. It was a beautiful day and things were going their way again. They had everything they wanted, or would soon enough.

* * *

That night, Ennis and Jack were cooling down after some very satisfying sex that had left them a little sore but very happy. Jack knew he'd have a hitch in his step tomorrow but didn't care. For them, sex was far more than just a physical act. It was about their love for each other. "That was good," he sighed, stretching out on his stomach. Ennis smiled at him; they said that every time and he knew Jack was right. Every time seemed to be the best for them.

"Sure was. I love you, darlin'...so much..." he murmured, stroking Jack's cheek.

"Same to you, baby." Jack thought for a moment. "You know...I can't stop thinking about this baby we're gonna adopt. I'm wondering if it's gonna be a boy or girl...what colour eyes it has, the hair...even if it's got a birthmark." He smiled. "I just...I'm really looking forward to it."

"Me too," Ennis replied, shuffling closer and kissing his shoulder blade. Jack was warm and relaxed, and Ennis just loved this post-coital time when they could reflect on what they had. "I kind of wish that they were gonna have all their grandparents, though."

"Yeah..." Jack looked at him sadly. Ennis seemed to be doing okay with being estranged from his parents, but sometimes it got to him and Jack knew it. He turned onto his back and opened his arms. "Come here, sweetheart." He nodded encouragingly, wanting to hold Ennis and make him feel better.

Ennis looked at him before moving in close. "You don't call me that often..." Jack shrugged and hugged him tightly.

"Felt like it might be good. Might make you feel better." He rubbed Ennis's back, the same way that Ennis did for him when their positions were reversed. "Hmm?"

"That's good," Ennis said softly, feeling himself start to relax under Jack's touch. It was gentle but firm enough to let him know that Jack was trying to take care of him. "Mmm..."

Jack nuzzled his curls and was rewarded with a purr. "Baby...you've been great to me these past few months. I swear, I...I've been a mess through this whole thing, from the infection all the way to the trial. I was all over the place, and someone else might have left me because it was too hard to cope. But you didn't, Ennis. You stood by me no matter what and...that means the world to me."

Ennis kissed his chest. "Jack...I didn't just stand by you because I'm your husband and I have to, but I did it because I wanted to. I love you and I hated to see you so hurt and beaten. I just wanted to take the pain away from you..."

They embraced each other silently, enjoying the peace and calm of the night. Ennis felt himself becoming aroused again with the close proximity and wandering hands; it wasn't often that they could go twice on the same night but he wasn't about to waste an opportunity. "Jack...?"

"I can feel that digging into my hip," Jack replied, smirking. It was clear to him what Ennis wanted. When one of them was hard, it was very difficult to do anything except relieve it. Giving each other what they needed was a lot easier than trying to make it go down. "You wanna? I don't think I can take it again so soon..."

"Maybe we could do that rubbing thing?" Ennis suggested. "Remember?" Jack nodded.

"Sure. Come here..." He rolled them both over until Ennis was on his back, gazing up at him with wide eyes. He hadn't expected that but wasn't complaining; he secretly loved it when Jack took control over him. "You ready?"

Ennis grinned. "Hell yeah." He locked his arms and legs around Jack, who pulled him close and got into position. He could feel Ennis's pulse beating through his throbbing erection, right next to his own, and bit his lip. They wouldn't last long at this rate.

He started rocking their hips together, moving forwards and backwards in a smooth rhythm and watching Ennis's face. During sex, he sometimes looked as if he'd been transported outside of himself. That showed Jack just how much he enjoyed making love with him and how it made him feel. "You feel good?" he whispered, and Ennis nodded with his eyes closed. It felt wonderful, even without penetration. This was just as good.

"Yeah..." he sighed, his head falling to one side on the pillow. Jack took the opportunity to kiss his neck as they moved against each other, trailing one hand down Ennis's chest and taking both of them in hand. He grinned when Ennis bucked underneath him, seeing how close he was. "Jack..."

"Come for me, baby," he breathed in his lover's ear, gritting his teeth when he felt himself starting to release. His hand moved faster and everything became a blur as they came together, straining and crying out.

Jack collapsed onto Ennis, breathing heavily. "Oh...Ennis...that was..."

"Yeah..." They were silent for a few moments, and then Ennis spoke again. "I love you so much..."

Jack smiled and hugged him. "Right back at you. Things are gonna be okay for us, aren't they?"

"Sure are. You and me...and this baby we're gonna adopt. It's gonna be fine. We're gonna be a family and nobody will ever tear us apart, you hear me?"

"I do," Jack replied, nuzzling his chest. "I just can't live without you, Ennis...and I don't want to. Tried it once and thought I'd die of a broken heart."

Ennis reached for his hand. "Shh...don't think about it, Jack. It's all over now and we've moved on. I'm sorry for that, but...we can't dwell on it, right?"

"Yeah, you're right." Jack rolled off him and tucked in close, staring at him in the dark. "Can't wait for us to be parents. We're gonna be great."

"We are," Ennis agreed, wrapping an arm around Jack and closing his eyes. Jack smiled and followed suit, hoping to dream about the future.

* * *

_November 18th, 2012_

Sunday started out as an ordinary day. Both Ennis and Jack were looking forward to going back to work after their week off, and Jack knew that the people he spoke to would want to know how the trial had gone. He knew that Sam in particular would want to know, given how he could just as easily go through the same thing one day and had the same fears that Jack did.

They were making lunch together and copping a feel as they passed each other in the kitchen, still on a high from the results of the trial. Ennis was adjusting fairly well to not having his parents in his life, and he knew it was partly due to Jack's presence. His unwavering love had made Ennis believe that he would be alright.

For his part, Jack was relieved that he wouldn't be going to prison. It was one thing that he feared so much, and he was happy that it wasn't going to happen. He could stay here with Ennis and live out their lives. He did wonder if at some point, Ennis's parents would try again to have him locked away, but he knew how unlikely it was. They wouldn't want to risk wasting court time again; that could see the pair of them being locked away.

"What are you thinking about over there?" Ennis asked, nudging him and shaking him out of his reverie. Jack shook his head.

"Just about your parents. I'm glad to see that you're doing okay, bud." Ennis smiled at him.

"I'm fine, mainly because I've got you. I'll be okay." Jack smiled back and they carried on making lunch, enjoying their time together. Life was settling down and they were moving forward like they had wanted to for weeks.

When they had sat down and were starting to eat, Ennis heard his phone ringing. "It's Claire," he said to Jack, exchanging a look with him. Jack had stopped eating. "Claire?"

"Hey, Ennis. How are you and Jack doing?"

"We're fine, thanks. Um...what can I do for you?" he asked nervously. He hoped he knew why she was calling out of the blue like this.

"Well, I've got some great news for you. There's a baby in the system that needs a home."

"There is?" he replied, grinning at Jack who seemed to understand. "Um...okay. Can I put the speakerphone on so Jack can hear?" She agreed and he laid the phone on the table. "Okay."

"It's a boy, just two months old. His mother died shortly after the birth but she got in touch with us beforehand."

"Really?" Jack asked. "Did she...know she was dying or just didn't want to raise him?"

"Actually, she knew. She had a brain aneurysm and didn't have long left anyway. I think the pain and stress of childbirth caused it to burst, and she died less than an hour after he was born."

"Oh God," Jack said, feeling terrible for her, this woman that they didn't even know. The world could be very cruel to people who didn't deserve it. "So..."

"The thing is, she told us that she was a lesbian and wanted her child to go to a same-sex couple, because she was aware of how difficult it was for those adopting to be chosen as parents. It's not often that a same-sex couple will be chosen unless they have a connection with at least one biological parent beforehand. But this woman asked us to do this and I am a firm believer in carrying out final wishes."

Ennis nodded. "Well, I think that's a great thing. So...when can we come and see him?"

"We can bring him to the agency in two days. I know you guys are off on Tuesdays."

"Yeah, and we'll tell our bosses that things are changing now, so we can arrange the new shifts," Jack told her. "We can come in on Tuesday."

"Good. I think you'll like him; he's a very calm baby if you ask me. And at this young age, you'll get to experience a lot of the firsts, you know?"

Ennis smiled at Jack, thinking about what it would be like to raise this child. "Okay. What time?"

"Shall we say three?" she replied, and they agreed. "You will have to sign some forms so we can get the adoption certificate drawn up, but that's a formality. Considering what the mother wanted and how you two have a strong application, it's a given that this baby will be going home with you."

"Thanks, Claire," Ennis said to her, and she bid them goodbye before hanging up. He grinned across the table at Jack. "We're gonna be parents..."

"We sure are." Jack leaned over the table and kissed him, feeling his heart soar. "I can't believe it...we won the trial three days ago and now this. I just..."

"Yeah." Ennis looked fondly at him, knowing how much this meant to him. They were going to be good fathers.

After lunch, Ennis and Jack went into the spare room and started talking about how to turn it into a nursery. They would call their employers this afternoon, and that would allow them tomorrow to get everything together. Now that they were certain of having a baby given to them, they could go ahead with planning. It would only take a few hours to paint the room, and if they acted quickly then they would have enough time.

"Can't wait to get started," Jack said as they looked at paint samples. They had chosen to have the room painted in blue, and were trying to choose a shade. They knew they could redecorate as their future son grew older, or maybe one day they might even move. When Jack had first referred to the baby as their son, Ennis had looked at him and felt happiness running through him. It was true; this baby would be their child and they would be a family.

* * *

A little later, Ennis and Jack were watching TV on the sofa together. They had decided on what paint they wanted and would buy it tomorrow, and Jack had been looking at baby stores on his laptop, trying to decide how they were going to decorate the nursery. He was starting to feel excited about the whole thing now that it was going to happen, and he knew that Ennis was too. It was a scary prospect, but it was something that they both wanted and he knew it.

Claire hadn't mentioned if the baby had a name, but that could wait until Tuesday. If he didn't then they would choose one themselves but they would certainly keep a name if one had been chosen by the mother; that was the least they felt they could do. That poor woman had run out of luck and they knew just how lucky they were to be in this position.

"I just can't wait until Tuesday," Jack said as they sat together. "Wonder what he looks like? Bet he's got blue eyes; they're the most common."

"Yeah, probably. Wouldn't it be good if he had a blue and a brown? Some people do...and it'd be like us." He'd only ever seen one person with this, and it was strange but he could get used to it.

Jack grinned. "Yeah. Then he really would be like our son. But I know we'll love him no matter what." That was true enough, given how they had fought to get to this point.

"Definitely. I do feel sorry for his mom, though. Knowing that she wouldn't see her son grow up. Maybe we can find out her name and do something. Find out where she was buried and take some flowers." Jack smiled up at him, pleased to see what a wonderful man he had married. Ennis often showed this caring and sweet nature, and he enjoyed seeing it.

"That's really sweet, Ennis. And maybe we could contact her family and get some photos to show the little guy when he's older." That seemed fair to him, given how it wasn't the mother's fault she couldn't be there to raise her son.

"And we'll tell him about her. I wonder what the deal is with the father? If she was a lesbian, maybe she had a partner and used artificial insemination like we were going to. So then why couldn't the partner or father raise him?"

"We don't know what happened," Jack said quietly, a terrible thought occurring to him. "Ennis...you think maybe...?" He didn't have to say it; Ennis could see it in his eyes. They didn't like to talk about that, because it hit very close to home, so always avoided it if they could.

"I don't know," he replied honestly. "But it doesn't matter. We're gonna love this baby anyway, aren't we?"

"Yeah, of course we will," Jack replied, nodding in agreement. "We probably don't wanna know what happened," he added, resting his head on Ennis's shoulder for comfort. "Sometimes it's best not to know."

They fell silent, thinking about the mother. Whatever the circumstances, they knew that it probably wasn't her fault. And it certainly wasn't the baby's fault, so they would just put that out of their minds and focus on what they did know. The unnamed mother probably did want to raise the baby herself but had evidently been unable to do so; that alone got to them and made them certain that they could do this. They wanted to raise this child, not just for them and him but also for her; this poor woman who felt like some kind of kindred spirit because of who she had been. They were both keen to support one of their own, as they put it, in whichever way they could.

Jack's phone rang a few minutes later; it was Karen. "Hey, Mom."

"Hi, sweetie. Just calling to see if you two are okay." He knew that she was still recovering after the stress of the trial, but that she would be fine.

"We're great. We've got some news for you," he replied, grinning at Ennis.

"What is it?" she asked, and he took a deep breath.

"You're gonna be a Grandma. The adoption agency called earlier; there's a little boy that needs adopting, just two months old."

"Oh, Jack...that's wonderful!" she replied, sounding very happy. "Do you know about the biological parents?"

"His mom died just after giving birth. She had a brain aneurysm and couldn't cope with childbirth afterwards. He's been in the system ever since. She was a lesbian and wanted her baby to go to a same-sex couple."

"Oh...the poor girl. That's a real shame. What of the father?"

Jack glanced at Ennis. "We don't know. I don't think she told them anything about him...and we're not sure we wanna know anyway."

"Good point. Well, I'm sure you two will be the kind of parents she wanted for her son. Do you know anything else about her?"

"No, but we're gonna try and find out. Like...her name, where she's buried. We thought we'd try and get some photos to show him when he's older. What d'you think?"

"I think that's a very selfless and noble thing to do for this poor woman," she agreed, sounding very proud of them both. "Let me know if you need any help with that."

"We will. We're gonna go shopping tomorrow for some things to furnish the nursery. You wanna meet up for lunch?"

"I would love that. Text me when you're walking around tomorrow so we can find each other."

"Okay. See you tomorrow, Mom. Bye." He hung up and smiled at Ennis. "We're meeting my mom for lunch, I guess."

"Sure," Ennis replied, putting an arm around him. "So...tomorrow. Have you got the names of the stores we're gonna look through?"

"Yep, put it in my wallet earlier," Jack told him. "Got the addresses down too." Ennis nodded and kissed his forehead before they settled down again.

* * *

_November 20th, 2012_

On Tuesday, Ennis and Jack made their way to the adoption agency to meet their new son. They were both extremely nervous but felt prepared. They had managed to get the nursery ready yesterday, having worked all day and only taking breaks so they could eat. The paint was of a light blue colour, and they had used white on the ceiling to make it look like clouds in the sky.

There was a crib and a changing table all set up, with plenty of toys that they knew the baby would love to play with when he was older. They had needed some advice on age-appropriate toys but they felt more confident by now. Both of them knew that they could call Karen at any time to ask for her advice and there was always the internet at their disposal.

"I'm really nervous," Jack admitted as they approached the building. "I mean...this little guy is gonna change our lives forever and..."

"I know," Ennis soothed, smiling at him and squeezing his hand. "But we're gonna be great parents, bud. Come on." They entered the building and were directed to the waiting area.

Soon enough, Claire entered the room. "Hey, you guys. You ready to meet your new baby?"

"Yeah," Jack replied, grinning as they stood up. She led them through the building to another room and told them to wait there. "I'll just go and get him from the nursery, okay?" They nodded and waited, full of anticipation.

They didn't have to wait long. Claire soon came back with a white bundle in her arms. Ennis felt Jack squeeze his hand very tightly, his eyes fixed on it. She was smiling at them as she brought the baby over.

"Okay, you guys. This is James," she said to them, handing the baby to Jack. He held out his arms, shaking slightly but with an expression of wonder on his face.

"James..." he repeated, taking the bundle and holding it close like his mother had described to him. Within the white blankets was a small baby boy, fast asleep. His hair, just starting to grow, was a light brown colour. He was absolutely beautiful and Jack couldn't believe how lucky they were. "Oh my God..."

"Congratulations, you two," Claire said to them. "I'll just go and get the forms that you have to sign, okay?" She left them alone with their new baby, and Jack looked up at Ennis who was peering down at their son.

"Isn't he amazing?" Jack said softly, grinning at him. Ennis saw the love in his eyes and knew that his Jack was truly back; they were happy again.

"He sure is," Ennis agreed, softly stroking the baby's cheek. To their surprise, a pair of green eyes opened up and blinked at them. They hadn't expected a colour like that. "Oh..."

"Hey there," Jack murmured, putting his hand close to James, who grasped his finger with one tiny hand. "He's got a good grip. Hey, buddy..."

The baby looked up at them both and they could swear that they saw a smile form, but it wasn't easy to tell. They heard a soft gurgling sound and the baby closed its eyes again. Jack grinned. "Oh God...Ennis..."

"I know, darlin'," Ennis replied, kissing his temple. Claire returned and smiled at the sight.

"What d'you think, then?" she asked, the papers in her hand. They grinned back.

"He's beautiful," Jack replied, taking to this like a duck to water. She nodded.

"Okay. You both need to sign these forms, so you should take it in turns. Ennis, do you want to go first?" He agreed and moved over to the desk while Jack gently rocked their new son in his arms; he'd fallen asleep again. "So is there anything you need to know? His birthday is September 15th, and all the information about the birth in in these papers."

"We wanted to know about the mother," Ennis told her as he signed his name. "After what you told us, we want to make some kind of gesture."

"Sure. Her name was Francesca Warren, and she told us that everybody called her Frankie for short. She was twenty years old, very young. She didn't tell us how she got pregnant but I got the feeling it was a sensitive subject. Much too young to die the way she did."

Ennis finished signing and Jack handed James over to him so that he could sign too. Ennis took hold of their new son and smiled when he saw the baby stretch in his sleep. "We wanted to know where she's buried and where she lived too, if that's okay. We thought that if we got photos of her, we could show them to him when he's older."

"Okay. I can tell you that she's from New York. She lived with her parents in Queens and was buried in Maple Grove Cemetery. I can get her parents' address for you and I'll call you as soon as I find out."

"Thank you," Jack replied as he finished. "So is that everything?" He really wanted to get their new son home so that they could fuss over him. Karen was bound to love him.

"Yeah. I'll get the adoption certificate drawn up for you but for now, you can take him home. The papers will prove your adoption until you get the certificate. Everything you need is in this file."

They nodded and bid her goodbye before starting to slowly walk out of the building. They did have a stroller and would use it when they took him out. Ennis was still holding James and Jack was grinning like a Cheshire Cat; he had everything he'd ever wanted.

"I love you," he suddenly said as they walked, looking up at Ennis. His partner kissed him softly and nuzzled his face.

"Love you too, Jack. Let's get our baby home." They walked down the street together as a family, looking forward to the future now more than ever.


	24. Epilogue

_Author's notes_

_Hey guys! Here's the epilogue. I hope you've enjoyed this story; it wasn't easy to write in certain places but hopefully it's paid off. My next story is a short one, just ten chapters with each one to be posted every day. It will be called One More Miracle. I have another big story coming up after that which I am really looking forward to writing, and I'll tell you more when the first story finishes._

_Happy reading!_

_Kathryn xxx_

* * *

**Epilogue**

After Ennis and Jack took their new son home, they were soon bombarded with gifts from their friends and relatives, with the exception of Ennis's parents. They both knew that there was no point in worrying about that, so they forgot about it and just concentrated on what they had now. They had to focus on this because their new baby was depending on them.

"Isn't he something else?" Ennis asked as they watched him in his crib in the nursery. He was looking up at them with his wide eyes, taking in everything he was seeing. They thought of him as the cutest baby they'd ever seen, even if they were a little biased. Karen had told them that every new parent felt that way, and they could see why.

"He sure is," Jack replied, holding Ennis's arms around him. "Our baby boy...and we're a family..." He couldn't quite believe it sometimes; when he'd first been infected he'd feared that he would never have this. He owed it to Ennis.

Their bosses had given them two months of paternity leave, and they would start their new shifts when they returned. They had fallen in love with their new son and were happier than ever; it had been the best idea they'd ever had. They hadn't been married for long when they had first talked about it, but they had been right; in the time since their relationship had grown even more and they were ready for a baby now.

Karen was pleased to be a grandmother and doted on James; his last name had been tricky for them to decide on. Ultimately, they decided that his full name would be James Warren Twist-Del Mar, with his mother's last name being his middle. Ennis and Jack felt as if it was the best way to remember her. They weren't sure why they felt like this about a woman they had never known, but since she was the woman who had brought their son into the world they felt as if they owed it to her.

Claire was able to give them the address of Francesca's parents in Queens, and the pair of them took James to the cemetery where she had been buried. Her grave was under a willow tree, slightly apart from the rest. It was made of beautiful marble, which showed them that she had at least had a good relationship with her parents.

_Francesca Jane Warren_

_August 20th 1992 - September 15th 2012_

_Beloved daughter, friend and mother_

_Our Frankie_

"God," Jack sighed, looking down at the grave as he laid the flowers down. They had brought her a bouquet of roses, the New York state flower. They were of a dark pink colour, which they had thought she might have liked. "Poor girl...she didn't deserve that."

"Sure didn't," Ennis agreed as he held James. "We have to go see her parents, Jack. They're his grandparents just as much as Karen is...and maybe they can tell us more about her. I wanna know this stuff and I think it's only fair that James knows it too."

"Yeah," Jack replied, gently touching the headstone and clearing leaves from the engraving. He felt very sorry for this young girl who they hadn't even known. He silently vowed to her that they would take care of her son. They owed her that much and they knew that she would have wanted good parents for her baby.

He and Ennis tracked down her parents and they were very welcoming. They themselves hadn't known how she had become pregnant, which more or less confirmed Ennis and Jack's suspicions if she hadn't told anyone. They really didn't want to know the truth; it might make things harder for them.

Her parents had plenty of stories to tell about their daughter, and showed no signs of homophobia towards her or them. They thanked Ennis and Jack for taking on their grandson and in turn were told that they could remain in touch and see James whenever they wanted. They gave Ennis and Jack some photos of her; she had been a redhead with green eyes, very pretty and clearly full of life. She'd looked so happy and they felt even sorrier for her. Jack wished they had known her.

They took the photos home with them and resumed their lives. They had already celebrated Thanksgiving together, and knew that they had much to be thankful for this year. At the beginning of December, they decorated the apartment for James's first Christmas and took him to the park when it started snowing. When he was older, they could take him sledging and help him to build a snowman; they had some good times to look forward to and couldn't wait to see him grow up.

As Claire had told them, they were starting to experience the firsts. They noticed that he was becoming more aware of everything around him and starting to respond to them. They did research on the development of babies when they got the chance so that they had some idea of what to expect.

They didn't hear anything more from Ennis's parents, but that was to be expected. Ennis sometimes wished that they could be in contact, but he realised that he didn't really need them. He had a loving husband and now a son; everything he'd ever wanted.

Their sex life didn't suffer too much; James hardly ever cried in the night and slept for most of it anyway. They knew that they were very lucky in that respect; Karen had told him about how he used to be the exact opposite. Besides, they felt more in love than ever now that they had a baby and they were raising him as a team.

Christmas came, and they loved seeing the look in James's eyes as he stared at the lights on the tree. His brown hair was growing curly, like a perfect mix of their hair. It truly was as if he was the son of three people, and they definitely didn't want to know about the biological father.

During the cold nights, Ennis and Jack would curl up on the sofa under the afghan with the baby monitor close by, warm and happy.

"I love you so much," Jack murmured, nuzzling his cheek to Ennis's neck. "I swear, I've never been this happy..."

"Me neither," Ennis replied, kissing his forehead. "I love you more than ever now. We're a family..."

Just as they leaned in for a kiss, they heard James through the monitor. He was whimpering and they recognised the sound. "Your turn to change him, bud," Ennis said to Jack, smirking. Jack sighed; this wasn't his favourite part of being a dad.

Still, they were very happy. There had been a point when they hadn't been sure if they would get to this point so they knew how lucky they were.

Through the holidays, James grew even more and they were fascinated by him. He soon started crawling in early 2013 and the pair of them baby-proofed the apartment just in case.

In February, Ennis and Jack left James with Karen and went on a romantic trip to Vermont together. They rented a cabin and went fishing and walking through the trees, glad to have some time to relax at last. They'd been through a lot lately and needed a break; James wasn't particularly fussy but it was still a lot of hard work.

When they got back, they started to maintain some kind of relationship with James's maternal grandparents. They were as pleasant as ever and got on well with Karen. Ennis swallowed down the lump in his throat when he thought of his parents and how he wished they could be more accepting, even though he knew this was for the best. Jack soon picked up on this and would stick close to him whenever he started to feel like that.

"It's okay," he soothed Ennis on the night of his mother's birthday, knowing how hard it was for him. "I'm here, sweetheart...shh..."

Ennis clung to him, trying to get a grip on himself. "I miss them, Jack. I don't want them around you or James, or even me, but I miss them..."

"I know you do. They're still your parents, after all. You wouldn't be here if not for them. But you did the right thing and we both know it. They don't deserve you, Ennis...they just don't." He kissed his husband's forehead, trying to calm him. "I'm right here, not going anywhere. And we've got our son, who's depending on us to take care of him. We have to remain strong for him, Ennis. He needs us."

"Yeah," Ennis replied, nodding and starting to relax. Jack was right; he had to try and let go.

In April, Ennis and Jack celebrated their first wedding anniversary. They had a party in a local venue which was attended by their friends and family, excluding Ennis's parents. Everybody made a fuss over James, who was growing all the time and wasn't far off his first birthday.

To further celebrate their anniversary, Ennis and Jack let Karen take James for the night and thoroughly christened their new bed sheets together. They made love all night, until the sheets were covered in stains and they could barely move.

"We're gonna feel this in the morning," Jack panted, staring up at the ceiling. He wasn't sure how they had ended up perpendicular to the bed, but he didn't care. That had been a lot of fun.

"Tell me about it," Ennis breathed, one arm draped over Jack. "Shit...your mom's gonna see us limping tomorrow and she'll know what we were doing..."

"Ennis," Jack replied. "I think she already knows. It's our anniversary and she's babysitting. That can only mean one thing. She knows full well that we have sex."

"I know, but...she's your mom," Ennis replied. "It's just...weird."

Jack grinned and rolled onto his side, kissing his cheek. "You're cute when you blush." Ennis gave him a look, and before Jack knew what was happening he was on his back, feeling Ennis starting to push inside him without warning. "Oh God...you bastard," he groaned, feeling arousal flow through him once more.

Ennis kissed his neck. "I'll show you cute," he growled before rendering Jack unable to talk.

Jack was certain of one thing; his love for Ennis would never wane no matter how long they had left to live. Both of them were aware of what might happen to them now that they were both positive, but neither of them had any scares. Ennis was wary of taking the Videx, considering how it had landed Jack in hospital, but he was fine. They still kept a close eye on each other just in case anything seemed out of the ordinary, but for the most part they were healthy.

One of Jack's greatest fears, besides losing Ennis or James, was that Daniel Waters would either break out of prison or be released, and come looking for him. As a victim, Jack would be immediately contacted by the police if his attacker were to escape or be released early. He didn't know what he might do if that happened but he knew that Ennis would be there for him no matter what.

In late June, they started hearing things on the news that the Defence of Marriage Act and Proposition 8 of California were finally being challenged. On the 26th, both laws were found to be unconstitutional and that meant a huge breakthrough for same-sex marriage. Ennis and Jack thought of the irony; if they had stayed over there then they wouldn't be able to marry yet; licenses weren't going to be given out until next year. As it was, they had just celebrated their first anniversary and that was very special.

"That's incredible," Jack said as they watched the story on the news. "I never thought they'd do something like this in our lifetime. Thought it'd be much longer before they realised that we have rights too."

"I know," Ennis replied, rubbing Jack's arm. "Still, I'm glad we moved anyway. We've been married for a year, Jack...and that's something special." Jack nodded and snuggled closer to him, knowing he was right.

They did take a trip back to California with James to visit Lureen and Alma, who were both doing very well. Alma had met someone of her own and was now engaged; Ennis was very happy for her because she deserved someone who could love her completely. Lureen had been seeing someone for six months and they were talking about living together. Ennis and Jack were pleased to know that their friends would be okay without them close by; this made it easier.

While eating in a café, Ennis looked out the window and spotted his parents walking down the street across the road. He pointed them out to Jack, who took his hand. "Baby...I know it's hard for you but you have to be strong. Look...do you want to talk to them?"

Ennis considered it, but then remembered those dark times when Jack might have been locked up because of them. "No, I don't. Not after what they tried to do. I can't trust them." He looked away from the window and went back to helping James with his food.

Their son grew in leaps and bounds, and they had tons of footage to show people about him taking his first steps and starting to talk. They were enjoying every minute of parenthood and could now see why people wanted to have kids; it was clear to them by now.

For his first birthday, they took him to Chuck E. Cheese in Manhattan. They enjoyed the pizza and helped him in the play area, grinning the whole time at how amazing their son was. He was happy to explore his surroundings and they knew that they were very lucky. There were other same-sex parents there too, which gave Ennis and Jack an opportunity to talk to people who understood what they were going through.

"Isn't he amazing?" Jack said for the hundredth time since they'd adopted him, as they watched him sleep. He was worn out after their day and probably wouldn't wake until the morning now.

"He sure is," Ennis agreed, squeezing Jack from behind. "He's our son, Jack...and there's nobody who'd love him more than we do. We've waited for this for years."

"Yeah. I love you," Jack replied, smiling when Ennis kissed his cheek.

"Back at you, bud. You ready to go to bed?" Jack heard the insinuation and nodded, allowing Ennis to take his hand and lead him to their own bedroom. No matter how tired they were, they always had time for each other.

Five years ago, he was alone and wasn't sure what kind of future he had to look forward to. Everything had changed a year later when he'd met Ennis, and now he had everything he'd ever wanted.


End file.
